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Comments: Uhhh. On with the story? Hee, hee?

What Becomes Of Snow

By,

DreamingFae

Hatori sighed closing his eyes and rubbing wearily at the back of his neck.

"Well then," he stated turning to face Yuki, his gaze solemn. "You seem to be in a better state of mind today so I'll leave this choice up to you."

Yuki gazed at the doctor warily and Kyo could see his body beginning to tense.

"I can sedate you—as I've been doing for this past week—while I treat and examine your injuries. Such a course of action may be…" he hesitated, "…easier… to carry out for the both of us. I don't recommend it though Yuki. I think it would be best for you to allow me to do this of your own free will, and thus begin on the road to recovery."

Hatori paused for a moment and Kyo sensed that he was choosing his words very carefully.

"Also, Kyo's presence is optional. Though he has been helping me thus far and would undoubtedly aid in this task running much ore smoothly, I can always call for someone else."

Kyo saw an almost invisible shudder run through Yuki's frame before Hatori went on, his gaze flickering to rest on the redhead.

"Really I don't know why or how it is that you are still here. The most obvious reason would have to be that Akito is not yet aware of your still being here."

There was a pause while Hatori waited for Yuki's response before finally the younger boy sighed shrugging his single good shoulder, a frown marring his features as if to say, 'what choice do I have?'

The doctor nodded once in confirmation before he went on.

"One last thing." Here Hatori's tone became, if possible, even more serious. "I have spoken with Akito about your current condition and have made the request that you be allowed to return to Shigure's home on the bases of a quicker and more complete recovery.

You must understand Yuki, if you don't already, that Akito is a very unbalanced man and many times doesn't realize the severity of his attacks. He was very distressed to learn of your condition."

Kyo snorted in disbelief.

"I am not saying this to excuse his actions," the doctor said firmly frowning briefly at Kyo. "I am merely trying to explain his lack of rationale. He doesn't wish for your death Yuki, you must believe this."

Yuki didn't respond verbally or otherwise and Hatori cleared his throat.

"In any case, he has agreed to let you return there under the condition that he see you once before you go."

Yuki seemed to curl into himself at the words.

"I don't think I have to explain to you that while such a course is unappealing, it is the lesser of two evils." Hatori said studying the silver-haired boy.

When Yuki again made no effort to respond, Hatori sighed running a hand through the pitch dark strands of his hair. "He'll come to see you anyway Yuki. At least use the inevitable to your advantage."

After a moment of silence during which it was apparent that Yuki wasn't going to answer back, the doctor stood and began gathering the things he would need to treat Yuki's various injuries stating;

"I'll let you think on it."

Then began the arduous, unforgiving task of cleaning, salving and bandaging.

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He hated it. The weakness that made him shiver and tremble violently as his wounds were exposed. He hated that his enemy was there to witness his weakness, and he hated himself for being unable to do anything about it.

But who else could be called to take the redhead's place?

Kureno was out of the question. He'd been Akito's right-hand man for as long as Yuki could remember, even having gone so far as to restrain Yuki himself anytime the boy'd been lucky enough to temporarily break free from Akito.

And he definitely wouldn't taint Haru or Momiji by allowing either of them to realize the atrocities that had been done to his body.

Really, then it came down to only Kyo who wasn't a much better choice than anyone else.

So he sat there painfully aware of just how weak he was. Just as Akito had told him countless times.

It was repulsive.

It didn't get any easier over time—living with himself, his pathetisism. He would know. He'd been living with it for over a decade. Ever since his mother had sold him to the head of the Souma's in exchange for a more prominent position among the family.

It hadn't taken him long to realize that no one was going to help him. Akito was feared by all even when he hadn't been much older than the child Yuki himself.

At the time, he'd thought that his life was at its worst. He was always kept inside, away from the other children and under constant supervision.

Akito was cruel, using his words to tear into Yuki's young unguarded soul, and fists and braided whips to torture him physically.

And even at his young age, Yuki had learned to put up shields to guard himself against the attacks.

