I do not own TF2

An omake to help get me back in the groove of writing.

Just to clarify:

- Yes, I have taken some liberties with the nationalities of various characters. RED Sniper is British, RED Engineer was Californian (was. Cause you know, he's dead). The change in nationality is just so that the teams aren't perfect mirrors of each other.

XxXxXxX

Brother,

How are you?

Dead I hope.

Yes, brother dear, I still hate you. Nothing is going to change the fact, except maybe your death. I might even have your name carved into the memorial stone, no promises to the accuracy of the spelling though.

Just joking.

I love you brother, though you still owe me a butterfly knife. What is with you stealing mine anyway? For good luck or something stupid like that? I really resent that you took it with you, it did take me four months to make the damn thing.

Rambling aside, happy birthday my obnoxious older sibling. May you live long enough to give me back my knife and not a moment sooner. Just joking.

Well, kind of.

Anyway, Mom made all your favorite dishes, even though you aren't here to eat them. Screw you and your love for potatoes. Freaking nasty balls of starch. I don't understand how you can eat them. The custard pie was good though, so I had your portion as well as mine. Serves you right for not coming home for the holiday.

You aren't getting any gifts this year, Dad went and got himself hospitalized so we don't really have any spare cash. Not that I'm complaining, at least I don't have to listen to the old man bitching about how I'm not being lady-like. He can go screw a goat for all I care. I like being a sword smith.

Speaking of sword smithing, do you think you could get me one of the "kukri" things that you mentioned last time? They sound really cool! I want to try making one, getting kind of tired of making straight blades...

XxXxXxX

(Sniper)

"Whoa! Frenchie's got a letter? Who do ya think it's from?" Scout yelped, crumbs tumbling from his mouth. Lucky kid, getting home-baked goods for Christmas.

I glance over to our resident sadistic freak, but he doesn't seem to notice Scout's cookie-crumb spraying rambles. Odd, since Spy is usually a neat freak on top of being a sadistic psychopath. He looks almost...absorbed by the letter, legs neatly crossed as he reclines in my favorite chair. Not that I really care, as I wander over to swipe a cookie from Scout's gift box.

Mmmm...gingersnaps, delicious.

"Stop stealing my cookies you British fuck!"

"Stop being so easy to steal from chum." I drawl, causally ducking Scout's punch, before walking over to where Spy is and draping myself over the chair back. "What you got there? Love letter?"

Toying with Spy is always a risky proposition, but life isn't fun without risks, and I'm feeling plenty lucky today. Behind me Scout makes a squeaking noise, no doubt remembering the time he tried to yank on Spy's tail.

Medic was stitching up our New York street rat for six hours straight.

"Sister."

"WHAT?" Scout's shrieks, spraying a plume of cookie crumbs three feet in front of himself. "SINCE WHEN DO YOU HAVE FAMILY?"

I blink, having been lost in thought, then stare at Spy. "Your file doesn't say anything about you having a sister."

"Oath-bound." He grunts, gloved fingers shifting through the pages with practiced ease. I can't help but feel a little bit jealous, grace is not one of my strong points. He notes my bemused expression and Scout's look of utter confusions and sighs, apparently taking pity on us. "Sworn siblings. Not blood related."

He flips to the next page of his letter, then gives both of us a terrifyingly content smile, "Little brat is threatening to kill me." I'll be damned, he sounds almost proud of the fact.

"What else is new?" Scout snaps, obviously covering up his fear with false bravado. "Everyone on BLU threatens to kill you all the time." I nod, keeping an eye on Spy, since you never know when he is going to flip out and stab the nearest person.

Spy waves away the comment, chuckling slightly. "Yes, people threaten to kill me all zhe time, but how many threaten to kill me by feeding me starving hamsters." He snorts, flipping to another page of the letter. "Ah, allow me to correct myself, 'starving dwarf hamsters'." A laugh that isn't all that sane spills from his lips, making me shiver slightly.

Well damn. From the expression on Spy's face he actually cares about the girl. I'm not sure if that is terrifying or heartwarming.

I think I'll go with terrifying.

XxXxXxX

"You are sure zhat zhe BLUz vill be getting a new Medic?"

"I am sure of it. My information source is highly trustworthy." I chuckle softly, "Zhe BLU team will be receiving a new Medic in four days. Just as we will be receiving our new Engineer."

"Good, I vill alert zhe rest of zhe team. Now get out, I haf zhings to do!"

A smile creeps across my face, as I walk away from Medic's lair. You have given me such a wonderful gift dear Sister. I wonder what it took for you to find information on my dear BLU Medic's family.

I pull the neatly folded sheets of paper from my pants pocket, scanning over the seemingly nonsensical jumble of thoughts. I think I may leave a copy lying around, so that my BLU counterpart can "find" it. Won't it be fun to have him try to decode the messages, only to grow frustrated when he can't find a message at all. Of course, he would have to understand you to get the messages, and the only one who does understand you is me.

It seems like saving you from the streets and raising you to be my mirror-image was the best thing I could have ever done for myself.

I do so love having a family.

Perhaps I will pay my dear BLU Medic a visit, spread the holiday cheer so to speak.

XxXxXxX

Well...that is that. Next chapter will be back to the usual REDSpy/BLUMedic storyline.