AN: Hey guys it has been almost a year since I last updated this story, and I was deciding whether to continue or to just leave it where it is, but I come to the conclusion it is too good of a story and I put in too much effort to just leave it stranded.
So I will be updating this much more! So please, I really hope you enjoy it! Please review, favorite, follow, and I hope you guys like it! Oh! I promise my writing style will be more organized, I realized how messy it was when I last updates this fic.
Sakura POV
The next day we left the castle and started returning home, and thank god for it. I was in the castle for only one day and it was too much, the people, the parties, the expectations. I have no clue what to do about this whole to become queen situation. I never desired, not once, in my life for that kind of royal position and responsibility. For any other girl this would be a dream come true, but I never had the confidence to be in the spotlight. It was difficult for me to even attend my own coming of age ceremony, running every ceremony and celebration would just destroy me.
Also I never expected Sasuke to do this to me. Him and Madara rushing me to become pregnant secretly to see if I can have children is awful. I want to marry and be with Sasuke, but not like this, not so rushed and sudden. I want to do it in my own way, a way that has nothing to do with royalty or fertility.
Everyone in the carriage seems distraught too actually. Everyone looks tired and empty inside. My family never seems perfectly happy, but we are never empty and there is never the lack of conversation. How will I lie to them when I'm pregnant? Will I just say Sasuke and I want to get married quickly? How long will I have to hide the baby bump is the real question. The amount of time I can hide my stomach is the time gap Sasuke and I have to persuade everyone to plan a wedding.
The fact that none of them have any clue to what happened last night, with King Madara and Sasuke, I feel like I'm lying to everyone or it is only a matter of time my father hears of all this and adds more pressure. My family wouldn't be angry, at least father would be thrilled, just an easy way to become one of the noblest men alive, the only fault is his daughter's expense not even his own. The only one who would care is Kasuka.
The only sound that filled the carriage was the rambling of Kasuka and the sound of the horses trotting from outside. I just looked out the window to see the Uchiha's cart right behind ours, I have no clue how Sasuke is feeling or his family. Do they know? Is Sasuke even nervous about this? I didn't even get to see him this morning so I didn't even get to see if he is more rational about this then last night. I don't know if he thought this over, but I did. When did he even get the chance to speak with Madara without me? He seemed ok with everything. And I mean everything.
"We are almost there." My mother said smiling, trying to wake everyone up from their awful moods.
"Great, I'm feeling sick from the carriage anyways." Rin stated bluntly, but she has a point in her grumpiness. Everyone wants out of this carriage, and I know I need it more then anyone. I can almost feel my throat closing up and my sight is turning blurry, some fresh air and space to be alone will be much appreciated right now. That's all I want, some space and air. The worst feeling is the need to cry but not being able to.
It took thirty more minutes, but finally we started arriving at my house the Haruno manner. Each minute dragged on and my lungs took less and less air, I need to be home alone.
The carriage came to a halt; the moment the doors swung open I jumped out and raced to the door forgetting everyone behind me. I heard the Uchihas and my family starting to pile out, I even heard Sasuke. I have no interest in talking with him right now, and I know that is harsh. I love him, I loved him the moment I met him and didn't even realize it. I will and am going to do all I can for him, if he wants me to become queen and conceive and prince, perfect there is no greater honor a woman can have. I just want some time to think things over first. I want some time to be able to be nervous.
Loving him will be my downfall and I was never strong, but I have to be here.
The servants opened the door to the house; I rushed past them saying thank you, then flashing to my room. I heard my family and the Uchihas comment on my quick exit behind me, not that it will make me come back. I don't have the mental capacity to sit there and listen to anything. I am selfish, I know, but I can't be the perfect quiet girl right now.
"Sakura!" I heard Kasuka yell from below the staircase, trying to call me back. I kept on going pretending that I never heard him.
I made it to my room, and I swung the door open then locked it behind me. The tears crashed down my cheeks with such speed and intensity; everything is hard and hurts. Even the wound from where Rin stabbed me aches. My heartaches, my headaches, and my eyes burn from the saltiness of all the tears. My breathing is becoming jagged, and I start to whimper as I slam myself against my door and then I fall to the ground. I wish it wasn't like this, I wish I wasn't stuck in this awkward situation.
