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A/N : Ok so I'm going to make you all a deal. Since the next chapter is just about written, if 20 of you guys review, I will update immediately. If not, it'll be another two weeks :)
Ok so massive thank you's to my three fantastic reviewers - Linz832, Blue_eyes_lover and Eeyore16 you guys are awesome :) :) :) :)
Chapter 10
Ready Or Not, Here I Come, You Can't Hide
Gonna Find You and Take it Slowly
Ready Or Not, Here I Come, You Can't Hide
Gonna Find You and Make you want me.
Ready or not - The Fugees
I forced myself to keep climbing the stairs to my apartment. I could not, would not turn around. As much as I wanted to, I couldn't. Things were complicated enough without adding this... whatever this was, between me and Edward, into the mix. I was in dangerous territory with him. Caught between wanting him, and knowing I couldn't have him.
It didn't help that every time I was near him, it felt like my body gravitated towards him. Every movement he made, I seemed to counter. There was an undeniable spark between us, that zapped away whenever we touched. It was a scary, yet exciting feeling, something I yearned for, like an addict with their chosen drug.
Out of everyone, it had been him I had been most worried about hearing my story. It would have killed me had he thought any less of me, but regardless he needed to know. He had unknowingly gotten himself involved by hitting out at James. I needn't have worried though, true to Edward's form, he was supportive beyond belief. They all were.
I let myself into my apartment, shutting the door firmly behind me, activating each lock before allowing myself to relax against it. Letting out a huge sigh of relief in knowing that there was now something more solid keeping me from running to him. I had to get myself in check. Regardless of my feelings.
This week I would be completing all the tests needed, before the following week, going through the treatment. In a few weeks I would be pregnant, hopefully, with his Brothers child. And then for nine months, my whole energy had to be focused on keeping the baby healthy. As much as I wished Edward could fit in somewhere, I failed to see exactly where. It wasn't that I didn't want him to, God did I ever want him to, but it would inevitably put him between rock and hard place.
Add all the surrogacy issues to the James issues, and I had more than enough going on in my life, without dragging Edward further into my mess. I may have slightly exaggerated when I told him I had only received a few texts from James. In honesty, I was averaging at least one a day. The Police could do little for me though since none of the texts actually acknowledged who the sender was, and the number was coming from a different number each time, with no way of even tracking it back to the owner.
During the next week, I was going to have my number changed, with plans to only give the new number to people I trusted inexplicably, which if I was honest would probably only be my Dad, Angela, Ben, Seth and the Cullen's.
This week would also be the week that I told Angela my plans. I had no doubt that she would be supportive. She would know my reasons as well as anyone, better in fact. My one worry was telling Jane. I hadn't been with the company a year, yet I would already be planning to have some form of maternity leave.
My cell phone beeped, jumping me from my reverie. It was a text, the singular beep, a noise I had become to dread in the past weeks. Checking once again that the door was securely locked, I reached over and flipped the light switch before digging in my pocket to retrieve the phone. Taking a big breath, I opened the message, both relieved and anxious when I saw that it wasn't from James.
B - I'm sorry, I didn't mean to be so forward. I meant every word I said though. If you need anything, call me - E xoxo
I didn't know whether I should reply, or ignore him. Ignoring him would only put off the inevitable, and lets face it, awkwardness would commence the next time I saw him anyway. And yes I would most likely be seeing him again. Which might I add was a good thing and a bad thing.
I cursed myself. Why couldn't anything I ever did be simple, easy and without complication. It seemed as though everything I did in my life, I made harder for myself some way.
Biting the bullet I hit reply, before sitting and staring at the blank message, wondering what I needed to say.
E - It's ok, I'm sorry too. Thank you, I will - B xoxo
Simple enough right? I didn't want him to think I was being ignorant or anything, but I didn't want to encourage either. Clearly I was going to have to be the strong one here, and I needed to nip this... whatever this was, in the bud now, before it got any worse. After all, it was just a crush right?
I slept very little that night, my mind fully active, not seeming to want to shut down. And then when it finally did, the damn water pipes decided they had, had enough rest, and wanted to begin their nightly ritual of waking the whole building up, with their metal music.
