~ Indention of the Heart ~
Chapter 10
ThatPanicGirlE

A/N: Sorry to leave you with a cliffie. I tried my hardest to have this written so you wouldn't be left like that for long.

JasperPOV

She looked worse than it actually was. Her arm was in a cast. Her face was bumped and bruised and she was going to have knee problems. She had broken ribs and was bandaged to hell and back. Luckily for her she didn't break anything else but it was bad enough for her to still be unconscious. I felt so helpless and it wasn't fair that Bella had to go through this. She's already gone through enough.

I sat in the chair next to her and watched her sleep. I wanted her to open her eyes so bad and let me know she was okay. I wanted to hold her and tell her it would be.

Every breath she took seemed painful. I watched as her heart monitor beeped and the drips of her IV seemed so loud. The rest of the hospital was so quiet.

"Charlie, she'll be fine," Dr. Cullen said as he reassured her dad. I watched as he ran his fingers through his hair, worried to death about his only daughter. "When will she wake up?" I overheard him ask.

"She'll wake when her body's ready. It's like a natural reaction for her mind to shut down after that kind of trauma. It'll keep her from being in so much pain."

Charlie shook his head. He walked back in the door. I looked up at him and went to stand for him to sit down.

"No, no Jasper, you can sit. I can't sit still long enough. Thank you for being here with her. You have no idea help this is."

"Anything I can do to help," I said.

He paced back and forth in the room and it was starting to make me nervous. "Charlie, why don't you get some coffee? You'll ware a hole in the floor pacing like that."

He shook his head. "You do have a point there. I'll be right back, if she wakes have the nurse page me."

I smiled and shook my head.

I looked over at her belongings in a neat pile in the closet. They had to cut her clothes off her and Charlie had to bring more clothes for her to go home in. I just hope she can go home soon.

I crouched down in the chair. You would think if you have to sit next to the person you love in a hospital, they'd at least make you comfortable.

I thought about what would have had her out like that late at night. It seemed like it would be so unlike her to just drive down that road, especially during a storm that bad.

I stood up to stretch my legs and as I walked around the room, I did what every single human wants to do in a room – I looked through all the drawers. The cabinets amazed me. I wondered what they used half that crap in those plastic bags and shuddered at the thought of it. I closed the cabinet and went to folding Bella's clothes.

As I pulled a shirt from a pile a blue envelope fell out of it.

It looked eerily familiar and when I flipped it to the front, I saw my handwriting with the words, "Isabella" on the front.

My jaw dropped wide open. I opened the envelope to make sure my eyes weren't deceiving me and sure enough inside the envelope was the letter I wrote Bella in high school.

"What the…?"

It hit me that maybe she did have the letter all along and chose to ignore it for the love of Edward. If that was the case, then why did she hold on to it? Why did she have it on her when she wrecked?

I heard her whimper and I looked over to the bed to see her wriggling around.

"Bella," I gasped. I ran to her side and as she woke, she groggily looked in my direction.

"Jasper, what happened?"

"You were in a bad wreck," I said.

"All I remember is the rain, the truck," she whispered.

I got up briefly to let the nurse know she was awake. She came in to take vitals and I asked for her to page Bella's dad like I promised.

"Well you are okay now, you're in the hospital and they're getting you fixed up, I promise."

She lifted her good arm and her fingertips caressed my cheek. "How long have I been out?"

"At least two days. You had me so worried Bella."

She dropped her hand and then squirmed a little.

She noticed the envelope in my hand still.

"Wow, they were able to keep that for me?" she said with a slight smile.

"Where did you get this?" I asked.

"I …" she took a deep swallow and I got her a glass of water. She took a sip.

"I found it in some of Rosalie's high school stuff."

Rosalie. What the hell was Rosalie doing with it?

"I asked her about it and she freaked out and ran out of the room. She wouldn't tell me anything about it," she whispered.

"Well, we can talk about it later," I said so she could get some more rest.

"Thanks Jasper… and I… Love…"

She fell back asleep and I was suddenly more awake than I had ever been.

Bella was in love with me. It was a pretty shitty way to find out but nonetheless Bella was in love with me. Or at least I hoped that was what she was going to say to me.

Charlie bolted through the door. He looked disappointed.

"She's okay Charlie. She woke up briefly. I think the pain medication has her sleepy. I need to step out of the hospital for a while. Can you take a rotation?" I asked him.

"Sure Jasper, you've done more than enough. Take a break."

"Thanks I said," as I patted him on the back.

I walked out the hospital with a mission. I needed to know why Rosalie had the envelope.

-----

I drove up the driveway of Emmett and Rosalie's estate and I had to approach this carefully. If I upset Rosalie, Emmett would have my ass. But I needed to know the truth.

I rang the doorbell and Emmett came to the door.

"Hey man, how's Bella?"

"She just woke up a little bit ago but I need to talk to Rosalie if at all possible."

"Sure, she's in the living room."

"Thanks man."

I walked past Emmett and into the living room. Rosalie was propped up watching TV.

"Hey Jazz, how's Bella?"

"She's fine. But I need to talk to you about something, and please Rose, tell me the truth."

She looked a little uneasy. "It's about the letter isn't it?"

"Yeah, actually it is. Where did you get it?"

"Take a seat Jasper. I'll tell you everything." She lifted her feet for me to take a seat and as I did she put her feet back on me. She's lucky that I loved her like a sister or else this would have made me annoyed.

"Bella never got the letter. Edward intercepted it before she had a chance to read it."

That motherfucker. I knew he had something to do with it.

"Edward came to me one afternoon upset as hell about your letter. He wanted to ring your neck and I had to calm him down."