As he'd grown older, he'd learned that though his identity as the Rat placed him in an outwardly revered position among the Souma, it also fueled the rage directed against him by the others of the Zodiac.

His first meeting with Hatsuharu had consisted of insults hurled at him by an enraged boy with whom he'd never even come into contact.

Yuki'd been able to dispel Haru's hatred and had even managed to console the younger boy, but the encounter had left him shaken and hurt.

And not very much later he'd met another member of the Zodiac. A boy with eyes like rubies and hair the color of the sunset sky.

He'd been enchanted by the unique coloring and by the appearance of the young boy who had stood outside alone during that chill winter night, staring up at the dark sky. So much so that he'd been drawn out of his hiding place and had revealed himself with an innocently awed whisper; "pretty!"

That had been a mistake.

The other boy whirled around to glare at him furiously raining down insults and hateful words upon a shocked Yuki vowing even then to forever curse him for being the Rat.

So Yuki had fled. Straight into the arms of Akito who'd promptly informed him that he should hate the Cat just as fiercely and forever remind it of it's place—below the Rat. Not worthy even, to breath the same air of the Rat.

Naively Yuki'd protested, stating that he wanted to be the "pretty" boy's friend.

He'd been punished. Severely. It was the last time he said such a thing.

As time passed, his walls grew thicker and higher locking him into is own world of self-loathing and torture even as he sought to build them for protection against such things.

Eventually the walls became a place behind which to hide his disgusting soul along with multitudes of secrets and shame.

Instead of keeping the hurt out, he used the walls to conceal the pain, his true feelings and his emptiness. It was ironic that not only was he physically trapped within Akito's clutches, but he had also mentally trapped himself, unable to escape Akito even within himself.

But his walls were crumbling. And he knew that soon everyone would see that what lay behind them—what little was left of himself—wasn't even worth salvaging.

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Kyo met Hatori's eyes over the top of Yuki's head his expression mirrored by the worry on the doctor's face.

It had started out okay—the task of tending to Yuki's injuries. They'd propped the boy up against a stack of pillows keeping him upright and Kyo had been following Hatori's soft commands on how to proceed.

And while Yuki's eyes had been wide with fear and pain, his body trembling violently, he'd done nothing to hinder the process.

He'd stayed perfectly still, hand's white-knuckled clutching tightly at the blankets in his lap, body broken out in a cold sweat and his breathing rapid and short. But he'd been cooperative. He'd been there.

Then suddenly it was as if he'd completely left his body, or burrowed so deep inside himself that he was no longer responsive to anything going on around him. His eyes had gone vacant, and his body had loosened and ceased trembling. His breathing too had evened out.

Yuki had stopped responding even to the point of showing no signs of pain though Kyo knew he was on the minimal amount of painkillers.

But Hatori hadn't ceased working and likewise neither had Kyo. They'd carefully spread salve over healing wounds and re-wrapped Yuki's broken arm and ribs tightly in clean fresh bandages.

Finally when they were finished, they laid the unresponsive boy back against the pillows so that he was half-way reclining with no pressure on his ribs.

As Hatori began straightening up Kyo watched his empty-eyed cousin perplexedly.

"It's called Emotional Detachment or Disassociation." Hatori said suddenly, breaking the heavy silence in the room.

Kyo looked up at the doctor seeing the thinly veiled distress over his features.

"It's a common symptom that often arises from psychological trauma. Yuki's been through a lot. It's the only thing that helps him to cope with these situations."

"These situations?" Kyo stated flatly. "How long has this been going on Hatori?"

The older man gave him a measuring look. "Kyo you must have known that something was going on."

Kyo scowled looking down at his detached cousin. "I didn't realize…not…not really."

Hatori sighed. "Since he was three."

Kyo's head jerked up. "Wha—"

"Akito's been doing this since he was three. Of course it wasn't always to this extent. He used mostly words back then."

Kyo's surprise was almost tangible. "B-but surely…" he sputtered. "Surely his mother—"

"His mother sold him to Akito. To gain a more prominent position among the Souma."

