Alistair
It had been over two months since I had seen her last. All Void had broken loose shortly after I had left. Reports that were coming in were spotty and insane to say the least. I was desperate to find her, but she and her companions seemed to have vanished amidst the chaos that surrounded the mage rebellion. That if rumors were true, she had lead.
"Have they found anything? Any sign of her?" I asked Teagan as he walked with me to my rooms. It had been a long day of fighting amongst the nobles in the Landsmeet. All of Thedas was turned upside down by what had happened in Kirkwall. Meredith was dead. Most of the mages too. The ones who had escaped were spreading the rebellion to the other Circles. The templars and Chantry were at odds with each other. Now was not the time for the nobles to start whining again, but they were.
"Not a clue. She'll turn up, Alistair. I'm sure she's fine. She's tough." Teagan reassured me as we entered my rooms.
"I'm not so sure she'll come here. She won't want to bring the trouble here. I'm afraid she'll think I don't want her here. Teagan, we have to find her. The Prince of Starkhaven is already gathering his forces to start hunting her. I need to know she's safe."
"I've sent word to Zevran. He's agreed to start hunting for her. His taking over the Crows was a stroke of luck for us." Teagan squeezed my arm quickly. "We will find her, Alistair." I nodded as he turned and headed for the door. "Try and get some rest. Eamon will handle the nobles tomorrow. How about we slip out to the tavern while he handles the nobles. Oghren's in town."
"Maybe." I sighed. I didn't want to go to the taverns. I wanted Eliana. I needed to know she was alright. Teagan didn't say anything farther. He just shut the door behind him and left me to my misery. I pulled off my gauntlets and slammed them on the table.
"Where in the Maker's name are you, Eliana?" I demanded to the empty room angrily. She had promised to come to me, but it had been a month since the Gallows fell in Kirkwall. More than enough time for her to have made her way back to me.
"I'm right here, Alistair." She said stepping out of the shadows. She raised her eyebrow at me. "And I will say that your security is sorely lacking. I had no issues getting in here unseen."
"Eliana?" I whispered. Was she a mirage I had cooked up do to missing her so much? Was this a dream? I moved closer to her.
"It's me, Alistair. I'm so sorry." She whispered and touched my cheek lightly. "I never meant for any of this to happen. Please let me try to explain before you summon the guards."
"Eliana, you're here. You're really here!" I crushed her to me and spun her around. I kissed her soundly before I pulled her to the couch. "Where have you been? I've been so worried." I sat us down and wrapped my arms around her. She pulled out of them and moved to the other end of the couch.
"Please don't do that. Don't make this harder."
"Make what harder? What's wrong?" I asked worriedly. She was going to say she didn't love me. She was going to walk away from me. I was going to lose her. I could see it written on her face.
"I'm so sorry, Alistair. I wouldn't have come at all, but I need a favor."
"You…but you said you loved me. You promised you would come back to me." I whispered unable to help it. I didn't want to hurt her, but Maker I was hurting.
She hung her head and closed her eyes. "I do love you, Alistair. That's why I wouldn't have come. I can't bring my mess down on your head. I wouldn't ask anything of you if it wasn't for the others. They didn't ask to be pulled into this mess. I have to make sure they're safe. Then, I'll make sure you're safe. The only way I can do that is to stay far away from you."
I caught her hand. She still loved me. Nothing else mattered but that. We could survive whatever so long as she loved me. "I'll protect you. And your friends. Stay with me."
She shook her head. "You can't, Alistair. It would bring war to Ferelden."
"What happened?" I asked. Her eyes filled with tears and I curled her into my arms.
"It's so awful. I can't believe he put me in that position. I can't believe what happened. I tried to stop it. I tried to stop all of it, but no one would listen. No one would calm down. And then Anders…"
"Did he really blow up the Chantry?" I asked. She nodded and curled into me more.
