I'm really sorry for the long delay... I feel like I've let my readers down and I apologize for it but I happened to have a huge writer's block which just wouldn't leave me alone, not to mention real life getting in the way. I actually had a big part of this one written for a while but I couldn't finish it properly... Anyway after going to see Desolation of Smaug on wednesday (one of the good things about living in France, I got to see it two days before everyone else!) inspiration seemed to just come back and since I still intend to continue this one here is finally a new chapter, if there are still a few of you interested in this story!

Chapter 10

"Is it common for wizards to just show up out of nowhere?" Thorin said, his gaze not leaving the grey figure.

"It is undoubtedly more common than barefoot dwarves" the wizard replied, raising his bushy eyebrows in amusement.

"Why are you here?" Thorin asked suspiciously.

"Because you need to talk to someone who can bring an answer to your questions." Gandalf answered simply. "You are torn between two cultures, and it will not get better until you learn to accept that both are part of who you are."

"Who are you, and how do you know so much about me?"

"I already answered that, Master Dwarf" Gandalf said, looking annoyed. "I am a wizard, and I know many things. I would suggest that you ask important questions instead of wasting my time with nonsense."

Thorin lowered his gaze and sat down on the ground, too dazed to be upset by the wizard's harsh tone. The emotional turmoil he had been thrown in for the last few days were taking its toll on him, leaving him feeling empty and numb.

"I have no idea who I truly am, or what I really want" the young dwarf said slowly.

Gandalf nodded, staring at him intently.

"Yes, go on" he said with an unreadable expression on his face.

"Everyone wants something different from me, but how am I supposed to either live a peaceful life in the Shire or be the leader the exiled dwarves of Erebor are in need of when I can't even figure out what I want for myself?"

"You need to answer that first question before you can even think about the other ones" Gandalf said gently. "You can't pretend to decide what your future will be until you have come to understand your past and your present. I may have some answers concerning your past."

The wizard sat down under a tree, took out his pipe and made himself comfortable, blowing smoke rings while Thorin watched him in disbelief.

"You have already heard of your grandfather's gold madness, but you may not know of the many conspiracies that were formed against him. Many dwarves were convinced that the kingdom was about to fall due to Thror's madness and they were determined to deny him and the line of Durin the right to rule. You were abducted by a group of such dwarves who had planned to use you as a hostage to force Thror to give up the throne. But you escaped" Gandalf said with a small smile. "I'm not sure where they planned to keep you captive, probably as far away from Erebor as possible, but you managed to run away."

"And this is when Bilbo found me" Thorin said deep in thought. He could barely remember that moment now, but somehow it made sense. He had always wondered how he had ended up in the Shire, and now he knew the truth, although it was a small comfort to him.

"How is this supposed to help me decide what to do?" Thorin said bitterly.

"Doesn't it fill some blanks from your past? Knowing your past will help you know yourself. Once you know who you are you will be able to make a choice" the wizard said slowly, as if he was explaining something evident to a stubborn child.

"And how exactly do you suggest that I do that?" Thorin said with a frown. He had been talking to the wizard for barely a couple of minutes and he was already losing his patience. Gandalf's answers were not what he was looking for, and he couldn't see how this was supposed to be of any help.

"What does your heart tell you?" Gandalf said, staring intently at the dwarf.

Thorin almost rolled his eyes at him for answering his question with another question.

"Nothing at all" he spat out bitterly. "Emptiness is all I feel right now, and the only thing I want to do is run away from everyone and everything."

"Maybe you should just follow your instinct" Gandalf replied quietly.

"That's what you suggest me to do, to run away?" Thorin said with a sarcastic laugh. That sounded so absurd, and very unlikely to solve his problems.

"Sometimes you need to take a step back to decide which path to choose" the wizard said with an enigmatic smile.

Dwalin awoke with a start, blinking around confusedly. His first thought was to punch some sense into whoever had dared to wake him up in the middle from a peaceful, well-earned rest after having been on watch for two nights in a row. That warg attack had troubled him deeply, and he had kept a watchful eye on the area despite having sent lookouts, refusing to sleep until he was entirely sure that it was safe for them to stay here.

