(A/N): From here, there are many ways the story can go. Their relationship can go fast or slow, and the scenes I already have written can completely change depending on which road I want to follow. I prefer for their love to build slow, yet sometimes I just really want them to be together. So whenever I'm conflicted like that, I tend to daydream and watch how they spend time together, and I end up writing what they want. Which sucks, because Baralai holds himself back all the time due to this deep-seated insecurity, so the more I write the closer I am to chipping it away.

I wonder if you can guess why's he scared of dating someone? :P

This is for Courtney! Thank you for reviewing. :3

Chapter 10 - Likeness

"Love is something far more than desire for sexual intercourse; it is the principal means of escape from the loneliness which afflicts most men and women throughout the greater part of their lives."

~ Bertrand Russell

Yunalesca succeeded at escaping him last night while he left to drive Yuna home, pretending to retire for the day by locking herself in her room. Today, he resolves to catch her awake sometime after lunch, but for now, he wants to leave early and get a haircut. His hair has gotten too long for his liking, his bangs able to reach his chin now if left flat. Half an hour later, Baralai will exit from the hair salon, pleased with the result.

Touching his hair, it feels shorter under his fingers and lighter on his head. He requested for the stylist to layer his locks, trimming his bangs just enough where he can still run his hand through them, parting them to the right side, but leaving a little bit of a sideburn on the left. She also used this coconut scented wax to give his look a soft spike. He smiles to himself, glad that he got what he wanted this time, and climbs into his car, driving to Auron's sushi shop.

As much as he hates being ripped away from his studies, today can't be a total loss when it involves spending time with his best friend. Although Baralai wonders why Gippal insisted on him dressing nicely (as if he doesn't already do that) when it'll just be the two of them, and amuses himself with the thought that he will never find a girlfriend at this rate if Gippal keeps going around acting like his gay lover.

Pulling into the plaza parking lot, he steps out and locks the car, pocketing his keys. Entering the restaurant, he hears the bell jingle before air conditioning assaults him cold. A young girl with curly auburn hair, wearing casual clothes under a black apron, greets him from across the room.

"Welcome! Be with you in a sec…" Once she finishes wiping the table clean, she turns and her eyes grow wide in surprise.

His eyes widen as well, and they both point their fingers in recognition. "It's you!"

She recovers first, laughing. "Look who finally decided to show up."

Baralai smiles, pleased to see her. "You've gotten taller," he says, emphasizing this by rubbing her head once he walked close enough. "You're finally old enough to start working?"

"Yeah. Kurgum's here, too, and― stop messing with my hair!"

"How can I not? You've become much more feminine all of a sudden. I find that adorable." He laughs out loud, enjoying her livid look and missing the light blush on her face. "Trying to impress someone?"

"Hmph. Maybe." She pouts, fixing her curls, and sticks her tongue out.

A stern, black-haired man hollers from the open kitchen, startling them both. "Chuami, stop fooling around. Direct the customer to his seat."

"But dad! It's Baralai!"

"I saw."

Baralai looks to the man he still likes to call his teacher and looks back to her, smiling. "May I have a seat at the bar? I'm meeting a friend."

"Sure. I'll get you some water."

"Can I have a coke as well?"

"Coming right up." She bows to him after leading him to the front, leaving the two alone.

Getting comfortable on a stool, Baralai folds his arms atop the counter and watches Auron prepare a roll of sushi, impressed by his dexterity. "How are you, sensei? I haven't seen you since I earned my black belt."

"As you can see, still manning the shop," Auron says, gruff as ever, "We can sure use the help."

"I'll be more interested in working here once summer comes around."

"Fair enough." He takes a quick look at him, grunting. "You carry yourself more like an old man every time you come in. Soon enough you're going to act older than me. I take it you're still babysitting your grandmother."

"Yes, well, I'm not tired because of that. I've grown really accustomed to taking care of her. That's not a problem. I, ah... didn't get much sleep last night," he says, rubbing his eye. "Too many thoughts on my mind."

"Problems?"