So by the time I sat at my desk, having had only a mere two hours sleep, I felt about as good as I looked, which I knew was pretty gruesome. Angela again, my saviour placed a steamy mug of hot coffee in front of me, before looking at me with concern. She knew me well, sometimes a little too well. I shook my head, my own silent way of saying that I didn't want to explain right now.
"Drinks later." She answered, giving me no room to decline.
That one demand had me sat across from her, in this funky little wine bar. Neither of us had ever been here before, and it was the one requirement I made her agree to. Though I knew I couldn't drink, but to tell her what I was going to tell her, I didn't need us to bump into anyone we may know, so going somewhere new, seemed the perfect answer.
She sat patiently as I told her everything. Her calm façade never wavering, never once butting in, saving whatever questions she may have until I had explained the whole story. It was one of the things I loved about Angela, she never jumped to conclusions, always allowed a full explanation before giving her opinions.
"So you're going to...?" She asked once I had finished.
"That's the plan."
"Wow."
She sat for another minute, seemingly needing to process the abundance of information I had given her.
"And you're sure about this?"
"Never been surer." I told her.
"Well, I'm really happy for you. And you know me and Ben will help you with whatever you need right?"
I did quite often wonder what I would do without Angela in my life. Regardless of whether she thought what I was doing was a good or bad idea, she would always be one hundred percent supportive. She always had been.
For the next hour, we talked about the process, and what Emmett and Rose were like, before moving onto how my Dad had taken the news. She had known Charlie for as long as she had known me, which was pretty much my whole life, so she wasn't at all surprised when I told her of his reaction. She laughed even harder when I told her about taking him to meet the Cullen's, and even more so when I told her what I had been told about Emmett's nervousness.
"So the Cullen's, they're a nice family right?"
"Yeah, they are. You'll have to meet them at some point. Esme and Carlisle are like dream parents. They look at each other with such love, and I swear it's like looking at a couple of newly weds. It's really weird, they've been together going on thirty years or something, but looking at them, you'd swear they had only just realized how much in love they really are."
I could only hope that once I had found the right person, that we shared a similar love as Esme and Carlisle. It was certainly something to aspire to, that's for sure.
"Alice and Jasper, are like made for each other. Alice is like this little ball of hyperactive energy. It's tiring just watching her, but she has a heart of gold. And Jasper, he's like the super cool person, literally. He has this really weird way of making you feel at ease, even in the most strange circumstances. They compliment each other, he's the calm to her storm."
"And Emmett's other Brother?" Angela asked, taking a sip form her wine.
"Edward's... good looking, polite, he has this copper tinge to his hair, that never seems to be in order, but it still looks perfect on him. He has these shocking green eyes that feel like they are burning into your soul, reading your every thought. He seems pretty protective of his family, certainly gave me a hard enough time when he realized it was me that was going to be Emmett and Rose's surrogate."
"What do you mean 'when he realized it was me'?"
Shit. I hadn't actually told her about the fact I had met Edward previously. It was part of the whole story I hadn't felt needed to be told. I should have known Angela would be perceptive as hell, just like always. Why I thought I could ever get away with omitting details with her, I'd never know.
So clearly I had some explaining to do. It took another hour for me to explain everything that had happened from the moment I had met both Emmett and Edward that fateful night. The grin on her face just grew in size with every minute that passed, until I couldn't douse my curiosity any further.
"What are you smiling about?" I finally asked.
"Just you!" She replied as though it was the most obvious answer in the world.
"What about me?"
"Just you and the fact that you are so clueless."
"Um, thanks... I think." I said, even though I truly was none the wiser.
"You truly don't see it do you?"
"See what?"
It was like she was talking in riddles. Riddles only she knew the answer to.
"You'll see it when you're ready." She told me conspiratorially.
"Are your glasses ok? Because you're obviously seeing something I'm not."
She shook her head and laughed. For the rest of the night I would catch her giving me this odd look. Almost as though she was dying to tell me a secret, but couldn't. It was so unlike Angela.