His lack of sleep also had to do with a certain someone whose deep blue gaze would haunt his thoughts whenever he close his eyes. He was even more puzzled to find said blue eyes staring straight into his own. He blinked again to make sure he wasn't dreaming, and frowned when he noticed the determination in Thorin's eyes.

The younger dwarf silently stood up and indicated with a tilt of his head that he expected the warrior to follow him. Dwalin's frowned deepened but he followed the younger dwarf nonetheless. The guard's mouth opened in shock when Thorin stopped in front of two ponies.

"What are you doing?" the warrior whispered, even though they were far enough from the camp for anyone to be able to hear him.

"Running away" Thorin replied quietly. Dwalin stared at him in shock.

"Have you lost your mind?"

"I am running away" Thorin said again, looking away for fear of seeing hurt and incomprehension on the guard's face.

"Why? Where to?" Dwalin exclaimed, not believing what he had just heard.

"It doesn't matter" Thorin replied, looking up to stare at the other dwarf with a mix of sadness and determination. "I'm running away and you are going with me."

Dwalin stared at him in shock for a second before bursting into laughter.

"You really are a strange one" he said still chuckling. "Why would I want to follow you?"

"Because I am a prince, and I cannot wander into wilderness alone. I need a guard, and I have chosen you."

Thorin jumped on his pony without waiting for an answer and stared at Dwalin expectantly. The warrior sighed and mounted the other pony, resignedly following the younger dwarf. He had a bad feeling about this; running away in the middle of the night couldn't be a good idea by any stretch of the imagination, but he kept quiet for the moment being. At least Thorin hadn't decided to run away alone.

They rode for a few hours in silence, determined to put as much distance as possible between them and the camp before sunrise. It was almost dawn when Thorin decided to make a short pause and rest their mounts before continuing any further. Dwalin lit a small fire and Thorin sat down anxiously waiting for the warrior to start questioning him. Surprisingly the guard remained silent, gazing at the fire thoughtfully. The younger dwarf stole a furtive glance at him from time to time, but the guard would send him a blank gaze and shrug.

"You can talk to me if you want to" Thorin said somewhat bitterly after a while. As much as he had been dreading having to explain his crazy idea to the guard he found out that Dwalin's silence was even worse, and he still hadn't spoken a single word to him since they had left the camp.

"I don't mind you asking me questions, I know you want to" he added when the warrior looked at him questioningly.

"Fine" Dwalin said with a sigh. "Why didn't you tell me your real name when we first met?"

Thorin stared at him totally taken aback. That was one question he hadn't been expecting, and the accusing glare the warrior sent him made him uncomfortable.

"I didn't know who I really was back then" Thorin said quietly. "Not that I know more now" he added bitterly. "But that doesn't change anything, I don't expect you to treat me like royalty."

"Maybe you don't, but others do" Dwalin replied with a stern glance.

"What does it matter, there isn't anyone here to judge us" Thorin said looking intently at the other dwarf. Dwalin held his gaze and nodded slowly, deep in thought, wondering just how much those words were supposed to mean.

"I think Balin knew from the start who you were" Dwalin said quietly. "Or at least he had suspicions. I didn't even recognize you" he said with a chuckle. "But then you've changed a lot."

"What do you mean?" Thorin asked, frowning. "We haven't met before."

"We have, but you were too young to remember" Dwalin said with a smile. "My father was Prince Thrain's personal guard, as well as his advisor and closest friend. He trusted him with his life, and it was only logical that he would choose his sons as playmates for the little prince."

"Does this mean that we played together as children?" Thorin asked incredulously, a little smile appearing on his lips at that thought.

"We did" Dwalin replied. "And you were quite a princely brat as far as I remember" Dwalin said with a chuckle. "You always wanted everyone to obey your every whim and you would start screaming and crying every time I disagreed with you. You would always make me play the orc and you always wanted to be the dwarf king."

"And you would let me?" Thorin said quietly, shuffling closer to the other dwarf.

"I did, at least the first few times." Dwalin turned to meet Thorin's gaze, staring at him intensely. "Until I had enough and decided to give you a real reason to cry."

