Chapter 10

There were some days that were almost perfect, and Suzume had been having one of those days, right up until her cell phone rang with a foreboding tone. She knew it would spell trouble, and loathed the person on the other side so deeply she couldn't keep the contempt out of her voice when she greeted him. It seemed as if he felt the same.

"You did this to her!" An irate voice shouted through the phone instead of a normal address. "Your influence warped her."

"Well, it most certainly wasn't yours, Tadao." Suzume sighed with a roll of her eyes. "You were never there."

"You had one appointed task as my wife, and that was to raise the Fujino heir properly." He muttered, so angry he saw red. He needed a drink badly, but settled for barking into the receiver instead. "Don't you understand the complexity of the situation?"

"Considering that I've no clue what you're talking about, no, I haven't a grasp of it." Suzume told him, unsure of why she was being yelled at, but not particularly minding.

"A woman!" He spat the phrase with poison. "Who on earth would think for a moment that she hasn't lost her mind?"

Suzume licked her lips, the obvious conclusion coming to light. She smirked bitterly in spite of herself. "I wouldn't…"

"You've also lost yours too, last I checked." Tadao returned, not in the least bit amused. "Have you even met this girl that Shizuru seems so taken with?"

"Yes, I have." Suzume said quietly knowing that she was on speaker phone. "I know the girl in question rather well, actually. They did grow up together." She could picture him sitting at his desk, his head in his hands as he leaned over a stiff drink. That was his usual means of lamenting a particularly bad day, and the idea that Shizuru had cause his ire to raise was somewhat amusing. "Am I to assume that her choices trouble you?"

"A good friend does not, under any circumstance, make a lover." Tadao groused. "Suzume, this is utterly too much."

"I agree, it is." She held the phone carefully in her hand, closing her eyes as she leaned into Saeko, who stood silently behind her. "It always has been, hence is the nature of our divorce in the first place…"

"I wasn't talking about the two of us!" He bellowed, causing the woman to sigh as she pulled the phone away from her ear.

"I gathered that." Suzume returned to him, a dry tone leaking from her otherwise melodic voice. "We never did discuss our personal matters, so it would be idiotic to assume that we might start now."

A deep growl gave way from the depths of his throat. "Would you please, for the love of god, stop ignoring the crux of the issue here? This goes against good moral and principle. She's your daughter, Suzume, do something!"

"And just what exactly is it that you'd have me do?" Suzume asked him. "I won't discourage Shizuru from seeing Natsuki."

"Which of course means that you do encourage it…entirely." Tadao sighed at length. "Why on earth would you instill such a bad habit into the one and only heir?"

Suzume considered that for a moment, and then shrugged, even though she knew Tadao would never see the action. She could feel Saeko kissing the back of her neck, a soft reminder that she was not alone, and that this argument was entirely pointless. The Fujino women did exactly what they wished to do. Suzume doubted that even if she wanted to convince Shizuru otherwise, that her one and only child would listen. She was a dutiful daughter, but she was by no means a pushover, and she was not so easily controlled by money and greed.

Suzume felt those truths to be comfort, not a hindrance, though she gave no voice to that. Instead, she tilted her head to the side, enjoying the feather soft kisses and voiceless comfort of the woman who stood by her side. "If Shizuru learned her bad habit from me, which I highly doubt is a habit at all mind you, frankly you'd only have yourself to blame for it anyway." Suzume began carefully, her voice measured with good reason. "She's a lesbian, Tadao, it happens."

"Gay I can deal with…I'm not happy with it, but I can deal with it…" He sat at his desk confused, bothered by the stories Shizuru had told him, speaking at length about a woman who was not of particularly high breeding. "I am not so inept, Suzume, to think that one's sexuality is a whim so easily changed on command…that girl…Natsuki I think is her name…I believe she is the whim in question."

"To some extent, Natsuki is a whimsical type of person." Suzume said quietly. "All young women are, in some way or another."

