Disclaimer: I do not own the characters from the Yu Yu Hakusho series. I only own the storyline and the few original characters within. Alright, Kurama and Hiei have to go and meet with Koenma. What will he tell them that changes everything? Will they fall into depressions that they cannot recover from, or will their love for each other pull them through? Without further delay... I give you Chapter Ten: Depressions...

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Kurama and Hiei walked into Koenma's office, Kiara following close behind them. She looked around, noticing that things had changed since the last time that she had been in here, five years ago. She shrugged her shoulders, it didn't matter, it wasn't her place to judge the place. She came to stand beside the two as they stopped in front of Koenma's desk. Koenma looked up at them and smiled lightly. "I'm glad that all three of you are here."

"You did invite us," Kurama said politely. "So.. you needed to tell us something. I hope it is quick... I want to get home to see my mother."

Koenma looked down and sighed lightly. "I'm afraid that will be impossible, Kurama. The borders to the Human World have been sealed. Demons on the other side will turn human or die, and humans on this side will convert to Demon world humans. There will be no more going back and forth."

Hiei blanched and looked at Koenma. "What about my sister?"

Koenma sighed lightly. "It has been three weeks since your disappearances in the Human World. Unfortunately, I had no choice but to make that decision for you. The borders were sealed last week."

Kurama blinked. "What decision did you HAVE to make for us?"

"You were already on this side, and there was no way to track either one of you... so... here you are," he said sadly. "I'm sorry, it wasn't my call. My father wanted the borders sealed permanently... I couldn't argue."

"What about my sister?" Hiei snapped. This time, Koenma looked at him and sighed lightly.

"I sent Yukina a letter. And she came to have a meeting with me," Koenma said and looked down. "I gave her the same choice I gave all the others. She could come back to the Demon World, and remain a demon... or she could stay in the Human World, and become a human. I told her that you were alive... and that the stories in the Human World were not true. Stories were saying that both of you were killed in a car accident on the way home from work one night... but I told her that it wasn't true. She did believe me... and she asked for a few days to think about it. She returned to me and told me that she thought that she was better off in the Human World."

Hiei felt the blood drain from his face, and he felt sick. He looked at Koenma, tears on the corners of his eyes. "You... you let her stay in the Human World?"

Kurama frowned. The voice that he heard wasn't the Hiei that he knew. This voice was broken, defeated. Koenma looked down and sighed lightly. "It was her decision, Hiei. I gave her the choice... and I couldn't change her mind. I did try, but her mind was made up. She wanted to stay in the Human World. But..." He reached into his desk drawer and pulled out a thick envelope. "... she did ask me to give you this, whenever I saw you again."

Hiei took the envelope, but couldn't bring himself to open it. The fear of what was inside tore at his heart. Kurama felt like he was going to die, seeing the look on the fire demon's face. Koenma sighed lightly as he turned to Kurama. "To you... Kurama. I am sorry, but the decision was made for you as well. You cannot go back to the Human World. Your mother mourns your loss, but I can tell you this. I looked into her future and soon she WILL remarry and gain a stepson in the marriage. It will help her cope with the pain of loosing you. I looked farther into her future, and I heard her last thoughts before she dies. She says that she is coming home to you. She thinks about you everyday, and longs to join you. And one day she will. But it will not be you. It will be the son that she lost."

Kiara whimpered lightly, the sudden sadness that surrounded the two of them was overwhelming. She felt tears run down her face. The two standing beside her had just lost everything. EVERYTHING that ever meant anything to either of them... and here she was standing there. She had everything. She had her father back in her life, she had a happy tribe, a healthy child... and yet... there was so much sadness. Her ears pressed to her skull, how dare he ask her here to witness this! She was already on the emotional roller coaster of a lifetime with being the leader of the tribe and being a mother at the same time... how the hell was she supposed to deal with all this too? Koenma turned to her, and his heart fell. He felt ashamed for having her come, but he knew that she needed to be here for them. She was going to have to make decisions for them, right here, right now.

"Kiara," Koenma said lightly. "I know this is hard... seeing them like this, I know that it hurts. But I needed you here for one reason. Your father has a human body. If he remains in it, he will weaken to the point of death. You have to convince him to reclaim his youko form. To reclaim his former strength so that he can help him deal with what just transpired."

Kiara's ears flattened against her head again as she frowned at him. "How dare you! You ignorant, selfish son of a bitch! You should have asked him that BEFORE you told him all of this!"

Kurama looked up and shook his head. "We need a moment."