Regardless of how odd the evening had turned out, it was still nice being able to spend time with her. We didn't spend nearly as much time together outside of work as I would like to. With promises that we should do this more often, and maybe next time with both Alice and Rose, we began gathering our belongings. Checking my phone for messages, as Angela pulled her jacket on, I noticed I had one missed call from Emmett and one message.
Without thinking I opened the message, expecting it to be from Emmett, explaining why he had called. It wasn't.
B - Enjoy yourself while you can, the opportunity won't be there for long xoxo
I spun around frantically, trying to see if I could see him. I knew it was him. It had to be. And whilst the message had been as cryptic as ever, it was almost as though he knew what I was doing, as though he could see me.
"Bella?" Angela asked worriedly.
"He's here." I whispered.
"What do you mean he's here, whose here?"
I had told her about James coming back into my life, and though she was anything but happy with the development, she trusted me when I told her that I was sorting it, that the police and my Dad both knew, and that I was keeping myself safe. I may have played it down some to her, I didn't want her to worry more than absolutely necessary, and I certainly didn't want to involve her in this whole mess.
"James." I whispered.
"Where?"
Angela spun around much like I had. It was doubtful that she would have seen him though, especially considering she had only ever seen a photograph of him. She had never had the pleasure of meeting him, he had never made a trip home with me, for an occasion.
She forced me to sit back down, after I told her I didn't know, and passed her my cell. She looked at the message, before pulling her own cell from her bag and calling Ben. I hated that she was involving herself and now Ben in this whole mess. I hated that there was a mess to begin with.
As we sat and waited for Ben to turn up, all I really wanted was to call Edward and tell him. Edward made me feel safe. It was like the whole world just went away when I was with him. He brought the old Bella out in me, the one that had been hidden by all my problems, the one who had left for Phoenix and never returned.
Fifteen minutes later, Ben arrived, giving me a tight hug. Like Angela I had known Ben for most of my life. He had been with Angela the day they collected me from the airport, and they had both gotten me through the following few days I had been back home. They had seen me at my worst, and had gotten me through worse, and I knew they would do anything they could to get me out of this mess.
"Bella, do you see him?" Ben asked quietly, obviously having been filled in by Angela while I had been spacing out.
I shook my head. I hadn't seen him, but this was James. He was evasive at best. I was in no doubt that he had seen me, maybe even followed me. Ben herded us both to the car, before taking me home, though neither he or Angela were happy with my decision. They both wanted me to go and stay with them for a few days, but I couldn't. I just wanted to try and continue as normal.
Again for the second night in a row, I slept very little, aware of every noise. It was almost like I was expecting James to appear at some point. Which is completely ridiculous, since I knew there was no way he could have gotten passed the door without being heard. Even if he had one of those skeleton keys, he wouldn't have gotten passed the dead bolt and the chain.
Angela insisted on carpooling to and from work with me, and when I had my appointments to attend she made sure to make me give her an approximate time frame of when I expected to get back home, and I had to call her the moment I was safely back in my apartment. I personally thought she was over doing it a little, but in honesty, I couldn't blame her. I knew if she was in my situation, I would be the exact same. So for now I placated her.
Emmett flipped his lid a few days later when he and Rose attended one of my appointments with me. We sat in the Doctors office awaiting my test results that would tell us whether I was a suitable for surrogacy. I hadn't wanted to get into it with them here, but when he had asked if I had received any more messages, I could only nod. Rose had gripped my hand tightly when I had told them about my night with Angela, whilst Emmett had paced erratically, only just managing to pull it together when the Doctor entered.
The news that I was suitable, lifted all of our moods immensely, but for me, James was always right there in the back of my mind. We booked an appointment for Monday of the following week to actually go through with the IVF treatment, and then we left.
They both walked me to my door, not a single word was spoken between us. Rose looked torn between who she felt the need to comfort the most. Me or Emmett. After a little more pacing from Emmett, they both, like Angela and Ben made me promise that if I ever had somewhere I needed to go, then I would call one of them to go with me. I wanted badly to laugh it off, and tell them to knock it off, but I couldn't I knew how serious this was getting.
