A/N: thank you for your reassurances on the last chapter, feeling a lot better about it now! Getting another update in today, aren't you lucky ;)
Changing the rating to T, simply out of precaution and some suggestive comments..but it probably won't be long and it'll need it anyway, so I'm changing it now!
Picking up her cell again, she scrolled through her contacts before pressing dial. It rang a few times before it was picked up, "Lanie," she half whispered into the phone, "I've screwed up.." And she cut off the call, tears streaming down her face.
Thirty minutes after Kate had put the phone down and collapsed onto her couch in tears, the front door swung open to reveal Lanie.
"Hey, Kate," she said as she walked into the apartment, closing the door behind her. "What's wrong? What's happened?"
"Oh god, Lanie, I've made such a mess of things!"
"Where's Charlie?" Lanie asked, looking around the room for her.
"Not here. Don't know where she is. She left. We argued," Kate said, unable to string together a coherent sentence.
"About what?" Lanie asked, moving in to sit next to Kate and giving her hand a quick squeeze.
"Castle. Me. Moms case." She took a deep breath and continued. "At the bar earlier Castle accidentally let slip that he'd looked into the case but that Charlie needed to talk to me about it. Castle came over to apologise for earlier when Charlie got home and asked what I hadn't told her."
"And let me guess, you blamed Castle for that even though you should have told Charlie ages ago?" Lanie deduced and Kate nodded. "Oh sweetie, come here," she said, hugging her tightly. "So did you tell Charlie everything?"
"Pretty much. Castle left and I explained most of it to her, she seemed okay at first that I hadn't told her sooner, but then she said something about me going to see Castle and when I said no, she flopped. Started shouting at me about blaming Castle when it was my fault and that I was just being selfish. And then she stormed out and I don't know where is, she isn't answering my calls!"
"And Castle?"
"He called just before I called you. And I..oh god I got angry with him for bringing it up," she sobbed, a fresh wave of tears flowing down her face. "And then he flipped out on me, saying it wasn't his fault..god Lanie what have I done? My sister and my...whatever he is both hate me and I don't know how to fix this!"
"Kate, look at me," Lanie said sternly and Kate raised her head to meet Lanie's gaze. "You've screwed up, okay? I'm not going to lie and say you haven't because I can see where Castle and Charlie are coming from and they're probably right. But despite that, I'm not going to walk out of here and leave you like this because I'm your best friend, okay?" Kate nodded, attempting a small smile. "You've been a complete idiot but Charlie will forgive you, you know she will, she's your sister. As for Castle..well you know him better than I do but I'm pretty sure making it up to him isn't going to be so easy.."
"I know they're both angry with me and they have a right to be, I just want to know that Charlie is okay!" Kate said.
"You want me to call her?" Lanie asked, "give me her number and I'll call from my phone, see if she'll answer to someone else." Kate did as she asked and waited patiently while Lanie dialled the number and wandered into the kitchen, she could hear talking but could make out what was being said. A few minutes later, Lanie came back into the living room, "she's fine, she's at your dads," she announced and Kate let out a sigh of relief.
"So why didn't she just tell me that!"
"She said she's still angry with you and she just needs some time..give her a couple of days and then you can call her and apologise, it'll be fine, I promise."
"And Castle?"
"Girl, I can't help you there. The man has done everything he possibly can to make you realise the two of you belong together and yet you're still fighting it, what more do you want him to do? No, this is all on you now Kate, it's up to you to decide what happens with you and Castle and let me tell you, if it doesn't end in hot, steamy make up sex then you're doing it all wrong."
For the first time since leaving the bar that night, Kate laughed, trust Lanie to put it like that. "Thank you, Lanie, for everything. I know I screwed up but I don't know what I would have done without you..you're right, I'll give Charlie a day or two to cool off and then apologise..Castle, I have no clue yet, but I'll figure something out."
"You're welcome honey," Lanie said, "now, do you need me to stay the night or are you okay now?"
"You're always welcome to stay, Lanie, you know that, but judging how close you and Javi were earlier on, I'm assuming he's somewhere waiting for you?"
"Mm, well he did say to call if I wanted to see him.." Lanie replied with a grin.
"Then go get him," Kate said, "you've done more than enough for me, go have some fun!"
