Hey guys! WOOT! finally! it's done! the story is COMPLETE! thank you so much for reading, i hope you have enjoyed the story! please review! this is the last chapter! Sorry for the wait!
ENJOY!
Note: Also, i would like to apologize for the 8's as the stroy breaker, it seems that my "add ruler" is not working right now...hope the 8's don't distract you too much!
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Epilogue-Starting Over
"BEAST BOY!"Robin held onto the fallen boy tightly, his tears dropping onto the changeling's face. His body shook as the body in his arms grew cold fast. Behind him, the titans rushed to see the damage. Starfire gasped as she spotted Beast boy, curled in Robin's arms as the said teen held Beast boy close, tears falling fast from his unmasked eyes.
"No…" Raven whispered and Speedy and Aqualad glanced at the group with sad eyes.
Cyborg though kneeled before Robin though and gently took Beast boy from Robin's arms.
"He's still got a pulse, if we can get him back to the tower, we could save him,"
And the titans traveled back to the tower as fast as they could. Robin fallowing with a dead look in his eyes, his mask forgotten on the floor of the old building. It was still pouring out, but the stinging rain was forgotten as they rushed to save their friend.
But the night was fading fast and so was Beast boy. And with no transportation other then by feet, they wouldn't make it in time. Cyborg was the first to realize this and glanced around for any large vehicle. To save Beast boy they would have to steal a car, something Cyborg thought he would never do.
But he really didn't have a choice, it was either steal or let Beast boy die. Looking down at the fast fading boy in his arms, Cyborg gritted his teeth. They needed to get to the tower right now, or Beast boy would be lost forever. Stopping, Cyborg yelled up at Raven.
"Hey Rae! Think you could get that car to start with your magic?"
"You want me to steal a car?" she asked, floating down to him as he stood next to a large SUV.
"Yes,"
"But Cyborg!" Starfire cut in, the rest of the titans stopping behind them, "we do not do evil,"
"He's dying! If we don't get him back to the tower right now, he'll be gone, is that what you want!"
"Enough, it's just one car, we'll return it later," and with that said Raven jump-started the car and they headed to the tower.
Arriving at the tower was just minutes away, yet, it was the seconds that mattered. Beast boy, who was still suffering the effects of the drug, looked paler with every shallow breath. He wasn't going to make it, there was no time. Nothing could stop the death that was upon him. Robin, who sat next to him, leaned down over him and rested his temple against Beast boy's, whispering gently as a new wave of tears was held back.
But it didn't matter; Beast boy was dead before they even reached the tower.
Shooting up in a cold sweat, Robin tried to steady his breath as best he could. His dream, the same one, he'd been having for days now. And it was a lie; Beast boy was all right, at least, as all right as someone recovering from a neither death could be. Swinging his feet to the cold floor of the titan tower, Robin let his eyes adjust to the darkness that plunged the building. Midnight, it was only midnight. Robin glared at the red digital numbers that flashed in the darkness. He had only been asleep for two hours and had the same dream twice already.
Slipping on a black t-shirt and black sweat pants, Robin poked his head into the hallway, making sure no one was walking by. Just because he had went to bed already didn't mean the others had. Though, he doubted anyone but Cyborg was up. But just in case, the dark-haired leader walked quietly down the quiet hall, heading to the medical rooms.
As he entered the dark rooms, Robin did infact find that Cyborg was still up. Suddenly very aware that he hadn't put his mask on, Robin felt shyness he didn't realize he had creep up. Beast boy seeing his eyes was one thing, but for the others to look at him directly without the mask, it was such a …naked feeling.
But Beast boy was more important then some stupid mask. So, keeping his embarrassment hidden, Robin entered the overly clean room. It wasn't as dark in the medical room; the large window allowed the moonlight to shine in, that and Cyborg's Tec was glowing brightly.
"Robin!" Cyborg gasped quietly, he hadn't expected anyone to be in the medical rooms this late. Usually he would have gone to bed by now, but he wanted to make sure that Beast boy was alright. And well, it was more of a shock to see the teen standing out of uniform and without a mask.
"Hey, how is he holding up?"
But the shock wore off quickly as his attention was turned back to Beast boy, who lay sleeping next to him, wires hooked up to him.
"He's doing better, still quite a ways until he's fully healed though, he won't be going out on missions any time soon,"
Robin nodded, of course Beast boy won't, it was too dangerous for right now. Stepping close, Robin noticed that the human forum of Beast boy had vanished completely and he was now staring at the lover that he was used to. The pale skin was no longer present, but the light, pleasant green was instead. His ears were no longer round and his hair no longer a dark brown.
Cyborg noticing that Robin was staring at Beast boy smirked, " nice to see him as himself uh? That drug that Nicolas had given him, it didn't start wearing off until Monday. I didn't think it would take this long for him to change back."
"It's because of the injury, it slowed down the process because his mind could only do so much at once,"
Cyborg stared at Robin with a dumbfounded look. "Uh, yeah, man," but a yawn interrupted Cyborg's confusion and the oldest titan glanced at the clock.
"Well, I'm off to bed, you should sleep too, Robin. He'll be alright by himself,"
"Yes, I know, I just want to check on something's myself, if that's ok with you,"
Cyborg yawned again and headed for the door, waving a good night to the leader of the titans, "yea, whatever you want," and he was gone, leaving Robin and Beast boy alone.
Once Robin was sure that they really were alone, he carefully sat on the edge of the medical bed, placing one hand over Beast by's body to rest on the mattress, his arm hovering over the sleeping boy. It was hard to not freak out and hold him close and kiss him and cuddle him when the others were around. After all, they had no idea that him and Beast boy had gotten together, infact, as far as Robin knows, they didn't even know that he swung that way.
Sooner or later though, they would have to tell them and however they reacted was something Robin didn't know. But no matter, what, they were still a team and they would still have to work together, even if thy disliked what they two boys were doing. Sighing, Robin leaned down and rested his forehead against Beast boy's,
"Hey," he whispered loudly and Beast boy's eyes fluttered and the younger titan gave a little moan and turned his head slightly, "wake up," Robin whispered again, chuckling. This time, Beast boy cracked open an eye and stared up at Robin with a hazy green stare.
"Robin?" he asked, his voice hoarse and quiet.
