A/N: I would like to thank Fallen Witch Angel, SpringOfMay, leox1214, and xLadyInBluex for your reviews. Some of you have reviewed since the beginning and I'm really grateful. And thanks for your kind words on the last chapter. It gave me a lot more confidence!
I hope you enjoy this one. It took forever. The good news is that I know where I'm going with the story now.
Disclaimer: I don't own TVD. Or the chapter title for that matter. That belongs to Explosions in the Sky.
Look Into The Air
Bonnie opted to spend the rest of the day with Jeremy. Everyone had decided that they would wait until Elena and Damon had come back before trying to find Stefan. Personally, Bonnie felt things might get worse by their presence since Stefan hadn't contacted either of them in months. He obviously didn't want to see them. Or maybe not. Maybe he was hurt and that way why he couldn't talk to them. Bonnie really hoped it was the former. Better being angry than in danger.
When Caroline and Tyler left, Bonnie went to the fridge to fetch a glass of orange juice.
They're out of juice...and pretty much everything else. The refrigerator would have been empty were it not for the leftover lasagna, presumably from Caroline, and a couple containers of condiments. Since Jeremy was the only one who technically needed food now, the responsibility was his to keep the kitchen stocked. He had obviously been neglectful.
When she went to see him in the living room, he was playing a video game.
Some things never change.
It hadn't even been ten minutes since they had left and he was already at it. Bonnie put her hands on her hips.
"Have you looked in your fridge lately?"
Jeremy's voice sounded distant. "No, why?" His eyes were glued to the television screen.
"Because it's not being used," Bonnie said dryly.
At that, Jeremy paused the game and turned to look at her. His expression was sheepish. "Yeah, uh, I've been meaning to get around to that."
"Well, now's a good time as any," she responded briskly.
"You wanna go grocery shopping?" he looked surprised.
"Jer, I've been cooped up in this house for almost two days, I need to do something." Her face was pleading.
"Yeah alright, just let me finish this."
With that, he was entranced in his game once again.
When they were on the road, Bonnie looked at the side streets and shops closely.
Jeremy was watching her expression.
"It's still the same you know." At her puzzled look he said, "Mystic Falls, I mean."
He added, "I thought the same thing too. That everything might've changed. For some reason, the Other Side feels like an eternity, but it's really not."
"How long did it take you to feel normal?" she asked softly.
"A couple of weeks I guess." He stopped in thought. "I kept thinking I was dreaming but then I would remember- ghosts don't sleep. So I knew it had to be real." He said quietly, "All because of you."
"Well I had to try-" she said awkwardly.
"No, you didn't. I was ready to accept my fate, Bonnie. I finally got my goodbyes- that's all I wanted." He added bitterly, "But your stubbornness won out once again."
Whoa, this was turning serious.
"Jer-" she started.
"Bonnie listen! I will always be so grateful for everything, you've saved me more times than I can count, and I haven't deserved it. When I came back, and you were gone, I couldn't believe it." His voice turned sharp. "You have no idea how guilty I felt, I was less than nothing."
Bonnie looked at him, perplexed.
"You don't need to feel guilty, Jer-"
"Yes I do!" His reaction startled her. He took a deep breath. "Yes, I do Bonnie. I'm trying to make a point, okay? I don't want you to do anything like that ever again. In the beginning, it was great, you saving the day and all but I could see it started to take its toll on you. The risk became greater, and then it was only a matter of time before it finally got you. And it did, just like I thought it would. The fact that both of us came back is a miracle. I don't want us to tempt fate again, alright?" he was breathing harshly.
"What, exactly, are you asking Jeremy?"
"I'm asking you to be more careful with your magic Bonnie. You're not invincible; you should know that better than anyone now." He exhaled. "All I want is for you to be responsible and know your limits. Losing you-" he broke off for a second, "it's not gonna happen again."
Her gaze seemed to size him up. She looked to be digesting his words. She finally answered.
"Okay." She smiled. "But can you do something for me?"
"What?"
"Can you stop gripping the steering wheel so hard? If you hold on any tighter, it's gonna break."
His face broke out in a smile.
"Do we really need eggs?" Jeremy griped.
Bonnie stared at him. "I don't think you understand how serious the state of your kitchen is. That lasagna looked a week old-"
"Hey! It was five days!-"
She continued, "Not to mention the lack of anything edible, with the exception of a half-eaten bag of chips I found in the pantry. So yeah, we need eggs."
They were standing in front of the cooler. Jeremy was pushing the cart while Bonnie grabbed an egg carton. She quickly checked the eggs before placing them in the cart.
"Do you eat yogurt?" she asked.
Jeremy shuddered, "No that shit is gross."
"Okay, moving on then." She stared a few feet ahead. "Well we definitely need milk. What percentage?"
"One," he answered.
"What about cheese?"
"As long as it's not those kraft sliced things I'm down for anything."
