I had no idea where I was running to. My determination to find Edward was the only thing which compelled me to keep going. Cal had called after me, urging for me to come back to him. I knew that I couldn't escape him forever. He would find me, he always did, but I had to try and get away from him.

A moment of coherence came over me. How foolish was I being? How silly was I? I had known Edward but a week. I had no idea who he was, yet I was willing to leave my brother behind for him. I was willing to throw everything away for him. I did not love him. I could not love him.

The thought made me laugh as I pushed past people who continued to stare at me, wondering what I could find so entertaining in this time of madness. Keeping my mouth shut was difficult as I jumped up some steps to get a better view. There were multiple men in white suits who were directing first class passengers to life boats.

I saw some blonde hair in the distance as he helped an elderly woman on a boat. I pushed past the people, assuring them that I was not waiting for a boat. I was not leaving without him. I knew that much. The thought did make me feel sick for a moment. Rose had told me that there were not enough boats for all the people on the ship. Some would die if no one found us in the middle of the ocean.

I knew how protocol went. Women and children went first. Men went second. Staff were last.

I pushed the though aside as I came face to face with Edward. He looked startled for a moment as my hands wrapped around his upper arms. He looked down to me as the other workers helped to load the boats. His eyes widened as he took hold of my hand and pulled me to one side in the darkness.

"What are you doing here?" he wondered, pulling the white jacket he wore from his arms. He pushed it around my shoulders, his large hands running up and down my arms in a feeble attempt to warm me up. "You should be queuing for a boat. You should be with your brother."

"I want nothing to do with Cal," I shook my head back and forth, assuring Edward that Cal was not important to me at that moment in time. "He lied to me. I came to find you. I am not leaving this ship without you, Edward. We'll go away and find a way to survive together."

"Emily," he whispered, moving his hand out to cup my cheek. I felt his hand curve around my waist as he brought me closer to him and rested his chin on top of my head. My own arms snaked around his midriff as I buried my face into his chest.

"I'm serious, Edward," I promised him. "I cannot do this without you. I cannot leave you on this ship...going back with Cal is not an option."

"You don't need to go back with him," he assured me. "But you need to get off this ship. It is sinking, Emily. You get off this ship and you make something of yourself. You're an intelligent girl. You do not need a man to support you."

"I know," I said to him, pulling back slightly and looking up to his eyes. "But I do need to make sure that you get out of this alive."

"You owe me nothing," he assured me. "You gave me a better chance at living by saving me from the cell which I was in. Now I will help you. Wait for the next boat and get on it."

"No," I shook my head. "How can you ask me to do that?"

"Easily," Edward promised me. "Do it, Emily."

"Ah, Miss Hockley."

I winced as I heard Lovejoy speak. I cursed him in my head, wondering how he had managed to find me so quickly. I had hoped that I had managed to keep myself hidden from him.

"Your brother is quite worried. It would be really good of you to return to him."

"I'm not going back to Cal," I shook my head, my adamant attitude remaining intact. "I want nothing to do with Cal. Go back and tell him like the good delivery dog you are."

A flicker of anger etched its way across Lovejoy's face. I said nothing as Lovejoy grabbed my wrist and began to drag me from Edward. He acted quickly, taking hold of my other wrist and drawing me back to him. I winced at the sudden tug of war which was happening.

"Don't touch her," Edward growled lowly to Lovejoy. "No one is to touch her and hurt her. Do you understand me?"

"Who the hell do you think you are?" Lovejoy wondered from him. "You're a waiter and nothing more. Mr Hockley already knows how you intend to take his sister from him. He has seen it happen before. Unfortunately for you, Miss Hockley will be going nowhere with you."

"I know that," Edward hissed. "She is to get off this boat as soon as possible, but not with you dragging her away."

"You really are naive," Lovejoy said. "Now come along, Miss Hockley. Miss DeWitt Bukater and her mother are waiting for a boat on the deck below."

"I will wait here," I said, knowing that I was doing all that I could to get away from him.

"I think not," he replied, his head shaking back and forth. "If you are so for your serving boy coming with us, then allow him. He shall not be getting on a boat."

"Fine," Edward agreed to that command.

Lovejoy began to move off with Edward forcing me to move. His arm was wrapped around my waist as he dragged me through the crowds. I looked up at him as he made sure people didn't bump into us.

"I'm not going," I challenged him.

"Yes, you are," he replied. "You will not die on this ship. You will not die in the cold here. Go with Rose and her mother."

"No...what about you?" I whispered. "How can I live with myself? Knowing that I got off and hundreds of others...they will perish...how can I live with myself knowing that?"

"You have to," Edward whispered back. "You have no other choice, Emily. This is not where you are going to die. I am sure of it."