They left after, though not before standing in the hallway and listening to me lock the door, and checking to make sure it was secure, I sat on the sofa staring out of the window at the Seattle skyline. It wasn't much of a view, considering I wasn't exactly in a pent house, and my building was surrounding by others, but what little view I had, was nice.
I wasn't sure how long I sat there, before my cell started ringing. I physically jumped at the sound, almost scared to pick it up incase it was James. It was only after a second when I realized that was what caller I.D was for, that I reached for it. The screen flashed Edward.
I knew immediately why he was calling, but since I hadn't spoken to him since the other night when we kissed, I wasn't sure how to act with him. Sure we had traded the odd text, but for the most part, we both seemed to be giving the other some space.
"Hello."
"Bella, hey it's um me, Edward." He sounded nervous somehow. "I um, I just spoke with Em, and he told me what happened. Are you ok?"
I have to admit, he was probably he first person that had actually asked me if I was ok. Everyone else seemed more concerned with James, which was ok, it was right to be concerned with him. But Edward question stumped me. Was I ok? I wasn't sure any more. Did I want to admit that I wasn't ok? No I didn't. But at the same time, I didn't think I had the energy to pretend any more. I was tired of running scared, but I was tired of fighting too. I just wanted it all to end.
"I don't know." Was about as honest as I could get.
"Can I do anything?"
Could he? Probably not, unless he had this great plan up his sleeve to get rid of James. The one thing I wanted though, wasn't something I could ask for. I wanted him to come over here, and just sit with me, to hold me and pretend that none of this was happening with me. I wanted to be wrapped up in his arms, and feel safe, and just forget about the world for a while.
"No, it's ok. Thank you though." Was my answer.
"You know where I am."
"I do."
The conversation was a little uncomfortable in light of what had happened last week, and I had no idea of how to fix it. It didn't help that I couldn't figure out whether he had kissed me last week because he had feelings for me, or whether it was just a spur of the moment mistake. I was too chicken to ask to find out though.
We ended our call shortly after that, having little to say to each other, and the awkwardness took over. I didn't want it to be like this between us. I had to figure out a way back to the easy camaraderie we had shared when we first met.
For the rest of the week, I did as I promised and made sure I always had someone to head to and from work with. It was a pain, but thankfully I didn't have to bother Emmett or Rose too much.
I saved myself some hassle over the weekend and stayed in. I got messages from practically everyone asking me if I wanted to go out with them, but I couldn't help but feel as though they were more pity invites than anything. I knew they most likely weren't, but it didn't stop me feeling that way.
I spent my weekend giving my apartment a good clean, sorted out my laundry ready to take at some point the following week, and eventually caught up on some work. By Sunday afternoon I began suffering with cabin fever, desperate to go out and get some air. Part of me wanted to be defiant and just go, by behaving like I was, James was winning, he was making my life a living hell. But the much more sensible part wouldn't allow it. There was more than just me to think about right now. Tomorrow I would be going through with the IVF and hopefully have a baby to care for, for the next nine months.
I hadn't heard anything from James since my night out with Angela, which was over a week ago. By no means was I getting complacent, but it had been well over a week now, and since meeting him at the bar, he hadn't ever left me alone this long. Maybe it was a whole false sense of security thing, who knows, but then maybe he truly had gotten bored by my lack of reaction.
Monday rolled around and Emmett and Rose picked me up just after lunch to go to my appointment with me. I was nervous, I didn't know why, but my stomach was in knots. Getting into the car with Emmett, Rose looked equally as nervous. She was pale, and looked dreadful. When I asked if she was ok, she waved me off, telling me she had some sort of stomach bug and hadn't been well all morning, but was feeling a little better now, but in no way was she missing this.
They both stayed with me in the room as we waited for the Doctor. Rose sat across the room from me, the colour slowly returning to her cheeks, though you could tell whatever it was had really knocked her on her ass. She was more concerned about not coming near me incase I caught whatever it was.