"Oh yeah, those are so gross! It's like eating plastic."
She went over and grabbed a small log of cheddar cheese. "How about this then?"
He nodded absentmindedly. "Yeah that's fine."
"Do you guys have butter or margarine?"
He didn't answer.
"Hey." She had a box of butter in one hand and a container of margarine in the other. "Which one?"
"Oh, uh margarine I guess."
She dropped the margarine in the cart and looked at him closely. "What's wrong?"
"Nothing."
"Come on, Jer, what is it?"
"Nothing's wrong. I was just thinking is all."
"About what?"
"I guess I'm just happy you know? For the first time, things are actually okay. I know Silas is still around, which is now always in the back of my mind, but right here right now, things are normal. It's just nice that we still have this," he said gesturing around him.
"What, a grocery store?" she asked sardonically.
"No, peace. It's not chaotic."
They looked at each other. One word was popping in both their minds. Yet.
Jeremy was right. He was definitely more insightful than he led others to believe. This might be one of the only normal moments of her life before everything went to shit. Especially because she knew that dealing with Silas was inevitable. She knew it was her responsibility; she had brought him up after all.
Bonnie tried breaking the grave atmosphere. "Come on, let's go to the produce section. I have a need for some pineapple."
When they went up to the till, Bonnie's first inclination was to reach for her debit card. But of course, she didn't have it. It was at her house, where her dad was. She sighed.
Jeremy looked at her oddly. And then realization hit his face. "You're not paying for my groceries Bonnie." He pulled out his wallet. "But you'll need money eventually. Why are you avoiding your dad?"
The cashier was almost at the end of the order.
"I'm not avoiding, per sé." The cashier rattled off the total. Jeremy then swiped his card. "I'm just delaying the inevitable."
"What? You think he won't let you leave the house?"
"More like leave my room. He doesn't exactly have the greatest memories of me these last few months."
They packed up their groceries and put them in the cart.
"I think you're worrying too much. Just go see him! It'll be a shock, but things'll get normal before you know it."
"I don't know." Her voice sounded uneasy. "Maybe I'll just wait a few more days..."
"Nope. No more delays. I'm dropping you off on the way home." He had a slight smirk on his face.
She looked affronted. "Don't I get a say in this?"
"Nope. Don't you remember? Your mind is all garbled since coming back from the dead. So your judgment can't be trusted." Now he had a full blown grin.
She smacked his arm and seemed to concede. "Jerk."
"It'll be fine. Don't worry!"
She let out a small laugh. "I hope you're right. If you don't see me right away you'll know why."
"Hey, Jer?"
"Hm?" he had just pulled into her driveway.
"Did you notice anything different when you came back?"
"What, you mean like the town or something?"
"No, I mean, did you feel different? Look at the world differently?"
He thought about it. "If you mean my outlook on life changed, then yes. But I still feel the same. Living day-to-day is just like it used to be. Although it kinda sucks not having the super-strength of a hunter anymore." His eyes met hers. "Is that what you meant?"
She let out a breath. "Not exactly. I feel different, physically. It's like I'm more aware of what's going on around me. I swear, my senses are on overdrive sometimes."
His expression changed. "Does it have to do with that witch? Or just the crystal?"
"I think Kazima caused this, but I'm not a hundred percent sure. It certainly feels related to my magic but I don't want to rush to conclusions."
His eyes bore into hers. "Bonnie, this could be really serious. Is it causing you pain?"
"No. It's probably not a big deal. I suppose in a way, it's a good thing. I'll probably sense a vampire a mile away, you know?" she let out a small laugh. "I shouldn't have brought it up. It's not a b-"
"I'm glad you did. If it gets worse, you'll let me know right?"
She eyed him for a moment before nodding. "Yeah, I will."
Bonnie exited the car and slammed the door.
She turned and glared down at Jeremy mockingly. "I'm blaming you for anything that happens to me from here on out."
He only laughed. "See you later, Bonnie."
When he drove off, Bonnie took a deep breath and walked up the pathway to the front door. She tried to open it but it was locked. On impulse, she opened it magically. Was she still relying on the spirits? It had been so long that Bonnie almost couldn't tell the difference. She recognized, however, that no physical exertion was applied, so it couldn't be spirit magic. It must be expression then. It just felt different somehow. As if she had more control over it. When Bonnie had first started developing her expression abilities, she hadn't noticed the lack of control she had; expression tended to manifest itself and the user until it was too late. At the moment, Bonnie felt the opposite, as if she had control over anything and everything at will. It was a heady experience.
When the door opened, Bonnie stepped inside. The silence was deafening. She could hear every creak in the floorboards, every window rattle from the wind. The house was stuffy. When she took a few steps she could hear the faint sound of a television in the living room down the hallway.
She slowly crept into the room. It was a mess. At least compared to the last time she had seen it. And it smelled even worse. There were dishes on the side table, which she suspected-had been there for at least a week. She spotted broken glass in front of one of the sofas and a few pieces of clothing around the room. The recliner was facing the television, which meant she could partially see its user- her dad. When she went to stand beside him, she gaped.