"Oh and how fun it will be..he can do this thing with his-"
"Okay okay!" Kate shouted. "The guy is like my brother, Lanie, I don't want details!"
"You're missing out, honey," Lanie chuckled as she headed to the door, "and don't think when you and writer boy finally get it on that I won't be wanting details!" She added as she hugged Kate and left, leaving the apartment in silence once again.
Kate ran herself a bath to relax, before slipping into bed and attempting to sleep, desperately trying to push thoughts of Castle from her mind.
"Okay guys, we're done," Kate announced. Their suspect had just confessed and was being charged as they spoke, meaning the end of the day - and the week for them, with just paperwork left to finish up.
"Brilliant, let's get out of here," Espo said and he and Ryan grabbed their coats ready to head out. "We're going for a drink, Beckett, you coming?"
"No, not tonight guys," she said, "I'm just gonna finish up this paperwork and head home, see you Monday?"
The boys rattled off a goodbye and rushed out of the precinct. It had been a long, hard week and it was a relief to finally be able to get out of there. It had been even harder for Beckett - Castle hadn't made an appearance all week. She'd called him when their first body dropped on Monday morning but he didn't answer. A little while later, he had text to say he was busy writing and he'd pop in later if he could. That was five days ago and she hadn't heard from him since, he must have written a whole book by now.
Espo and Ryan had questioned her on it on Monday afternoon, but she'd given them the same excuse Castle had given her and they had said no more about it, even taking it in turns to make her coffee, which she really appreciated, she was lucky to have those two on her team, but it just didn't feel right without Castle. Over the past four years he had situated himself right in the middle of it and now that he wasn't around things were off. No one had any crazy theories and it was starting to feel like it did when he wasn't around.
Pushing thoughts of Castle away for now, Kate made a start on the paperwork and didn't look up for a good twenty minutes, when she heard the sound of the elevator ping. Swivelling round in her chair, she craned her neck to see who it was - the time was gone 6.30 on a Friday, everyone had already left for the weekend.
"You finished yet?" Came Charlie's voice as she rounded the corner.
"Just about, why?" Kate asked, putting the files away in her desk.
"Because we're going out. You, me, Lanie and Jenny. Dinner and cocktails, get you out of this funk you're in," Charlie said, plonking herself down in Castle's - no, the empty - chair next to Kate's desk.
"I'm not in a funk!" Kate denied and Charlie raised an eyebrow. "Okay, maybe I am a little, but really? Dinner and cocktails?"
"Oh come on, it'll be fun! Lanie mentioned something about a Mexican place she knows you like, her and Jenny are meeting us there at 8, when gives us just enough time to get you showered and changed," Charlie announced with a smile, "chop chop, we don't have all night!"
Rolling her eyes Kate reluctantly left her chair, following Charlie out of the precinct. Maybe this is just what she needed though, a night with the girls and a lot of alcohol. Feeling slightly more optimistic, she looped her arm through Charlie's and started telling her about the best cocktails in Manhattan.
Kate had bitten the bullet midweek and had met with Charlie to apologise. They'd met at the coffee shop Kate and Castle a bad gone to the night Charlie had come home, and Kate had once again pushed thoughts of him from her mind.
Charlie was already waiting when Kate arrived, she'd left the precinct, telling Espo and Ryan she had an errand to run. Luckily, they'd decided that Castle not showing up this week was bad enough for her and hadn't called her out on it.
"Hey," she smiled, sliding into the seat opposite Charlie.
"Hi," Charlie returned, without the smile.
So that was how it was going to be was it? "Look, Charlie, I know you're angry with me but I'm sorry, okay? You were right, I was blaming Castle when it was my fault and I shouldn't have done." She took a deep breath and continued her apology. "And I know I should have told you about moms case sooner but it practically ripped us apart at the time, I couldn't face losing you for good, even if you were on the other side of the world."
"I uh, might have overreacted slightly.." Charlie admitted sheepishly.
"It wasn't anything I didn't need need, though," Kate told her with a smile. "I guess you could say it kicked my ass into gear and made me realise what I was doing. To you and to Castle."
"Have you spoken to him?"
