ADULTHOOD PART 3

.

.

"How did you find out?" I asked Hanji the following morning with excitement. My heart was thumping fast.

.

"He mailed me." Hanji said while chomping down her sandwich.

.

.

I found that rather simple than what I had expected. Hanji would sometimes go as far as taking drastic measures to gain what she wanted to gain, no matter what was the cost.

.

"Oh, he did?" I asked in monotone.

.

"I actually bugged him when I was bored," Hanji replied and then chuckled. "Geez, you and your sweetheart are so cute. You're really compatible to each other. Just get married once you see each other again okay?"

.

Such embarrassing things to say, Hanji. I wonder how she have always managed to that without even thinking what would others think once they heard what she was saying.

.

"He arrived since last weekend," Hanji followed while finishing her juice. "Though I spammed him asking where he was staying but I got no reply."

.

"He must be… busy," I theorized. "Hanji, you shouldn't bother him too much. You never know if he's doing something important or not. Spamming too much might annoy him too."

.

"You'll be a really caring wife to Levi, Petra! I guarantee it!" She exclaimed with a double thumbs-up which made me blush bright. I hushed her down while covering my red face, hiding. Hanji always jump from topic after topic every now and then… her habit.

.

Though I haven't really imagined myself as a lover to Levi, let alone as his wife. Just the thought was enough to make me feel rather… embarrassed and at the same time giddy. I was feeling thrilled too but wasn't really expecting much, as I wasn't sure for myself what exactly Levi thought of me was. All I can brag about was our exclusive shared little moments between the two of us but other than that, nothing much changed with our current relationship. Our conversations through mails weren't long and special too; we've only asked how were we fairing and after that, the conversation went silent.

.

"Though he did say," Hanji interrupted my train of thought. "That he is only back for vacation from overseas. He didn't say for how long he would be here though."

.

I felt worried. Sudden questions popped in my head. Will I be able to see him before he goes back abroad again? That was the top question floating in my mind.

.

"Don't worry, Petra. I'll definitely figure out where Levi is staying so you two could finally hook up!"

.

"HANJI!" I blushed. Very bright.

.

.

.

I spent the rest of my time thinking about this sudden news, even during class hours, and even when Hanji was telling me all their course activities that always made me lose my appetite.

.

What if I see Levi unexpectedly?

.

A question in my mind formed. If ever that would happen, I'd probably just distance myself. I could see myself in extreme timidity to the point that I would be just happy seeing him from afar and not even having a conversation with Levi. And here I was promised I would confess to him and won't be a cry baby.

.

What if he sees and approaches me?

.

I thought I would probably stay in silence and stare at my feet like how I used to-

.

.

"What am I doing thinking of negative things?" I whispered to myself. I pinched myself and said, "I shouldn't be like this anymore. I gave my word to Levi. I promised myself to properly confess my feelings without breaking my voice and crying. I should be more confident; I should act like an adult would act. Yes. I should. I can."

.

Through talking to myself I hoped I could gain more courage and confidence and prepare myself for whatever unexpected events might happen involving Levi.

.

.

.

And then after three days, my thoughts became reality.

.

I saw Levi in our university, talking with Erwin.

.

Just seeing his back and profile made me anxious; my heart raced and my cheeks went warm. It was really Levi. His clean hair cut, his dark eyes, fair complexion, and small built – nothing much changed with him physically. I wanted to approach and ask him how he was, what he did abroad, how was it felt like, and a bunch of other stuff but my feel just won't move and then-

.

"Oh!" Hanji wrapped an arm on my shoulders with her eyes fixed on Levi. "It's Levi! Look Petra! It's your sweetheart!" and then she grabbed my wrist and we both ran towards Levi and Erwin. I tried to stop her but she was too excited to even listen to what I had to say.

.

"Levi!" Hanji called out with his other hand waving in the air when the other was dragging me. As we were drawing closer to them my heart raced even more and slowly, I saw his familiar expression once again after these years.

.

"Tsk," I heard Levi clicked his tongue, again after these years. His habit hasn't changed.

.

"What's with the sour face, Levi?" Hanji sounded disappointed. "You should have at least smile at us and give us a big hug!" and then Hanji and her crazy self hugged each other… if you know what mean. Then suddenly he grabbed my shoulders and pulled me in front of Levi. I panicked inside. What was Hanji doing so suddenly?! I wasn't prepared for this moment!

.

"And here's Petraaa~!" Levi exclaimed who was patting my shoulders. "I bet you missed her lots~"

.

.

Hanji… what were you saying…

.

I froze instantly. But I wasn't looking at my feet, but to Levi. I was gripping my books tight and close to myself. I could hear my heart race and it was almost trying to jump out of my chest. I guessed my face looked terribly red. Levi's attention shifted from Hanji to me. I twitched out of surprise and froze again.

.

.

Silence.

.

.

And then Hanji spoke. "Oh, speaking through the eyes? I see, your relationship have deepened despite Levi's absence! How wonderful!"

.

"Hanji!" I suddenly exclaimed without thinking. Afterwards I just wanted to disappear at the instant – disappear in front of Levi as more embarrassing words come out from Hanji then I am so done. "I-It's not like that!" Then I covered my face with my books.

.

"Oh, that's not it?" Hanji sounded disappointed again.

.

"Well, aren't they enthusiastic as usual?" Erwin spoke. Looking at him, he grew really tall and adult-looking.

.

"Petra," I jumped hearing Levi spoke of my name.

.

"Y-Yes?!" I clumsily raised my voice out of shock. Always, it had always been like this. I feel disappointed in myself.

.

"During middle schoo-"

.

"A-Aah!" out of reflex to what Levi was about to say, I exclaimed and reasoned, "I'm late for my class!" then looked at my wristwatch for back up. I knew I didn't look believable but… that choice was more likely the one that will let me "escape" from the current situation. "I ha-have to go now!"

.

Staring at Levi for a while, he looked baffled. I averted my eyes and began running to my building.

.

"But Petra! You still have two hours left!" Hanji screamed. Why did you say that?!

.

"I need to study!" I reasoned. Hoping they would, even, slightly fall for it.

.

.

After that, I just ran off without looking back. I didn't want to see Levi's expression. I wasn't prepared. I wasn't ready. It was too sudden. It had been years since I last saw Levi. I felt like I haven't improved myself. I felt like I reverted back to my old self – or I didn't really change.

.

Then I recalled what mom told me. Slowly becoming an adult.

.

.

Mom, I think I had never took a step towards being an adult.

.

.

Note: The finale is almost up! Thank you guys for the reviews and favorites! 3