"I've said it before, I'll say it again." Tadao muttered. "You are without a doubt, the most insufferable person I've ever met!"

"The feeling is mutual." Suzume returned, hanging the phone up on him, and ignoring it once he tried to call back. "The nerve of that man…"

"Mmm…" Saeko voiced, as she continued to trail soft kisses in places she knew they would be appreciated. "There are names for people like him, being pissed won't help." Not entirely minding the fact that Suzume felt particularly agitated, Saeko rested her chin on Suzume's shoulder. Rather than making a list, Saeko coaxed the cellphone out of her lover's hand and dropped it into the drawer beside her, closing it.

"I suppose you have a better idea?" Suzume asked, though her scowl remained in place. A beseeching hand began to travel its way up her thigh, and if she were in any other mood, she would have easily given into Saeko's offer. "You're not going to get lucky tonight, I'm just not in the mood."

"That's because you're worried." Saeko muttered as she pulled away. "Now, so am I." It was strange for Suzume to deny sex, even angry sex…which in its own way was kinky and hotter than hell when it did happen to occur. "Shizuru will be fine, you know that." Saeko said as she reached from the coffee she had sitting on the side of her bed, taking sip.

"He hasn't the slightest idea to what motivates her heart." Suzume wasn't one to display emotion as explosively as Saeko's own tendencies when angry, but the cold look that seemed to cast daggers into the drawer was more than enough to speak the truth. "He's angry at me, as if I've done something wrong, but as I recall, it was his skirt chasing that left his bed cold at night."

"Which is why you found a new bed to warm, and I have no intention of letting you go so easily." Saeko shook her head. "Babe, you're letting him get to you. What he complains about doesn't matter. It's not as if Shizuru would ever take his ranting to heart if he confronted her, and he knows that." She sipped her coffee again. "That's why he called and took it out on you."

"There is that." Suzume sighed, shaking her head as she slouched, hiding her face in her hands. "When it comes to Shizuru's welfare, we've thankfully remained a united front, but I don't know for how much longer that's going to last." Then, she lifted her face and drew the covers up around her exposed legs. "I know she'll be alright, but that does nothing for my sanity when he calls in a huff about things beyond even my control." Bitterly she smirked. "As if I could ever tell Shizuru what to do, never mind who to do it with."

"Oh please, if Natsuki listened to a damn word I say, they'd both be back by now." In fact, one look at the clock caused Saeko to curse. It was past curfew.

"Did you sign the paperwork for the dorm?" Suzume asked her.

"Oh come on, one crisis at a time." Saeko rolled over, putting a pillow over her head.

"Indeed, one crisis at a time." It was a needed distraction, and Suzume leaned over to the nightstand where the papers remained, untouched. "In the sequence of events, this came first. As a scientist surely even you can appreciate the numerical order of operation."

"At this rate, she won't need a dorm, because you'll all have put me into an early grave." Saeko muttered, pulling the papers that were waving in front of her back in the place they once sat dormant.

"Don't joke about that, it isn't at all funny." Softly, the voice pulled Saeko out from under her hiding place. "Will you sign them, please? You know it's what she wants."

"Sweet Jesus, give it a rest." Saeko said as she sat up. She pulled her glasses case from the spot she kept them, just above the shelf near her books. "And find a pen."

…

Natsuki knelt down, her fingers reaching the dirt. She waited for mere seconds, though it seemed like hours. It always did, she tried to keep calm, ignoring the sounds of the people around her. The unsteadiness of the others, as they fought down their own anxieties. For a moment, she pulled her lip between her teeth, exhaling and blinking hard, forcing away everything but the track in front of her.

Just the track…no one to see, no one who really cared one way or the other.

That's what Natsuki kept trying to remind herself, a lie she used, a mantra to keep herself from losing her nerve. The sound of the pop gun going off is what sent her on her way. Flying out the starting gate as fast as her legs could carry her. Her eyes steady, her form fleeting. Natsuki had always trained in this fashion, a determination in her stance that went without question. It consumed her very being as soon as she began to run.

