Chapter 10 – Death Is a Midnight Runner
The Doctor was without his leg braces and his body had succumbed to total exhaustion, so Kilo had carried the Doctor through the corridor across the hall, into another student room, where the unmistakable form of Zow was lying unmoving on the bed.
Kilo had sat the Doctor down in a chair close to the bed, and stepped back. There was a long, silent pause, as the Doctor wasn't quite sure what to do for a moment.
"Zow?" he eventually asked quietly.
The alien opened his eyes, gazing up at the Doctor. He lifted a trembling hand, and pressed it to the Time Lord's head. The Doctor held it in place for him, gazing into Zow's eyes.
"I never thought I would be such a horrible person," Zow's voice came through, telepathic.
"No one is saying you are," the Doctor replied telepathically.
"But I am. I have done so much in my life, Time Lord. I have seen so much. I have lost so much. But I never should have built that machine. I was naïve. I thought so many things could be done with it, for good, but I realise now that I am a monster. I should never have cheated life. Things are meant to die."
The Doctor shook his head. "No, what you built... that's amazing. It's beyond incredible. Don't think it was a bad thing."
"I became a god; no one should have that power. No one. I think you understand that."
The Doctor eventually nodded. "Maybe no one should have control over life and death, but that resurrection machine was proof of what can be done. The technology we can make. I've never seen anything like it. You are an absolute genius, Zow."
"I am just an old man with far too many stories to tell. I thought the machine could be used for so much good. I planned to offer its use to people free of charge, but the government turned on me, cut my funding, and planned to assassinate me. In their haste the machine was damaged, it heavily malfunctioned and it killed everyone on my planet except for me, Doctor. Even my family, my two dear children, my loving wife."
The Doctor swallowed. "I know the feeling."
"For all the horror it had caused, I vowed never to build it again. I fled to Earth to live a solitary life, and found myself a victim of the shifter in this gangrenous world. There is so much death here and the others... They have so little respect for life. So I rebuilt the machine... I thought if I could revive their dead they may eventually realise the futility of their fight. But I was foolish. They have only taken more lives. The beauty of living creatures is but a joke to them. That machine is nothing but a pure demon, and may its secrets die with me."
"You're not going to die."
"Of course I am. It feels so silly that what I was constantly trying to cheat was the one thing I would crave in the end. I am happy to die, Doctor."
"You just need to make the right things, Zow. The right things for the right people. Like my leg braces. They're an amazing invention. How you treated me was beyond the known laws of medicine – Jascak's Theorem, I have never found anything to contradict it until I met you. I should have been quadriplegic, but it's like I was never hurt. Before now I would have had to force a regeneration for the way I live my life, but with those legs braces it's like I have two completely functioning legs again. I don't even have to think about moving them. That is the happiness you could bring to so many paraplegic people like me."
"It doesn't even matter, Doctor. My inventions will eventually become weapons, a means to a bloody end without my even knowing. It all comes to death in the end. Death is a midnight runner, the one constant, and it should not be ignored. I ignored it, I made a mockery of it, and I have now paid my dues, as fate laughs in my face."
The Doctor's eyes dropped to the bed covers, acknowledging Zow's words without any indication.
"You know, I have met you once before," Zow continued.
"When?"
"You were but a child. You came to my planet with your family. You ate in the café I worked in."
The Doctor frowned. "How do you know it was me?"
"Your eyes. You still have your mother's eyes, despite how your face has changed. Eyes that even now are wide and open for the universe to enter. To gaze upon the Universe with such astonished eyes must be a pleasure indeed. It took my breath away when I saw you all those years ago. I had often wondered what had happened to that little boy, and perhaps the ties of fate draw us back together now for my end."
"But that would make you..." The Doctor struggled to work out the linear timeline for a moment. "It'd make you 11,000 years old."
"Doesn't time fly? For me, it has flown. Good bye, Doctor. I have failed. If anyone can change these poor men to respect life, it's you, I'm sure."