He was asleep. And speaking objectively, he looked like shit. His face looked slightly swollen and unshaven. He had dark bags under his eyes. He was wearing some ratty old t-shirt with a few stains on it. Was this really her dad? Where was the spiffy, kempt man permanently in a suit?
Some combination of guilt and sympathy coursed through her. Was this because of her? Duh. Bonnie mentally slapped herself. Of course it was. Sometimes it was difficult registering how much her father cared because he never really showed his feelings. Yes, he got protective from time to time, but speaking from experience, he acted more like a guardian than an actual father. Adding to that was his excessive work load, which often placed him out of town so Bonnie had seen him rarely as it was. The longest time period she had ever seen him was only recently when he had taken the mayor position. Her father hadn't had a clue about her life when he had strolled back into Mystic Falls. She had resented him for thinking he could suddenly play the father role and that everything would be okay. The fact that he had judged magic so harshly hadn't helped. And tried to interfere on every aspect of her life. She guessed however that, in the end, all of that hadn't mattered- because here he was.
She looked at him a little longer before deciding on a course of action. She concluded that she would clean up first before he woke up. And try not to scare the living shit out of him.
When Bonnie gathered all the dishes, she caught a glance of the half empty bottle of scotch an arm's reach away from her father. She promptly picked it up and went into the kitchen. It was even worse in there. She fervently hoped her father hadn't spent the last few weeks like this. But it became more obvious that he had when she saw the state of the rest of the house. Bonnie groaned inwardly, this was gonna take a while.
Surprisingly, her father never woke when she was cleaning. Even after all the racket she made, he never once moved an inch. The first thing she did was open the windows to let some air in. When she was finally done with the living room and the kitchen, she decided she would make him some food. Since his refrigerator was as sparse as Jeremy's, the only choice she had was eggs and toast.
While she was frying up the eggs, she decided that enough was enough. If he wasn't going to wake, she was going to do it herself. She lightly tapped her father on the shoulder. Nothing. She nudged him. Not even a wink. She grabbed him by the shoulders and shook him. "Dad, wake up!"
Bonnie might have thought he was dead were it not for the light snoring.
Bonnie went right up to her father's ears and bellowed loudly, "Oi! Pop! Wake up!"
Her father's look was priceless. His eyes burst open from the sudden noise and took in his surroundings. It was only then that he realized who was standing right in front of him. And he backed further into the couch.
"What the f-" he rasped out.
She cut him off and tsked. "We're not supposed to swear. I put a lot of money in that swear jar, you know."
His eyes were practically jutting out of his head. And then they started watering. Oh no, don't do that.
His voice was hoarse. "Am I dreaming? Or h-hallucinating? Because I swear this is my daughter standing in front of me." He started blubbering, which was definitely not Rudy-like. "Bonnie?"
She kneeled in front of him. Her eyes were starting to tear up as well. "Hey dad." She cracked a watery smile.
"Can you stay? Just a little longer?" His eyes shut and then opened again. "It must be a dream. I never thought I was crazy but maybe I am."
Bonnie laughed. "You're not crazy dad. This isn't a dream or hallucination."
"Then you're a ghost." He started wiping his face. His eyes widened when he realized the reality of that statement.
"No, I'm not." She grabbed his hand. "I'm real, I came back dad. Like from the great blue yonder, you know?"
His gaze drew down to their joined hands. His expression was dumbfounded.
"It's okay, dad. I know it seems crazy, but in a world full of witches and vampires, what's wrong with a little resurrection?"
His hand rose and cradled her face. "So you're still the same?" his voice cracked.
Tears were rolling down her face. "Yeah, I'm still the same."
They stared at each other a little while longer before Bonnie smelled the smoke. "Oh shit! I forgot about the eggs." She burst into the kitchen.
Rudy cleared his throat. In his best authoritative voice, he said, "It's still 25 cents a swear Bonnie."
When Bonnie realized there was no saving the eggs, she told her dad to go shower and shave while she made another batch. She would have just ordered pizza but after finding several half-eaten pizza boxes, she decided her dad needed something mildly nutritious.
When Bonnie kept picturing her father's face after he had woken, she made a conscious decision to take better care of herself. Not only because her life was at stake, but her father's wellbeing as well. She couldn't seem to forget the vacant emptiness she had seen in his eyes. She knew that eventually, he would have gotten over her death, or at the very least, accepted it on some level, but she could not handle seeing him like that ever again. He had been broken, a shadow of who he had been before. The confident, reserved man had been gone and been replaced by a lost soul. Grief was a natural thing, but turning to alcohol and becoming a sedentary vegetable was not the way to go about it. If this was his method of coping, he seriously needed to consider another options. Like a therapy group or something.