Kurama took both Kiara and Hiei by the arms and walked them into an empty office. He released Kiara and turned to face Hiei. Hiei hadn't said a word, hadn't moved since he was handed that envelope, and it was barely hanging in his hand as it was. Hiei's eyes were dull, almost lifeless as he looked down at the floor. He was silently wishing that he could be swallowed by the cold tiles beneath his feet. Kiara knew how he felt. Nothing happened to affect her and yet, she too wished that this was all a bad dream and that the floor would just open up and take her with him. She frowned as Kurama knelt beside the fire demon.

"Hiei, listen to me," Kurama said lightly, putting a finger under the chin that quivered lightly. "Hiei... I need to know one thing..."

Hiei didn't see him, he didn't see anything. All he saw was his sister's face. The angelic glow of her soft skin as she smiled at the snow falling around her. He could hear Kurama's voice... but he couldn't move to react to it in any way. Kurama shook him lightly, calling out his name, but still... Hiei was frozen in time. Kurama sighed lightly as he pulled Hiei into a tight embrace. He silently begged the fire demon to respond. But nothing got through. Hiei was numb, nothing at all could heal the hole that he felt in his heart. Not even the love that was clearly shown right in front of him.

Kurama sighed lightly as he looked up at Kiara, who seemed like she was feeling every ounce of pain that Hiei was feeling. He sighed again as he shook his head. Koenma made a mistake in bringing her here. She was such an open book, submittable to everything, even the pain of others. Kurama couldn't see what made Koenma think that SHE would be the one with a sound mind after this. He was able to handle information like this... he had heard worse before, had been through worse before... but Hiei was still young and so was she. He sighed lightly. He could feel that Hiei loved him. Had felt it all along and just hoped that he was going to make the right decision. He stood up and let go of Hiei. He sighed once again and turned to walk out of the office, but Hiei grabbed his arm. "I do love you, fox. It is you... not your form."

Kurama smiled as he hugged him close. "You wouldn't change your mind if I took my old form?"

Hiei wrapped his arms around his fox and shook his head. "I love you for you, fox."

Kurama smiled as the words came to his ears. He knew that his decision was made, he would return to his fox form and he would try to deal with his loss, and Hiei's. Hoping that his daughter wouldn't fall into the same depression as Hiei, he reached out and pulled her into a hug. After a moment, Kurama pulled away and walked out of the office and back to Koenma's desk. "I will regain my fox form, and I will retake my powers."

Koenma nodded and reached into his desk. Before Koenma handed him the pouch in his hand he stopped and looked at Kurama. "This WILL hurt. I will ask that you do this away from your loved ones. In their present states of mind, they will not be able to handle your transformation."

Kurama blinked and nodded. "I will."

Koenma hesitated and handed him the pouch. "Only do the transformation under a full moon. It has to be done when the moon is at it's highest peak in the sky, otherwise it will kill you."

Kurama nodded, he was a fox and was able to determine when the moon was at its peak. He had heard of this transformation before, but he had never heard of anyone who had ever survived it. Being a higher class demon, he knew that he would be able to survive, but it was gonna hurt, and there was no question of it.

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About half an hour later, Kurama, Hiei and Kiara walked out of Koenma's office and headed for home. Hiei still hadn't opened the envelope, but had told them both that he would later. Kiara had a hand on his shoulder and he smiled weakly at her. Kiara sighed lightly. She was going to have to have one of the other mothers watch Calleigh for a while. If not, then there would be a total mess on her hands. She didn't know what she would do if Calleigh started to feel the way that she was feeling now. Kurama and Hiei walked in silence beside her, making the long trip even longer for them. It was only about eight miles away... but it seemed like a hundred at the time.

Hiei sighed lightly as he stopped and leaned against a tree for a moment. He looked down at the envelope in his hand and shook his head. Kurama came to stand next to him. He put a gentle hand on Hiei's arm and rubbed gently. "You okay?"

He shook his head. He looked back down at the envelope, he knew that it would contain the answers that he needed. He just feared that they would haunt him for the rest of his life because they were in fact the last words that he would ever hear from his sister. Tears stung the corners of his eyes and Kurama wiped them away, Hiei leaning into his touch.

"She loved you, Hiei," Kurama said lightly. "I know she did. There isn't a sister in the world that wouldn't love their brother the way she loved you."

Hiei smiled lightly. "And to think... you only met her one time. For like... ten minutes."

Kurama smiled and leaned his forehead against Hiei's. "I know you. That's all that matters."

Hiei nodded as he felt several tears roll down his face. Kiara felt them herself. They were so strong at the moment. She felt like shit! She was the one that seemed to be sucking all their negative energy from them... and that was the part that scared her the most about her daughter. She DID NOT want Calliegh to see this, nor did she want Calliegh anywhere near this. She made the decision.