"Hey,"
Beast boy frowned up at him,
"You know," he whispered, reaching for Robin's hand and tangling his fingers with Robin's, "Cyborg will start to notice the lack of sleep I'm getting,"
Robin chuckled and pressed a light kiss to Beast boy's lips.
"Does that mean you don't want me to come and see you anymore?"
"NO!" and Beast boy shot up, thinking Robin was being serious. However, moving so quickly tore at his wounds and Beast boy let out a loud yelp and fell forward into Robin's chest, trembling as pain racked his body. Robin immediately wrapped his arms tight around Beast boy, holding him in a safe embrace
"Shh, sorry,"
"Please don't…"
"I won't," and the short silence bored into both of their minds before Robin spoke again, "you know, we'll have to tell them sooner or later and I would prefer if it were sooner,"
Beast boy sighed, Robin was right. But they had to have some idea, after all, Raven and Cyborg knew that Beast boy loved Robin, everyone heard him say it too the dark-haired leader, even Starfire. What they didn't know was that Robin had a positive reaction to it. But again, they had to have some idea. The titans would have to know and the sooner they did, the better it would be, for the team. Best boy agreed to that point, but after that, he knew he wasn't ok with it. Telling them would be the best for the team, yes, but for him?
No, it would be the worst. Starfire would glow with hatred for him. Everyone knew that she loved Robin, and there was no way that she would blame this on Robin, he was too perfect, to much of the boy wonder.
So deep down, Beast boy felt a sinking feeling, a feeling that turned his stomach to shreds, turned his heart to stone and stopped his voice from speaking. There was no way he would tell Robin what he thought, not ever. Robin needed to count on him, and so far, that hadn't been happening really. He needed to let Robin know that the team was the most important thing, even more important then their relationship, their love. Because the city needed them.
Because the city needed Robin.
Curling tighter against Robin as the older male laid down with Beast boy in his arms, the changeling sighed to himself. He knew that this couldn't last, as long as Robin was the leader, the hero, and the famous one. As long as Robin held everything before him, this relationship would fall and crumble. Beast boy could feel it in his bones already, it was happening, the team was put first. And he got that, the team was always first priority, but Beast boy found himself being pushed past second and third as well.
Robin only came to see him at night, after the days work was done. Not just the crime fighting, but also the research and the updates that he sent to Gothem. And some nights, when Slade had attacked, Robin wouldn't come see him at all. And Best boy was left to wake up in the dead of night, feeling cold and forgotten. Would it have really mattered if he died? Sometimes, he really didn't know. The titans could defiantly get along with out him; they've proved that much.
"All right," Beast boy whispered, telling himself that he would be all right with this, but knowing that it was a lie. And that lie would tare him apart until nothing left of him was standing. He feared, that he still might die yet, just not in the same way as before.
Beast boy woke early the next day, alone. But, what else was he to expect? Robin would always leave the minute he fell asleep. But right now, Beast boy could care a less. Today was the day. The day that he was allowed to get the hell up and out of the medical room. He had found himself in the same room too many times for his liking. It was going to be a while before Beast boy let himself get that beat up again.
Swinging his legs to the floor Beast boy couldn't help but smile insanely wide. Finally, after two weeks of boredom, he could get up and do something. Infact, he was so happy that the small pinch of heartache left right away. He didn't have to wonder if Robin was going to come see him, he could see Robin whenever he wanted now.
First though, he was going to take a shower. A nice long, hot shower. And then after that, he was going to sit around in comfy lose cloths and eat all the freaking junk he wanted. Cyborg had refused to give him anything but healthy the whole two weeks, and Beast boy was going beyond insane without at least some amount of sugar. And as for the comfy cloths? Well, Robin and the others had made it quite clear that he was to not go on any missions until they say so, and that would not be anytime soon. So what's the point in lying around in tight fitting cloths when you aren't going to be doing anything?
Limping slightly, Beast boy slowly made his way to his room, he didn't want to tare anything and be sent back to stare at the ceiling all day. It felt good to just walk around the tower, his home. Even if it was dark and silent. Beast boy shivered, remembering the time when Raven's fears got lose and took everyone down with a monster from a movie. He was eerily reminded of that moment right then. However, the shelter of his door came into sight and Beast boy yelped happily. He missed his room so much, somewhere that he could hide in and be what the others thought he wasn't. A place that held all of his secrets and fears, and all of his lies.
He let out a sigh of relief as the cool air of his room swam around him and embraced him. Slipping off his tang-top, Beast boy headed to the small bathroom to the right. As much as he wanted to just sit and look at his room that he hadn't been in for at least a month, he still wanted a shower. He let out another sigh as the warm water hit his shoulders and rolled gracefully down his chest and stomach. Letting his head drop back, Beast boy smiled into the falling water, enjoying the fell of it caressing his eyelids, his cheek's, his lips. It was like a kiss…
From Robin.
Opening his eyes, Beast boy looked down at the ground, things, never really happened with Robin. Sure, they had their one time, and a few make out sessions here and there. But Robin and never told him that he loved him back. Fear gripped into the green boy's heart, was Robin just using him?
And suddenly, the shower seemed to over take him, wanting to drown him. His legs felt weak and his body shook. He knew that was most likely over reacting, but still.
He hoped not. He couldn't live without Robin, not now, not after he finally had him.
Beast boy's shower and depressing thoughts were put on hold though as a piecing scream erupted throughout the tower.
Starfire. It was always Starfire.
Beast boy jumped, hitting his head on the bar as he scrambled out of the shower. Jumping around his room, he pulled cloths on in a hurry and ran back out the door once again.
Rushing out the door, Beast boy slid to a stop minutes later in front of the main room, all Titans staring at him with bug eyes as the doors opened. And without a warning or an explanation, Beast boy found himself tackled to the ground by none other then Starfire.
"Beast boy! Do not worry us please!"
"What?" he was completely confused. Worry? He didn't do anything; he just went to take a shower. Looking up at the other titans Beast boy gave them a look of desperation to get Starfire off of him. Robin chuckled and pulled Starfire off of Beast boy.
Sitting up the changeling ran his fingers through his longer wet hair, pulling lightly at the end as he realized that the small tackle and sent his wounds aching. Though the aching feel was distracted Beast boy found himself lifted up and dropped onto the comfortable couch, fingers poking and prodding him. Looking up at Raven as Cyborg checked his wounds, Beast boy sighed again.