Her speed was, as always, a force to reckon with, and the others noticed. She didn't care, and tried to block it out. One foot in front of the other. Nothing more, nothing less than that. Her breath steady, the world around her a blur. The women were always easy to beat, she trained with the boys after all, went the extra mile to sculpt herself into who she was…her form cat-like, masterful in her stride.

All that mattered was the finish line…getting there first was just an added bonus, a time when she could finally rest.

The point when she could slow to a stop, catch her breath, put her hands to her knees and let the burning in her chest take her. Then, with a sweaty hand she could shakily open her water bottle and swig from it before dumping the rest of the contents over her head. If she'd done a good job, her team would mob her in celebration.

That was the life she knew, full speed ahead, even when the shadows of her past cackled at her, teasing her about the old stuff she should have done better. So, when she finished her races, the first thing she did was lay down on the field, wondering why this victory along with all the rest felt so empty.

Her eyes slipped closed, as a sigh fell from her lips.

"You ran strong today." Saeko said after everyone had cleared the field, the locker rooms, and even most of the campus. "I thought you would have come to the car by now."

"Didn't feel like it." Natsuki muttered. "I still kind of don't." She hadn't even showered yet, hadn't changed from her outfit or even toweled off the sweat that had now soaked into her shirt.

"Natsuki…"

"What?"

Two sets of emerald eyes found each other. The younger pair glairing icy daggers into the older ones.

Saeko sighed, shaking her head. "We live in the same apartment, and yet you haven't spoken to me since the other day." Saeko knelt down then, pulling another bottle of water from her purse, handing it to her daughter. "It's my job to worry about you, and also my god given right as your mother."

"Shut up." Natsuki averted her eyes as she sat up. "You don't believe in god."

"No." Saeko smiled, her daughter was always sharp and to the point, yet her barbs were blunted and shallow. "I don't, that was something your father believed in."

"Well, if he does exist, God's an ass." Natsuki muttered as she stood up. "I'm going to go get changed."

It was the nearest thing to an apology that Saeko would ever get, and she would never really know what the apology was directly for, but she took it anyway. "I'll be waiting in the car." She called, but by that time Natsuki already had one foot in the door to the girl's locker room.

She had prepared a long and complicated mother to daughter speech about coming of age and responsibility, but it all died in her throat when she'd seen Natsuki sprawled out on the track field. There were more memories tied to that one pose than Saeko cared to admit. She went back to the car, pulling the sealed envelope out of the glove box, considering it...

Knowing that if she really handed it over to Natsuki, she'd be letting her daughter run free at the campus.

Somehow, the idea of relinquishing that kind of power hurt. Knowing that Natsuki wanted to be away from her should have logically made sense. The need for independence was a good thing, at least it should have been. Saeko sucked in a breath, her little girl wasn't so little anymore, and she knew that…she'd always known that eventually, she'd have to let go.

It was just harder than she wanted to accept, and she never had been good with sentiment. It bugged her to no end, even if it wasn't a surprise.

When Natsuki got into the car she could see the sealed envelope, and the vexed look on her mother's features. "Uh, you okay?" Natsuki asked awkwardly, now thinking better of bumming a ride back to the apartment.

"You have to call me…" Saeko said quietly. "Check in, so that I know that you're alright. If you break curfew, it'll hurt your grades…and if you get on academic probation even once, you're coming home. " Emerald met emerald. "You are my daughter, and whether I like it or not, I know that you're going to repeat a good deal my mistakes." She handed Natsuki the permission slip. "Furthermore, whether you like it or not, I still have one more year that I can force you, by law, to listen and do as I say…do not make me have to use it."

"I won't." Natsuki murmured, unsure yet again of the victory she had just achieved. It felt empty too, and inwardly she scowled, not having the slightest clue why.