The Doctor gazed at him some more, his eyes searching that poor alien lying there, knowing he was about to die. "You are far too clever for this universe, Zow. We just aren't ready for you."
For the first time, the Doctor saw Zow smile. A little curve up of the mouth, warmth in his eyes.
"Thank you for listening to a dying man's thoughts, Time Lord. God speed, my friend."
Zow's hand slackened, and his eyes closed as the last breath escaped him, his smile disappearing.
"Zow?" Vanaj asked anxiously, running forward to shake his shoulder. "Zow! Zow, talk to me!"
The Doctor simply took Zow's hand off of his head, placing it carefully on the alien's stomach.
"Vanaj, leave him," he said quietly.
"He's dead?" G'uj croaked.
The Doctor nodded solemnly. "I'm so sorry."
"How could you let him die?!" Kilo suddenly yelled, grabbing the Doctor to shake him. Vanaj quickly manhandled Kilo, dragging him from the Time Lord.
"This wasn't the Doctor, Kilo. This was the humans. The humans did this. The humans killed Zow, Rekko, Zolo, Polo and Rolo."
"Let's fulaking kill those jai'kls, then!" Kilo swore. "Every last one!"
"Where do we start?" G'uj asked.
"We'll bomb the k'ashi out of their base!" Kilo yelled, his eyes on fire. "Blow it to smithereens! Jux, you got a cocktail for that?"
"If required," Jux replied, as stoic as ever.
"We can get fuel for the craft somewhere if we look hard enough," Kilo continued.
"Just a straight overhead attack," Tex planned, already calculating it on her computer. "We'll wipe them all..."
"No," the Doctor suddenly said, staring at the ground, hand on his mouth as he tried desperately not to cry.
Everyone suddenly stopped, looking at him.
"What?" Kilo asked, stunned.
"You're not doing that."
Tex was astounded. "Just who's side are you on, Time Lord?!"
"We're gonna get these jai'kls, for Zow, for Rekko, for the triplets!" Kilo yelled, and raised his gun straight at the Doctor's head. "If you're not on our side you're on no one's side!"
"But Kilo, the Switch..." Jux began quickly.
"Ha! The Switch!" Kilo practically laughed out with a complete craziness in his eyes. "Not like he's come up with anything yet! I bet he don't even know where it is! He's made us protect him, he's let these people die for him and he's been lying to us all along!"
"Get that away from him," Jux grated, drawing out his own weapon to point at Kilo.
"I'll kill you too, Jux!" Kilo screamed. "Don't think I won't!"
The Doctor was suddenly furious. "Listen to yourselves!" he screamed. He was aware he'd now totally lost control, but right now he didn't much care. "You've completely lost all reasoning! Zow didn't want this! He didn't want you to avenge him or anything like that! He didn't want you to start killing each other! Deal with your grief in a different way! Just stop the violence, stop it for one night, we need to honour those five because they're dead, and there's no resurrection machine to bring them back this time! You should take this night to respect their lives by giving them your attention, not by causing more death!"
Kilo made for the trigger, but Vanaj launched out to grab his arm, staring at his old friend. "The Doctor's right, Kilo."
"You're with him too, now?!" Kilo burst out, but he was in tears.
"Kilo, please," Vanaj said gently. "I know your pain, believe me. But he's right."
"But... they were my friends," Kilo gasped, collapsing onto Vanaj in tears. The gun slipped out of his hand redundantly, hitting the floor with a quiet thud as he sobbed his heart out into Vanaj's chest.
All fell silent but for Kilo's sobs of utter despair. Vanaj looked at the Doctor, still holding Kilo in comfort.
"What should we do, Doctor?"
"... We need to have a funeral for Zow, Rekko and the triplets."
Vanaj nodded. "Then that's what we will do."
It was now midnight, and they'd dug a grave for Zow. After they had filled it Vanaj had marked the spot with a Jazan symbol for life; just a finger tracing a symbol in the dirt. Tex and Kilo had followed suit, carving the symbols in their own languages for friendship and strength beside his. The Doctor watched on, and G'uj held him supportively in case he weakened and fell over.