"You were supposed to wait until Cyborg checked your injuries before leaving the medical room, you know?" Raven said glancing over at Starfire and Robin, who was hugging the girl as she tried to calm herself. Ever since the battle and Beast boy's near death, the titans had taken it upon themselves to make sure that they knew where Beast boy was at all times, Starfire more then anyone. And every time he would disappear, she would send herself into a nervous wreck, thinking that he was taken away or died and the others didn't tell her or, well you get the point.
However, Robin was the one she went to for comfort and Robin never pushed her away. And the pain in Beast boy's heart was telling him that his jealousy was getting the better of him. He shouldn't doubt Robin like that; he knew that the boy wonder would never cheat on him…right?
Thinking this, Beast boy glanced over his shoulder and laid his eyes on Robin and Starfire. Starfire clutched tightly to Robin's slightly shorter forum, slowly getting over from the shock that Beast boy had disappeared so suddenly.
"Beast boy!" Raven said more harshly, trying to get the younger males attention. From the flinch that she received though, she knew she had gotten his attention the wrong way, but no matter, as long as he was listening. "Did you hear anything I asked you?"
Beast boy choose not to answer her and looked up at Cyborg as he stood.
"I'm good right?"
"Yeah BB, just don't do anything too rough ok"
"Sounds good to me,"
And just like that it was over. Raven stalked away to her room, upset that she was interrupted in her books, Cyborg went straight for the kitchen that was a mere 5 feet away and Starfire finally let go of Robin, though the two of them went off to do some sort of research.
"or something else," Beast boy whispered to himself.
"Ya say something BB?" Cyborg asked and Beast boy jumped. Stuttering, Beast boy shook his head,
"N-no."
He would have to make sure that he stopped talking to himself out loud.
After breakfast, which Beast boy complained about the meat that Cyborg was eating, the group got called away on a bank robbery, nothing major. Yet, they had been gone for a long time and Beast boy had found himself alone in the large tower.
He had played video games, watched his favorite shows, listened to half of his CD's, played around on the computer in Cyborg's room, re-bandaged his wounds, eaten an early dinner and even read a book that he snuck out of Raven's room. The titans were still not back and the day was quickly turning into evening, the sun lowering in the blue sky.
Beast boy sighed and stood from the couch, carefully placing Raven's book on the seat. He climbed up on the foot wide ledge and looked out the great glass windows that showed the city on the right and the ocean on the left, both running for as long as the eye could see. The sun reflected off the millions of windows and the ocean waves, the sky turning dark were the sun was farthest from.
It was beautiful and Beast boy felt an odd wave of emotion float through him. The memory of watching the sunsets on the beach with his mother before she died. The heartache when his fathers voice floated through his mind, bidding him a goodnight. He felt happy and at peace, yet sad at the same time. He wondered if things would still be the same if his parents had died.
He wondered if he would turn out to be who he was today, who ever that was. Beast boy didn't know anyway, he was losing himself again, like he always did every couple of years. And he always found himself changing, but when would it stop? When would he knew that he was really himself, someone he was comfortable with, someone that he knew would allow him to be happy with himself. Beast boy just couldn't ever image that, at least, nowhere in the near future.
If only he hadn't gotten sick back then…if he had been more careful. He could still have his creamy smooth skin and dark brown hair and bright hazel eyes, if only he hadn't gotten sick back in Africa. But he did and the mutation was now a part of him forever, no matter how much he hated it. All though, he didn't always hate it, just times like this, when he was alone and stared at his reflection.
He often wondered why the disease had infected him in the first place, it was only known in animals, how come he was infected, why him?
Beast boy sighed and turned away from the window, he needed to keep his mind off the past. There was no way he could find the person he was if he dwelled on the past too much.
"Hey,"
And Beast boy fell down from the ledge and onto the floor with a dull ache all over his body. Robin's shadow fell over him, his hair wet and hanging around his face, his cloths torn and a nicely cut scratch ran across his left cheek. Beast boy frowned; he thought that it was just a bank robbery.
Taking the offered hand from Robin, Beast boy stood, ready with a question.
"What happened? I thought it was just a bank robbery?"
" It was, but Ruby was the one who did it,"
Beast boy froze at the name, that's right, Ruby hadn't died. They had left her sitting in the cold dark gothic building, crying over her fallen husband's body. They would have to get her in jail as soon as possible, but it didn't seem like that would be too hard. After all, she was really the only threatening villain left in Jump City. After the Brother Hood of Evil was defeated, all the villains that the brain and brought together was still frozen back in the middle of nowhere.
"Is everyone else alright?"
"Starfire is pretty banged up, I'm worried about her. Usually she doesn't get hurt that bad,"
Beast boy pulled away from Robin's arms that had wrapped around him earlier and sighed sadly.
"You should go help Cyborg with her then, if he's injured as well,"
And Robin gave Beast a strange look of confusion, but didn't get to voice it as Beast boy continued.
"Besides, she'll be happy if you are there and you need to get patched up too, that looks like it needs stitches," Beast boy mentioned the cut on Robin's face and then the changeling just pasted Robin, heading out to go to his room.
It left Robin cold and alone in the dark room. Something with Beast boy was off; the boy was being so…different. It was something that Robin couldn't place, but he didn't like it. Sighing, the leader of the titans group headed down to the medical lab. Beast boy was right; he was going to need stitches.
As he wandered into the room, Robin heard Raven arguing with Cyborg loudly.
"If you were paying attention then we wouldn't be this banged up,"
"Me? Raven, you are the one who threw the desk on me,"
"You got in the way, I didn't aim it at you because I wanted too, I was trying to hit her,"
Robin sighed and tuned them out, reaching for the bandages, he didn't really feel like dealing with his team mates right now, all he wanted was to cuddle with his younger green lover and maybe get some food sometime this evening.
And he was in and out without even talking to the others, just getting weird glances as he walked around the room, gathering what he needed.
He patched his arm up the best he could as he walked down the dim hallways toward Beast boy's room. He wasn't going to give up that easily, he was going to find out what was bothering him, no matter what it took.
The soft glow under Beast boy's door told Robin that the younger male hadn't gone to sleep. Smiling, Robin knocked on the door as he bit at the bandage wrapping, tearing it off so he could tape it down. And he was doing so as Beast boy opened the door.
"Er, what are you doing?"
"Dressing myself,"
"Uh…Robin," Beast boy stared; he was at a loss for words. Why Robin was here, dressing his wounds and not having Cyborg do it was beyond him. And he should be with Starfire anyway; the girl was probably worried sick.