"Oh God," I whispered as we walked down the steps to the next deck. Lovejoy parted the crowds, allowing us to follow suit as we moved nearer to Cal. I saw him turn around as a look of anger took hold of his face. I looked around as he pushed forwards towards me. Surely I had not created this much anger within him.

"What is it?" I asked him as Edward kept his tight grip on me.

"My fiancée," Cal spat. "She ran away. She ran off to go and be his whore! Jack Dawson! A man who cannot give her what she needs! She left without another word."

"Where?" Lovejoy wondered.

"I'm assuming down the ship. Go and find her."

"It is sinking," Lovejoy complained. "It is too dangerous to go decks below."

"Well...do something!" Cal snapped, his arms flapping by his side in frustration. He rested a hand over his temple before looking at me, a smirk falling on his face as he did so. "Are you happy now?"

"What?" I wondered from him. "Why would I be happy? The ship is sinking."

"You thought I deserved this," Cal said. "Rose said you knew all along about how she never wanted me. You were waiting for the day that she said to me...waiting for me to suffer..."

"You don't know what you're talking about," I assured him. "You're looking like a fool, Cal. What are you going to do? Are you going to find her and force her to marry you? That is assuming she doesn't run off with Jack first."

"Oh, and you really are loving this," Cal informed me.

I shook my head, moving from Edwards grasp to grab onto my brother's lapels, shaking him slightly.

"I don't like any of this," I promised him. "None of this is ideal for any of us. But...Cal...if Rose does not love you then you cannot force her to do anything. Don't torture her further. Leave her be to make her own way."

"And what about you?" Cal asked. "You need to get on a boat."

"No," I shook my head, reaching behind me for Edward's hand. Cal saw the motion and ran a hand over his chin. He shook his head back and forth, closing his eyes as he did so. "I cannot go...I will wait...there has to be other boats..."

"There are no boats for me," Edward promised me simply. "Your brother is right. You need to get on a boat. You need to go."

"Well there are no boats on this side of the deck," Cal said with a shake of his head. "They have all been allocated."

"What about the other side?" I wondered from him. "Are there any there?"

"I assume so," Cal said, offering me his arm.

I looked at him with disregard for a moment. I hated Cal for what he had done. I hated what he had become. But he was my brother. He was my elder brother. That had to count for something. I turned to look at Edward for a moment and he smiled down at me. His hand moved out to tuck a strand of hair behind my ear.

"Go," he urged me. "I have a job to do. Go and do all that you should do."

"Come with me," I urged him. "Please, Edward...at least try. You can row a boat."

"I am not an officer in command," he shook his head.

"I can manage an agreement," Cal suddenly spoke up, his eyes glaring at Edward for a second. "I have enough money to buy one of the officers. I can get him on a boat if he means that much to you. Besides, I suppose I am in debt to him after my earlier performance."

"You're going to buy your way out of this?" I checked with Cal. "Like you buy your way out of everything?"

"If it saves him, then why should you care?" Cal asked from me. "It should not matter, Emily. Now come along. You need to be going, don't you?"

"See?" Edward checked with me. "Your brother has a plan. Everything shall be fine."

"But...what if it doesn't work out? What if-"

Edward cut me off from my worries, his mouth descending to cover mine as I closed my eyes and allowed him to wrap his arms around my waist. I moved closer to him, kissing him with as much force as I could muster. I groaned against him for a second before he pulled away from me and looked down at me for a second.

"You're an amazing gal, Miss Emily," he assured me.

I stroked his cheek softly. "I'll be with you. I promise...I will stay with you."

"Always," he smiled back and looked across to Cal. "Come on, we need to go."

"I don't appreciate you frolicking with my sister in front of me," Cal grunted to Edward.

"Is now the time to worry about that?" I asked my brother as we moved down the deck. There were still some boats left on the deck. Nowhere near enough for everyone to get off safely.

"Emily!"

I looked around before I noted Rose rushing up to me. Her clothes were soaking wet and her hair was stuck to her pale face. She looked an absolute mess in front of me. I took of the jacket which Edward had given me before passing it to her. I wrapped it around her fragile form as Jack stood behind her. I could sense Cal's anger between us, but said nothing.

"Get on the boat," Cal suddenly said.

I turned around to notice that it was the last one in the line of them on the deck.

"No," Rose snapped at him. "I am going nowhere without Jack."

"It doesn't matter," Jack promised her as he stepped closer to her.

Cal suddenly removed his coat and handed me it, his eyes not once leaving Rose. I wondered if he did love her. I wondered if he truly cared for her, or whether he wanted her for her beauty.

I could never tell with Cal. But I did see the hurt in his eyes at that moment in time. I saw it without a doubt.

"No, it does matter," Rose complained as I felt Edward grab my hand again.

"Cal has an arrangement," I said suddenly to Rose. "He will take Jack with Edward. He will make sure they get on a boat."