Thorin chuckled and looked away, shaking his head. He could totally imagine a younger Dwalin, kind and caring to those he loved, but always ready to use his fists to make a point if necessary.

"I didn't recognize you right away, but there was that strange feeling when you were around, like I had known you forever. Now I know where it came from."

Their arms accidentally touched and they both looked away, embarrassed even though it was only a brief contact.

"Balin told me about your father's death" Thorin said softly. "I'm sorry."

Dwalin nodded slowly, looking suddenly sad, making Thorin regret having mentioned this.

"He was a brave warrior, and he died in honor. He had an undying loyalty to your father; he died defending him. He took a deathly blow that was meant for the prince."

"I'm sorry" Thorin repeated, shuddering when his hand made contact with the warrior's bigger one. He hadn't even noticed his own hand reaching out for the other dwarf, and he pulled away, blushing lightly. Dwalin remained silent for a while, gazing at the fire.

"I wouldn't mind dying like that" he said quietly. "I think I could give my life to protect someone" he added thoughtfully.

"Don't make it sound like it's something heroic" Thorin said with a snort. "It is a guard's duty to protect his king."

"It is" Dwalin replied with a serious expression. "But that doesn't make it any less of a honorable death, especially if said prince is also a friend."

Thorin looked away, nodding slowly at those words, deep in thought.

"Balin will certainly be livid when he finds out that you disappeared" Dwalin suddenly said.

"I know. Bilbo will not be happy either" Thorin replied with a sigh. He could imagine how worried the hobbit would be when he couldn't find the young dwarf anywhere.

"I thought you didn't care about him" Dwalin said with a questioning gaze.

"Of course I do, he is my father" Thorin replied defensively. "But I have had enough of everyone keeping secrets from me, I don't trust him anymore."

Dwalin nodded in silence, not wishing to push it any further since it was still a sensitive topic for Thorin.

"We should move on" the warrior finally said, rising to his feet to pack up their things. He watched as Thorin nodded and went to get the ponies, walking slowly, almost resignedly.

"Where are you taking us?" the young prince asked as he mounted his pony, handing the other one's reigns to Dwalin.

"Somewhere where no one will ever find you" the guard replied with a mysterious smile. Thorin opened his mouth to say something but closed it again when he realized that he didn't really care where they were going, as long as he would be away from both Hobbits and his kind.

"That orc pack you encountered in the forest was far too close to our camp for my liking, obviously we have been staying here for too long. This place isn't safe anymore, we need to move soon. Make it known to our people that we will be leaving tomorrow at first light."

The young guard nodded; however there was a frown on his face.

"Where to, my lord?"

"Further to the West, I suppose" Balin replied with a sigh. "We will find somewhere safe to build our new home" he added with a smile when he noticed the guard's shoulders slump in defeat.

The guard nodded slowly and was about to leave when Balin called him back.

"Find the young Prince, make sure that he is safe" he said quickly. "Where is your captain?"

"I don't know, my lord. I haven't seen him since earlier in the evening."

"See if you can find him, I need him to help prepare our departure."

The young guard nodded and bowed shortly before taking his leave.

"Master Balin?"

The counselor jumped in surprise, his expression softening when he spotted the Hobbit standing nearby, looking unsure.

"You Hobbits truly are surprising creatures, walking around so quietly. I didn't even hear you approach" Balin said with a soft smile. However Bilbo's worried expression caused him to frown.

"Is something wrong?" he asked softly. The Hobbit looked away, obviously agitated. Balin's frown deepened when he saw that Bilbo's hands were slightly shaking.

"Thorin still refuses to talk to me" Bilbo admitted with a sad sigh. "I haven't seen him since we arrived here, he has been avoiding me all the time. I didn't even get a chance to ask him how his reunion with the king went" he said in a broken voice.

"It was undoubtedly a shock for him. Give him some time, he will come around eventually."

"I sincerely doubt that he will" Bilbo said somewhat bitterly. "He has another family now, why would he need me anymore?"

Balin let out a loud sigh, offering the Hobbit a sad smile. The counselor sat down near the fire, motioning for the Hobbit to do the same.