"Well, come on, let me in," and Robin pushed past Beast boy, tearing bandage tape with his teeth once again. Beast boy reached up and grabbed Robin's arm and the small tape that he had ripped.
"You shouldn't be doing this yourself, dude. You could mess it up,"
"Thanks, I'm glad I know now that I can't take care of myself," Robin said playfully, but Beast boy wasn't in the mood.
"Fine whatever," and he taped up the bandage and dropped Robin's arm quickly. Robin frowned. Usually Beast boy wouldn't get mad; there was defiantly something wrong now. Robin sighed, perhaps now wasn't the best time to tell Beast boy that the others knew about hem, but he was going to anyway. Robin was always one to beat around the bush.
"I told them,"
"What?"
"About us, I told them this morning, before Starfire went to go check on you,"
Beast boy turned and glared up at Robin,
"I thought we were going to tell them together,"
"Yes, but I thought this was better," and Robin wrapped his arms around Beast boy, holding him close, " I could see it in your eyes when we talked about it, that you were uncomfortable with telling them,"
And Beast boy melted. He couldn't be mad at Robin for trying to help him. For thinking about him and what it would be like, the awkwardness.
"Robin…" and Beast boy gently took Robin's hand and led him over to his bed, gently pushing him down to sit. Grabbing the wrapping in Robin's hands, Beast boy pushed aside the dark hair to see the clean cut more clearly on Robin's face.
"You know, I can do that myself,"
"Yeah and screw up your face, I don't think so man,"
Robin smirked as Beast boy carefully touched the open wound, afraid that Robin would lash out in pain. Robin, though, didn't, but reached out and drew Beast boy close, placing feather-light kisses on the boy's exposed neck and shoulder. Beast boy frowned; it wasn't easy stitching Robin up like this, especially when the older teen was doing things like that.
"R-Robin, stop it, I'm trying to do this right,"
Sometimes Beast boy wondered if Robin really was as mature as he acted, because right now, he wasn't. The younger changeling let out a yelp as he felt Robin's rough hands slip around his waist and grab his ass, pulling the boy even closer.
" I thought you were tired?" Beast boy frowned, but contained to finish up on Robin's stitches.
"I am," Robin whispered, his lips hovering over Beast boy's belly button, his soft creamy green skin showing.
"Grr, then stop that," and Beast boy gave Robin's wound a light hit as the older male slipped his hands around his inner thighs, keeping Beast boy's legs spread slightly.
Robin though ignored the slight sting and slowly inched his hands upward, making Beast boy cry out in shock. The older leader wasn't planning on doing anything, but that didn't mean he couldn't tease Beast boy for a bit.
Pulling Beast boy even closer, Robin smirked and licked his lips, looking up at Beast boy with his blue eyes full of lust. Or you know, maybe he wouldn't just tease Beast boy.
"You know," Robin whispered, moving his hands to slid up Beast by's shirt, "I'll be careful,"
And Robin didn't expect the reaction that he got. Beast boy growled the second those words left Robin's mouth and the younger male pushed away. Stepping back into the shadows, pain in his eyes, his body shaking. Robin frowned and stood, stepping toward the shaking boy.
"Beast boy wha-"
"Is that all you want?" Beast boy cut him off, his voice small and quiet. He held his head down, keeping Robin from seeing the tears in his eyes, "is sex all you want?"
"What gave you that idea?"
"Its ok…I guess, I mean, everyone needs some sort of release right?"
How suddenly things went downhill, Robin had no idea and the pain in his chest told him to fix things as Beast boy's eyes filled with tears.
"No, Beast boy,"
"No really, I get it. The city needs you, the team does, and Starfire does. And well, lets face it, I'm not everyone's favorite person, but I love you and…" Beast boy wiped at the tears in his eyes and swallowed, " even though I'll never be first in your eyes, or even something, I still love you,"
And Robin's pain went from his chest throughout his entire body, raging his bones and muscles on fire. He did this, did this to the person he cared about the most, the person he loved. He hadn't shown just how much he needed Beast boy, how much he cared. Beast boy was right, about one thing at least, Robin had been putting everything before him. The missions, the city, the villains, his research, even the other titans.
And knowing from experience, from seeing it happen to someone else, Robin knew that it was time to put a stop to it. He had seen Bruce fall apart from relationships because of his heroic hobbies. Because he had spent more time on playing the hero then being a good partner. And Robin had vowed that he wouldn't do that, and yet, he had.
What had he done? How could he just ignore it? Ignored Beast boy?
"No, Beast boy,"
"Really, it's ok…" and Beast boy stepped back into the shadows even farther, toward the door. Tears were streaming down his face, his green eyes full of pain and yet an understanding that was false.
And just like that, Beast boy was gone; he fled his own room, whispering quietly as the door closed,
"Feel better…"
After that Beast boy avoided Robin for days. And the days turned into weeks and the weeks into months. Beast boy healed from his wounds and started missions again. Though, it took sometime for the youngest member of the titans to regain his strength. With so much time out from crime fighting, he had lost his stamina and strength. He had to retrain and push himself hard for the first couple of weeks.
The other titans noticed the change in both Robin and Beast boy. Both of them distant and quiet. Robin with drew into his research and missions even more. Beast boy grew quiet and didn't bother whining about losing video games. He didn't even make a comment on food when Cyborg cooked meat in front of him.
And every night Beast boy would let his tears fall and wish that Robin would come and hold him, kiss him, and let him that everything was alright. And at that same time, Robin would sit awake, staring at the white wall across form his bed, willing himself to go to Beast boy, but in the end, fail for fear of messing up.
And that's how things went for a long time. It was the same even as the nights grew longer; the weather colder and soon winter was upon the titans. It was a week before Christmas when the first snowfall came and as kids got out for Christmas break, it seemed that the villains also took off for Christmas.
It was also when Robin had gotten to the point of breaking. But he wasn't going to, infact; he wasn't going to let this happen any longer. Even if he had to knock Beast boy out and tie him to a chair, Robin was going to get the youngest titan back, no matter what.
So, on the 20th, Robin spent the whole day in the city, by himself, Christmas shopping. And he mainly went out for Beast boy, but it was also a good time to look for everyone else in the tower. This was the first Christmas that Starfire actually fully understood the meaning and the titans decided to actually celebrate it more then they usually did, like when they were with their parents, before they ever became titans.
