Chapter 10 - One un-koolies Geography dude
Disclaimer: I don't own the characters or Lord of the Rings. Or any kangaroos, for that matter... shut up brain...
This chapter wasn't actually in my original version of the story, but I thought it would be koolies to add! Thanx for de reviews!
Kandalf jumped off her tamed kangaroo at the gates of Diehard, the residence of Sarumeanie. Sarumeanie was the head of the Geography Society, and knew much about history. He also had an electronic whiteboard pen, which he treasured above all other things.
She went up to the tall tower. Down the fireman's pole came sliding Sarumeanie.
"Welcome Kandalf," said Sarumeanie, "What are you doing here?"
"Came to ask for advice," said Kandalf, "Can I come in?"
"If you can get back up this," said Sarumeanie, glancing at the pole.
After not a little difficulty, Kandalf reached Sarumeanie's inner sanctum. "So what do you want to ask?"
"Well," said Kandalf, "The Thing of Power had been found."
"Groovy," said Sarumeanie.
"Um, well, that wasn't quite my reaction..." said Kandalf, "I was a bit more worried that Moron could return."
"Oh yeah, BIG problem," said Sarumeanie, "So what do you want us to do? Send in weapon's inspectors?"
"Nah - if they're anything like the guys I know, they'll never find anything. I've given it to Clodo Leggings, to take to Free. She's going to meet me there."
Sarumeanie laughed. "Hahaha... oh, that's funny. Haven't heard a joke as good as that for a long time. Actually, I did hear one about an elf, a dwarf and a hobbit..."
"I wasn't joking."
"Are you serious?" said Sarumeanie, "You've sent one fobbit - with hardly any brain - against Moron?"
"Maybe..."
"KANDALF?"
"OK, yes! But we might still have time."
"I doubt it somehow," sighed Sarumeanie, "The Nine passed here a few nights ago."
"The Nine?" gasped Kandalf, "Nine what?"
Sarumeanie sighed with despair. "Wombles."
"Oh, KOOLIES!"
"I've heard that Topshop just sold out of boots and leather jackets. And that Claire's Accessories is out of mascara."
"OH NO!" said Kandalf, "Its - the THINGCHAVS!"
"Well, duh," said Sarumeanie, "Unless of course Uncle Bulgaria has started reading Cosmo. Kandalf - we must join Moron."
"That's a bit fast," said Kandalf, "Aren't you supposed to be all pessimistic first?"
"Well, yeah, but I've got appointment at two thirty. So whaddya say?"
Kandalf thought. Being on the side of the one true evil of the world would look good on her universtiy application... "No," she said, "Moron is pure evil. Whatever good she does always turns to bad. What light-hearted world could there be without light?"
"You just don't want to lose chocolate."
"That's neither here nor there," said Kandalf, "No."
"That's it," said Sarumeanie, getting a tad mad, "First you fall asleep in Geography. Then you refuse point blank to take Geography for GCSE. Now you won't help me take over the world? What is the MATTER with you?"
"Geography's boring. I only do it to fulfil the Skill section in my Duke of Fondue award."
Sarumeanie was now REEEEALLY pissed off. "Well," said Sarumeanie, "I'll just lock you up in some horrid place until you change your mind."
"Aw, won't you let me go? I won't tell anyone, I promise." She blinked angelically. Five minutes later, she was hopping away from Diehard on her kangaroo.
Disclaimer: I don't own the characters or Lord of the Rings. Or any kangaroos, for that matter... shut up brain...
This chapter wasn't actually in my original version of the story, but I thought it would be koolies to add! Thanx for de reviews!
Kandalf jumped off her tamed kangaroo at the gates of Diehard, the residence of Sarumeanie. Sarumeanie was the head of the Geography Society, and knew much about history. He also had an electronic whiteboard pen, which he treasured above all other things.
She went up to the tall tower. Down the fireman's pole came sliding Sarumeanie.
"Welcome Kandalf," said Sarumeanie, "What are you doing here?"
"Came to ask for advice," said Kandalf, "Can I come in?"
"If you can get back up this," said Sarumeanie, glancing at the pole.
After not a little difficulty, Kandalf reached Sarumeanie's inner sanctum. "So what do you want to ask?"
"Well," said Kandalf, "The Thing of Power had been found."
"Groovy," said Sarumeanie.
"Um, well, that wasn't quite my reaction..." said Kandalf, "I was a bit more worried that Moron could return."
"Oh yeah, BIG problem," said Sarumeanie, "So what do you want us to do? Send in weapon's inspectors?"
"Nah - if they're anything like the guys I know, they'll never find anything. I've given it to Clodo Leggings, to take to Free. She's going to meet me there."
Sarumeanie laughed. "Hahaha... oh, that's funny. Haven't heard a joke as good as that for a long time. Actually, I did hear one about an elf, a dwarf and a hobbit..."
"I wasn't joking."
"Are you serious?" said Sarumeanie, "You've sent one fobbit - with hardly any brain - against Moron?"
"Maybe..."
"KANDALF?"
"OK, yes! But we might still have time."
"I doubt it somehow," sighed Sarumeanie, "The Nine passed here a few nights ago."
"The Nine?" gasped Kandalf, "Nine what?"
Sarumeanie sighed with despair. "Wombles."
"Oh, KOOLIES!"
"I've heard that Topshop just sold out of boots and leather jackets. And that Claire's Accessories is out of mascara."
"OH NO!" said Kandalf, "Its - the THINGCHAVS!"
"Well, duh," said Sarumeanie, "Unless of course Uncle Bulgaria has started reading Cosmo. Kandalf - we must join Moron."
"That's a bit fast," said Kandalf, "Aren't you supposed to be all pessimistic first?"
"Well, yeah, but I've got appointment at two thirty. So whaddya say?"
Kandalf thought. Being on the side of the one true evil of the world would look good on her universtiy application... "No," she said, "Moron is pure evil. Whatever good she does always turns to bad. What light-hearted world could there be without light?"
"You just don't want to lose chocolate."
"That's neither here nor there," said Kandalf, "No."
"That's it," said Sarumeanie, getting a tad mad, "First you fall asleep in Geography. Then you refuse point blank to take Geography for GCSE. Now you won't help me take over the world? What is the MATTER with you?"
"Geography's boring. I only do it to fulfil the Skill section in my Duke of Fondue award."
Sarumeanie was now REEEEALLY pissed off. "Well," said Sarumeanie, "I'll just lock you up in some horrid place until you change your mind."
"Aw, won't you let me go? I won't tell anyone, I promise." She blinked angelically. Five minutes later, she was hopping away from Diehard on her kangaroo.