After the Doctor went through the last minute details, Em and Rose left me alone. The process having been explained, was quite straight forward. The embryo's were placed in my cervix by a syringe type of device. It was all quite quick and pain free. Slightly uncomfortable, but nothing too bad.
The Doctor's left soon after, leaving me alone with just a nurse who tried to make me comfortable. It wasn't easy in the stupid gown they had me wear. Once everything was cleaned up, they allowed Emmett and Rose to come back in to sit with me. I only had to stay for half a hour or so to just relax, as the Doctors preferred you to have a while before beginning to move around.
They both hovered over me, worrying about whether I was ok, and thanking me profusely for what I was doing. Though I didn't particularly like the attention they were both showering me with, I just tried to relax back into the bed and wait patiently for the Doctors go ahead to leave.
Twenty minutes later, the Doctor arrived a hand full of pamphlets. He explained I had to take it easy for a few days, and gave me what felt like a huge list of general advice. I had to continue taking the pills I had been given a few weeks back that were meant to help raise my fertility, as well as taking folic acid tablets. It more felt like a list of what not to do than anything though.
I had to make an appointment to come back in two weeks for the standard blood tests to check my pregnancy hormone level, but the Doctor did advise us that I could if I so chose, take a home pregnancy test whenever I felt ready, still reminding me, that it could take a few weeks, and even then since this was my first round of IVF, it might not have worked at all.
The news was a little disheartening, but we all decided on the way home that we would get together sometime over the weekend and take a test. It was hard not to get our hopes up, even though in our initial agreement, we had decided that we wouldn't go for any more than five rounds of treatment. It was all very daunting really.
The following few days, I went to work but took it easy. I was a little sore afterwards, but nothing unmanageable. My boss Jane now knew everything, and was surprisingly very supportive. She had spoken of her Sister who had used a surrogate for their youngest child, and couldn't speak more highly of her. Angela barely let me out of her sight, wouldn't let me do even the most basic of tasks. It was all starting to get a bit much.
I still hadn't heard anything from James, and was beginning to think he had given in. just the idea he had just gone away made me relax, all I had to do now was get everyone around me to do the same.
Edward as had become known, was as supportive as ever. It never felt like he was hovering over me. He sent me a message every morning asking how I was feeling, and offering his help in any way, but never once pressured me, or forced his presence in any way.
By Friday, I had, had enough of everyone treating me like a piece of glass. I loved Angela to bits, but she was constantly there whilst we were at work. Even a simple trip to the copy room was treat like a marathon. It was like she wasn't happy unless I was sat in my chair at my desk. Over lunch, she dropped me off in the break room, and despite my arguments to the contrary, she fled to go and pick our lunch up.
I needed to speak to someone who didn't treat me like an invalid. I needed to speak to Edward.
E - Can you do me a favour? - B xoxo
I wasn't expecting a reply immediately, thinking he was probably busy. He was running a huge corporation for goodness sake.
B - Anything! - E xoxo
E - Can you look up the word pregnant in the dictionary for me, and tell me if it mentions anything in regards to terminal illness or disability please - B xoxo
B - Friends still driving you mad? - E xoxo
E - I'm being a bitch aren't I? - B xoxo
B - Not at all. It's understandable. Come crash in my office with me. Dad's gone for the day, could use the company! - E xoxo
E - Don't tempt me - B xoxo
B - Wouldn't dream of it ;p - E xoxo
E - Angela's back with lunch. Thanks for cheering me up :) - B xoxo
B - Any time :D - E xoxo
It was amazing how a five minute conversation with him could cheer me up. Hell I hadn't even spoken to him, and he had pulled me out of my mood. He seemed to understand how I was feeling, how annoying the hovering was. I didn't know whether it was because he had learnt first hand, or whether he was just good at being sympathetic.
Regardless of how quickly Edward had cheered me up, Angela in record breaking time put me right back where I started from. I knew she was trying to be helpful and supportive, but when she placed my lunch in front of me, it was completely different to what I had asked for. Having seen the questioning look on my face, she explained that my order of chicken burger and fries which I had called through earlier, wasn't very healthy. So instead she had picked up a pasta salad for me.