With five days till the joyous holiday, the other titans tried as hard as they could to put a smile back on Beast boy's face. They dragged him out to help decorate the tower. Pushed him out into the snow to have snow fights and make snow angels and snowmen. They shoved gallons of hot coco into his slender hands and blasted Christmas music so loud that the city could here it loud and clear.
And even though Beast boy's spirits did seem to lighten a bit, he still wasn't well…Beast boy. Although things seemed a bit better between him and Robin. They no longer were quiet around eachother. And they could have a good time in each other's presence, but there was always that awkward feeling hanging in the air when everyone was silent.
The titans deiced to decorate the tree on Christmas Eve, when the city was glowing in the night and the crisp air was still. And as it became closer to the 24th, the titans became even more excited, even Raven.
On the 23rd, Beast boy had disappeared from the tower altogether, just gone. And Robin feared that he had left the team. But his arrival at 9 pm eased his worries. Starfire and Cyborg though had surrounded him the minute he got in, asking where he had been and what he had bought. Of course, the asked what he had bought more often. Almost adults the titans may have been, but they still loved to get Christmas presents, after all, they were still teenagers. Beast boy though only shook his head and smirked, saying they would have to wait until Christmas morning. And with that, he headed to bed, wishing everyone sweet dreams, even Robin.
Robin woke the next morning to the crisp chill of newly fallen snow. That feeling of excitement, the calming silence of the sparkling, untouched blanket of white. And of course, the joy of Christmas Eve. And even though the floor was cold to his touch, Robin wondered down to the main room happily, dressed in his black sweat pants and long-sleeved shirt. He had considered putting his mask on, but Beast boy's gentle voice telling him good night just hours before kept him from even reaching for it.
Today was the day that Robin was going to get Beast boy back. Only, he had to figure out when was the perfect time. Yawning widely, Robin ran his hand through his un-jelled hair, only to have it fall back in front of his face, perhaps it was time for a hair cut.
The dark haired male couldn't help another yawn as he walked into the main room; food floating it's way to his nose. Though, the surprise was who was cooking. Beast boy stood over the stove clad only in dark red sweat pants and fuzzy white slippers. Robin frowned; it was awfully cold to be walking around without a shirt on. So, before heading over to the kitchen area, Robin checked to see it the heat was on. Finding that it wasn't, Robin quietly clicked it on.
Beast boy's ears twitched at the sound and he glanced over his shoulder, only to blush and look back at the food cooking in front of him. He heard Robin walk closer and soon he felt the older male's body heat on his back.
"Hey," Robin whispered, his voice low and husky. Beast boy blushed and shyly glanced back at Robin.
"Hi…"
"Aren't you cold?"
"A little…"
"I turned on the heat,"
"Thank you," Beast boy whispered, fearing that if he talked any louder, Robin would leave. It was quiet after that though and Beast boy felt tears in his eyes as he thought Robin had left.
"Don't cry,"
And Beast boy jumped, letting out a small yelp. Robin had moved next to him, bending down to check what was inside the oven. When he stood back up though, he had noticed the tears lingering in the younger boy's eyes. Frowning, Robin reached out and whipped a tear away,
"Please, don't cry…Gar,"
Beast boy stood still, his body shaking as the tears fell. Maybe…he had been wrong, and Robin really did care? Glancing up at Robin, Beast boy gave him a small smile. It wasn't very convincing though with tears running down his face.
"Aw, shit," and Robin grabbed Beast boy, pulling him against his chest, holding him tight. The minute Beast boy hit Robin, he clutched tightly to his clothed chest, fighting his tears from falling.
"You didn't have to make breakfast you know," Robin said after awhile. He hadn't expected to see a real ham cooking in the oven; Beast boy must be dying here. The only thing that Beast boy hated worse then eating meat was cooking it, but here he was cooking for the rest of them on Christmas Eve. And not only that but eggs and hash browns as well. And he was cooking for five of them, one of which could eat the entire breakfast himself.
"I-I know," Beast boy whispered, tucking his head into Robin's shoulder, embarrassed, "I wanted too…it's Christmas…sort of…."
Robin laughed and patted Best boy's head, running his fingers through the longer strains. The younger titan had let it grow out again and was now hanging nicely around his ears, and eyes. It was untidy, like Robins, but shone with thickness and health altogether. He missed this, just holding Beast boy, how could he have ever made such a mistake?
"You know, Beast boy," Robin started, pulling away a little so he could look at Beast boy's face, "I've missed this, missed us,"
And the hopeful look in Beast boy's face nearly broke Robin's heart.
"Really?"
"Really, I'm sorry I wasn't a good boyfriend, but if you want we could try again you know?" and Robin leaned down and bumped Beast boy's nose with his.
"I-I do…want to try again,"
Robin smiled and hugged Beast boy tight, there was no way in hell he was going to mess it up this time.
"Gar…I know I never told you this but I lov-"
"Good morning!" but Robin's words were caught in his throat as Starfire and Cyborg burst into the main room, smiling happily, giggling, and jumping around. Beast boy and Robin parted fast but both boys gave eachother a gentle look of understanding before greeting their teammates.
"Morning guys!" Beast boy said, his mood suddenly changing very quickly and after all, whose wouldn't? Not after what Robin had said, well almost said. Odd, how you could spend forever apart from someone but just one moment would bring you back together, all fights and hurt forgotten.
"Good morning Friend! Did you sleep well?"
And Beast boy glanced at Robin before answering Starfire, "yeah, I slept great,"
"Well that's all good and stuff, but I smell breakfast, now where is it?" Cyborg demanded, smiling widely as he sat down behind the small island counter top, smacking his fist down onto it.
"Sure sure, just keep your stomach in will ya," Beast boy said, turning off the stove and moving to get plates. "Robin, could you get the ham out?"
Robin smiled at Beast boy and did as he asked, placing the ham on the counter next to the stove,
"Want me to cut it too?"
"Yes please," Beast boy replied, shoving food onto plates for each titan. Meanwhile, Starfire floated slightly between Robin and Beast boy, confused.
"Beast boy,"
"Hmm?"
"You cooked the meat?"
"Yes,"
"I thought you are the vegetarian,"
"I am, just because I don't eat it doesn't mean I can't cooking it for my friends,"
"Oh," Starfire said, watching Robin as he cut the meat.
