J is for Jobs

"Hey Lawrence!"

"Uhh...hi Adam. Listen, about tonight..."

Lawrence heard Adam groan down the phone. "Aww maan, you're working late AGAIN?"

Lawrence leaned back in the swivel chair behind his desk. "Looks like it, the hospital's been pretty busy recently."

"But it's been so BORING since Hoffman got better: he won't even let us on Mariocart just 'cos of that little matter of the 'Cake Torment' thing..."

"Sorry about that, man." Lawrence heard a knock on his door, muttered a quick "Gotta go, see you later." and opened the door. "What?"

"Ah, Dr Gordon." A nurse smiled brightly at him. "A girl's down on the second floor with sprained ligaments, can you come down and help us out?"

"Why do I need to help?" Lawrence scowled. "I'm not even in that department!"

"Well, she doesn't like Zepp very much...he isn't helping with her fear of hospitals very much."

"I can imagine." Lawrence made his way downstairs and went to the room indicated by the nurse – just in time to see Zepp jumping out of a cupboard with a sheet over his head. The girl screamed.

"Zepp, get the fuck out of here." Lawrence glared as Zepp tripped over the edge of his sheet.

"But I'm trying to make her laugh!" Zepp whined.

"OUT." Zepp left, muttering to himself.

Lawrence turned back to the girl. "Sorry about that, he gets a bit...mad sometimes."

The girl laughed. "Oh, don't worry: Aims gets like that all the time."

"Aims?" Lawrence face palmed. "You don't know Amy, do you?"

"Hell yeah I do!" She looked him up and down. "And I don't remember her saying she knew a fit guy..."

Oh, dear Lord. Lawrence tried to ignore the fact she was checking him out. "Ok, you're mum should be here soon, so – "

"You going out with anyone?" She interrupted him.

"Uhh..." Lawrence sensed an awkward moment coming up. "Actually, I'm – "

And then Hoffman came in. For once in his life, Lawrence was actually glad to see the detective. He had a fat lip and there was murder in his eyes. "Lawrence, is Zepp on duty right now?"

Lawrence shrugged. "He was in here a few minutes ago, but I don't know where he went after that. Why do you want to see him?"

"The bastard told Amanda I was cheating on her for a laugh...she hit he in the face with some fucking massive saucepan, I don't even remember owning that thing!" He then noticed the girl, and suddenly grinned in what was clearly meant to be a sexy way. "Why hello..."

"And Zepp was lying, was he?" Lawrence said sarcastically.

Hoffman ignored him. "So, what's your name?"

"Shannon." The girl replied. "And are you trying to hit on me or something?"

"Uhh...no?"

"Good, 'cos I'm sorry but I don't care what Amy says, you're fugly."

"OHHHHH, REJECTED!" Zepp stuck his head round the door, laughing. "Hoffman, you aren't very good at picking up woman are you? Although the way you're going, you'd probably have a heart attack trying – "

"ZEPP HINDLE, GET YOUR ARSE OVER HERE RIGHT NOW!" Seeing the look on Hoffman's face, Zepp sprinted from the room, Hoffman hot on his heels.

"Sooo..." Shannon fluttered her eyelashes at him. "Are you dating any girls?"

"Uhh, not really," Lawrence heard a crash in the hall and some muffled swearing – Hoffman had caught up with Zepp. "You see, I'm – "

"Ahh, that's good." Shannon smiled brightly and reached for her crutches. She tried to get up and fell over. "FUCK...how the hell do you use these things?"

"Here, let me help you." Lawrence stood up and bent over to help her up, and two things happened at that point.

One: She kissed him.

And Two: Adam walked in.

The two men stared at each other in silence, and then –

"LAWRENCE, GORDON, YOU ARSEHEAD!" Adam slapped Lawrence round the face.

"Adam, it's not what it looks like – " Lawrence started, and then Adam slapped him again.

Zepp and Hoffman peeped round the door. "Hey, uhh...what's going on?" Hoffman asked, looking confused.

"That bastard over there," Adam pointed at Lawrence. "Just cheated on me."

"Wait a sec," Shannon turned to Lawrence. "You're gay?"

"Yes!" Adam crossed his arms across his chest. "And he just happens to be my boyfriend!"

"Ohh," Light dawned on Shannon's face. "Yeah, Amy did say something about there being a gay couple...she thought you're good for each other by the way."

"Yeah...well..." Adam gave up being angry and helped Lawrence up. "Sorry, man."

"Yeah, no problem. Anyway, why are you here?"

"Looks like the show's over." Zepp commented. And dived for the door, closely followed by Hoffman again.

Adam looked sheepish. "Well, I know you work overtime loads, and...I don't like being away from you. I came here to help out so you can get home quicker."

Lawrence smiled and tousled his hair. "You idiot. Well, I suppose most of the paperwork can wait till tomorrow."

"Cool." As the two men walked out of the room, Shannon stood up with a bit of difficulty.

"Uhh...what about me?"

"Don't worry," Adam said as he closed the door. "We called some of your friends too..."

The door remained closed for about two seconds before two people cart wheeled in wearing Jedward quiffs and matching suits. "ICE ICE BABY!"

"Oh my God." Shannon smacked her head against the wall.

"Hey Shaz, wazzup?" Kat asked cheerfully. "Hey, guess who I met?"

"Kat," Amy took of her aviator sunglasses. "I let you out of the bathroom for good behaviour, don't ruin this."

"Guys, what about me?" Izzy walked in looking upset. "You didn't leave me a costume!"

"Sorry Izzy, Shaz doesn't really know you." Kat grinned. "You wanna see our routine to 'Under Pressure'?"

"I hate hospitals." Shannon pulled the covers of the bed over her head.

I did promise myself not to put any more of my friends in this, but my friend really did sprain ligaments in her leg etc, so she needs a laugh. Get better soon, Shaz!