She was just buttering the toast when Rudy walked through the doorway.
Now that's better.
Although his face still bore the faint signs of exhaustion, his appearance had greatly improved. He was clean shaven, didn't smell bad, and was wearing clean clothing.
He walked over and held onto her tightly. She wrapped her arms around his waist.
"Whoever brought you back, I'll be in debt to them for the rest of my life," he murmured softly.
I don't know about that, Bonnie thought inwardly. Kazima seemed pretty shady.
"It doesn't matter now, dad. Just know that I love you."
"I love you too sweetheart."
For a moment, Bonnie thought he was never going to let her go, until finally, his arms loosened enough and he placed his hands on her shoulders.
"I still can't believe this is happening. That you're real." His voice was full of wonder.
Bonnie felt slightly awkward. It was just little old her. He was being so intense, it was weird. Sometimes she didn't realize how long she'd been gone. Although when you thought about it, two months wasn't really that long. Maybe when you missed someone, it felt like an eternity.
"How did this happen?" he asked quietly.
"Why don't you sit down and I'll explain it all."
While Rudy filled himself with eggs and toast, Bonnie rehashed the details on her return. She was beginning to get comfortable telling the story now. Although she omitted even more details this time around. She didn't want her dad freaking out about all the risks and the emotional upheaval she had experienced, so she basically summed it up as a chance meeting with Kol and Kazima and phrased it so that Kazima practically resurrected Bonnie and Kol herself.
Her father immediately started asking questions about Kol. Bonnie answered as vaguely as she could without sounding suspicious. The less her dad knew the better. She was definitely not portraying him in the most accurate light. She painted him as a kind-hearted vampire who wanted to seek atonement and live his life positively. If her father knew the truth, he would be beyond pissed.
She also didn't delve too much into the Silas bit. She did not want him worrying about that. He had been overprotective enough when it came to her magic, let alone her trying to take out a two thousand year old vampire with vengeance on his mind.
When Rudy was finished eating, Bonnie asked, "Do you want to go for a walk? I need some fresh air. And so do you."
He smiled self-consciously. "I guess I do, huh?"
Bonnie grinned. "I'd say so."
They stood up and Bonnie grabbed his plate and placed it in the sink. It was a hot day outside so they only put their shoes on.
The sunlight made welcoming contact with her skin.
They were walking in silence for a while before Bonnie finally spoke.
"Dad?"
"Yes?"
"When did mom leave?"
He didn't answer right away. "Right after we found out the truth." He let out a shaky breath. "It was like a blow to the head. I wanted to kill that Gilbert boy when I found out he'd been lying to us about your whereabouts." He sighed. "You have to know how difficult it was for your mother. She knew abandoning you as a child was bad enough, but not being able to prevent your death was unforgivable in her eyes. The guilt was killing her Bonnie, so she left to escape it all."
"Do you know where she went?"
"Not a clue. I'm hoping she'll contact me, but it will probably be a while knowing your mother."
He was right. Her mom was known for a lot of things, but facing reality was not one of them.
They were quiet after that. It was a comfortable silence though. Bonnie became acutely aware of the breeze against her skin and the birds chirping in the background. She felt balanced, at home, when she was like this.
When they made it back to the house, Bonnie took a close look at her dad. He looked more at ease. Like weights had been lifted off his shoulders.
Looking at him now made her realize how much she had taken for granted. Even though he had never really been there for her, she knew the kind of blow her death had dealt him. He kept watching her intently, as if he didn't want to let her out of his sight. Bonnie decided to concede to his unstated request. She spent the next few hours with her dad, just talking mostly. They both did a bit of cleaning on the rest of the house. They ended up watching a movie and her dad fell asleep not long after.
It was getting kind of late. Bonnie had planned on making supper but she didn't want to wake her dad. She put a blanket on him and went into her room. Everything was still the same. She liked to think of her room as a mix between bohemian and girly-girl. The blankets on her bed were an intricate print reminiscent of gypsies but she had a poster of Ryan Gosling on her wall. Her very ancient desk was a dark mahogany covered with candles and Bennett historical objects but she had a whole stack of stuffed animals on her dresser. It sort of demonstrated the two sides of Bonnie Bennett. On one hand, she was like any other teenage girl. She had good friends, she strived to do well in school, and she had gone to plenty of drunken parties. On the other hand, she was an inquisitive witch who wanted to surpass her limits. She was lacking in confidence in her abilities but would still do what it took to save her friends.
In some ways, the room felt alien to her. She couldn't positively say that that was her anymore. She really had no idea who she was. It was too late for her to be some naive teenager. That was long past. But she also wasn't the hardened witch who had lost her grandmother. She no longer viewed things in terms of her against the world. In black and white. At one point, Bonnie had felt like every vampire was her enemy. That was not the case now. She didn't really have a vendetta against anyone anymore. She wasn't about to be best friends with Damon or anything, but she didn't hate him. As a likable person though, he left much to be desired, and that was something she still dealt with. She was still going to be weary around vampires, but the harsh judgment she had reserved for them was much lower.