"N-cera'qe-ia'zachit-ia ici ce'chira. N-cera'qe-ia'lola-ia ye wi-alok'mira. N-cera'qe-ia'gricha-ia terna iviran'kyea. N-cera'qe-ia'veera-gea-ia ici ce wi-aiiw'wrea. N-qe ei'baniora, tara ei arit'aroinab-n. N-miho ce'celerial-ia'kaiti joh kai cen hira," the Doctor whispered, staring at the mud of Zow's grave. He couldn't help it. He couldn't stop the tears. And for once, he let them fall freely.
These people were dead because of him. They'd died protecting him. All those humans that had been in that fight – all fighting to get him. All the death. Because of him.
He wasn't sure he could cope with that.
The funeral ended in the rain. They were about to leave, when the Doctor held up a hand, still staring at the grave.
"The... The Switch is in the Lake District, on the top of Scafell Pike," he said quietly.
Vanaj nodded. Nobody else spoke. "There'll be no more fighting. When dawn breaks, we'll set off. Everyone try and get some rest."
It was around 2am when another paper aeroplane arrived. Rose snatched it up immediately – a written note on the back of some sort of Law essay. But this note was all wonky, the words changing size as they went along, the whole thing only just about legible.
Rose, Jackie,
Things aren't good. We've fled our base with casualties, five have died. The others are on a knife edge. I can't let anymore people die because of me. I'm going to start leading them to the Switch, so both of you start heading to the Lake District. I'll meet you there. Be careful.
The Doctor
"Mum!" she yelled loudly, and Jackie came to her instantly. "Read this."
Jackie did, her eyes widening. "What's wrong with his writing? I can't even read that."
"I dunno," Rose muttered. "He says five of them are dead and he's going to take the ones left to the Switch to stop the fighting because of him. He says to get there and meet him."
"It says that?" Jackie asked seriously.
"We've gotta go," Rose said quickly, making to the window. She was about to climb out when a voice suddenly stopped her dead – frozen on the spot.
"Going somewhere?" Leo wondered.
Rose spun around instantly to meet the man's hard gaze, stunned like a blow between the eyes. "Umm..."
"What's that?" he asked, pointing at the piece of paper in her hand.
Rose's heart skipped a beat. "Um, nothin', it's nothin'..."
Before she could hide it Leo snatched it from her, and she started panicking badly, trying to grab it back but he held it out of reach.
"Whoa, whoa, whoa, this thing must be fucking important," Leo stated, and began to read the note from the Doctor. Rose's heart sank like a stone as his eyes ran across the page, widening with every word.
His head snapped up to her. "You were gonna leave for the Lake District without saying good bye?! Fucking shame on you, girl, I thought we were friends?"
Rose had utterly no reply. Her mouth opened and closed but no words came out, like a speechless fish. Jackie had nothing either, looking between Leo and Rose in a panic.
"So the Switch is in the Lake District. Interesting," Leo mused, scrunching up the paper and chucking it behind him. "And interesting he should tell you. I guess you mean something to him if he can be arsed to keep in contact with you. Good."
He dived forward to grab Rose's arm, yanking her back out of the door.
"No! What're you doin'?" Jackie yelped.
"I'm gonna get me a Time Lord!" Leo screamed in delight.
"Mum, stay here!" Rose begged as she disappeared around the corner.
"Like bloody hell I am!" Jackie yelled, running after them as quickly as she could.
A/N: Translation
N-cera'qe-ia'zachit-ia ici ce'chira.
N-cera'qe-ia'lola-ia ye wi-alok'mira.
N-cera'qe-ia'gricha-ia terna iviran'kyea.
N-cera'qe-ia'veera-gea-ia ici ce wi-aiiw'wrea.
N-qe ei'baniora, tara ei arit'aroinab-n.
N-miho ce'celerial-ia'kaiti joh kai cen hira.
All those thunders in the sun
All those moments of painful fun
All those poems with empty verse
All those flights in a tiny universe
That, I remember, and I will never forget
How the stars shined when we first met
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