Sasuke POV
The moment the carriage stopped I jumped out to see Sakura. She must be going crazy right now, and I didn't even get the chance to talk to her last night after the whole conversation with my uncle. I know she is confused and I know I said I wouldn't rush her, and I will stand by what I said I won't make her do something before she is ready. I won't do this until she is ready, the throne can wait, and it will always be there. I know I have pushed her past her limits, but I will not make her do this if she can't.
I rushed out to see Sakura steps ahead of me; she is already inside the house. I leave everyone behind to reach her, but Kasuka and Itachi get in my way. Kasuka yelled for her, and I know she heard, but she kept running to her room. Great, she is upset. I thought maybe the ride would calm her down, but all it seemed to do is mess her up even more.
I left the crowd and raced after her. I was far enough behind her to see her run and lock the door to her room. Once I reached her room I walked slowly and quietly, I don't want her to hear me. I was a step away from the door and I heard her panting and crying, she is crying like I have never seen on anyone. Should I leave? I am so bad at comforting people; it might be my worst trait. Shit. I am just standing here listening to her muffled tears from behind her door for what seems forever. I knew, I heard, her crying over the pressure and me. Sakura was never good with pressure and she was just handed a shit ton of it. I just slid to the floor and sat upon the door and listened to her cry. It might have to be the lone worst thing I ever had to go through, and the worst thing is I don't know how to fix it. I am Sasuke Uchiha, the son of two nobles, next in line for the throne, the prodigy in everything. Sasuke Uchiha, the man who will rule a nation, but couldn't comfort his soon to be wife.
For the first time in forever, I doubted myself. I haven't done this in years, and now I remember why I tried not to.
So I just sat outside Sakura's door until I heard her slowly stop. I heard her footsteps and her rambles, I felt her make her way to the door. I just continued to sit here, and she brushed the door open to feel the weight of me against it.
I eased the door open for her since she isn't strong enough to push me off. The moment she saw me she just stood there. She had tears still falling across her face, and I just smirked. The only thing I know how to do when I try to hide my emotions. She just giggled and placed her hand on my head. She played with my hair and continued to cry as I stayed sitting on the floor against her door.
I looked up to her then stood up to face her. She just looked at me smiling through her crying. I escorted her into her room, and closed the door behind us. Our conversation, or crying whatever it is, does not need to be the topic of discussion downstairs. Besides, we have to hide at the best of our ability what is going on. Only Madara, Sakura, and I can know about this. Our parents should have no clue about the situation.
She sat on her bed and I continued to stand.
"Sakura." That's all I could say, with all my words, knowledge, and emotions the most I could mutter was Sakura. Sakura calls herself weak, but it takes true strength to express how you feel to and what needs to be said. I respect her for that, and she has always done that, even when she said nothing at all. If I can't even tell her how I feel, how will she ever know? What makes me so perfect? Why am I worth all this agony?
"Sasuke." Sakura said as she wiped away the tears from her face. She stood and came into me, putting her face in my chest. I tangled my arms around her that is the only thing I could think of doing. I was never the comforting type.
"Sasuke what are we going to do? What if this doesn't work out? What if I can't even become pregnant? What if I am barren?" She looked up at me; her eyes were red and tearing up. This is too much pressure for her.
"You won't be, everything will be fine." I detangle myself from her grip.
"How can you feel calm? I understand that that there is less pressure for you, but do you want this? Do we want this? Do we want to be rushed into something that we are not even positive in?" Sakura cried now standing away from me completely to look me straight in the eyes.
"Do we have a choice?" Is my response, because in reality we don't, Madara expects this from me, so he expects this from Sakura? In all honesty why the hell would I want to become a father so young? Do you see what happens to men that have children too early? Perfect examples, my father and Sakura's father, they both cheat on their wives, hurt their children, and they just seem miserable. I don't want that, but it's not my choice. All of these arrangements for my future, our future, it has nothing to do with what we want.
"Sasuke, you seemed perfectly on board with all this. You agreed to this, I don't have a choice! You should be happy you are going to be king, that's a God-given right!"