That was surprisingly all it took for me to lose it. I tossed the packaged salad on the table in front of me, grabbed my cell before storming out of the room. I could hear Angela following behind me, calling my name worriedly.
"I'm sorry Jane, I have to leave." I told her as I popped my head around her door.
She simply nodded. She had noticed over the past week how stressed I was becoming by everyone's behaviour toward me, and she knew how much I needed to try to remain as relaxed as possible.
"Bella!" Angela shouted.
"I'm sorry Ang, I know you're only trying to be helpful, but honestly, you're all driving me crazy."
I immediately felt guilty. Her face fell into a frown. I didn't want to hurt her, or even come across as ungrateful, but I just needed to have some space. If this is what this was going to be like for the next nine months, then I was going to go crazy. It was too much, it all was.
"If you really want the burger, I can go back and get it for you."
"No, I'm sorry Ang, I just... I'm grateful for all you're doing, but I don't even know for sure I'm pregnant yet, and you're all treating me like this delicate doll. I just need you all to back off and treat me like normal. At least until I get too fat to be able to do anything for myself. Ok?"
She nodded forcing a smile as I pulled her into a hug, telling her I just needed to go home and relax. I reassured her I wasn't mad with her, just frustrated, and not just with her, with everyone. I didn't however tell her that, that didn't include Edward. I was seriously beginning to doubt if Edward could ever make me feel mad towards him.
After leaving work, I headed home, retreating straight away to my bathroom to have a nice soak in the tub. Only as I started filling the tub, there was no hot water. I growled in frustration, before throwing a sweater and jeans on and stomping my way down to the super's room to complain... again. As expected he wasn't in.
This did nothing but blacken my mood as I headed back to my apartment. I wrote a note of complaint to shove under his door, before writing a second that I would mail to the landlord. This had gone on long enough. If I wasn't being woken at ridiculous hours with banging pipes, I didn't have any hot water. I couldn't afford to move though, this was one of few half decent places I could afford, and believe me, I had looked. I still looked even now, keeping my eyes on the classifieds week after week.
Deciding to put my anger and frustrations to good use, I spent the next few hours cleaning my apartment, sorting my laundry ready for the next available chance I had to go and do it, as well as answering calls from Angela who wanted to make sure I had made it home ok, and both Emmett and Rose wanting to just check in.
By the time I had finished, my apartment was spotless, not that it was dirty or anything before, but it was nice to see my hours of hard work had paid off. I think if it hadn't been noticeable, my mood would have plummeted straight back down to the negative end of the spectrum.
Sitting on the couch, I felt an odd craving for chocolate or ice cream. Something sweet. It was odd, usually I craved savoury items. Maybe this was a sign. Either way, I wouldn't allow myself to get my hopes up, we had be warned what felt like a hundred times, that it can often take a few attempts before the results are positive.
A craving was a craving though, and it was definitely something I would have to get used to. And since I had nothing to placate my sudden sweet tooth, a trip to the local store was a must. Again something I was sure I would have to get used to. I had read about women craving odd things in the early hours of the mornings or late at night. Except I had no-one to drive around at two am to fetch whatever it was I wanted. The life of a single Mom, except I wasn't the Mom.
I grabbed my purse on my way out of the door, posting the letter under the super's door, as I headed to the local store. I posted my letter to the landlord, before heading inside, planning on buying myself a big tub of ice cream and some chocolate, to drown my sorrows in considering alcohol was now out of the question.
It just felt as though everything was going wrong at once. Like I couldn't catch a break. I knew one thing was certain, and it was that I had to try to relax a little more. Things were only going to get more hectic over the coming months if I got pregnant. I'd already been warned by my Doctor at one of my previous appointments that I was more likely to feel stress whilst pregnant, in fact all my emotions would be heightened, as if they weren't already.
I must have stood for a good ten minutes in the frozen section, contemplating which flavour I wanted, before deciding Neapolitan had the three flavours I was wanting most. I hadn't even gotten off the aisle before I turned around and picked up a second tub, just to be on the safe side.
