DISCLAIMER: I DO NOT OWN ANYTHING.

CHAPTER TEN

I laid in bed for a few hours, thinking and watching her sleep. What had I just done? I should have just let her leave. But then what? Would we have talked after that? Would I have ever seen her again? Could I live with that?

I sighed. Absolutely not. I had come to depend on my almost nightly talks with her. But now what? The truth was basically out and she had lied to me. She knew exactly who I was. She had to by checking her messages.

I rolled out of bed, trying not to disturb her as I moved. I picked up all the blankets off the floor and covered her up, taking one more good look at her beautiful face.

I decided to go out for a breath of air. No one would be out this time of night, so it should be pretty safe for me to be out without getting hounded by anyone. I wrote a quick note to her in case she woke while I was gone.

Had some stuff to do. Be back soon.

I grabbed my room key and walked out. Why did things have to get so complicated? Why did we have to meet? It was so much simpler when we were just two anonymous people who didn't really know much about each other, but talked anyway.

I walked the streets for about an hour, only passing about ten people within that time. I took the time to clear my head before heading back up to the room. I knew that the situation up there couldn't be avoided. Morning wasn't going to be pretty.

I was sitting on the couch when she came out of the bedroom, looking refreshed and even more beautiful.

"You found everything okay?" She jumped and turned around as she heard my voice, alarm present in her features.

"Yes, thank you." Her voice appeared to have returned to normal, and I could clearly hear Not Telling's voice coming from her.

"Who brought my things?" she asked.

"If I'm not mistaken, I believe it was the Poor Disabled Indian Girl," I said, waiting to see just how much information she was going to be willing to divulge now.

She walked over and sat on the couch across from me, keeping eye contact with me the entire time. She appeared to be trying to judge my reaction to that information, but I wasn't willing to give it up freely. She was going to have to work for it this time.

"Nothing to say? I think that's a first," I said, my words harsh and cold. "You couldn't even come up with a better bullshit middle name? Elizabeth? Fucking…Elizabeth? Really? That was harsh, even for you." Her eyes closed briefly. How dare she bring up my ex's name, knowing how much I had been hurt by her. "Then again," I continued, my tone still icy, "it really fits you."

"Are you done?" she asked, her voice strained but steady.

"When did you know? Just… when?"

"Thursday," she said with no hesitation. A let out a small sob that I wasn't able to hold in anymore and covered my eyes for a moment, trying to regain what little composure I had left.

"Thursday," I repeated softly. "and you said nothing. Not on the phone, not in the store, not at the concert…"

"The reasons seem rather moot at this point," she said, her chin held high.

"No..no, they're not, damnit, why?" Why was she just sitting there avoiding really telling me why she found it necessary to hide these things from me, know that it was killing me inside? I had to know. She was breaking my heart…just like Elizabeth. "What…what did I do? Why wasn't… why wasn't I worth the truth?"

"Don't think that," she said quickly. "That's not true."

"No, no… I asked you last night," I leaned forward, a tear escaping and trailing down my face. "I asked you why, and you said 'Is that a rhetorical question'. This time, I want to know."

"You asked why I was leaving,"

"No I didn't, Gabi, and you know better. You said you could get your messages, you had the number, you knew it was me calling."

"Troy, I couldn't get to my messages…" she said.

How could she lie to me like that? How could she actually sit here and lie to my face? "Oh, bullshit." I stood then, turning away from her and running a shaking hand through his hair. I couldn't look at her.

"I couldn't remember my code…"

"Stop," I said, my eyes brimming full of tears.

"I was coming out here to tell you…"

"Stop!" I turned to her, hastily wiping my eyes. "No more lies…please. Just tell me why."

"I'm not lying to you. Not now." She had started to cry as well. How could she sit there and act like this was all hurting her the way it was hurting me? Hadn't she wanted it this way? Obviously she did or she wouldn't have lied about everything the way she did. How was I supposed to trust her now? "It was because…" A blush came to her face as she continued. "Because of…"

"Because of what I do, because of who I am…"

"No, but…" she stopped suddenly. "Ok, yes…but not the way you are thinking right now."