With that, Bonnie made a decision.
She would definitely have to change her room. The Ryan Gosling poster was staying though.
Bonnie had planned on going back to Jeremy's after visiting her dad but she ended up staying the night. She was dead tired and wanted to sleep in her own bed. It was odd how comforting that one simple thing could be. She would have sent him a text message but her phone was long gone along with her old body. That was an even more creepy thought- that her other body was bones and dust now. Bonnie ignored that morbid thought and made a mental note to get another phone tomorrow.
Bonnie's last thought before she fell asleep was her hope that Jeremy didn't take her words seriously about not showing up.
When Bonnie got out of bed the next morning, she could smell bacon and eggs. She was practically salivating. When she strode into the kitchen like a zombie with her hair in disarray, her father took one look at her and turned back to cooking.
She took a long glance at her dad. He was dressed pretty spiffy.
"Where are you off to today?" She was smiling. Her dad finally looked like his old self.
"I have a meeting with Sheriff Forbes."
"Really?" He started serving the food on plates. Bonnie grabbed two mugs and filled them with fresh coffee.
"I have to convince her that I'm still suitable as Mayor." He placed the food on the table and they both sat down.
"Oh." Bonnie paused in thought. She guessed he had been AWOL for a while. "I'm guessing she didn't know-"
"No, she doesn't, or didn't anyways."
"You could always tell her, you know."
"I'd rather not, Bonnie." He gave a small smile. "It's better if we leave that behind us."
"Won't argue with you there." With that, Bonnie dug in. After a few bites, she said, "You won't lose your job, will you?"
"I've been gone almost ten days, which is big deal for a public figure, but I'm sure once I sort things out it will be fine."
Bonnie hoped so. It wouldn't be fair if he lost his job because of grief. Especially because no one knew about it. In one of the worst moments of his life, he hadn't had anyone to talk to; no one to lean on.
Bonnie supposed he had his other job speaking at conferences and seminars but that would mean he would be away once again. For once, Bonnie wanted him to stick around. They were finally getting closer after so many years. All it took for that to happen was her death, she thought sardonically.
After her father left, Bonnie tried to find her car keys. She had seen her prius parked outside. Luckily her dad hadn't gotten around to selling it just yet. She finally found them in one of the kitchen drawers. She quickly changed and went outside.
It felt a bit odd driving after so long but she quickly got the hang of it.
The first thing Bonnie did was get a new phone. She went to her provider in the only strip mall and got the smart phone with the best deal. If it was anything like her old phone then she was happy. That and great coverage. Considering her somewhat reckless and dangerous lifestyle she needed a reliable phone.
Bonnie was outside in the parking lot when she spotted a very familiar looking vehicle across the street. It also happened to be parked in front of one of the seediest bars in the Mystic Falls area.
Seriously? Bonnie debated on whether or not she should satisfy her curiosity. Screw it. Bonnie figured she'd be in and out in five minutes tops. She didn't bother driving because it was so close.
When Bonnie walked in the oh-so charming pub, the smell overwhelmed her. It was a lovely combination of smoke, beer, and she suspected, urine. Her eyes scanned the place for the figure she was expecting to find. She didn't see him right away. She had to walk further inside before she saw him sitting in a corner.
"Don't you think this place is a bit low, even for you?" she asked.
He scoffed. "Can't a bloke have a pint in peace?"
"Not today. Besides, I'll only be a minute."
"I'm not drowning in my sorrows, if that's what you're inferring."
She laughed. "Believe me, that wasn't my first thought."
"Then what do you want?" he murmured gruffly.
"I thought I'd let you know that we're probably going to look for Stefan today."
"What? You thought I'd want to tag along? I think I'll pass." He took a swig of his beer.
She put her hands on her hips. "Don't you want to know what happened to him?" Why am I even bothering? She was mostly just trying to help him out but a part of her also wanted him to feel welcome. He wasn't exactly showing gratitude for her kind gestures.
"Darling, I think the Salvatores have enough people kissing their asses. I'm not about to join them."
"You know it's not like that." She was now frowning. "I think you know that Stefan's disappearance is related to Silas. Whatever he has to say is going to be important."
"Well if that's the case then you can just tell me, can't you?"
"So you can just sit on your ass in this lovely place?" She let out a short laugh. "I'm not gonna help you if you're planning on being lazy and drunk."
"I'll have you know that I just got here." His expression was priceless. He couldn't look more offended. "I happen to have the greatest tolerance for alcohol. Being my age has its advantages in case you weren't aware."
She grinned. "I'm sure it does. But there are also, uh, disadvantages, to being old."
His eyes narrowed into slits. "What's that supposed to mean?"