Cyborg laughed and brought Beast boy into a headlock as he placed a plate down in front of him.
"Thanks man, you don't know how much this means too me!"
"Aw, cut it out Dude!" and Beast boy tired to pull away from Cyborg's grip, but only got himself trapped even more. It felt good, being truly happy for the first time in awhile and Beast boy was glad that he didn't have to watch his friends try to cheer him up. It was Christmas Eve and that was no way to spend a holiday.
Finally getting free form his prison, Beast boy gasped for breath and glanced around, "Where's Raven?"
"I think she's still sleeping." Cyborg answered, drooling over the ham that Robin place onto the counter top, in front of him.
"Well then no one's eating until she wakes up," Robin said, smirking as Cyborg's face fell, the oldest titan would have to wait for his ham.
"Yes! We shall wait till Raven awakes from sleep! It would be rude not to Cyborg."
"Yeah, I'm waitin'" Cyborg growled at Starfire and half-heartily threw balled up napkin at her. She "eeped" and floated out of the way, laughing.
"Well you don't have to wait very long," Raven's monotone voice floated into the warm main room and Cyborg's grin was back.
"Hell yeah!" and Cyborg was in heaven.
As the titans began their meal, Beast boy smiled and sat quietly, only eating the eggs and hash browns. He was glad that things were starting to turn around, even though it happened quiet fast.
When the food was almost completely gone and everyone could barely eat anymore, Cyborg stood abruptly and gathered everyone's plate and dumped them into the sink.
"Who wants to go tree hunting!" he shouted, it was more of a statement rather then a question. Even if someone didn't want to go out in the crisp cold air and white snow, they would make them.
"Argh, in the cold?" Raven asked.
"What's with you? You don't like the heat, you don't like the cold…what do you like?" Beast boy asked, hands on his hips and on his toes, looking up at Raven.
"For you to not walk around in white fuzzy slippers,"
And the tower was full of laughter as Beast boy blushed from head to toe.
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By the time the titans got back onto the road it was around 5:30 and the sky was quickly filling with snow clouds. With a large Christmas tree hanging on top of the car, the five teens laid back in the car to rest, listening to Cyborg's music system play Christmas music. Starfire sat in front watching the top of the tree hit the car window shield with great amusement. Raven sat in back, behind Cyborg, talking to him when he wasn't freaking out about his car getting scratched by the tree.
And Robin and Beast boy sat next to Raven in the back, curled close together. When they had gone looking for a tree, it had taken three hours just to get out of the city and another hour to get to the tree farm. So, needless to say, Beast boy had a lot of pent up energy by the time they got there and gone running off the second the car had stopped.
And so the titans spent their day looking for the perfect tree and keeping Beast boy from falling into any large, snow-covered holes. Well, actually, it was more like Robin and Raven were looking out for Beast boy while Cyborg and Starfire looked for the tree.
Although they got the tree, they didn't seem to keep Beast boy from trouble. He had infact fallen into an unseen hole and had grabbed onto Robin to keep himself from falling, only, he ended up pulling the older boy in with him. So, by the time Cyborg and Starfire found Raven, Robin and Beast boy, all three of them were soaked with melted snow and their cheeks pink form the cold and both Robin and Beast boy with new cuts and scratches.
But now, as the sky darkened and the city lights came into view, both Robin and Beast boy were fast asleep, cuddled close to eachother. Infact, Raven had so much room in the back because Beast boy had somehow climbed halfway into Robin's lap and fell asleep with his face buried in Robin's shoulder.
"Shall we turn down the music? I do not wish to wake them," Starfire whispered as she glanced back at Robin and Beast boy though the rearview mirror. Raven's small smile met Starfire's gaze and Raven shook her head,
"I don't think so, the music was what put them to sleep. If anything, I would turn it up louder,"
Starfire giggled and gave the two boys a quick glance before turning her eyes back to the road in front of her.
"Yeah, leave them alone. It's nice that they are finally getting along,"
"Even though they got a little too friendly really fast," Rave pointed out as Cyborg gave a conspicuous look.
"I don't know, I mean Robin did tell us that they were together in that way,"
"Yes! Is it not wonderful? They are very cute together yes?"
"Uh," and Raven gave them a quick glance. Starfire was right, they sure were cute together. "Sure," not that she would let anyone know that she also thought that as well.
"Well, whatever happened, I'm glad its over. Living with them for the past couple months has been torture," Cyborg pointed out and the two girls nodded in agreement.
"Yeah, but now it's going to be a different kind of torture," Raven stated, looking out the window at the large snowflakes that started to fall. Cyborg groaned, he hadn't thought about that apparently. Starfire on the other hand giggled and smiled brightly.
"Great," Cyborg muttered, tightening his hands on the wheel.
"Wonderful!" and Starfire stared at the rearview mirror, willing Beast boy and Robin to wake up and start making out right then and there.
"Not going to happen Star," Raven said, crushing all of Starfire's hopes and dreams. Originally, she had been disappointed when Robin announced that him and Beast boy were together, but the disappointment went away rather quickly. And soon, Starfire found herself hoping to catch them together making out in the hallway, the kitchen, or even the work out room! This was no different. They still had three more hours to get back to the tower and that was three hours of a chance to see them make out, even though they were dead to the world right now.
And the car ride home went a lot like that. Robin and Beast boy snuggled close and sleeping, suffering from minor scratches and cuts from tree branches. Raven dosing every once in awhile and chatting with Cyborg and Starfire. And Starfire gazing longingly into the rearview mirror, hoping for the two lover boys to awake and suddenly be so very horny. And Cyborg, well, poor Cyborg just tried to ignore her the whole time and kept his concentration on the road and whatever Raven said when she spoke.
By the time they arrived at the tower, it was dark and a whole new wave of snow had fallen and still was sparkling clean and untouched. Starfire and Cyborg got the tree off the car and into the tower as Raven woke Robin and Beast boy, well more like Robin. Beast boy had just mumbled something and cuddled closer to Robin. So, seeing that Beast boy wouldn't wake up, Robin just carried him in, close behind the others, watching with amusement as Starfire had no difficulty bringing the large tree in by herself.
And threw all the laughing, giggling and crashing into things, Beast boy slept on, safe in Robin's arms. It wasn't until Cyborg and Raven got the tree up in it's stand and Starfire brought down all the boxes of ornaments and the rest of the Christmas decorations that they hadn't put up did Beast boy start to stir. The quiet murmur of the titans talking and shoveling around in the boxes for ornaments brought Beast boy to open his eyes sleepily.