"So you kept this letter from me for all these years? How is that fair to me or Bella, Rosalie?"

"I did it because Edward asked me to. He's Emmett's brother. I did it because he made me promise to never speak of it again. Bella found it the other night and I feel awful. I feel like I caused that wreck."

She began to sob and I felt awful. I didn't want Rosalie to feel at fault for anything. She was just sticking to her word and promise to Edward.

I got up and knelt down beside her. I grabbed her hand and said, "Rose, I don't blame you. You were only keeping your word. Don't worry about it. I just needed to know."

She sniffled some more. "So you aren't angry with me?"

"Of course I'm not. I'm angrier with Edward. He seems to find ways to fuck things up for people. I think it's time for me to share more words with him."

"Jasper, please, don't do anything stupid. Edward is still in love with Bella and if you do something, I'm sure he'll find a way to make you look like the bad guy. He did that the last time. After he found the letter, he filled Bella's head with all kinds of things. He told her that you were really not that great of a guy. I'm shocked she didn't remember that."

I was then royally pissed. Edward was so fucking manipulative and yet he got the girl the first time. Not this time. This time, he was going to have to sit on the sidelines while Bella and I shared our happiness.

EdwardPOV

"Who as at the door," I asked as I rounded the corner.

"Wrong house. So where were we? Oh yes. Take a seat Edward."

I sat down on the chair next to her and as she sat on the couch, Victoria placed her glass of red wine on the coffee table.

"I don't normally drink on the job, but this is too good of a year to pass up," the red haired psychologist said.

"So, Edward, tell me, why did you call me?"

She pulled a pen out of her bag and began taking notes in a large yellow legal pad.

"I called you because I've been a horrible person. I feel like if I fix myself then I can get back the person, I mean people I love in my life."

She scribbled something down on her pad and continued to ask questions.

"So, this person or people – why do you feel the need to gain their affection? Why do you want them in your life if they couldn't accept you the way you are?"

I ran my fingers through my hair.

"I grew up in a family where everything was perfect. My mother was the mom of all moms. She kept a neat and tidy, organized household and my dad was the great doctor. I'm used to perfection. I loved Bella with every single ounce of my being and my strive for perfection is what drove us apart. I need help letting go of making everything perfect."

She wrote more notes down.

"Well Edward, after reviewing the questionnaire that I had you fill out a bit ago, I can see where this is going. It seems to me like you suffer from a form of narcissism."

"Whoa, wait a second. I'm in no way shape or form a narcissist."

She stood up and pointed at the perfectly arranged candles on the table next to me.

"Edward, I'm afraid you are wrong. You've brought along with you your mother's strive for perfection. It's almost a form of OCD. A place for everything and everything in its place. You wanted the same for Bella. You wanted her in "her place."

I looked at Victoria like she lost her mind. "I never wanted anything but happiness for Bella."

"Tell me more about her. What was she like? Did she have any hobbies? What were her career ambitions?"

She sat back down and placed her glasses back on and began writing again.

"She was a great wife. She was always gracious towards my friends and family and even my co-workers."

"Okay but, what about her life. What did she want out of life?"

"She wanted to be a teacher."

"And is she one now?"

I shook my head yes. "She finally got a job at Forks Highs School." I then realized I over accentuated the word "finally."

"I see. Did you have faith in your wife Edward? Did you push her towards excellence or did you let her find her own way?"

I started to see Bella's face after she brought home her final grade from college. She was so excited that she made a B-plus on her grade. I had a huge smile on my face.

Then my face quickly fell.

Bella, you'll never get a great teaching job with just a B-plus.

"I'm… oh my God. I'm a horrible person."

Victoria looked over her glasses at me.

"How are you a horrible person Edward?"

"All Bella wanted was a little encouragement and if it wasn't perfect I'd tell her she didn't try hard enough."

I put my head down into my hands. I quickly realized that all this time, I was in fact the worst person on this planet for the way I treated her. All she wanted was a little acceptance, a kind word and small amount of direction from me. She didn't need a husband who told her she wasn't good enough. I began to sob into my hands.

I heard Victoria click her pen and she stood up.

"Edward, I think you realize what you've done. My time here is up but I'll definitely need to schedule another appointment with you. You've made excellent progress with just one visit. I'm sure by next week you'll realize more things to make you a better person."

She handed me a tissue. I wiped the tears from my eyes. She then reached out a card to me.

"I've already scheduled your next appointment. I'll see you next week."

Victoria then grabbed her briefcase and shut the front door behind her as she walked out. I went to the kitchen and poured a glass of the same red wine Victoria was drinking. My iPhone began to vibrate in my pocket and it was Alice.

"Hello…"

"Oh thank God, Edward… its Bella… she's been in a horrible wreck."

I nearly dropped the phone but quickly caught it in my other hand.

"What do you mean?"

"She was coming back from your direction and hit a limb in the road. She's at the hospital right now. Oh God Edward she looks horrible."

Alice began to sob and I told her I was on my way. I grabbed my keys from the counter and ran out the door.

A/N2: I love it when people realize the mistakes they've made. Edward just finally realized that in fact he was a fuck up. Hopefully he'll learn to let things go. You'll just have to wait and see what happens next.

Huge thanks to the ladies at Team Fire and Ice (TeamFireAndIceFic: JenniP, cereuleanblue & Kennedymommy3) for their outstanding support. Huge thanks to AngstGoddess003 who will be working on our new fanfic site to hopefully publish soon.

Also, huge thanks to my sweetie, Mikey. He's been so patient with me tonight as I wrote this chapter. He's my rock, my salvation and my love.