Chris' POV

I toss and turn, unable to fall asleep again.

I had a nightmare - I have them a lot.

PJ dies in a lot of them.

This time, it was Phil.

In the dream, the sun was just rising, all of us - Me, Dan, Phil, PJ, and Jack - were in the middle of an unknown city. People were turning, and everywhere that served as a shelter was locked. We were trapped, in a sense.

We all thought that we were safe, until Phil collapsed, and chocked out "Run."

Everyone ran, but Dan and I.

Phil changed, right in front of us.

Even though it was a dream, it seemed all too real.

I stared up at the ceiling for a while, trying to block out my thoughts, to no avail.

I step silently out my room, the slight change of temperature making me shiver.

I hear Jack crying.

I prentend I can't hear it.

I hear voices in the kitchen, but in my tired state, I can't make out who they are or what they're saying.

I run a hand through my hair, which is knotted and messy, but I couldn't care less, absently walking into the kitchen.

"Chris." Phil murmurs, smiling at me.

I rub my eyes, when I notice Dan.

I look away quickly, hoping that the 'fight' between him and PJ wouldn't result in him hating me, too.

"Hello," Dan says with a friendly smile, raising a mug to his lips.

I stretch my arms out, yawning.

"Hm, I feel like hell."

My voice echos, and I see PJ darting toward the kitchen, and standing in the doorway when he sees Dan.

"You're awake,"

PJ.

"Mmhm," I hum with a small nod.

I watch as Phil hands PJ a mug. I'm guessing tea.

PJ glances from me, to Dan, to Phil. He closes his eyes, walking back to the lounge before I could say anything else.

"I think I'm gonna check on him." I shrug.

Dan sighs.

Phil sips.

I leave.

Jack's POV

I can't do this

I really can't

I'm sitting with my head in my hands sobbing, what I hope is quietly. I don't want to bother them.

I don't want to be a burden to them anymore

What do I do though?

I sigh shakily as I manage to stop my sobs. I stand up slowly, making my way towards the door. I open it

Chris

"hey"

I mumble a small hi, keeping my eyes on the floor.

A pause

"I miss him too"

I look up to see Chris giving me a sympathetic look.

Anger

"No you don't"

His expression turns to hurt

"Jack-"

"No"

I say as I push past him, not caring what room I end up in, as long as I'm away from him. Sure he knew Dean, they did a video together once, but, No one knows Dean the way I did. No one loved him like I did.

Tears escape my eyes again as I lean against the wall.

That's when I realize

I'm in the kitchen

Several thoughts cross my mind as I look around the room through my tear filled vission

Food

Knifes

I stare at the next item

A gun

I slowly make my way towards it, picking it up and turning the small silver item over in my hands.

"Jack, I'm sorry, just-"

I hear Chris say, stopping dead as he realizes I have the gun in my hands

"What are you doing with that?" He asks in a calm voice

I give him an annoyed look back. Does he really think I'm going to kill myself?

…should I do that?

He gives me a more worried look as he looks behind him, almost like he's looking around for help

His help arrives

PJ walks in the room

He looks between Chris and I, a look of fear soon taking over his features as well

"Jack"

He says softly

"put the gun down"

"no"

They glance at each other, swapping worried looks.

"Jack, please"

Chris tries this time, taking a small step towards me

"No"

I say louder, raising a shaking hand to the side of my head. I trace my finger over the trigger, staring straight ahead

"Jack, please don't do this, please"

I smile softly at them

"why, nobody wants me. Without Dean, I have no one"

I grip the gun harder, my knuckles turning white

"Jack, please!"

Chris shouts, tears forming in his eyes

"goodbye"

A bang

Darkness