A/N: Sorry this is a short chapter. Should have another chapter up tomorrow, just have to finish polishing it up. A relaxing day is definitely good for my muse.
Killian was glad of Henry's knowledge about the Apprentice's key. A little ruse on David's part had been required to successfully retrieve the key and Killian had tried not to laugh when Dave told them what had transpired in the sheriff's station. Liam was able to use it to unlock the spell on Merlin's underworld residence. It was the first real progress in their effort to overthrow Hades. A short search yielded the storybook in the library but pages were missing so they split up once again to find the pages about Hades.
When both Liam and Emma had disappeared during the search, Killian felt the need to find them and make sure nothing was amiss. He found them outside and could have sworn it sounded as though they were arguing. He had sensed tension between them earlier and hadn't said anything because he thought he was imagining it. It was just the Underworld getting to his mind.
"Emma, Liam, what's going on?" Killian queried.
"She thinks I lied to you." Liam explained. Emma had mentioned earlier that Liam had set off her superpower, but Killian just couldn't believe his brother would lie.
"He took the pages. I can prove it. Ask him to show you his hands. He's been hiding them since I got here," Emma demanded.
"Look if it'll help to clear things up, I'd be happy to." Liam acquiesced.
"That won't be necessary. I don't need proof to know what's really going on here. Emma, when are you going to admit this is not really about my brother?"
Emma shook her head in confusion. "What else would you think it was about?"
"Us. You think that if you can prove Liam is a villain that I'll somehow feel like I was less of one. That you can convince me I'm worth saving and that we've got a future together." Killian whispered. Voicing how he'd had felt since she found him, didn't make Killian feel any better. He just felt guilty. He didn't deserve to be saved. He was a liar, a murderer and he had almost hurt everyone he cared about just for the sake of revenge. He HAD hurt Emma, probably more than she would admit. She might have forgiven him, but he wasn't convinced he wouldn't hurt her again.
"You agree with him?" Emma's voice raised.
"Why should I go back, when I can just move on?" Killian demanded. Killian stole a glance at her and she looked distraught. He couldn't bring himself to look her in the eyes. He had to let her go. She wouldn't be stuck here if it wasn't for him. He wanted her to be safe from him.
"After we defeat Hades, I won't be returning with you. My fate isn't in Storybrooke, it should be determined here." Killian turned away, unable to bear the pain he was causing her.
"It doesn't have to be. You can come home, Killian," Emma pleaded. "You just have to forgive yourself. Thing is, no matter how many times I tell you or anyone else does: you have to do it yourself." Emma, tear streaming down her cheek, pushed past him and ran.
"Emma!" Killian began to walk after her, regretting his words.
"Perhaps it's for the best," Liam said, pressing his hand into Killian's chest, stopping him from going after her.
"I doubt she will be as understanding or accepting as you think. Her family has this thing about not giving up, especially on those they love, and she certainly inherited that trait." Killian noticed a smudge mark on his brother's hand. He removed Liam's hand from his chest and looked at it. It was covered in black ink. Emma had been right. Killian felt like a bloody idiot for not believing her.
Emma had been walking absentmindedly through the mansion, not focused on finding the pages that were missing from the Underworld version of the book. She felt like she really needed her parents advice and comfort. It still sometimes felt strange to Emma, how much she depended on her family. She really had come a long way from the girl who thought she was nothing but a lost girl, with no one who loved her. Now her love for Killian had driven her to ends she never thought herself capable though she was still behaving slightly like she had as the Dark One, thinking about herself rather than others. She couldn't, no... she wouldn't, be like that any longer. She suddenly heard a door close and followed the noise to the exterior of the house. Emma found Liam standing at the well.
Emma really wished Liam wasn't there, but Liam loved Killian just as much as she did and he was probably trying to protect him. That didn't stop her from hating the elder Jones brother for lying to Killian. Several times now and Emma really couldn't understand why.
"Find anything out here?" Emma questioned, wondering if Liam would acknowledge her without the snark and self righteousness of their earlier conversation.
"Emma!" Liam hid his hands in his pockets and turned to her. "I'm afraid a ship's captain can only be cooped up inside so long. I had to come out and get some air. What brings you here?" LIE.
Liam was lying again. Damn him. Emma took the chain out of her pocket that held Killian's ring. Well, she supposed it was Liam's ring.
"I wanted to show you this." Emma opened her hand exposing the ring.
"It's the ring I gave Killian. I noticed he wasn't wearing it," Liam replied, seemingly curious why she had it.
"Because he gave it to me," Emma said, watching him Liam's eyes widen at her words, understanding flooding into them. Emma had to wonder if Liam really doubted the love she and Killian shared. That it wasn't true, because it most certainly was and would always be.
"You know what he told me when he did? That it belonged to a much better man than him."
Liam pursed his lips and looked away, unable to meet Emma's gaze. Another sure sign he was hiding something.
"You're his hero. He doesn't think he can do any wrong. Which is why I can't figure out why you would lie to him," Emma sighed.
"Emma, Liam, what's going on?" Killian queried, walking up to them.
"She thinks I lied to you." He was lying and Emma knew it. Her emotions weren't clouding her superpower as much as she had hoped they were.
"He took the pages. I can prove it. Ask him to show you his hands. He's been hiding them since I got here," Emma demanded.
"Look if it'll help to clear things up, I'd be happy to." Smug bastard knew just what to say to keep that from happening.
"That won't be necessary. I don't need proof to know what's really going on here. Emma, when are you going to admit this is not really about my brother?"
Emma shook her head in confusion. "What else would you think it was about?"
"Us. You think that if you can prove Liam is a villain that I'll somehow feel like I was less of one. That you can convince me I'm worth saving and that we've got a future together." Killian whispered. He couldn't look her in the eyes. He was full of so much self loathing.
"You agree with him?" Emma was angry that after everything, he still didn't think he was worthy of love and happiness. And that Liam was reinforcing Killian's insecurities was just awful.
"Why should I go back, when I can just move on?" Killian demanded.
Emma wanted to shout: To be with me. For our future. She couldn't speak it out loud because it was simply too selfish. And she had made a promise to herself to stop being selfish.
"After we defeat Hades, I won't be returning with you. My fate isn't in Storybrooke, it should be determined here." Killian glanced at her briefly and turned away. Emma could see the tears forming in his eyes, knowing it pained him to hurt her.
"It doesn't have to be. You can come home, Killian," Emma pleaded. "You just have to forgive yourself. Thing is, no matter how many times I tell you or anyone else does: you have to do it yourself."
Emma knew she couldn't make the decision for him. A tear streamed down her cheek, she couldn't look at Killian or Liam any longer, her anger and pain was starting to overwhelm her. She needed to get away from them before she starting sobbing or punched someone, so she pushed past Killian and ran. And to her complete disappointment, he didn't follow her. Emma couldn't return to the loft. She thought of her house and then she was there. She went to their... her bedroom and climbed under the sheets. She knew Liam was right. If she loved him, she had to let him go and if he wanted to come back with her, well that needed to be his choice too. Emma sobbed into the pillow until she couldn't any longer. She wished for sleep but she knew it wouldn't come.