"No… not exactly. To be honest, I don't know what to call it. I'm starting to think I make my own problems. Oh, thank you." Baralai stops there, receiving his soda and popping the can open, pouring the drink in a tall, plastic cup full of ice Chuami procured for him.

She nods, folding the tray flat against her abdomen, and bows, departing with a proud smile.

"Since when do you drink soda?"

He shrugs. "Whenever I need the caffeine."

"Hn. Sounds like to me you're having women problems."

Baralai almost chokes in his drink, ducking to grab a clean napkin to wipe his mouth. "H-How?"

"I can tell. You remind me of myself when I was a little older than you."

"Really now? I'm curious to hear the stories of your mysterious youth," he says, teasing him.

"We both have an idiot friend to call our own who love to make our lives difficult."

"Don't we all? Speaking of which, Gippal is late. Why did I expect any different…?" Baralai mutters under his breath, checking his watch to confirm the time. "This must be my karmic destiny…"

A bell jingles in the background, signaling another customer. "Table for two. I'm waiting for… Oh! Baralai? Is that you?"

Recognizing the soft, familiar voice, his heart stops cold in his chest. He turns around in his seat against his wishes, catches one quick look at her, panics, and whips back around, hoping he can simply shrink and disappear into the countertop. He saw Yuna's smile, felt his heartbeat spike up ten million notches, and now he hears her walk over, threatening his already crumbling composure. Putting a hand to his temple, he ignores the amused look on Auron's face.

'My heart is not ready for this. It hasn't even been 24 hours since I last saw her!'

"Hey, is this seat taken?"

"No, go ahead." Straightening up in his stool, he strives to cool his red face and clears his throat, turning to face her only to realize he can't bring himself to look at her in the eye.

"Fancy meeting you here," she says, smiling, brushing back her hair as she settles down beside him. "Rikku told me she wanted to go out for sushi. I'm not surprised she's late, though. She did tell me she wanted to see Gippal for a bit."

Hearing those two names in the same sentence, Baralai wants to swear. "That's a full-blown lie if I ever heard one."

Her smile drops to a frown. "What do you mean?"

"It means I have two idiot friends who enjoy ruining my life. She isn't coming, and neither is Gippal. I should have known..." Whipping out his phone with a vengeance, Baralai speed dials him and counts the rings until he finally picks up.

"Hyello!"

"Where are you?"

"Getting busy with my girl," he says, singing out the syllables.

"The audacity of you. You're nothing but a heinous, impotent monkey."

"Whoa, whoa, whoa there. Calm your tits, bro. I'm sorry I jilted you on our special little date, but I'm doing you a favor here! I gotta say, though, couldn't have done it without Rikku's help. Ain't that right, babe?"

He hears him laugh in the background, and scowls. "I hate you." Hanging up, he drops his head into his arms, ready to give up on life. Is there no one he can trust in this world? "Why is this happening to me...?"

"Um… should I leave?"

"What? No. You don't have to." He meant to grab her knee to stop her from leaving, but he fumbled, grabbing her hand instead. Horrified by this mistake, he attempts to set it down somewhere and ends up slapping it on her thigh. Only now does it occur to him Yuna decided to wear a skirt. He likes the way it looks on her (after all, he loves pleated skirts) and rips his gaze away after realizing he had been staring, taking his hand back a moment too slow. "I-I'm sorry, I didn't mean to touch you there."

She blushes as well, possibly even darker, looking down at her lap. "That's okay. I-It was an accident."

They sit there in tense silence, unable to make eye contact or small talk without fear of worsening the atmosphere.

All of a sudden, Chuami cuts in between them, slamming two menus on the counter and causing both to jump in surprise. "Here you go. Menus for the cute, awkward couple."

Before the two flustered teenagers can react, she stomps off. Just then, a boy Chuami's age emerges from the back room, in the middle of tying his black apron, and he scrambles to catch the plastic tray his fellow employee shoves into his stomach. "You deal with them. I'm on break."