"How very presumptuous of you; you obviously don't know me at all."

"You asked for a reason, I'm trying to tell you." I glared at her. "I…thought that if you knew this was me…this…" She emphasized the word by pointing her body, "was me, the person you'd been talking to that you wouldn't…" The already present blush brightened to an even deeper .

She really doesn't know me at all. "Nice opinion you have of me; remind me to return the compliment some day."

"Does it make you feel better, Troy? To talk to me this way?"

"Don't turn this around on me."

"No, let's hear it from you, Troy, when did you know?" She stood up, walking over to stand directly in front of me.

"The message was very fucking clear, Gabriella," I said, growing even more frustrated that she was still playing it off as the innocent one here who didn't have a clue.

"I didn't get the message, how many times do I have to tell you?" I saw her wince as I backed away from her. "Okay, now your reasons. Why."

"Why what?" I snapped. I still had tears clinging to my lashes and could feel more coming. I just wanted out. I wanted this argument to be over. I wanted to go back to when we were just Not John and Not Telling.

"Why did you sleep…no, you haven't slept yet…" I stepped back again as she reached to swipe the hair out of my eyes. I couldn't bear to feel her hands on me again. "Why did you have sex with me? Couldn't very well call it making love, could you? So come on, let's hear it."

"Did you come up here expecting to be treated like an object?" I asked, my voice breaking slightly. "That's what you came up here for?" She shook her head no.

"But you slept with me knowing…that there was someone else," she said.

"Someone else," I repeated, confused at first, then let out a short laugh. "Wow, that's… nice."

"You said it, damnit, not me!" Her voice was rising as she pointed a finger at me. "You said…"

"I was talking about YOU!" She was left speechless, standing there staring at me. "Stop playing the innocent victim who had no fucking clue how I felt, Gabriella."

"I wouldn't know; I told you…"

"Why did you, Gabi? Why did you…have sex with me?" My tone was softer as I searched her face for the answers I so desperately wanted.

"I wanted to."

"Troy the rock star."

"No…no, that's not true,"

"It's ok, Gabriella, I'm used to it now," I said, trying my hardest to smile. "I just thought you were different, and that if you knew me…knew…me first, then you could accept the rest. And I thought you would, but…I was wrong." I shrugged, brushing her hand away when she laid it on my arm.

"You weren't…"

"You," I interrupted. "You were the one crazy thing in this whole fucked up ride that…made some sort of sense, and I looked forward to sharing everything with you, and I thought maybe it was that way for you, too."

"It is," she said. I shut my eyes, shaking my head. One more lie to add to the pile.

"You don't have to pretend anymore, I promise," I said, trying to smile at her. I reached out and caught one of her tears with my fingertips. "Gabriella…Christine. Absolutely beautiful." She let out a sob as I stepped forward and took her in my arms one last time, sort of as a farewell. "I guess this is it."

She was shaking her head. "It doesn't have to…"

"I can't go back," I stated. I shrugged again and stepped back, both of us clearly shaken by these turn of events. She looked up at me as I struggled with what words to say next.

"I can't say it," I admitted, backing even further away from her. I knew I had to say goodbye to her, but I couldn't bring myself to say it. I inhaled sharply, closing my eyes, trying to gain what last bit of self-control I had.

"Don't say it," she begged, her voice laced with emotion. "Just..don't say it."

"Gabi…" she reached up and covered my mouth with her fingertips.

"Until later," she said, her eyes pleading with me to say it back. I lightly kissed her fingertips before moving them away from her mouth. I stood silent, gazing at her before turning away and walking towards the couch.

Without another word between us, she grabbed her duffle bag and walked out the door. When I heard it shut, I turned to look where she had just gone, with only one thought on my mind as tears slipped quickly down my face.

'What have I done?'

Please review! I can honestly say I was crying the entire time I was writing this. This part of the story gets me every time.