"I know somewhere nearby that is secluded," she said to them. "Somewhere that the two of you can be together. It's not far from the tunnels, but it's not connected to them."

Kurama looked at her and nodded lightly. "I'd appreciate it."

Kiara nodded and led them to the west. They walked for a half of an hour and arrived at a hollow tree. This tree was different... you could actually tell that there was a house here. For the front was the tree, and then the back was squared out into a house. Hiei looked at it, smiling because it was far better than living underground. He would go crazy if he had to stay in those tunnels all the time. He needed the light, the fresh air. They walked into the entrance at the front of the tree and Kiara stood aside to let them in. They looked around and Kurama turned to Kiara, who was staring enchanted at the bed.

"That is where Calliegh was born, isn't it?" he asked, seeing the look on her face.

She shook her head. "No... but it was where I discovered that I was pregnant. I was so happy at that time, something about this house does that. It seems to draw out the bad and bring you the good. I thought about it, because I know you two need time to mourn... and I was hoping that this place could help you with that."

Hiei looked at her and frowned. "Nothing is going to change how we feel, Kiara. Not a house, not kind words from people... only time will be able to help us move on."

She frowned at him. "Isn't that what I said. You two need TIME to mourn. I am not expecting to come back in a few days and find you two all chipper and cheerful. I know that it hurts."

Kurama stepped into the house and looked around, something was vaguely familiar about this place. Like a memory from a dream. He looked around, looked up at the rafters above, then to the little fireplace. He frowned and looked at his daughter, standing against the open door. "Where are we?"

She smiled lightly. "Mama once called it "Sanctuary"."

Hiei looked down. Shit... he now understood why Kiara got offended by his words. She brought them to her mother's hideaway and he was shoving it in her face. She looked at him and smiled gently. She turned back to Kurama and her smile grew. "It will help you both heal. God knows that it helped me heal on many occasions."

With that, she turned and walked back out the door, closing it gently behind her. Hiei watched Kurama as he looked around. Hiei peaked at what he was seeing, but no vision came... only words. Words of a young woman describing a house, one that was a place of healing. She told him of how it's energy seemed to take the bad away and leave only room for the good. He could hear her describe the little house, down to a tee. He looked up at the rafters, exposed but not intrusive, he looked at the fireplace, tiny but effective. He sighed lightly as he took a seat on one of the chairs that sat next to the darkened fireplace. With a flick of his wrist, a blaze began in the pit there. Kurama looked at him, amazed that all those times that he had to manually light a fire, and all Hiei had to do was wave his hand.

Hiei smirked, hearing that thought. He held out his hand to the fire and Kurama stared as a dancing flame shot to his hand and engulfed his hand, not burning it, but more caressing. He frowned. "Showoff."

Hiei smiled as he released the flame, it dancing back into the rest of the whipping flames. Hiei glanced over his shoulder to see Kurama staring at him. Hiei had heard Koenma's advise about regaining his late youko form. He had heard Kurama agree to do it out of the range of his loved ones. But at this present time... he wasn't about to let Kurama keep that promise. "When is the next full moon?"

Kurama frowned as he looked over Hiei's expression. He knew that expression, Hiei had his mind made up about something and it had to do with his transformation. "Next week. Why do you ask?"

Hiei nodded and turned back to the flames. "I want to be there for you. I don't care that you promised Koenma that you would go away to do it."

Kurama shook his head as he came to crouch next to Hiei in the chair. "I have seen this transformation done, before, Hiei. It isn't something that needs to be shared with a loved one. It is painful, and heart-wrenching... I wouldn't dare bring any of that on you."

"I don't care what you think, Kurama," Hiei said looking at him. "I will be there, whether you like it or not. I know what you say is true. That you don't want me to witness it, but I want to be there. If you were alone... and the transformation didn't work... how could I ever forgive myself?"

"This was my decision, Hiei," Kurama said lightly. "I will not subject you to that kind of pain."

Hiei looked at him and frowned. "I will be there, fox. Whether it is with you, or not. I WILL be there."

Kurama frowned. He shook his head, knowing that he was fighting a loosing battle. Hiei was the most stubborn man alive and he knew it. During the course of their relationship, Kurama knew that when Hiei made up his mind about something, there was nothing that could be said or done to change it. He sighed as he stood up. He sat in the other chair across from the firepit and looked into the dancing flames. "Please, Hiei. I am begging you. I am asking you, please let me do this on my own."