"Not since the other night," Kate said and she launched into the story of how she'd got angry with Castle again and that they hadn't seen each other all week, including Lanie's involvement. "So Lanie told it to me straight and here we are, and um I was kinda hoping you would be able to forgive me for what I've done.."
"Oh Katie, of course I forgive you! I'm not saying you did the right thing but I know you, I know you have reasons for everything you do and even if they weren't the right reasons they felt right to you at the time. But I promise you, I'm not running away again okay? I've missed you and dad so much, I couldn't leave again, no matter what happens."
"Good. 'Cause now that I've got my sister back I have no intention of ever letting her leave ever again!" Kate grinned, "so, we're good?"
"Yeah, Katherine, we're good."
"Shut up, Charlotte," Kate replied with a wink, the two of them falling back into their old teasing routines. Now all she had to do was square things out with Castle.
"Kate!" Charlie called from the lounge, "are you ready?"
"Yeah, two seconds," Kate called back, checking her appearance one last time before heading out to join Charlie.
"Wow, you look hot!" Charlie grinned and Kate couldn't help but laugh.
"Charlie, we look exactly the same - if I look hot then so do you."
"Exactly," she replied, taking Kate's hand and dragging her out the door. "Come on or we're going to be late and I'm starving!"
Kate rolled her eyes and allowed herself to be led out by her sister. She was pretty happy with her appearance tonight, she'd borrowed a dress from Charlie - it was a hot pink number that covered her from her collarbone to the top of her thighs. On the left hand side, there was a slit running from the bottom of the dress up to where her thigh met her torso, pinned together with giant dress pins. She'd teamed it with sky high bright pink stiletto heels and a nude clutch, leaving her hair down and curly and had added more eyeliner and a light pink gloss to her lips.
Charlie had straightened out her curls, which at least would make it easier for Jenny and Lanie to tell them apart. She'd decided on a jade green bodycon dress of Kate's that hugged her figure perfectly, and she'd slipped on black heels. They both looked amazing and Charlie knew it, they weren't going to be short of attention tonight.
They arrived at the restaurant, which was also a bar and headed inside to meet the other two. "Wanna make them guess?" Charlie muttered into Kate's ear as they walked to the table, bringing back the game they had played when they were younger, making people guess which one was which, and giving away as little as possible.
"Sure," Kate replied, "10 bucks says Lanie figures it out."
"You're on," Charlie replied as they reached the table.
"There you two are, we were starting to get worried!" Lanie said, "okay, so you gonna tell us who is who?" She asked, "I might be your best friend, Kate, but even I can't tell you apart right now."
"Nope, we're gonna make you guess," Kate grinned as her and Charlie stood opposite Lanie.
"Ooo, this sounds like fun!" Jenny said and the four of them laughed.
"Well," Lanie began, "that green dress is one of Kate's, but that doesn't mean anything, the two of you are the same size. But I haven't seen the pink one before - either it's new or it's Charlie's."
Kate was impressed at Lanie's knowledge of her wardrobe, they weren't the same size so they didn't borrow each other's clothes but Lanie still seemed to know that she hadn't seen this pink dress before.
Lanie surveyed them both for a few minutes before coming to her decision. "Okay, Kate is in pink, Charlie is in green."
"What makes you think that?" Charlie asked. Lanie was right, of course, but she wanted to know how she'd figured it out.
"Well you two might have thought you were being clever, but the slit in that dress means you can see Kate's tattoo," Lanie stated simply. "Does Castle know where it is yet? She asked Kate.
"No," Kate replied with a laugh. Trust Lanie to use that as her way of differentiating between them. Glancing down, she realised that her tattoo on her thigh was just visible through the part in her dress. It started just above her hip and finished at the top of her thigh and she still hadn't told Castle where it was, maybe one day soon he'd see it for himself.
"You owe me ten bucks," Kate said to Charlie as they sat down, Charlie opposite Lanie and Kate opposite Jenny.
"You had a bet on it?" Jenny asked in amusement, she didn't know Kate that well and finding out she had a twin had been a shock but it was proving to be quite fun.
"Yep and as usual my sister won," Charlie grumbled. "Okay okay, here you go," she said, pulling the money from her purse. "Now, we need drinks!"
They ordered two pitchers of sex on the beach to start and began drinking and chatting.
"So," Charlie began, looking to Lanie. "Kate tells me you and Espo have a...thing."