She regarded me with caution, truly not sure whether Cal would save them. I had faith in him. I didn't know why I believed my brother. He had given me no reason to believe him. He had done everything to go against me. But...lives were at stake. Cal had to be telling the truth, didn't he? He couldn't be so cold. He said that he owed Edward. He was right. He had to do this for him.

"Emily speaks sense for once," Cal assured Rose, daring to tuck a strand of her hair behind her ear. "I have an arrangement in progress. Mr Dawson here can benefit from it. The boat is just on the deck above. But...you need to get on this boat with Emily. It is for women and children."

Hesitance struck me as Edward took hold of me by the waist and pushed me backwards. I looked at him with reluctance for a moment as he kissed me again. I closed my eyes for a second, trying my best not to cry in front of him.

"Promise me you will get off of here," I urged him.

"I will do my best," he promised softly, kissing the top of my head after a moment. "That is all I can do for you."

I nodded in content before looking at Cal who stood beside me. Jack was forcing Rose into the boat as Cal began to do the same for me.

"Promise me, Cal," I urged him. "Promise me that you will get off safely with Edward."

I looked into his eyes as he blatantly studied mine. He kept silent for a few seconds before nodding once.

"I know I have hurt you," he spoke. "I want to make it up to you, Emily. I want to make sure I do that. I will make sure he gets off this ship. I promise."

A moment of doubt came into my mind, but I pushed it away as the boat shuddered. Cal grabbed my hand and helped to lift me into the lifeboat. I looked back for a second as Edward stood beside Jack, a lazy grin on his face as he winked at me. He was trying to be brave, I knew that. He was trying to show me that he would be safe.

Glancing back at Cal, I looked at him as he nodded before muttering to Edward and Jack.

"Do you think there is an arrangement?" Rose asked me.

I said nothing for a second.

"Cal wouldn't lie," I whispered. "He wouldn't lie about something like this."

"Wouldn't he?" Rose wondered as the boat began to lower. "I don't trust him, Emily. I don't trust anything about him."

"He is my brother," I replied. "I know what he has done...but...death...no...I refuse to believe Cal is that cold."

"He had Edward locked up. He had Jack locked up too. He framed both of them. He is cold enough."

"No," I said adamantly. Why did I refuse to let go of Cal? Why did I refuse to see the worst in him? "He wouldn't. He can't."

"I can't do it, Emily," Rose spoke. "I can't go...knowing that Jack could...he...I love him...I love him more than I love Cal."

"Rose, Jack will be fine...I promise you..."

"No, you don't know. No one does," she said and stood up.

I shrieked as she rocked the boat and reached the edge of it.

"Rose!" I cried out as she jumped from the side of the lifeboat, her arms holding onto the side of the ship. I continued to yell as I moved too, reaching for the side of the ship. How could I be so selfish to leave Edward? Rose was committing the ultimate selfless act.

I pushed her feet up, making sure she tumbled back to the safety of the deck before I reached to wrap my hands around the wooden railings.

"No!" a voice yelled down to me. I looked up as the boat continued to drop, making it impossible for me to follow Rose in her escape attempt. "Emily! No! You will stay in that boat, do you understand me?"

Edward's gaze was stern and fixed on mine as I watched him and the boat continued to move downwards. Someone took hold of my arm and forced me to sit back down as I refused to look away from Edward. He was leaning right over the edge before he moved away and began to mess around with his pocket. He pulled out his red book and dropped it down the side of the ship. I reached for it and it fell into my lap.

His book of tales.

I ran my hand over the cover before looking at him, wondering what I could say to him. I would see him again. I had to see him again. But why would he give me his book? Why would he give me it if he knew Cal had an arrangement?

It made no sense.

I recalled Cal muttering to Jack and Edward and thought of Rose's disbelief in my brother. Had she been right? The look in Edward's eyes told me enough as I stifled a sob, my hand covering my mouth as Edward pressed his fingers to his lips and blew me a kiss. No. How could he have done this? How could he have been so callous?

"No," I whispered. "No...he can't..."

"Sh, dear," a woman next to me said. "Don't get hysterical. Crying will achieve nothing."

The lifeboat finally hit the water as Edward remained stood where he was. I could have sworn I saw his eyes glistening before I yelled at him with all my might.

"Go!" I called out. I didn't want him to stand there and watch me. "Do something! Edward! Go! Please...I...I need you!"

"Love, calm down," the woman said again.

Edward looked back at me as he made a small salute. I saw him stand tall and move off before I yelled out to him. I yelled the three words which I never thought I would say. The three words which I had never said before. I didn't know if I believed myself until I had spoken them. But he didn't turn around.

He didn't hear me and the guilt began to eat me up again as the sobs came out freely.