"He tricked me into helping him do it. He said it was a potion to help him. I didn't believe him when he said the final part involved something in the Chantry, but when I pressed he accused me of not trusting him. Of not meaning what I had said all these years. He used my friendship against me. I felt guilty for questioning him and then he did that. He…all those people…Elthina was a good woman. She would have calmed things down. But he…he said nothing would change without force. And then they made me chose sides. Meredith would have killed all the mages. Every one of them for Anders' actions. I couldn't let her do that. So I sided with the mages. Sebastian tried to make me kill Anders, but I couldn't do it. He needed to try and help save the mages since it was his fault they were under attack. He's still my friend. I couldn't just kill him. I…I failed everyone, Alistair. I can't be near you now. I shouldn't have come, but the others need a safe place to go. I…it's wrong to presume, but I hoped you wouldn't hate me completely and might have mercy on them. They were innocent in this." She turned to me with tearstained cheeks and pleading eyes.
"Anything you need." I promised. "I don't hate you or blame you. I would have done the same thing in your shoes. I agreed to the ritual to spare both Aedan and myself after all."
"Yes, but you didn't take part in it. Alistair, I took part in the rebellion. I just wanted to make my sister and mother safe, but I keep failing. I never wanted to be pulled into this mess, and I just keep making things worse." She shook her head and stood up. She began to pace, nervously toying with my mother's amulet. I wanted to hold her, but I knew she needed some space. "Can you find a position for Bethany and Merrill? Bethany is a talented mage who is skilled in healing. Merrill is a…well, she's dabbled in blood magic, but hopefully has learned the error of her ways. She can't return to the Dalish or she'll be killed. She's a quick study though and loves to be helpful."
"I have no problem with that. We can find places for them. As a Dalish I would imagine she is good with nature stuff, right?" Eli nodded to me. "Then Teagan could use her in Redcliffe. Their vineyards and apple orchards could use a hand. And I would love to have Bethany here at the palace. I can always use healers."
"Thank you, Alistair. It is more than I dared hope for. But I have more to ask." She bit her lip.
"Ask it. So long as it is in my power, it is yours." I promised.
"Aveline and Donnic. Can they join your army? They are brilliant guards. And from what I've seen, you are desperately in need of some help. Really, Alistair, I scaled a wall in broad daylight and jimmied one lock to enter the king's bedroom." She shook her head and sighed.
"I would love to have them back. As you pointed out I could use with some new guards. I've been having a bit of trouble finding personal guards I can trust. I could use them as my personal guards." I nodded to her.
"And Orana? She's so sweet and timid, but a hard worker."
"I have missed her sticky buns. She can have a job here. Whatever she wants to do. Especially if it comes with me getting sticky buns occasionally."
"She likes you very much. She would love to make you sticky buns. She needs watching over. She still thinks she's a slave and will do as anyone tells her to. I want to make sure she's going to be taken care of, not taken advantage of."
"She will have my protection." I promised. She took a deep breath and nodded.
"There is one last favor I must ask." She turned and looked at me.
"What about the rest of you? Varric? Fenris? Isabela? Anders?" I left off the her because I couldn't bear it if she said she was leaving.
"Varric's going to Orlais for a while. Fenris and Isabela are taking her ship and sailing off. And Anders and I are going to disappear." She gave me a sad look. "I can't abandon him now, and to stay in one place would put us and those around us at risk."
"Eliana, stay with me. I will protect you all. Sebastian will not be allowed to cross our boarders. And you don't have to worry about the templars either." I got up and moved to her. I cupped her cheek and tilted her head up to me. "Stay with me. Marry me."
She looked away from me. "I can't. I won't bring this down on you or Ferelden. But it does make what I'm going to ask you now easier." She looked up at me and took a steadying breath. "I'm going to leave, but I'll be back in about seven months, give or take." I frowned at her in confusion.
"Seven months?"
"And when I come back, you'll need to have a wet nurse ready."
"A wet nurse?" I was growing more confused. Why would she need a wet nurse?
"I'm going to come back with a baby, Alistair. I hope…I pray you will take care of it, but if you can't or don't want to, please let me know. I couldn't bear the thought of the child growing up thinking that neither of us wanted it. If you don't want it, I will find someone who will."