"So is becoming queen, but hell you don't seem to want that, so why is king so different? You think I want to be in charge of millions of people? In charge of so many lives and policies? You think I want to have children now? You think I want to be married now?" The moment all the words came out of my mouth, I immediately knew that was a huge mistake. It's not that I don't want to be married to her, I do, I told her I do, but so rushed?
Sakura cried harder, and she hit my arm, no force in it, but it had emotion I could feel it.
"Sakura, I want to marry you I didn't mean that, it's just we are going to have be married in two or three months, that's so quick!"
"Sasuke people are arranged to marry strangers the moment they are born, we are very lucky Sasuke, marrying you is the one thing I'm happy for. I'm doing all of this the queen education, the bearing a child in nine months, and having sex with you before marriage then going to hell for you! And you don't even want to marry me?"
"Sakura that's not what I meant, I do want to marry you. I told you this many times before, I want to marry you."
"I know Sasuke."
"Sakura, do you realize how soon we are going to be parents. I'm not sure if can even stand looking at a baby, let alone raising one."
"Sasuke...we can fake a pregnancy, then I can pretend to have a miscarriage. Madara will never know, and he can't say anything because he thinks I'm capable of becoming pregnant." I'm astonished, what a dirty plan. It won't work.
"Sakura what if you can't become pregnant? We have to be loyal to what we have sworn to do; I don't want a child, but I want to be sure we can have one. "
"If that's what you want, I will do whatever makes you happy." Sakura's crying stopped; she is just there now. I know she feels buried underneath the responsibilities.
"Hn. I think it's time to leave this subject behind. We will do what we promised to do, and we will deal with whatever results come of it."
"Sasuke when are we going to...?"
She didn't even need to finish her sentence I know exactly what she means. When will we fuck? I have made several attempts before, and they have all gone unfruitful. Too bad for her we do not have much time to spare, we need to get her pregnant as soon as possible. We have to be careful with the timing; we have to be somewhere no one can hear and a time when no one is looking for either of us. Also this is the one good thing out of all of this, we don't have to do it once too. It should be several times one after the other, more chance to get pregnant.
"Soon as possible. Not now though, I don't want it to be ruined because we are both upset. Sakura you do realize it's going to be more then one time?"
"Yes, I do...Let's go back downstairs our families must be thinking that's what we are doing right now."
"Fine." With that she washed her face and we both left the room.
Mystery POV
This Uchiha boy and Haruno girl are just making this easier for us, dear Madara thought he would be saving his dear nephew with a marriage and child. What reckless mistake. He should know by now I do not play the game fair, Madara may have won years ago, but I am back for the final victory. Sasuke and Sakura are just his playing cards. Madara failed to give my country an heir, so Sasuke will replace his mistakes. Then when the Haruno girl is pregnant Madara will be assured the lasting of his clan on the throne, but how will he be sure of their safety during such a vulnerable time?
Safety is not a liberty they can have, nor can I allow them to have it. I hear a knock on my door, and then my two assistants wonder through.
"When exactly do you think we have the opportunity to attack? They are aware that we exist, so we have a rather small time frame before they start taking the necessary precautions." Rookie thoughts.
"Calm down, they all have different things on their minds, the last thing they are thinking of is the rumored assassins that are after their son, and now the Haruno daughter. We do not exist in their world, so we will stay back in the darkness. Soon the families will be too preoccupied with a marriage and baby, then during that time when they are vulnerable we will have are way."
"But sir, with the marriage and the baby they will soon be moved to the castle? How will we ever have the chance to attack in the castle? The amount of securities in the area will be too much for us to sleek through."
"I agree, sir, we need to strike now."
"Too bad you two are not in charge. I am telling you wait until the girl is pregnant everyone will be focused on the future heir of the country that they will forget about us, not that they are thinking much of us now."
"Are you sure sir?"
"I am positive, we will wait for the baby."
Sakura POV
A sudden sharp pain travels through my body, it came out up unexpected and it felt like knives jagging at all sides of my womb. I look down to my very pregnant stomach to see blood seeping through my nightgown. The blood is spreading on my sheets like ink to a page. The pain is severe and sharp; I have never in my life, even when Rin injured me, felt this type of pain.
"Someone please help!" I start screaming dying for someone to come help me. Within moments notice maid after maid runs into my bedroom with cold rags, cold water, and other miscellaneous medical equipment.