She smirked. Don't say it. Don't say it. "Oh you know, you get soft in certain areas. I've heard it can be quite emasculating-"
He growled and stood up. "That's it." He had some sort of evil grin on his face. She hadn't meant for him to react this way, she had been joking.
He walked right up to her and pushed her against the wall. He said easily, "I can assure you, Bonnie, that I am more than able to perform the duties of any young man." Although his face had been mocking, it was now starting to turn serious.
He seemed to be aware of their precarious position. His tall form enclosed her own. The scent of him surrounded her, a combination of pinewood and warm spice assailed her nostrils. She vaguely thought that odd, considering she found him indoors in a smelly bar.
The swift change in Kol was startling. She knew she had been treading on dangerous ground when she made that comment. Had she purposefully tried to challenge him? His face was pressed in serious lines. She hadn't answered him, just stared closely at his eyes. They were glazed, as if he were in a trance. Eventually, the telltale veins around his eyes crept up. Okay, time to end this.
"Kol? Kol?". Suddenly, his face slackened its tension and he looked around. He seemed to be registering his surroundings. He looked shocked at his own actions and immediately released her.
His voice was hoarse. "You better leave. I'm not up for any more banter."
The sound of Bonnie's footsteps was the only sign she had moved.
Bonnie took a deep breath when she left the bar. What was that? She had never regretted a decision more. The situation had gone from joking exchanges to intense manhandling in a matter of seconds. Was this what dealing with Kol entailed? Granted, she hadn't expected to elicit such a reaction out of Kol, but she was being deliberately naive by thinking he wouldn't react even a little bit violently when he was known for it. It was just odd because she knew he hadn't intended on reacting so intensely. She could tell that he had just meant to intimidate her but that had changed swiftly. His hands on her shoulders had been crushing; his cold breath on her face had dazed her. He was known for his impulsive nature, so combining that with vampirism made for a pretty unpredictable and volatile character.
Bonnie crossed the street in a stupor. I am such an idiot. Next time she saw his car, she was just going to look the other way and mind her own damned business.
Bonnie was still reprimanding herself when she sped off.
Bonnie had managed to calm down by the time she reached Jeremy's house.
Kol was all but forgotten when Bonnie spotted Damon's camaro in the driveway. Oh shit. She was really not prepared for a reunion right now. She had already been through, what, like three or four if one counted every time she had started crying. Not that Damon would get emotional. But Damon being there meant Elena was as well. Bonnie grit her teeth and thought, just get it over with.
Bonnie didn't try to analyze why she didn't want to see them.
She walked up the front porch and took a deep breath. She was about to knock when the door was jerked open. A figure with long, dark hair attached itself to her person instantly.
When Bonnie spoke, it was muffled. "Elena. Elena, I c-can't breathe."
Elena immediately released her, but not before giving her one last crushing embrace. When Bonnie looked at her face, it was covered in tears. Oh no, don't do that.
She was hiccupping when she finally spoke. "I can't believe you're b-back. After everything that happened-" she broke off and started taking a few harsh breaths. "We thought we'd lost you, and yet, here you are." More tears continued to fall.
When Bonnie felt her own tears roll down her cheeks, she thought, that's it, this is the last time.
Elena dragged her inside with unhuman force.
A familiar voice droned, "Well if it isn't my favourite Bennett."
Bonnie looked up and found herself staring into a pair of familiar piercing blue eyes. Elena shoved her from behind into Damon. He wrapped his arms around her. The familiar scent of leather filled her senses.
Wow this is strange.
Bonnie awkwardly returned the hug. He muttered quickly, "Took you long enough. Any longer, and I wouldn't have known what to do about her."
She stared angrily up at him. For some reason, his nonchalant comment bothered her. As if only Elena's wellbeing was important, when it was she who had died. She had been living in hell, so to speak, for almost two months and he still only managed to think about Elena. She was about to respond with a sharp comment until she looked at him closely, and saw that most of it was an act. He was trying to hide it, but she caught the concerned, intent gleam in his eyes before it disappeared. Seeing Damon out of sorts was a novel experience. And one she could certainly appreciate.
Damon lowered his arms from around her a moment later. He was either way overconfident in her abilities or he was trying to make light of a serious situation. Bonnie knew it to be the latter.
Bonnie looked back at Elena. Although the tears had stopped, she was still quietly sobbing.
"I still can't believe this-" she started again.
Damon interrupted, "You have so little confidence in our witch's abilities? I knew all along-"
Bonnie smacked him and rolled her eyes. "Save it, Damon."
Damon was about to retort when Jeremy walked in.
"So I guess you survived your dad?"
Bonnie smiled. "Yeah, it was nice actually." She put on a perplexed face. "We're usually at odds about everything but we didn't fight once."
He sighed loudly. "That's what happens when you die. Take for instance Elena, she finally stopped nagging me about the-"
"Hey!" Elena knocked him on the head. Jeremy was laughing. "I do not nag. Excuse me if you don't know how to load a dishwasher."