He woke in the main room, curled comfortably on the large half circle, black couch to see Starfire floating happily around the tree, placing lights around the branches at the top. Raven sat on the floor covered in packaging foam with an annoyed look on her face, and Cyborg finished twisting the lights around the tree at the bottom. But Robin was nowhere in sight. Frowning, Beast boy sat up and the warm blanket that had been covering him fell off to a heap around his waist.
"Oh! Beast boy, you are awake!" Starfire smiled from behind the tree, Christmas lights tangles all over and around her.
"Uh, Star, the lights go on the tree, you do know that right?"
"Yes Beast boy!"
"Um, alright," Beast boy said, watching as Starfire floated happily in circles, tangling herself even more in the wires. It seemed though, that Starfire didn't notice this and by the time she finished, Raven would have to help her untangle herself. His worries though left as a steaming mug of hot coco was placed in front of his face.
"Here," Robin's voice said quietly, sitting down next to the still sleepy shape-shifter. Beast boy smiled and took the mug, enjoying the warmth that it sent through his body. He went back to watching Raven, Starfire, and Cyborg decorate the tree, waking up completely. His ears twitched at the soft tone of a women's voice reaching a high note in the background. Christmas music, so much of it was the same and yet it never seemed to get old. No matter how many times you've heard it being re-song by different singers.
"How's your arm?" Robin asked peering at Beast boy from over his cup, his eyes once again hidden under the trademark mask. Beast boy gave Robin a little smile and wished that he hadn't put the mask back on.
"A little sore, but good, sorry bout dragging you down with me,"
But Robin shook his head and reached out, stroking Beast boy's cheek with his bare hands, gloves gone somewhere. Beast boy blushed as Starfire gushed and squealed from behind the tree. Robin though ignored her and probably had rolled his eyes, but Beast boy couldn't tell.
"Something came up?" Beast boy asked as he noted Robin's uniform was on. Robin nodded and through a small disk at Beast boy, who caught it with difficulty. He didn't want to spill his coco.
"Ruby showed up at the town square, baring a gift. Surprisingly though, we got her pretty quickly and she's locked up in a jail cell somewhere right now. I thought it was going to be a lot harder then that to get her put away."
Beast boy's ears dropped a bit as he remembered memories from the past. He flipped the disk around to look at the back. It was the disk that Ruby always had on the front of her belt; Nicolas had given it to her to help control the powers that she mutated into.
"That's good, sorry I was sleeping…"
"That's ok, you still need to catch up on your sleep."
"Yeah, but…I haven't been part of the team lately,"
"Don't sweat it ok?" and Robin scooted closer, bringing Beast boy close to him. The younger male snuggled close, resting his head comfortably on Robin's chest, curled around the teen's body, keeping his mug of coco close to his chest. Robin smiled and ran his fingers threw Beast boys' soft, thick hair with the arm that was around the changeling's shoulders.
They stayed like that for a bit until Starfire's constant glancing and giggling annoyed both Robin and Beast boy.
"I'm taking a shower, be down in a bit, don't start the fun without me," Robin said, untangling himself from Beast boy, giving the shape-shifter a quick kiss on the temple before heading out.
And then Starfire was all over Beast boy. He had nowhere to run, he was trapped.
"Friend! Please, do share,"
"Er…a-about what?" Beast boy asked, sinking into the couch as far as possible as Starfire was quickly closing the gap between his personal space and hers.
"Yeah, please, share your love life with us," Raven said, her voice dripping with sarcasm, from the floor, now sorting the boxes of ornaments that were out and spread all over the floor. Cyborg gave Raven a look of pure horror.
"T-there's nothing to tell." Beast boy squeaked, looking around Starfire at Cyborg for help.
"Hey, man, don't look at me. I'm not getting in the way of Star,"
And Beast boy whimpered, god did he wish for Robin to hurry the hell up.
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Robin walked smoothly into the main room, his hair wet and hanging around his face, his uniform tucked nicely away and replaced with his black pajama pants and a black long sleeved button down shirt that wasn't all the way buttoned up. His mask was sitting comfortably on his dresser; waiting to be placed back over his eyes, but would be waiting for a long time. Robin didn't plan on going out on any missions any time soon.
However, he may have a mission in the tower itself. As the doors shut close behind him, Robin wondered why he left Beast boy alone in the room the Starfire. She had been giving them excited looks and giggling all day, it wasn't safe around her, not alone.
And Beast boy had fallen into her web. She was currently chatting at the speed of light as Beast boy took out what looked like to be a fourth batch of Christmas cookies. The poor teen had his ears dropped and was flinching every time Starfire would take a deep breath to start talking again.
Robin couldn't understand half of what she was saying, but he got the hint for his name was mentioned a lot along with boyfriend and going out. And a lot of the talking seemed to be questions, but Starfire was going so fast that all Beast boy could do was stare at her with a frightened look in his bright green eyes.
Robin sighed and calming headed for the small kitchen area, keeping an eye on Raven and Cyborg, who were in the middle of trying to untangle the tinsel that Starfire had apparently blasted apart earlier. Coming up behind Starfire, Robin cleared his throat and smiled at the relief that washed over Beast boy's face.
"Excuse me Starfire," and Robin pushed past her, wrapping his arms around Beast boy's thin waist and pulling him close, nibbling on a green pointed ear. Beast boy smiled and encircled his arms around Robin's neck, purring as he leaded into Robin.
Starfire squealed again and spun in circles, giggling.
"Star, maybe you should sit down for awhile,"
"Yeah, you're giving yourself a blood rush," Raven agreed with Cyborg and levitated Starfire over to the couch and dropped her onto the soft cushions. And with some pouting and a last giggle, Starfire agreed to calm down.
And that started the whole adventure of decorating the Christmas tree. With the lights and tinsel up and sparkling, the only thing left was the ornaments. So, the titans gathered around the tree and went to work. It took longer then expected, but that was perhaps because Cyborg, Robin and Beast boy had started a cookie fight with the cookie's Beast boy had made early. And after that, Starfire wouldn't let them continue decorating without more cookies to be baked for 'Santa Clause.' And no matter how much they tried to tell her that he wasn't real, Starfire just wouldn't believe it. So in the end, Raven and Cyborg worked together to make four more batches of cookies while Starfire, Beast boy and Robin finished up the tree.