"O-Okay…" The soft-spoken boy watches her retreat out of sight, fuming up a storm, and scratches his head, confused. Turning to regard Auron for an explanation, he sees the man cooking as if nothing happened, obviously more equipped with tolerating his daughter's random tantrums than her childhood friend. He walks out from behind the register, seeing the quiet pair sitting nearby, and smiles.

Yuna fidgets in her seat, brushing a strand behind her ear, before turning towards him. "D-Do you, um, want to start eating without them?"

"Ah, sure. Since we're here and everything…"

They prop open their individual menus, hiding behind the selection of sushi and their pictures for comfort.

"Good afternoon," the server boy says, hands clasped in front of him. "Have you ordered, yet? I-I'll be replacing Chuami as your server."

Yuna reacts first, beaming at him. "Kurgum! Hi. It's nice to see you."

It takes Baralai a moment to register his presence, before breaking out into a grin. "Wow, you've really grown. I almost didn't recognize you."

"Y-Yeah. You can say I lost a lot of baby fat," he says, fiddling with his stud earring.

"Have you and Chuami entered high school, yet? Or did Auron finally decide to put you two under child labor?"

"Oh, no, he didn't," Kurgum says, horrified by his joke, and breathes in relief when Auron chooses not to react. "And not yet, but next year we will. Too bad we won't be seeing you. You're graduating this year, right?"

"Yes, but Yuna will still be around. Right?" Embarrassment forgotten for the moment, Baralai clasps his hands together in front of him and gives her a knowing look.

She reciprocates his mirth with a smile. "Yeah."

Perceiving their body language, he fidgets. "I, uh, didn't know you two were friends. But then again, I see you two in the same group a lot…"

"Yeah. We've become quite close the past several days, actually. Right, Baralai?"

Baralai smiles in spite of himself, lowering his arms. "That's right. It has been a crazy week, hasn't it?"

Yuna giggles, sipping her soda. "Mmhmm."

In the background, Auron sighs, amused by the scene of Kurgum's growing depression, and the unlikeliest of romance blooming between the quietest children he has come to watch grow up. "The 49ers roll and Caterpillar roll are ready!"

"Oh, right! Do you know what you want, or do you need more time?"

"Have you decided?" Yuna says, turning to her companion, "I already know what I want."

"Yes. May I have the Lion King roll?"

"And may I have my usual?"

"The deep-fried Titanic roll? Coming right up."

They nod, saying "thank you" as they hand him their closed menus.

Kurgum rushes to grab the plates that are hot and ready. "Um, who were these for again?"

"I don't know. Ask Chuami."

"Oh, man." He takes them anyway, departing in a hurry towards the family waving at him.

Baralai stares off into space, lost in thought while chewing on the end of his straw. 'Titanic as in the tragic love story? Wait, what am I doing? I'm reading too much into things…' Scared of interpreting it as a relationship doomed to begin with, he tries to think of it in a different light. Maybe the fact Yuna orders it as 'her usual' can pertain to her previous relationship. Recalling what Tidus said yesterday, it makes Baralai wonder: 'Was I the iceberg that sank their love?'

He grins, very amused by the analogy.

"I have a question," he says, breaking the silence.

"Hm?" She turns to him with a smile.

"Yesterday, Tidus told me something strange. That I was the reason you two broke up. I'm confused. What did he mean by that?"

"Oh, um…" This immediately flusters her, and he wishes he hadn't of asked. "I don't know how he knew that―."

"So I did do something."

"It's not like you did it on purpose! You weren't aware of it at the time. It's just… oh, gosh, I wasn't expecting this at all, um..." Yuna takes a deep breath to recollect herself, twiddling her fingers.

"We don't have to talk about it if you don't want to. I should have known it was an awkward question," he says, trying to comfort her.

"No, it's okay. Like you said before, it does involve you. Kind of. You deserve to know." She turns in her seat, gathering the courage to look up at him. "Remember that day I ran into you at Barnes and Noble?"

"...ah, vaguely. I'm sorry, I don't exactly recall."