"Hey you're the vampire. You're gonna do it twice as fast as me anyways."
Elena sniffled and stuck her tongue out at him.
She then turned to Bonnie. Her face looked serious. "Jer told me what happened. About you trying to keep it all a secret."
Bonnie glared at Jeremy. "He did, did he?" He looked mildly ashamed and wouldn't meet her eyes.
Elena went into maternal mode. "Yeah, he did. I can't believe you would do that. Don't get me wrong, I'll never be more grateful for Jer being back but not if it means you have to sacrifice yourself in the process."
Bonnie turned back to Jeremy. Now he looked smug. They had probably rehearsed this.
"Look, I'm sorry Elena but I couldn't just ruin everything. Everyone was so happy, I didn't want to drop this bomb on everyone."
"You knew we had a right to know. You can't exactly keep something like that a secret forever."
Bonnie sighed. "Yeah, I guess I just wanted to delay the inevitable."
Elena seemed to digest that and said, "He also told us about how you came back. About the crystal and the old witch."
Damon added. "Yeah, it seems you've made quite a few friends on the Other Side. Including a certain Original who tried to kill me-" he glared, "-in case you've forgotten."
Bonnie rolled her eyes. "You obviously use the word friend lightly, because all we did was help each other out. In case you didn't notice, I'm alive partly because of him."
"Yeah, and so is he," he replied scornfully.
"Oh I'm sorry. Should I have consulted your feelings on this? Poor little Damon and his ego. Just because Kol kicked your ass more than a few times-"
"Enough!" Elena cut in. She turned to Damon. "I'm not exactly thrilled at Kol's return either but if it means Bonnie's alive then I'll take it."
Bonnie murmured, "He promised that he wouldn't hurt you guys." She made a pointed look at Damon. "Although he didn't mention you," She added bitingly.
"Did he really say that?" Elena asked.
Bonnie looked meaningfully at Jeremy. "Yeah, Jer obviously left that part out."
Jeremy had that shameful look on his face. He replied defensively, "Well it's not as if we can trust his word. He definitely changed his mind that one time, when he tried to chop my arms off."
"Yeah, and has he hurt you once since then?" Bonnie asked sharply.
Jeremy grudgingly replied, "Well, no but-"
"And there you have it. The Other Side has changed him, I promise. And if he ever made a move to hurt any of you, I'll just pop some blood vessels, okay?"
She all looked purposely at them and continued, "I'm sick of all this Kol talk. This isn't why I came over. I'm sure Jeremy's told you about Silas."
Elena nodded. "He said that there's no way he's desiccating right now because that spell stopped working when you died."
"So, Stefan hasn't tried contacting you once?"
Damon gave a slight nod. "I've tried calling him but it goes straight to voicemail not to mention his mailbox is always full so I know he hasn't even listened to his messages."
Bonnie gave them a serious look. "I want you guys to be prepared if something did happen to Stefan, okay? If I can't trace him, we have to be ready for the worst."
The truth of her words set in. Damon was trying to maintain a stoic facade but ended up failing. It was hard to miss the terrified expression that passed his face before he controlled himself. Elena looked shocked and near tears when Bonnie said this. Jeremy looked concerned and upset, but not nearly as much as Elena.
"I don't know what we would do without you Bonnie. We'd never find Stefan if..." she trailed off.
You hadn't come back. For some reason, that comment rubbed Bonnie the wrong way. Elena was trying to show gratitude, but Bonnie felt slightly offended that Elena was only showing appreciation for her as a witch. Bonnie knew that Elena loved her, but she couldn't help but feel that she didn't appreciate her as a real person, as someone with feelings. Although she just got here, Elena still hadn't asked Bonnie about how she felt about coming back. She only hoped that she could confide to Elena in private, but it was doubtful. Weren't friends supposed to do that? Maybe Bonnie was just being too sensitive. She sometimes felt that her friendship with Elena was weakening as time went on and that they were just growing apart. Bonnie only hoped that once they didn't have Silas to deal with, that things would go back to normal. Bonnie acknowledged that these feelings stemmed from Elena's period when her humanity was gone. Prom had been a disaster on a grand scale. She had thought their friendship would never recover but somehow it had reassembled, but just barely. It would be a long time before they were as close as they were before.
Pushing aside any more resentful thoughts, Bonnie offered a consoling expression. "It's okay Elena. The point is that I am here. We'll find him."
"Don't you need something of his to track him?" Damon asked.
Bonnie shook her head. After Kol's comment about her new magic, she decided to give it a shot. It might even be more accurate than her usual locator spell. She closed her eyes and concentrated. She focused on Stefan's essence, his aura, so to speak. A jolt startled her. Images started flashing in her mind. Water. Trapped.
Bonnie heard herself gasping.
"Bonnie, what's wrong?"
He was drowning? She could practically feel the water entering her lungs.
"Bonnie?!"