"It was bound to happen" Bilbo said after a moment of silence. "I knew I would lose him when time would come for him to meet other dwarves. I can hardly blame him for that though, I would have probably acted the same way if it had been the other way around. I can't imagine spending the rest of my life amongst dwarves, it's only natural that Thorin would never want to stay in the Shire."

There was a bittersweet sadness in his voice that almost made Balin reach out for a comforting touch but he decided against it and let Bilbo go through with his thoughts. The Hobbit was surprised to feel somewhat better now that the words were out. It didn't ease the aching in his heart but it seemed clearer now that he had said it, like an evidence that he could no longer keep denying.

"We will be leaving tomorrow in the morning" Balin said softly so as not to startle Bilbo out of his thoughts. "We need to find a safe place for our people. However I promise you that I will escort you back to the Shire and see that you return safely to your home. You are lucky enough to have a home, and you should make the best of it and go on with your life. You are a kind and caring person Master Baggins, and I would rather know you are safe and well in the Shire than have you accompany a bunch of homeless dwarves wandering the wilderness."

Bilbo looked genuinely surprised by those words even though he had been thinking of going back home even since he had first left the Shire. Balin was right, obviously he didn't belong here with them, and as sad as he was to leave them to fend for themselves there wasn't much a Hobbit could do to help them.

"That is a very kind offer, and I wasn't expecting any less from you" Bilbo said after thinking it over for a couple of short minutes. "I think it is indeed time that we go back home."

His face spontaneously lit up and a small smile appeared on his face at the mention of home. The smile vanished in an instant when he saw the frown on the dwarf's face.

"I think it would be best if you left Thorin here with us" Balin said carefully. Bilbo opened his mouth to protest, to tell the counselor that he would never leave without his son but the calm resolution on Balin's face made him close his mouth again, staring at the dwarf in silent shock.

"Your place is in the Shire, leaving a peaceful life amongst your kind, just like it is Thorin's place to be here. He belongs amongst us" Balin said with a determined tone in his voice.

"He didn't tell me anything about wanting to stay" Bilbo said with a frown. There was something unusual about Balin's usually calm and friendly behavior, something that Bilbo couldn't quite define.

"You two haven't been too close recently" Balin said matter of factly, offering the Hobbit a comforting smile. Bilbo could only manage a small nod, the lump in his throat keeping him for uttering a single word.

"I am sure he meant to tell you, but he feared your reaction. He knew his decision would hurt you, which is why I suggested to him that I would talk to you. It is not easy for him to have to tell you this, Mater Baggins. Thorin cares for you and loves you like a son would love his father, but it is time for him to follow his own path. He wants to be amongst his kin, and I can assure you that he will be looked after like someone of his rank deserves to be."

"I can't just leave like this" Bilbo said shaking his head, fighting back the tears that were threatening to fall. "I can't abandon him to a life of wandering, I have to talk to him, convince him to come with me" Bilbo said resolutely, already standing up to go in search of his son. Balin's gentle but firm hand held him back, making the Hobbit narrow his eyes at the dwarf suspiciously.

"He cannot be happy in the Shire, we both know this" Balin said softly. "You have to let him go."

Bilbo lowered his gaze, unable to speak. Of course Balin was right, Bilbo himself had been aware of Thorin's happiness for some time yet it seemed he still wasn't ready to accept it. As much as he knew that it was every child's destiny to eventually leave his parents and live his own life he couldn't quite accept that this was exactly what was about to happen.

There was a special bond between him and his adopted son, a bond that the lonely bachelor in him had never thought he would experience that day. He had found Thorin as a baby in the middle of nowhere, he had cared for him and looked after him, taking him in while he was usually so suspicious and distrustful towards strangers. The dwarfling's arrival in his life had awoken in him a will to take care of that little dwarf he had come to consider as his own, to protect him from everything evil in this world. And deep in his heart he knew that this would never disappear.

"Can I at least say my goodbyes to my son?" he said in a weak, broken voice, but the dwarf only shook his head.

"Don't make this harder for either of you. Besides it is not farewell yet, you will see him again, I can promise you that, and I will make sure that you hear from him regularly."

The dwarf's grip on Bilbo's arm relaxed until it was nothing more than a gentle, comforting touch. "Trust me Master Baggins, this is best for both you and Thorin."