Hiei smirked, but didn't say a word. This angered Kurama, for he knew that Hiei would go. He knew that Hiei was going to follow him, even if he did use his energy to mask his tracks. Hiei was always able to find him. Perhaps it was fate, that they had been brought together. Perhaps it was the world's way of saying that the fox did have someone other than his daughter in his corner. He just hoped that the transformation went smoothly... but he knew it wouldn't... it never did. There was always a great test of endurance and will to survive with this transformation, one he knew that he HAD to beat in order to survive. But a glimmer of hope rose within his chest. Perhaps if Hiei was there... maybe that would help the procedure and get him through all that much easier. But doubts still fogged his mind as he glanced over at the fire demon next to him, staring at the envelope in his hand.

"Don't you want to know?" Kurama asked as he seen Hiei sit the envelope on his lap.

Hiei shook his head. "I can't."

Kurama frowned and stared back into the flames. "If you read what she had to say... I will... agree to let you be there when I transform."

Hiei glanced at him with a smirk. "That's called blackmail, you know."

Kurama looked at him. "It is called bartering. Perhaps your sister's words will comfort you, maybe not... but knowing will help you move on. It will help you deal with what you will go through with me. I know the effects of the change, I know that I will be different for a few days. But I told you... I will let you be there, if I personally believe that you can handle it."

"Blackmail," Hiei said under his breath as he looked back to the envelope in his lap. "Alright... you win, fox."

"I always do," Kurama said as he looked into the fire. He heard Hiei pick up the envelope and turn it over. He listened as he ran his finger across the back, opening the flap.

Hiei stopped once the envelope was opened. He looked at his hands, they were shaking and shook his head. "I can't..."

Kurama looked at him, frowning as he seen Hiei's hands shake. He sat forward and placed a hand on top of Hiei's, knowing that it wouldn't calm the shaking. "I'm right here, Hiei. You aren't alone."

Hiei looked at him and seen the sincerity in the green emeralds that stared back at him. He moved his hand and Kurama pulled away. Instead of pulling out whatever was in the envelope... Hiei lifted the envelope and Kurama stared at him as he tried to hand it to him. Kurama shook his head. "I can't do it, Hiei. It was addressed to you."

Hiei shook his head. "I can't read it... please, Kurama... for me."

Kurama could hear that there were several words missing from his sentence. The emotion that rolled across his face and in his eyes was eating at the little fire demon and Kurama sighed lightly as he slid from his chair. He took the envelope and sat on his knees in front of Hiei. Hiei felt the pressure of Kurama's back against his legs and picked up a lock of hair that had fallen over his knee. Kurama opened the envelope and pulled out a letter, frowning as it had some weight to it. He turned the letter to the side and something fell into his hand. He looked at it and it seemed to be a tear gem from an ancient race. He reached up and handed it to Hiei.

"My mother's tear gem..." Kurama barely heard the words, but he smelt the tears that followed the sentence.

Kurama dared not look back at the fire demon, he knew that Hiei would cover his emotions, and he knew that the only way that Hiei was going to get through this was if he let them loose. He kept his back to Hiei to allow him the simple kindness of privacy while Hiei's emotions poured out through his eyes. Kurama opened the letter and sighed lightly. He just hoped that he didn't get choked up about this before it was all over.

My dearest brother.

If you are reading this letter, then the borders between our worlds has been sealed up permanently. I want you to know, Hiei that my decision to stay in the Human World was not to hurt you in any way. I feel at peace here. And now that I have my degree and I can help people here... I simply couldn't leave. I love you so much, brother. Inside the envelope is the only thing that we have left of our mother. It was her last gift to you. I hope that it brings you some clarity. She loved you more than words could say, Hiei. She never wanted to give you up. She couldn't bare to think about what was done to you, that her will to live didn't last long. She asked me to give you a simple message when I finally found you. She told me to tell you that she loved you, and that she wished things were different. She would have loved to get to know her son. But males are forbidden to our kind. She regretted having stayed on the Ice Kingdom to have us, knowing that if she had gone somewhere else, then we both would have known our mother's love.

I know that you and Kurama needed each other. I was told that if you couldn't be found before the borders were closed, then the decision would be made for you. I too wish things could be different. I wish that you could be here with me in the Human World... but I know the fact is this... you belong in the Demon World, as does Kurama. I hope that your futures are bright, and filled with love and happiness. Just like mine. My happiness comes from the help that I give to others, the people that truly needed someone to look out for them. I have always wanted that person to be me. I know that you love the Demon World as much as you love me. I want you to know, that you will always be my brother, and I will always be thinking of you. I don't think that I will ever be ABLE to forget about you. You are my brother, the only family that I have left, and know that though my decision was hard to make... I am happy that we had what little time together that we did.