Along with my ice cream and bag of chips, which once I walked passed, I couldn't resist, I headed back for home. The skies had darkened some from heavy rain clouds, though thankfully they were far enough away that I felt sure I would be back home before any rain fell.
"Isa! Fancy seeing you here!"
I stopped dead in my tracks. The one voice I had thought, hoped I had heard the last of. The voice I hadn't counted on hearing when I set off out this evening.
"James." I fought to keep my voice steady, not even giving him the benefit of looking at him.
I began walking again, trying, pleading with myself to keep my walk calm and confident. Just keep walking my brain chanted over and over. I fought desperately against myself to break into a run. Pointless really. If he wanted, he would easily outrun me, that's if I didn't fall and knock myself out first, which lets face it, was more probable than anything else.
I took a mental inventory of anything I had that could be used as a weapon, where my cell was, and where I could see the nearest people. I was about three maybe four blocks from home, a woman on a cell about four hundred yards ahead of me, of course my luck would have her walking with her back to me. I daren't turn around to check for people behind me, in fear of seeing James.
"Isa, Isa, Isa, that's no way to treat me surely. After all I did for you, after all you did to me."
He was right behind me. The hair on the back of my neck bristled. I bit my tongue from replying to him. Antagonising him was the last thing I needed to do right now. Just keep walking, just keep walking, the chanting continued. I tried to pick my pace up without it being too noticeable.
"Ah ah ah Isa, no running this time." I felt him grab my arm and pull me back.
He spun me to face him, and I dropped my bag in the process. It didn't matter, any craving for ice cream that I had, had was long gone by now. Fear had gladly taken it's place.
"What do you want?" I hoped and prayed I came across stronger than I felt.
"I want to ruin your life the way you ruined mine." He hissed in my face.
I could smell the stench of stale alcohol, and what I thought was cannabis. Which was highly probable, after all this was James. I wouldn't be at all surprised if there wasn't something much stronger in his system.
"You ruined it yourself." I snapped back.
He roughly pushed me into the brick wall behind me. My head banged against it, a dull throbbing appearing immediately. His face appeared a mere inch away from mine. His eyes black, which was most likely his pupil fully dilated, his nostrils flared with each breath. His hands were pushing my shoulders against the wall. It hurt, more than you can imagine, but in honesty, the pain was nothing compared to fully fledged fear I felt pump through my veins.
"Not so strong without your little posse of friends are you?"
He continued his tirade, voicing his ideas on what he was going to do to me. None of it registered though. My head was throbbing, I knew I had a cut on the back of my head, I could smell the metallic aroma of blood, my stomach doing flip flops. Small black spots started entering the corner of my vision. I couldn't be sure whether it was due to a concussion, the adrenalin rushing through my body, or the fact I was close to passing out due to the blood. I hoped beyond hope that it wasn't the latter. Fainting wasn't going to help me at all at this point.
Trying to concentrate on how to get myself out of this, rather than the pain I was feeling, and the black spots that were getting larger by the minute. Looking both ways up and down the street, there was no-one to come to my rescue. I was on my own. I just had to figure out a way of distracting him, and taking my chances at running. I may not get away from him fully, but hopefully I could make it closer to the end of the street, where the chances of someone hearing my screams grew.
My mind flitted through all the self defence classes that my Dad had forced me through. I may not have used them back in Phoenix, but they were my only hope now. I raced through the memories of each class, struggling to remember the ways we had been taught to disarm an attacker. There was only one way I could think.
Waiting for the perfect moment, the moment to catch him off guard. Waiting for him to take a breath from his constant diatribe, to catch a breath. He finally paused. Putting all my strength into, I raised my right knee, connecting with his crown jewels. Air gushed from between his lips, as he doubled over in pain. I stepped from in front of him, I knew the pain wouldn't hold him at bay for long. I had to take every opportunity as they came to slow him down. I picked up and swung my grocery bag, allowing it to connect soundly in his face. He stumbled backwards, collapsing in a heap on the floor, coughing and spluttering.