"It was back in winter break, the week of New Year's. That was also around the same time Tidus and I were getting into these huge arguments. The same, old arguments that kept coming back from past, er, 'small' arguments. He made me feel insecure about a lot of things, and I didn't know who to talk to. I felt like everyone was expecting us to be this great, happy couple, because we had been together for so long. Our families are friends, and we have the same circle of friends, and... I don't know, I was afraid of judgement. And then, I saw you." Her somber speech lightens up a notch, making way for serenity to seep into her next words, and she tilts her head to give him a soft smile.

This causes him to return the smile, encouraging her to continue.

"Back then, I wouldn't call us friends. Not yet, at least. But we knew each other, because Gippal was dating Rikku, and when they introduced us... I don't know how to explain it, but a part of me could tell you were a really nice person."

Baralai switches to his water, fiddling with the straw to ease his nerves. It makes him anxious to hear her talk about him, because he wants to hear more, wants to know what role he played in Yuna's life during a time he felt so distant from everything. She has him enraptured, and he can't bring himself to break eye contact.

"Well, one day, I wanted to be alone, so I thought 'why not hang around B&N,' right? It's nice and quiet, full of books to lose myself in. I wasn't expecting to find anyone I knew there, until I noticed you sitting in the cafe. You were alone, but you looked busy, so... I didn't want to bother you. All I wanted to do was say hi and be on my way, but…" She pauses there, her whole face lighting up with a pink glow. "You stopped whatever you were doing and invited me to join you. I don't know why, maybe it was the way I looked to you, but you really reached out to me. I remember it like it was yesterday."

"I think it's starting to come back to me," he says, careful not to cut her off. Leaning forward on his arms, he looks to the collection of drinks tiered on the high shelf hanging above the chef's kitchen, thoughtful. "I didn't know you well, but you looked so quiet ― so unlike yourself without our friends around ― I assumed you always put up a front to appear strong."

"Yeah. I'm like that," she says, embarrassed, but quick to defend herself. "But the only reason you noticed is because you do the exact same thing."

He laughs. "You caught me."

"We talked about a lot of things that day, things I don't remember... but I remember the feeling," she says, reminiscing, "We even managed to talk about relationships at some point. I began with the intention to talk about myself, wanting advice, and I ended up just listening to you instead. You had so much confidence in what you wanted in a partner, and so many wonderful thoughts on what your idea of an ideal relationship was like, I wanted to emulate that! I would never forget what you told me, saying things like 'you should be with someone who respects you for who you are' and 'you know the person loves you when they show how much they respect your feelings.' Stuff like that. After that, I sat down to reevaluate myself and my relationship. I found out, much to my dismay, that there were a lot of little things I wasn't happy about that just kept piling up over time… It was a very hard decision to make, and I almost went back on it, but when I broke up with him, I wanted to believe it was the right thing to do. I wanted to respect our differences, but at the same time I didn't want to lead both of us on with false hopes, you know?"

"I see." He smiles, content. "What a tale of self-discovery."

"I-I'm sorry, you probably didn't want to hear all that. I mean, w-we're in the middle of a date, and I'm sitting here talking about my ex," she says, panicking, but panicking more so when realizing she voiced the thought out loud, "...u-unless you don't think want to think of it as a date―."

"Not at all, I― I don't mind it," he says, just as tongue-tied, "The date. I meant the date. And talking. I don't mind you talking." He clears his throat, self-conscious. "I had asked, because I wanted to know, so it's not any of your fault. I'm surprised, though. I never knew I had such an influence on you, considering how 'close' we were then."

"Well…" She fidgets in her seat, bashful. "I really admired you. Not as much as I do now, but… seeing you so mature and serious about the same stuff I was, I felt a lot more validated in my principles, like I wasn't the odd one out, you know?"

"Oh? Did you feel lonely?" he says, flavoring the remark with mirth.

"Yes," she says in a mumble, brightening up, "But now, whenever I'm with you, I don't feel lonely anymore."

'Yet whenever you're not around, I feel lonely.' Baralai chooses not to voice the thought.

When their orders finally arrive, any desire for more conversation subsides, and they dig in. Only the simplest of words are exchanged as they swap pieces to taste each other's choices, and they order another roll to share, eager to bask in the natural contentment and quiet between them.