"A baby?" I sat down on the back of the couch and looked at her in question. Her eyes were full of tears. She nodded slowly. "We…our baby?"
"Yes." She whispered. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean for it to happen. I know you need an heir so I'm hoping if nothing else you will keep the baby for that reason."
"You don't want our child?" I asked stunned. I was going to have a child. I hadn't dared to even go down that road. I had feared the Warden taint would make it impossible. And now she was saying she was leaving it. She was leaving me and our child.
Her hand went protectively to her stomach. "More than anything I want this child, but I won't subject it to the life I'll have to live. Alistair, there is a good chance the child will be a mage. Mages run in both sides of my family. I'm sorry."
"I don't care what our child is so long as they are healthy. Don't leave me. Don't leave us. Marry me, Eli. Let's raise the baby together and in safety. Aedan will take Anders as his healer. Together we can keep you all safe. Please don't leave me." I begged pulling her to me.
"Alistair, I can't. I don't want to put you in danger. I don't want our child in danger." She shook her head.
"But it will be. If you are on the run, the baby will be as well. Here you would have healers. The best of everything at your hand. Stay with me."
"Alistair, the people will never allow you to marry me. I've caused too much trouble. The rebellions…" I cut her off with a kiss. She was already caving. I could see it.
"They will welcome you. You will find that Ferelden is behind the Champion. We know about all the things you did to help the refugees there, and the things you did to help Ferelden as well. I have already proven to be an ally to mages. There are many here seeking sanctuary. The land will be behind you." I kissed her as she started to protest again. "And more importantly, I'm behind you. I'm the king. And Aedan will be as well. With the weight of the king and the hero of Ferelden behind you, none would dare say anything else."
"Alistair, think about this. You don't want to do something to hurt the land. Allying your self with me could do that." I kissed her again and lead her back to the couch.
"Then I will call another Landsmeet tomorrow and speak with them all. You will see I'm right. So where are the other so we can get you all settled?"
"They're in Amaranthine. The bann there owed me. I'm supposed to send word if it was alright and they would sail to Denerim. Are you sure about this? I mean I can disappear. I'm good at running."
"I want you to be good at staying. We're going to have a baby. Eli, I never dared to dream I would ever find love, much less have a child. And now I have found both. I don't want to lose you, Eliana. You feared before was just me caught up in the romance of the moment, but now I'm not. Marry me, Eliana."
She curled into my arms and wrapped hers around my chest. "I love you, Alistair. But we can't decide that right now. You want to protect me, but I need to protect you as well. I've lost nearly everyone I've ever loved, Alistair. If I did something to hurt you…if I lost you…" She trailed off and cried. I held her until she calmed.
"Then marry me. They will accept you, or they will have to find a new king."
"Alistair, don't say that." She shook her head.
"It's true. Marry me."
She gave me a teasing look, but I saw through it. She was trying to distract me rather than argue. "You said that you would ask properly next time. So you can't ask me right now. Speak with Teagan and Eamon about this before you do something rash. Call your Landsmeet. And then…"
"And then you will agree to marry me." I said and carried her towards the bed.
"If you ask right, maybe." She smiled at me as I sat her down.
"I see how you want to be. I'll get it out of you yet. My shirts are in that chest there. The bathing chamber is through there. Make yourself at home here. I'm going to go and speak with Teagan. When I get back you best be here. I'll bring food and we'll send word to your companions. Promise me you will be here."
"I promise." She said after a few moments. "Alistair, I love you. More than anything. But I won't let that love tear Ferelden apart."
"And I won't let them take another thing from me." I said and closed the door behind me. I could only hope she would still be there. She had promised. I would trust her word. A baby. We were going to have a baby. I felt like skipping I was so happy. I hurried through the castle hunting down Teagan. I knew he would be on my side. Eamon was going to be another matter entirely. I stopped a passing servant and asked them to send for Aedan and Fergus. I was going to need all the support I could get.