A/N: Personally, I'm not really satisfied with the length of this chapter, however I believe it's one of the most important I've written so far because I focused mostly on developing the characters' pasts which I hope you guys find as interesting as I did while writing them.
Also, I'd like to thank you for taking the time to read this. I know my updates are sort of incompetent but between school and studying I have limited free time. Add to that that I'm working on other stories as well because I like torturing myself. There's no need to worry, however. This story isn't going to be abandoned. I'm planning on going through with it till the end no matter what. I'm already ahead with the plot so there's no need to worry about that too. More chapters will be coming soon so stay tuned. And again, thanks for reading!
Rarely did Riven get upset but whenever she did it lasted for a couple of hours before she calmed down completely. That confrontation with Caitlyn was different though because it brought back memories she struggled to erase. She realized Caitlyn's point, she admitted to herselfBellmoor's failure, she could still hear the screams and she the endless rivers of blood in her dreams and sometimes she could even choke on her regret but that didn't give the other Pulsefire agent the right to act the way she did. It wasn't fair. She was just as charged guilty as herself for the Bellmoor massacre. The result of that was that Riven couldn't concentrate properly on the task at hand, so her visits at the museums had turned out to be completely fruitless, thus she returned back to the headquarters more frustrated than ever before.
"You're back already?" Shen raised his head off the diary to look at her while she stormes inside.
"What do you think?" she spat as she dropped herself on a chair, crossing her arms.
Shen raised a brow. "You seem upset. Did something happen?"
Riven blew some of her hair strings off her face. "Nothing happened."
"Both you and I know you're a terrible liar." Shen abandoned his task and went over to seat opposite her. Riven sighed.
"It's Caitlyn." she admitted. "I just can't stand the way she's treating the whole of us! Like we're some pieces of garbage! Everyone makes mistakes, bigger or smaller, why can't see realize that?"
It was a desperate cry for justice. Riven could understand Caitlyn's anger up to a point. From that point and after thought, she found her behavior completely unfair. Riven had paid the price for her mistakes. She didn't need Caitlyn to confront her more.
"I see now." Shen nodded in understanding. "It's about Bellmoor, isn't it?"
Riven huffed. "It's always been about Bellmoor. Don't tell me you haven't noticed."
"I have. Now do tell me what happened between you two." Shen insisted and so Riven narrated their confrontation outside their headquarters.
"I see..." Shen said sceptically. "And you told her that her pride..."
"...will be her downfall." Riven completed his sentence, slightly annoyed. "I literally just said that."
Shen smiled. "Well, you're not absolutely wrong. Though, I must point out that there are things you don't know about Caitlyn."
Riven was caught off guard. "What do you mean?"
"I mean that you shouldn't judge a book by its cover if you want to be adjective."
"I don't care about having an adjective view on her. It's pretty clear that she's a bitch-"
"Look." Shen interrupted her rant somewhat impatiently. "The thing with Caitlyn is that she doesn't easily open up, thus there are aspects of her life you've never even heard of. Don't be quick to judge. I know it's not fair that she treats you and the rest of us the way she does and I totally get it, but I'm not so mad at her as I probably should be. "
"What are you talking about?" Riven narrowed her eyes at him. "Is there something more you know that me an Tobias don't?"
"Actually, yes. But only because I put my nose in places I shouldn't be." Shen admitted. "Anyways, point is thatafter the whole Bellmoor disaster Caitlyn's behavior really surprised me because I always thought of her as a composed and logical person. I did some research on my own. And well, to be honest I don't exactly blame her at this point."
"I still don't understand. What's so special about Caitlyn that excuses her behavior?"
"I didn't mention anything about excuses. Nothing can excuse her. I'm just trying to help you understand her." Shen pointed out.
"Don't try to use the «sad story» card on me because I'm seriously going to-"
Shen ignored her. "Her father was a prominent politician. Her mother, on the other hand, was a prodigious inventor. She pioneered in time-travelling technology and much of the equipment we use today is her inventions. Unfortunately, they were killed in a terrible accident years ago. I'm not sure how old Caitlyn was when this happened but my guess is that she was fairly young."
Riven was left speechless. All her hatred towards the sniper's face was replaced in an instant with sympathy. But it didn't last long.
"My guess was that she became a chrono-agent for one and only reason. To find out how her parents were killed and perhaps revert the result." Shen elaborated.
"She can't do that, can she? It's against the Agency's policy."
Shen nodded in confirmation. "Technically yes. However, I'm convinced that she believed she'd get the authorization to do so if she became the best out of the best, do you understand me?"
"Like some sort of favor, right?" Riven inquired. She had already started understanding what was really going on. "But Bellmoor was a complete distaster for her career. It would stigmatize her forever. Is this why...?"
"She put the entire blame on us while avoiding any responsibility? Yes." Shen nodded. "And our superiors were willing to believe her word and not investigate any further. You know the rest of the story."
"I don't fucking believe it." Riven murmured. "We spent months and months behind offices, endlessly trapped into office tasks, away from the fields, just because she..." she trailed off.
"It sounds selfish, I know." Shen ran a hand through his hair. "But I feel like I can understand her up to some point because I chose this career path for similar reasons." he let out a sigh. "Do you understand now? Everyone carries their own demons, others more monstrous and others less."
Riven understood. She remembered him explaining once when she had asked him why he had joined the Timeline Protection Agency. She remembered briefly his expression, similar with the one he wore at this moment, when he talked about his missing father.