Kyo—eyes wide with shock—was speechless. "I—"

"It's okay Kyo. You don't have to say anything. Really, what is there to say?" The doctor shook his head desolately.

Kyo's dark eyes narrowed. "Why hasn't anyone done anything?" He demanded. "Isn't the Rat supposed to be precious? The one everyone is supposed to love and protect?"

Hatori's own eyes widened. "Kyo…Yuki is Akito's possession. We of the Zodiac cannot go against what he says."

"What the hell is that supposed to mean?!" Kyo exploded furious.

Hatori scowled. "He is God. And we are of the zodiac. We must obey him. We have no choice. Yuki cannot stand that he can't escape Akito's orders any more than the rest of us. Have you never wondered why it is that he will never allow you to beat him when you fight?"

Kyo froze. "What do you mean?"

Hatori said calmly, "He knows Kyo. About the deal Akito made with you. Akito told him."

Kyo swore lowly, his voice a deep growl.

"He wishes to save you from the same fate he suffers. To be free of the zodiac curse means more than just the absence of the physical changes it causes when we are embraced by the opposite sex. It is to be free of Akito and the influence he has over us."

"He's only condemning me to a cage by not letting me win." Kyo growled.

Hatori sent him a wry look. "And who's to keep you from leaving this place and avoiding that fate all together?"

Kyo's expression changed to one of surprise.

"Really Kyo," Hatori said exasperated, "you haven't thought about that yourself? Yuki has been counting on the fact that you would."

Again Kyo found himself with nothing to say.

He was saved however from making a response by Hatori's calm voice. "You missed breakfast this morning. I'll have someone bring you and Yuki something to eat. Watch over him for me, he should wake up soon."

And with that he left the room, shutting the door softly behind him.

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Fingers trembling violently, Yuki quickly buttoned his shirt closed. Silently, he thanked Hatori for interrupting Akito when he had; knowing what would have happened if Akito had been allowed time to continue.

'Don't think about it.'

Accidentally his fingers brushed against the ugly red mark on his collarbone where Akito had bitten him only minutes ago. He hissed at the light contact, gingerly finishing buttoning up his collar, covering the mark.

He was glad that his uniform shirts were collared. Hiding the mark would have been difficult otherwise. Shirt buttoned, he nervously wiped damp palms across his dark slacks before softly treading across the wooden floor of the main room to the door. Quietly he listened for sounds of anyone approaching and hearing nothing, he carefully proceeded to slide open the door.

After glancing down the hallway in both directions he silently slipped out of the main room and headed for the closest exit.

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It was only a little after five-thirty when Yuki arrived home and by then he'd gotten his emotions firmly under control. He couldn't give himself away to the others.

"Tadaima." He called softly stepping into the front hall.

"Ah Yuki-kun! Welcome back!" Tohru called, her head poking out from the kitchen door way.

Yuki smiled generously at her, slipping off his shoes and placing them neatly by the front door.

"Honda-san. How was your day?"

Tohru blushed endearingly. "It was wonderful Yuki-kun. I'm so excited; Spring Break is coming up soon! A whole three weeks vacation! Isn't it great?"

Yuki's smile became more forced. "Ah, yes it is."

Tohru smiled brilliantly. "I can't wait!" she exclaimed disappearing into the kitchen. After a moment she called back, "Ano, dinner will be done soon Yuki-kun would you tell the others?"

"Of course Honda-san." Yuki replied heading for the stairs.

His forced smile disappeared completely as he reached the top. It was exhausting always having to put up a façade.

'But I can never let them know the truth.'

A flash of what had taken place earlier that afternoon passed through his mind. Akito with his lips pressed harshly against Yuki's own.

He felt shame and guilt begin to surface in his conscious and quickly prevented the emotions from showing on his features. He wished he could banish the emotions themselves as well.

He knew though, that he could never erase so many years of anguish from his soul. Nor the last five years when the torture had become more than just cruel words and harsh beatings.

