A/N: Guess who's back, back again. Shonagh's back, tell a friend :) sorry for the wait guys I have been super busy with my (non existent) social life. HAHAHAHAHAHA no. I actually just got some new books so…. yeah. Random Curious Author Question: based on this story, how old do you think I am?

When Jace announced that it was time for lunch, I knew that I could no longer put off the inevitable. Jace and his family had been so kind to me, the least I could do was give them an explanation. However, the knowledge that they deserved this did nothing to tame the growing fire of anxiety building up in my chest. I had never told any one. Ever. What if I was too far gone to be saved?

All these thoughts and more were whizzing round my head like a wildfire as Jace lead me through the gorgeous twisting hallways. I was snapped out of my thoughts by the voices emitting from a large door way that we had stopped in front of. I couldn't quite make out what the voices were saying, but I was pretty sure it was about me. The slight tighten of Jaces facial muscles only confirmed my suspicions. Great. So now I got to step into a room where not only was I going to be endlessly questioned, no, as if that wasn't enough, now me and my FREAKING FABULOUS luck gets to walk into a room full of people that are already talking about me. Lucky me.

Sensing my internal panic attack, Jace squeezed my hand slightly. I'm sure this gesture was meant to reassure me but it just made me think of how much I had to lose. What if I relayed my story to the Lightwoods and Jace was disgusted with how weak and pathetic I am? I can't lose him now. I haven't known him for more than 5 days but he made me feel safe and loved and important. He saved me, and there was no way I was ever going to repay that. But what if he realised just how much better he could do? And Izzy, she is my best friend. I just can't lose her. She has helped me through so much and I would still be the same broken little girl without her. I loved her like she was my sister. Screw that, she was my sister, God had just skipped ver that particular bond and given us a much stronger friendship. And Alec, though we weren't particularly close, he had always been so sweet and respectful and ind around me. He was such a genuinely good person. And excitable little Max, who I took out for comics when he was doing good at school. I don't know if I will be able to handle the look in his eyes when I tell him. Even their parents, they've been so kind and gracious to me, their hospitality seems to be never ending. Just a few months ago, I had nothing too lose, I would have killed myself in an instant. But now, there was so much more to my life and I wasn't ready to let that go. Not now, not ever.

Oblivious to my mind panic, Jace had opened the door, and while tears had filled my eyes at the mere thought of this incredible family, here they all were before me, looking at me with varied expressions. Sympathy, caution and flat out worry. They sit staring at me for what feels like several lifetimes, but was probably only a few seconds. Izzy is the first to move, slowly scraping her chair across the floor as she stands. She walks over to me and I can see the tears in her eyes threatening to pour over in a waterfall of sadness. When she reaches me, her voice comes out in barely a whisper.

" Oh, Clary."

And then she's hugging me, in a bone crushing embrace. I hug her back just as hard and I don't ever want to let go because she's my rock and I cant let that go. To let that go would be to untie my rope to sanity, and I'm not ready to do that. Not yet. Tears are pouring down our faces, flooding us but we still don't let go. The only sound in the room is our sniffles.

After about 10 minutes, we let go. There are tear streaks down her face and we both probably look like pandas but in that moment I dont give a damn. My best friend doesn't hate me.

Maryse clears her throat.

" Clary, dear. I understand if you don't want to talk to us right now, but can I at least offer you something to eat?" I have a feeling that the knot of anxiety clogging my stomach will make it impossible to eat, so I shake my politely.

" No thank you, Maryse. But I will talk to you all, if you'd like to hear my story. I think you deserve it after all you've done for me."

Jace squeezes my hand slightly, and when no one protests, I go on.

" As you might have deduced, my father and brother abuse me. They have done so since my mother left. I'm not sure, but I think my father abused her as well. I never told any one because they terrified me. I was just a little girl, I didn't know that what they were doing to me was wrong. I always thought that I had been bad or disobedient in some way. I believed everything they said, that I was stupid and a horrible person and that I didn't deserve to be loved. I wasn't sure who I hated more, myself or them. No one knew, I don't think any one had ever suspected. If Jace hadn't found me, then I don't know how much longer it would've have gone on for. I'm sorry. I'm so, so sorry. I'll understand if you wish me to leave." The tears were flowing freely down my face now, and out of the corner of my eye, I could see the paleness of Jaces face and the tears trapped in his eyes.

" Clary, we aren't going to ask you to leave. I don't understand why you're apologising, you haven't done anything wrong. Do you hear me? It wasnt your fault! Alec and Isabelle have already set up one of the spare rooms for you. You are part of the family Clary. Never forget that." She came over and hugged me. I was so grateful, but my mouth couldn't seem to form the words of appreciation. Alec and his sparkly boyfriend, Magnus, came up to me next.

"Oh, biscuit. I can't believe you didn't tell anyone! Clary, I'm here to talk if you need to." Magnus gave me a quick hug, as did Alec. I nodded my gratitude at them. I was so happy that this amazing family didn't hate me. But Jace was yet to speak.