I love you so much, Hiei. I can't say it enough, how much I care about you. I will miss you, but I can only pray that you will be happy one day too. I know that my decision will be hard for you, and I am hoping that you are not hard on yourself for it. This decision was hard for me to make, but in simple truth... I was never really happy in the Demon World. I belong in the Human World, whereas you belong to the other worlds. I know that our separation will be tough, for both of us. But just know that you will never be very far from my heart, and that your love will always be here with me. I can always feel that warmth you always gave me. I know that it will always be there, no matter how many worlds apart we are. We will always be connected and we will always be family. Give Kurama my regards, and let him in, Hiei. He needs you as much as you need him. Do not let your stubbornness be the end of something that will be great for you both. Your love is pure, I knew it the moment that I met him. He loves you Hiei, almost as much as I do. Maybe even more.

You will always be in my heart, I love you, my brother.

Forever in your heart, Yukina.

Kurama folded the letter and looked down. Damn... that was rough... He glanced over his shoulder and looked at Hiei, seeing the ruby eyes staring ahead of him. There was emotions rolling through, but Kurama couldn't name them. He could see love and sadness there but so many more came and went... he didn't have a chance to see what he was feeling. "Hiei? You okay?"

Hiei snapped his head back, looking down at the peaceful green orbs staring back at him. He nodded lightly and swallowed lightly, "I'll be alright."

Kurama leaned his head back, laying his head on Hiei's knees. "I'm so sorry, Hiei."

Hiei laid his hand on top of Kurama's forehead as he could feel the energy just draining from his body. Being an emotional wreck sucked ass. He suddenly felt like all he wanted to do was sleep. But then again, all he wanted to do was cry, or scream, or cry. He didn't know what he wanted. He knew that Kurama was watching him and looked down, only to find that he was dead wrong. Kurama's head was laid on his knees, and his eyes were closed, as if in thought. They opened to look up into ruby red. A tiny smile crossed his lips, but Hiei didn't even have the strength to do that. Hiei looked at the necklace in his hand and sighed lightly. He placed the chain around his neck and sat back against the chair. He had lost everyone in his family... his mother... his sister... god knows who the hell his father is...

"I love you, Hiei," Kurama said lightly as he snuggled his head into a more comfortable position, against Hiei's thighs. "I always will. I'm here for you."

Hiei placed his hand on Kurama's head and ran his thumb through the silky tresses there. He frowned... how was Kurama able to deal with his own grief so easily? He loved his human mother... and yet... he didn't seem as upset that he would never see her again. Perhaps it was the glimpse into the future that Koenma had given him, seeing her happy once again. But still... it had to be hard, knowing that he would never again hear her voice calling him, or her gentle hands hugging him... how was he so calm about it?

But Hiei was dead wrong. Kurama was in misery. His green eyes focused on the carpet there and he sighed lightly. He would miss his mother terribly. He did love her, more than words could say. He had to smirk about the thought that just a few minutes ago... Yukina's letter was a mystery to them both, and now it was bringing them together in the simplest of ways. Just to be near each other, in the tiniest physical contact with each other was the best of medicines at the moment. Hiei's breath grew steady and Kurama could feel that he had fallen asleep. Kurama sighed again and thought about his mother, and how much he missed her already. When Kurama was sure that Hiei was in a deeper sleep, he lifted his head and looked up at him. As peaceful as ever. Even that little frown on his face made him seem too peaceful. Kurama smiled, having always enjoyed watching Hiei sleep. He slowly stood up, gently lifted Hiei off the chair and carried him to the bed. He laid his slumbering partner on the bed and pulled the covers up over him, looking back at the fire. It had gone out... must be because Hiei's energy was no longer fixed on it. He shrugged his shoulders as he climbed into the bed beside Hiei and wrapped his arms around the tiny fire demon. He closed his eyes and said a silent prayer. "Please let us heal. We need to heal... please help us." And as the fox fell into a deep sleep, something in the house changed. The sadness in the room seemed to dissipate as the couple slept. The morning would start fresh and the couple just hoped that the shock was over, but neither could be sure of it.

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Phew... End of Chapter Ten: Depressions. Alright... as I have said before... I hate it when my characters are sad... and so therefore the next chapter will definitely skip straight to the transformation, which is gonna be a mind blower as well. So until then, I can only hope that you will all leave me your comments, reviews and your requests. I will get back to them soon. So ta ta for now.