"Have you got any news of him?" she asked softly.
Shen shook his head no. "There's nothing. It's like he's vanished. Sometimes, I beatify Caitlyn because she is aware of her parents' fate. On the other hand, I still live in the darkness with probably a fake hope that he's still somewhere alive. I wish I had the guts to do what Caitlyn did. Maybe then I would have answers. But she's always been far more ambitious than I've ever been."
"You'll find the truth." she reassured him. "And you don't have to become manipulative like her to find your father. You're better than that."
"Thanks," he said gracefully with a said smile. "I hope now you know the full story you won't be quick to judge her."
"My opinion on her hasn't changed." Riven declared. "I can understand why, I might be a little bit more empathetic towards her, but it's still no excuse. I'm still mad."
"And you got every right to be." Shen nodded. "Anyways, I need to get back at it." he motioned at the open diary.
"I'll help you!" Riven exclaimed. "The museums I visited had no exhibits sold by Ezreal so it's basically a dead end. It's the best I can do right now." she explained with a shrug.
"Help is always welcomed." Shen smiled at her while he stood up off the chair.
"This is our last chance, guys. If we fail again, then there will be a price to pay. Caitlyn, we are counting on you to land the shot."
Shen's voice was commanding, yet it almost sounded smoothing. As if he was trying to reassure her that everything was going to be fine so as not to miss. She wouldn't miss, for that she was certain. What she was uncertain about was what would follow. They've tried so many times and always failed miserably. This was their last opportunity and she'd make the best out of it."Embrace yourselves," she spoke to the mic one last time. She heard her team members heavy breathing as they anticipated together. Herself she held her own breath back and tried to calm her heartbeat to a minimum, to the point she could barely feel it. By now she had already gotten used to the procedure of concentrating on her target.Then, loud banging filled the air alongside screams. She saw him. Zero hesitation to uphold her, she pulled the trigger.But it didn't stop him.She knew she hadn't missed, yet she couldn't comprehend how this thing was still moving and killing. She saw Riven lashing herself at him and Shen assisting her but he was fast and flexible. Four shots, four victims. He didn't care about the agents that struggled to stop him. He managed to trap them and continue his «art work». Tobias teleported behind him and tried to stun him. But he had predicted this move. He stunned him as well and prepared to end it all for Tobias Fate. But not under Caitlyn's watch. This time however she missed, for the PROJECT trace had moved just in time."You lack elegance." he spoke with his mechanic voice. "But it's not what bothers me. These people are criminals, you should be eliminating them instead of protecting them."Caitlyn cringed. She couldn't believe in her ears. Kill innocent people for the simple reason they weren't as lucky in life as others? She refused to respond. So did he. His only words were, "I have an artwork to complete."And then, there was endless rivers of blood. And Caitlyn lost all focus.
Caitlyn never had a problem with concentrating. This absentminded attitude of hers was something completely new to her. And she knew all too well why she was in such position. Even though she investigated thoroughly a couple of museums, at the end of the day she realized she'd need to investigate again, for she hadn't been paying much attention to details as her mind was traveling somewhere else, somewhere she wished to forget. Because Riven's confrontation had rang unpleasant memories.
Memeories that consisted mostly of endless rivers of blood and screams.
It was getting dark in Piltover. Most people had withdrawn back to the safety of their homes. The only sound that could be heard as Caitlyn walked down the pavement was the clicking of her boots. Yet, in her ears all she could hear was screams and pleadings, children crying, asking for their parents... And then, all out of a sudden, one of the children was herself... Caitlyn stopped abruptly. She didn't dare to close her eyes as she knew what she'd see with the imagination eyes... She didn't want to look back at those memories. Instead, she tried to put her focus on something else. She looked forward with her piercing gaze, trying to slash through the fog that had appeared out of nowhere. A very common phenomon for that region of Piltover since it was located near the coastline.
Inside the fog, her inner demons yelled relentlessly while she fought against them, alone.
Alone.
Alone.
She hated being lonely.
She hated being alone and scared to death. She clenched her chest. The weight in it was almost unbearable.
So many mistakes. Mistakes made in order not to be alone no more. Yet, she was more alone than ever before. She had pushed everyone away. And now that the reminiscing of the Bellmoor fiasco was knocking on her door once again, she was more lonely than ever before. And she was terrified. There was no one out there to care about her well-being.
Caitlyn realized her mistakes. She wasn't that blind nor that arrogant to believe that Bellmoor was exclusively her team's fault. Because she was part of said team, she was literally right there. Bellmoor wasn't just a minor setback to her plan, it was almost determining factor to show her how far she was willing to go.
Apparently, too far.
And yet, here she was. Alone and scared. Just like she was twelve years ago.
And whose fault was it again? Right. Hers.
She made choices and those choices had irreversible results. Instead of looking back, maybe she should focus on what's important now. She was aware of her goals. After all, she got nothing else to loose. Only gain. She lowered her hand off her chest. Her heartbeat had returned back to normal. The voices had faded away. She looked over her shoulder. A black cat ran across the street, her eyes glimmering. She looked again in front of her. There was only mist. She couldn't see too well in a great distance, just as she couldn't see her future. But if she was sure about one thing, that would be reaching her goal. No matter the price. And in order to do that, she had to capture Ezreal.
But first, there were some things she needed to fix. She wasn't completely heartless. She knew how sensitive Riven could be and she felt guilty for treating and talking to her like that. An apology was on the line as well.