"Mm, Kevin mentioned something about that too," Jenny chimed in.
"What?" Lanie asked, seeing all three women looking at her, "we're just having a bit of fun, no harm in it," she said with a grin.
"So it's not serious?" Jenny asked, looking slightly crestfallen. "I was hoping Javi would settle down soon," she paused at the look of horror on Lanie's face. "Oh no, I don't mean anything by it, I just want Javi to be as happy as Kev and I." A dreamy look appeared on Jenny's face and she blushed. "God, I'm sorry, I get a little carried away sometimes and the alcohol doesn't help!"
"Don't worry about it," Kate said with a laugh, "you're lucky, you've got a man who loves you unconditionally and it's obvious you love him too!"
"Yeah and if you stopped being so stubborn you'd be just as happy," Charlie muttered and Lanie grinned at her.
"See," Lanie said, "I'm not the only one who can see it!"
"Oh no," Jenny joined in, "it's obvious you and Rick should be together, Kev's been saying it for a couple of years now!"
Kate blushed, she knew Lanie's views on the matter and had kind of figured Charlie would agree, but hearing Jenny talk about it too just made her realise how much she'd screwed things up.
"Okay, shall we order some food?" Kate suggested loudly, trying to steer the conversation away from her non-existent relationship with Castle.
"We're just teasing, Kate. We just want you to be happy," Lanie said.
"I know," she told them with a smile. "Now, I think we need more drinks too, the first lot seem to have gone pretty quickly!"
Their evening passed with more drinks and food and a lot of laughter. By the time dessert had been cleared, the four of them were rather tipsy and conversation had moved onto embarrassing situations when they were teenagers.
"Our parents once caught Kate sneaking out at 11 at night..instead of saying anything, dad followed her in his car and waited until she'd gone into this party she was going to, went in behind her and embarrassed her in front of everyone," Charlie said, reminding Kate of the event.
"I think dad was more embarrassed though," Kate laughed, "when he walked in I was playing tonsil tennis with someone he definitely would not approve of."
"Nobody would approve of him, Kate, I swear the guy didn't shower or wash his hair, I don't know what you were thinking!"
"I was trying to rebel against anything I possibly could, didn't even go to prom, remember?"
"So you two weren't into the same guys then?" Jenny asked.
"Well, technically you could say yes - Kate was into practically anyone back then," Charlie teased.
"You know, I would deny it but it's kinda true," Kate admitted. "I wasn't as bad as Charlie is making out though, I was in a relationship with most of them..they just didn't last very long!"
"Mm, I think Ashley was the longest until you were about 22 right?" Charlie said and she didn't miss the blush appearing on Kate's face. "You haven't told them about Ashley?!" She asked and Kate shook her head.
"Who's Ashley? Is he still around or something?" Lanie asked.
"She lives in Texas," Charlie said, "on a ranch or something right?"
Lanie almost spat her drink out. "She?!" She spluttered.
Kate rolled her eyes. "Yes, Charlie is telling the truth, when I was 20 I was in a relationship with a girl. It was only like three months or something but it was fun while it lasted."
"Does Castle know?" Lanie, Charlie and Jenny asked in unison.
"No, and he isn't going to," she warned.
"Oh god, please can we tell him, I need to see his face!" Charlie giggled and Lanie joined in.
"Pretty pretty please, I'd love to see you make him speechless!"
"Trust me, I don't need to tell him that to make him speechless," Kate told them with a wink, eliciting another round of giggles.
"Katherine Beckett I never," Lanie said in mock horror, "are you suggesting what I think you're suggesting?"
"If it involves me and Castle naked then yes, probably," Kate laughed. She hadn't felt this good all week, the alcohol was helping but she knew this chat was just banter between friends and they wouldn't tell anyone.
"I want details," Jenny said, surprising them all. "What? He's got a bit of a reputation, hasn't he, I want to know if he's as good as the stories say!"
"Well maybe I should go and find out," Kate said playfully, earning shocked looks from the three other women. Well, she had to apologise somehow, didn't she.
A/N: this chapter is a little happier! The pink dress I'm putting Kate in is the one Stana wore to the CBGB premiere because she looked hot, google it if you haven't seen it! Reviews greatly appreciated :)
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