Closing his eyes, he paused a moment to push back the overwhelming feelings. He would deal with them later when he wasn't about to go down to dinner. With a deep breath he opened his eyes and started down the hall to Kyo's room.

Knocking twice on the wooden frame he called out, "Kyo, dinner's ready."

When after a moment there was no answer he knocked again, louder this time. "Kyo!"

Abruptly the door was jerked open and Kyo was glaring severely down upon him, narrowed red eye, locked with wide violet.

"Stop making such a racket ya Damn Rat!" he growled, scowling fiercely.

Yuki stepped back, erasing the shocked surprise from his expression and replacing it with boredom and a hint of scorn.

"Tohru's calling us for dinner." He replied calmly, taking in Kyo's messy appearance.

'He must have been asleep.'

"Yeah, yeah I heard ya." Kyo responded stepping from his room and sliding the door closed behind him.

Turning on his heal he brushed past Yuki and all but stomped towards the stairs.

"Hey perverted Dig! Dinner's ready!" Kyo called as he passed Shigure's door at the end of the hall.

Yuki sighed at the fiery boy's temperament, before following him down the hall.

Just as he was passing by Shigure's room the door slid open and the Dog stepped out.

"Ah Yuki, how was your meeting?" he asked a slight smile across his features.

Yuki stared at the dog wondering if the double meaning behind the words was intentional.

"I-it went well…" He finally forced out.

"That's good Yuki. That's good." The other said walking past Yuki and down the stairs.

Yuki remained standing at the top of the stairwell alarm coursing through his body. Was Shigure aware of what had been going on? He was sure that the man knew about Akito's orders concerning Yuki's visiting him. But had the man been hinting at the knowledge of something more? Or was Yuki just being paranoid?

Shaking his head Yuki continued down the stairs, if he didn't get into the dining room soon he would be missed.

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Dinner passed quietly and Yuki felt himself start to relax into the feeling of normalcy that Shigure's house possessed. He was sitting in the family room across from a dosing Kyo, reading form one of the class-assigned books that had been handed out to all the second-year students, when the phone rang.

After a couple of rings Kyo sat up from where he'd been resting his head on the table and went to answer the annoying machine.

"Hello?" A pause and a scowl later the redhead burst out, "I haven't forgotten!...Whatever…"

Then turning to Yuki and holding out the phone he stated, "Akito."

Yuki felt the color drain abruptly from his face and a terrified shiver passed through his frame. Shakily he stood and walked over to his cousin, reaching out with a trembling hand and taking the receiver from the taller boy.

Akito seemed to know exactly when Yuki had put the phone to his ear and began speaking.

"We didn't get to finish what we started earlier Yuki," he purred. "I'm disappointed, you left before I got back."

Yuki could feel his cousin's eyes on him and he cursed the fact that he couldn't hide the turmoil that he knew was clearly visible on his features. Turning his back to the other boy so that he was facing the wall he nearly whispered into the phone.

"Gomen nassai."

"You should have stayed Yuki. Now I'm going to have to punish you."

"P-please Akito—" Yuki began in a choked voice.

"Don't argue with me Yuki."

Blindly Yuki put out a shaking hand to steady himself against the wall before him.

"Spring break is coming up soon. I've heard Hatsuharu and that annoyance of a rabbit talking about it. I want to spend more time with you Yuki. I never get to see you anymore since you're always at that dog's house. So I've thought of a wonderful solution. You'll come stay with me here during your break. It'll be fun don't you think?

Yuki felt his throat close up and the only sound that came from him was a strangled whimper.

"I'm glad you agree with me. You can stay in your old room, right next to mine."

The silver-haired boy's legs buckled and he collapsed to his knees wheezing harshly. His fingers constricted hard around the plastic of the phone as he struggled to breath.

"Well Yuki I've got to go, Hatori is coming. But I'll see you tomorrow, ne? Ja."

There was a small click and then the dial tone rang dully in Yuki's ear.

The receiver slipped from numb fingers to clatter loudly on the floor as Yuki gripped at his chest. He couldn't breath.

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