Without allowing myself to feel the guilt of what I had done, I dropped the bag and took off in a run toward home. I have never run so fast in my life, people actually jumped out of my way on the sidewalk as I barrelled through them. Never once did I look back, scared I suppose that I would find James sprinting after me.
Within the space of minutes, I ploughed toward the front door of my apartment building. My hands shaking, barely able to push my key into the lock. My heart was beating heavily, through exertion, fear and adrenalin. I wanted, so desperately to feel safe now I was back home, but I couldn't.
"ISA!" The voice I feared the most yelled, just as I stepped into the foyer.
Letting out a scream, I managed to slam the door before he got entrance, and again took off running up the stairs. I knew it was only time now before either someone let him in, or he broke in himself. Tiredness began to appear as I stumbled a few times up the six flights on stairs. My knees and shins would be covered in bruises. A small price to pay however compared to the bruises I would receive at the hands of James if he got to me. Hell who knew if he'd stop there.
Finally reaching my floor, I ran to my door, banging into it, as I forced my hands to remain steady as I opened the locks. It didn't help that I could now hear growling coming from the stairwell. I managed to get inside before I caught sight of James, or even before I heard him reach my floor. I didn't care though, I slammed the door behind me, snapping the dead bolt into place, locking the main lock, and pushing the chain into place. I slid down the door, breathing heavily. I was on the verge of a panic attack, and my exertion was not helping with keeping my breathing calm.
A thud on my door caused me to yelp. I couldn't move, if anything I thought my weight would help prevent him from attempting to break it down. I needed help. I knew I did. I fumbled into my pocket for my cell, pulling it out, and with shaking hands, I managed to scroll through my last called list for Emmett.
"Hey B, hows it going? To what do I owe the pleasure?" He sounded so cheerful.
"ISA!" James bellowed.
"Bella?" Emmett asked worriedly.
"Em... Emmett you... you have to... help me!" I whispered through my panting breaths.
"Bella where are you Hun?" I could hear the fear in his voice.
"M... my place."
"ISA! I swear if you don't let me in, I'm gonna break the damn door in."
"Rose call Edward, get him over to Bella's now. James is there." I heard him tell Rose. "Bella, Hun, Rose is calling Edward now, he's gonna be there in minutes. I need you to make sure all the locks on the door are locked, go to your windows, and lock all them before closing the blinds, then go into your bathroom and lock yourself in there until one of us come get you ok. Don't leave the bathroom for anything ok." His voice was strangely calm as he told me what to do.
"He's on his way. I'll call the cops too." I heard Rose tell him.
He relayed the message from Rose, as he told me to stay on the line, and passed the phone to Esme and Carlisle. Carlisle talked me through locking all the windows, and closing the blinds, before again telling me to go into the bathroom and locking myself in there. Once he was sure I was safely locked away, he turned his concern into how bad my breathing had become. Telling me to talk him through how I was feeling, where I was hurt. With his soothing voice I began to slow my breathing to a calmer rate, the black spots in my vision, getting a little smaller. I was still shaking fiercely though, my arm aching from the grip I was having to exert to keep the phone in my hand through the shaking.
Glass smashing sounded throughout the apartment. I bit my lip hard to prevent from screaming. I knew it was James, and the last thing I needed was for him to find me easier because of my screams. Carlisle again came to my rescue, speaking softly to keep me calm, it didn't help much though when I could hear the strain in his voice.
I dropped the phone to my side as I pushed myself further into the corner, pulling my knees up to my chest, curling as tightly into a ball as I could. Wanting desperate for the ground to swallow me up, if nothing to just get away from James. I could still hear both Carlisle and now Esme talking to me, trying to get me to breath along with their counting. I was past that point though now.
"Isa, I know you're in there." James voice sung.
I heard a crack, quickly followed by a bang. That was all I could take, as I allowed the darkness to sweep over me, convinced that he had broken through the flimsy lock of the bathroom door.
Ohhhh I wonder what harm will James do? Please review for me, I really do appreciate your feedback and remember 20 reviews means an update :D