Part 10

"Well, as I was rebuilding the engine I had a lot of time survey the tiny planet. I hope the research will be a valuable addition to the Starfleet database," Picard jests good-naturedly.

A few days after he had been discovered unconscious in the drifting wrecked shuttle, they had organized an informal dinner in the Captain's mess for the senior staff. Picard had remained in their cabin throughout the last few days, and Beverly had restricted access to him to members of the crew. He was still recovering physically and psychologically, and he required time to rest and reacclimatize to life on the starship, she had insisted. She had not wanted visitors in and out of the cabin when he needed to recuperate. It had been a severe shock to the children to be reunited with their deceased father, but they are now readjusting to having him back in their lives, and his presence is more than welcomed.

"The archaeologist in you must have been happy," laughs Geordi.

Picard shifts Isabel in his lap. Although he is still eating his dinner at the table with their guests and it would not be considered proper etiquette for the eight year-old to be sitting in his lap, the children have been experiencing severe separation anxiety. Neither Isabel or Jean-Paul want to leave the side of the father they have so recently been reunited with. While Deanna's delivery is imminent and she is supposed to be on bed rest, she has spent a great deal of time counselling the Picards over the last few days.

Picard lets out a long breath. "It was…distracting. It was something to do. When the time seemed endless and all I could do was wait. I wasn't happy, no. It was cold. I was miserable. Every day I would think, 'Oh, right now I'd be on watch on the Bridge, or now I'd be dropping by Engineering and reviewing the status report with La Forge. I'd wonder where the Enterprise was, if everything was proceeding as normal."

Feeling chastised, Geordi sets his fork on the table. He had not intended to offend the captain, but Picard seems off-put.

Smiling, Jean-Luc gazes at the table. "Every night I'd wonder what the family was doing, guess what was happening on that particular evening. Was J.P progressing in mok'bara class? Was he pestering Wesley to play chess again? How was Isabel's French coming along? Was she in dance class tonight? She'll make a beautiful dancer, just like her mother. Would the children still ride horses and go rock climbing if I wasn't around?"

Silent, every face around the table is plagued with sympathetic recognition.

"Every night as I closed my eyes," Jean-Luc exhales deeply. "I'd wonder if Beverly could still feel my presence."

A tiny tear escaping her eye, Beverly squeezes Jean-Luc's hand on the table.

"And I'd fall asleep, knowing that it were impossible, knowing I was completely alone." It was the first time Jean-Luc had relayed the extent of the emotions he had experienced to anyone other than Beverly, and he was surprised he was willing to be so vulnerable in a public setting. He had not been so forthcoming even in private conversation with Deanna, but tonight he is not wearing the captain's hat, and he can no longer maintain the facade that his adventure had been exhilarating and heroic.

The entire room is quiet, surprised by the captain's unorthodox display of public emotion and uncertain how to respond.

Beverly turns in her seat, placing her napkin on the table. "It's getting late. I'll take the kids home and get them ready for bed."

Isabel shakes her head, burying into Jean-Luc's chest. "Not without Daddy."

Standing out of her chair, Beverly does not have the energy to argue with her daughter. "Now, Isabel."

"If you want I can take the kids back and you two can stay," Wesley offers from his spot beside Jean-Paul who is seated next to his father.

Wiping J.P's face with his napkin, Beverly smiles weakly. "Thank you, honey. I think it's time to call it a day."

Jean-Luc shuffles Isabel out of his arms and rises from his seat. "I'm sorry to cut the evening short. It's been a long day. I hope you enjoy the rest of your evening."

Sharing a knowing look with Deanna, Beverly takes J.P's hand and starts for the door, Isabel behind her clutching Jean-Luc's hand firmly.

"They've commandeered our bedroom," remarks Jean-Luc, falling onto the sofa in the living area, tired and aching.

Half-smiling, Beverly curls up next to him, tucking her feet beneath her. "I let them sleep with me. It was lonely. I liked having them there."

Palming his face, Jean-Luc exhales audibly. "Well, that's understandable. But, what do we do now?"

"They don't want to let you out of their sight," Beverly laughs, sliding closer.

Jean-Luc furrows his brows. "I'm concerned."

Rubbing Jean-Luc's shoulder, Beverly nods. "Give it some time, dear. This is an adjustment for all of us. They won't be like this for long."

Resigned, Jean-Luc closes his eyes.

"What is it?" Beverly whispers, running her hand along his arm.

"It's stupid," Picard averts his eyes to the ground. "I shouldn't have told everyone how I would imagine what was happening on the Enterprise. It was inappropriate."

"Not at all," Beverly tells him assuringly. "They were asking about your…experience. You were telling them how you felt."

Half-smirking, Picard shakes his head. "That was too intimate to share with the crew."

"They're not just your crew. They're your friends," Beverly points out gently. "They understand. They care about you. When you…They were incredible. They were there for me and the kids. I couldn't have gotten through the last few months without them."

Reflecting on her words, Jean-Luc bobs his head. He owes them immeasurably for taking care of his family in his absence, not to mention the ship. "I guess…I guess I didn't want everyone thinking I had performed some heroic, miraculous feat."

"The attention is a little overwhelming?" Beverly summarizes.

"It was ingenuity and a damn lot of luck," Jean-Luc frowns. "And it was hard. Maybe they think it was a grand adventure and I was brave and resourceful, but all I wanted was to get home. I pushed the boundaries so I could fence with Jean-Paul, so I could finish that novel I was reading with Belle, so that I could make-up for our botched anniversary celebration before I left."

At Beverly's relaxed smile, Jean-Luc lays a hand across her neck and jaw. "I couldn't bear the thought of never holding you again."

Grinning into his lips, Beverly rubs his shoulder. "You never have to. The important thing now is that it's all over. You're home. We're together."

"Always. I love you," Jean-Luc whispers, drawing her into a kiss.

"I love you. Always," Beverly responds breathlessly, closing her eyes and kissing her husband in return. After months of pain, she finally feels as if she is healing.