Bonnie became aware that she was moving. Although her eyes were closed, she could still see. An intuitive force was guiding her to the front door. She could vaguely hear the footsteps following behind her.
He was in pain. It was unbearable.
She walked slowly down the front steps and stopped when she was bathed in sunlight. That was it. Her magic then took on a life of its own, naturally drawing on the energy of the Sun. Bonnie was too busy being in awe of what was happening to try and understand it. It was paralyzing.
Everything suddenly became acute. She could feel the cool air wafting from the river. She saw the fish swimming past the safe. She heard the harsh sounds of the water lapping from the waterfall as if she were right next to it.
Bonnie's eyes burst open in shock.
"I know where he is."
Bonnie took a few deep breaths to calm herself down. She could feel her hands trembling.
They waited for her to elaborate but Bonnie was lost in the images that haunted her. The agony and distress he was going through was overwhelming. How had he endured this? The answer was simple. He had no choice. Vampires couldn't die without a weapon. Imagining the cycle of drowning and healing over and over made Bonnie want to cringe in anguish. For a moment, his pain had been hers and she hadn't been able to block it. The instant she was outside she had felt it on an unparallel level. She had been there, right alongside him.
The need to help overrode any other thoughts.
"We have to go help him," she said desperately.
Elena's eyes widened anxiously. "Where is he?" she asked quickly.
"By the Fish Creek river." Or in it, she thought dreadfully. She thought it best not to mention that and worry them further.
"Alive?" she asked quietly.
Bonnie just nodded.
Damon and Jeremy were looking at her strangely.
Jeremy started, "Bonnie, you were-"
Damon cut him off. "Then lead the way Judgey. We're getting him now."
Bonnie stared at him meaningfully. "You're going to need lots of blood bags."
Jeremy and Bonnie were waiting on the front porch for Elena to fetch her car keys. She thought it was best to take her SUV in case there was any rough terrain.
Jeremy said, "Bonnie, were you aware that you were, like, glowing earlier?"
Bonnie stared at him oddly. "You mean metaphorically? That's nice Jer but-"
He interrupted. "No, you were actually glowing, like emitting real light. It was amazing, but kinda freaky, you know?"He was silent a moment. "I've seen you do a lot of things but never anything like that," he murmured in a low voice.
Bonnie wasn't sure how to respond to that. She had never felt anything like that before either. Was she some kind of empathetic psychic now? The amount of details she had known was startling. She had thought that she would simply get an inkling to Stefan's location but now knew every single detail, down to the nearest tree. What was it about the Sun? It was as if her magic relied on it now to become stronger. Not only that, but it felt like the rays were piercing down into her soul. What the hell was going on? Bonnie thought she was going crazy.
They walked down the front steps when Elena came out the front door. She was clutching her keys.
Bonnie was about to follow them to the SUV when she spotted Kol's Challenger parked down the street. He was just getting out and heading towards her. As soon as Elena saw Kol she instinctively moved in a flash. She was immediately right beside Bonnie.
"Why is he here Bonnie?" Her voice was tinged with exasperation and unease.
She grabbed Elena's hand. "It's okay." Bonnie tried comforting Elena through touch. "He's okay. He's not gonna hurt you or Jeremy." Elena looked down at Bonnie and she knew she had succeeded. Awareness dawned on Elena's face. When she let go of Bonnie, she seemed surprised by her own reaction. Bonnie was as well. She thought it would take a lot more convincing than that.
Elena's face became neutral once again.
"He is not coming in my car."
She turned her back and went in the driver's seat.
Bonnie supposed it was good that they were avoiding each other. It probably wouldn't take long before one of them became irritable and a fight broke out.
Bonnie walked quickly up to Kol. "What are you doing here?"
He muttered, "I just wanted to say that I'm-"
Bonnie didn't have the patience for this and cut him off. "Come on you dolt. I know where Stefan is."
She grabbed his hand and dragged him to her prius.
Jeremy followed.
"He's coming with us?!" he asked incredulously.
Bonnie stared at Jeremy. "Yes, he's coming with us. Although it's doubtful-" she made a pointed look at Kol,"-we may end up needing his help."
Kol was smirking in amusement. "I call shotgun."
When Bonnie sat in the driver's seat she could have slapped herself. Had Kol been about to apologize? And she had been the idiot to interrupt him at the most colossal moment in history. Moron. She could have been milking it for all it was worth but she had interrupted him before those glorious words had exited his mouth. Bonnie sighed.
Oh well.
A/N: So I hope the story is coming along nicely for those reading. I needed to get things settled with Bonnie before the plot can really get going so this was necessary. And I'm not an Elena-hater if anyone gets that impression. I do however, acknowledge that she has been a pretty terrible friend the last couple of seasons. Even those that adore Elena cannot possibly be blind to that. I'm hoping season five improves on that but it's doubtful. I don't even know if I will continue to watch the show. It's looking pretty abysmal on Bonnie's end.