And just when they thought they were almost done, Silky had decided to eat half the Christmas lights hanging on the tree. With great difficulty and many mishaps, Cyborg managed to put on the extra lights without removing any tinsel or ornaments, with Raven's help of course.
It was around 10:30 when the tree was finally done and the titans all lay around on the floor in a heap, ready for sleep. So, with Raven the first to bid everyone a good night and a merry Christmas, the others began to get back up and clean. Starfire hurriedly stuffed al the packaging foam back in the boxes and was soon flying to her room at top speed, excited for tomorrow morning. Cyborg checked the lighting systems and the defense systems as well. He didn't want anyone to ruin their Christmas and Christmas Eve. So the oldest titan wished Beast boy and Robin sweet dreams with a huge yawn and a roll of his eyes.
By the time the kitchen was cleaned up and the cookies put away for tomorrow, it was 11:45 and another new wave of snow was falling on the ground. The Christmas tree stood tall and glowing warmly, reflecting off the large windows that over looked the city that sparkled with lights and snow in the night. Robin glanced around for Beast boy as he finished putting away the clean dishes and he found his little lover curled up on the couch, holding something in his hands.
Quietly, Robin headed over; making sure that Beast boy wasn't asleep before speaking,
"Hey, you should head up, it's getting late,"
"Shouldn't you be going to bed too?"
Robin smirked and slid down next to Beast boy, pulling the boy into his lap and nuzzling his cheek. Beast boy blushed and leaded away form Robin, embarrassed.
"Robin?"
"Hmm?"
"I…I'm sorry,"
Robin gave him a confused look, his blue eyes shinning brightly in the glow of the Christmas tree, "What for?"
"For everything. I've been so off lately, and with Ruby and Nicolas and…" Beast boy looked up at Robin, tears lingering in his eyes. He couldn't believe that Robin had taken him back so fast. Especially when he himself had been wrong. Wrong that Robin didn't care, wrong that Robin put everything before him.
"Don't be, everyone gets a little out of character every now and then," Robin whispered, playing with Beast boy's hair that hung over his ears.
"I'm sorry I didn't trust you…before, I…I didn't want us to stop…I just,"
"It's ok, I know. You don't have to be sorry, everything's good now,"
"Yeah," and Beast boy laid his head down on Robin's chest. Both Robin and Beast boy stayed quiet for a bit, enjoying each other's touch and embrace. Robin though kept wondering what the box in Beast boy's hands was.
"What's that?" he asked and he felt Best boy jump at his voice. Robin chuckled and rubbed the back of Best boy's neck, calming him. Blushing Beast boy sat up so he could see Robin better and handed him the box,
"I-it's for you,"
"It's not Christmas yet," Robin said, looking at the clock that read 11:55.
"That's ok, I want you to open it now,"
Robin raised a dark eyebrow at Beast boy and tore a little at the wrapping paper,
"You're so corny you know," he said and Beast boy blushed, ducking his head a little.
Robin smiled and finished unwrapping the gift. Though the smile disappeared as a photograph stared back at him. His parents smiling at the camera, with Robin on his Dad's shoulders, barely older then the age of five. Under neither the photo laid a book that Robin recognized. His father used to read him a child version of it when he was little. It was something that Robin always remembered about his father. His father said that Robin could read the real thing when he was older; he was too young to understand half the book back then. But Robin never got the chance to read it because his parent's death and he just, forgot, locked it away with the pain.
Looking up with watered eyes Robin leaned his temple against Beast boy's, an unsure emotion swirling in the changeling's green eyes.
"Where?"
"I-I…called in a favor,"
"Really?"
"Yeah, in Gothem,"
Robin smiled and pressed, a little rushed into Beast boy, kissing the younger male's lips for the first time in months. Beast boy, a little shaky, reached up with trembling hands and slid them into Robin's un-spiked hair. Robin made a small sound and slipped his tongue past Beast boy's lips, pushing against Beast boy's smaller frame until Beast boy fell onto his back, Robin on top of him.
Robin's tears had leaked through his closed eyelids and streamed down his face. His hands clutched tightly to Beast boy's face, holding his jaw firmly. He kissed him hard and sweet and passionate and gentle all at once. Tasting Beast boy, running his tongue along Beast boy's teeth, chuckling at the feel of the changeling's small fangs. He swirled his tongue with Beast boy's battling him to win dominance.
Robin hadn't felt this good in months, he missed Beast boy's warm touch, the boy's trembling body. The way he would make him feel so hot and cold at the same time. The way his mouth drove him wild. His warm, hot tongue brushing against his tenderly, timid most times. The way Beast boy would whimper when he left marks on his neck and shoulders. His loud moans when things got farther then Beast boy had expected.
It was the first time in a long time that Robin felt at home, that he felt safe, that he felt loved. The first time in a very long time, since his parents died. Robin felt, at peace.
With the need for air, Robin pulled back slightly, breathing deep and smiled at Beast boy who was trembling and flushed under him. Sliding his hands up to brush Beast boy's hair from his temple. Robin leaned down and placed a tender, short kiss on Beast boy's lips,
"Thank you,"
Beast boy smiled and let his slender hands fall out of Robin's dark locks and enclose around his leader's neck. Pulling himself up off the couch and pressed against Robin, Beast boy nuzzled Robin's face,
"I love you,"
It was quiet in the warm, glowing main room. The crisp feeling of holidays, winter and snow hung in the air. The warm sent of cinnamon and sugar floated around and the soft melodies in the background soothed their ears. And even though Beast boy's whisper had been quiet, Robin still heard him.
"I love you too," he whispered and brushed his lips against Beast boy's. The boy below him sighed happily and intertwined his legs with Robin's as the clock rang out that midnight was now upon them.
"Merry Christmas," Beast boy whispered, his eyes glancing quickly to Robin's lips and then back up to his blue eyes.
Chuckling Robin pressed his lips against Beast boy's and murmured,
"Merry Christmas BB,"
And for the both of them, it was the end of their bleeding sacrifice's and the start of a new beginning.
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OWARI!
Oh, sadness,I'm going to miss working on this story so much! Please tell me what you think and I thank you so very much for reading. I might do a sequal to this story, if you think it is a good idea, please let me know! I am more then willing to if you guys want one!
THANKS!
and once agian, please review... :)