A Matter of Pride: Chapter ten; Uneasiness

What was Slade planning? It had been easy to follow the giant robotic worms and tunnel through the earth (duh), and it would have been even if Raven hadn't been... eh... helping. It was easy to find the computer. Robin started to hack into it... That was when Slade appeared. In truth, Terra was frightened at seeing her master again. She had followed his orders as best she could, but... he didn't need a reason to punish her. Luckily, he was much too interested in beating up Robin to worry about her. Raven took over the job of hacking into it.

"It would be easier just to smash it!" Terra called over a boulder and sent it toward the computer.

"No!" Raven's powers coated her boulder and the conflicting black and yellow was interesting, as always, to look at. Terra scowled.

"Why don't you trust me? I won't hurt anyone, I promise!"

Raven didn't trust her because she didn't believe that Terra suddenly had such good control. She had to meditate every day! Did Terra think that trust came with just a pretty show? It was something that had to be earned! And she could start by having trust in Raven.

Terra had only a second to think, but in that second her mind whirled. She was Slade's apprentice. Her mission was to earn the Titans' trust and betray them on Slade's whim. If she persisted in trying to gain control over Raven, that trust would never be hers and she would fail her mission. The Titans would stay alive. But Terra... Terra would die. Terra had almost made up her mind to insist. She chickened out and bowed her head, relinquishing her part of the struggle. Satisfied, Raven allowed it to drop and turned back to the computer. The drill had continued its malicious mission during their tussle. The ceiling had loosened enough to drop a huge boulder onto the CPU they were trying to break into. Terra and Raven leaped away, just in time.

Unfortunately, it was then proved that smashing the computer... was a very bad idea.

"Okay... maybe that wasn't such a good idea," Terra said sheepishly, smiling to ward off Raven's poisonous glare. The red laser-drills intensified three, four times and the sluggish circle sped up. The drills broke through the surface, dooming Titans' Tower. It began to sink. Without letting herself ponder (beyond hoping in a small section of her brain that Slade would not perceive the action as one of betrayal toward him), Terra jumped onto the boulder that covered Slade's CPU and channeled her locked power into a beam. She was trying desperately to force the Tower back into place. It was too heavy. She couldn't do it. If she kept this up, she'd collapse and be crushed.

A black beam joined her gold and Terra spared a glance to her side. Raven ignored her but pushed her own powers harder. Raven was helping her? Feeling energized, Terra pushed harder too. The rocky column rumbled to a stop and then slowly, slowly, began to rise again. In the corner of her eye, Terra could see Robin smiling.

---

"So... friends?" Terra asked later, apprehensively holding out her hand to Raven. The hallway was dark and the others were no where to be found, but Raven wasn't worried and so neither was Terra.

"Close enough," the dark Titan replied, shaking her hand.

"Still hate me?"

"No. That surprises me a little bit; it took me a year to stop hating Beast Boy!"

They both laughed softly and Raven opened a door. The two entered. The door shut behind them, leaving them in pitch blackness.

"Where are we?"

"Your room," Raven replied and switched on the lights.

"Surprise!" cheered the four other Titans, suddenly revealed. Terra gasped, eyes wide. The room was beautiful; well, in a typically Titans sense. It included, among other things, a circular couch, a wall that was really a window, and a fancy computer in the corner.

"All this... is for me?"

"Yeah," Robin said. "You saved our Tower. It's the least you deserve... Oh, and this, too. If you still want it." He offered her a yellow Titans' communicator. Terra's eyes went so wide that she almost thought they would fall out. She accepted the communicator almost reverently.

"I... I don't know what to say... thank you so much!"

"Aw, isn't that sweet?" Cyborg cooed. "Alright! I'm making waffles!"

"Mm!"

"Can mine be non-dairy?"

"You guys go ahead," Terra called as they filed out the door - her door. "I... I need a minute..." It shut and she was suddenly alone. Terra took out her clip and fingered it, her blond hair falling to cover half her face as usual.

"They trust me... I can't believe it... they actually trust me."

Terra wasn't sure if that was good or bad.

---

Weeks passed. Each night, Terra would send an email to Slade with the computer in her room. Each morning, she would receive instructions on ways to further deceive them. Things during the day went smoothly. She was slowly being integrated into Titans life, and not just the crime-fighting part. She played video games with Cyborg and Beast Boy, often whooping their butts, she worked with Cyborg and Raven on their precious car, she worked with Robin to improve her hand-to-hand, and taste-tested Starfire's cooking. The others were amazed when she continually survived the experience. Each time, she just smiled. Terra never mentioned the hard times in her life when she had found herself scrounging through dumpsters... or eating Keb's food. She had loved her brother with all her heart, but the boy just could not cook.

Throughout it all, though, Terra deliberately kept herself uneasy. She did not relax as much as it looked like to the others. She did not laugh quite as hard as she could. She smiled with her lips, but never her eyes. She reminded herself that this was temporary and that, eventually, Slade would command her true loyalties to be revealed. She continually told herself that the Titans were not her friends, no matter how much she felt like they were. If they became friends to her, she would not betray them and none of them would survive Slade's probable wrath.

None of them noticed her uneasiness, not even Raven. They trusted her. She was a Titan.