Aimi came near me with a cold rag laying it down gently on my forehead then another on my lower abdomen. She looked down and spread my legs to then shake her head. With a tear flowing down her cheek.
"Sakura the baby is gone. You lost it." Aimi muttered caressing my cheek. I then look down at the blood on my bed; I look down at my failure as a woman. The physical pain now is nowhere near the level of hurt the emotional pain is causing.
There is my baby, spread across the sheets and nightgown gone. My poor baby, I couldn't keep him safe, I let him slip through my fingers. Sasuke's son is gone. Of course it was a boy, naturally, Sasuke said he knew it was a boy. Sasuke wanted a boy, he was so happy to have one, he was so proud of me. The whole kingdom would have been proud of me; I let everyone down.
" I'm so sorry Sakura, but if you can't bare a child how can you be the queen?" King Madara said in the midst of the darkness appearing out of nowhere ready to pounce.
"Please give me another chance, almost every woman looses a child. Please I know I can bare Sasuke a son! I can do it!" I scream trying to defend myself, I don't know where he came from, but I have to do this, he has to give men another opportunity.
"Sakura my son is gone, you failed. How will I ever be able to marry a woman who can't bare me a child?" Sasuke said showing up out of nowhere as well, next to King Madara with a smirk. His look instantly killed me, whatever hope I had vanished from his disapproval.
" Sasuke please." Was all I could mutter to justify my mistake.
Before Sasuke even answered they both disappeared just like how they showed up; out of nowhere, leaving me alone in the pool of blood that was once my child. The room has never seemed more dark and terrifying then it is now. I feel abused, like someone just knifed my insides, and whatever last ounce of energy I had left after the Uchihas showed up, Sasuke and Madara took it.
The tears soon flooded from my eyes, the maids and Aimi were leaving me one after the other to simmer in my loss. I was so close, I was almost perfect, and I almost had everything. For once in my life I had something...No. I didn't just have something I had everything. I had Sasuke, I had importance, and I had a baby. They are all gone now to leave me alone by myself to fade off into the distance of non-importance.
I cried for what seemed hours until I heard someone talking to me off into the distance, and then I felt someone shaking me. Soon before I knew it I woke up breathing heavily looking around my room to Aimi smiling with a sunrise in the background. It is no longer midnight and my nightgown and sheets are clean with no evidence that blood once soiled them. I felt my stomach and there was no swelling of the womb, everything was normal. I do have tears in my eyes, but I am just flustered from that horrible nightmare I just dreamt through.
"Aimi what happened?" I ask trying to piece myself back to reality.
"You had an nightmare...about some scandalous things if I heard right." Aimi said giving me a parenting look while taking me out of the bed to help me get ready.
I am stuck at a crossroads with this situation, do I tell Aimi about the truth behind this nightmare? I have told her everything and anything that has happened to me throughout my childhood till now; she has been my one true comfort. Aimi has been more supportive then anyone, and in all honesty she has the right to know. Not to mention she will help me with this, she will make things easier.
"Aimi I need to tell you something important...but it is crucial that no one ever hears of this." I warn her, she has the right to know, but she has to promise me to be loyal.
"Sakura I have taken care of you before you could talk, I have listened to all your antics and never spoken about any, this will be no different. I promise dear." Aimi says and she splashes me with water and then sitting me down to brush my hair.
"Aimi its about-" Before I could finish she cut me off.
"Sasuke? I know dear." Aimi said with no hint of emotion she just kept brushing me hair.
"Aimi do you not like Sasuke? You never seem to be thrilled when I mention him or when he is around."
"Sasuke...he is known for being a well mannered man that is gifted in fighting and many other things. He is an all around perfect man to be honest, he is gorgeous and from what I see polite. I just have never been honored with the gift of being able to see what he is like on a personal note. Even when he is living here I find it hard to understand him, so I just feel a little off edge about who he really is. But you have seemed to get close to him, if you trust him, then I do."
"Aimi Sasuke and I are officially courting each other."
"I know, your mother told me. You were busy yesterday so I asked your mother what happened at the ceremony."
"I...my mom really doesn't know anything. It is for her best intentions. After Sasuke officially told everyone King Madara spoke to Sasuke. I still wonder when he did, I was with Sasuke moments before, but then I was told to join the conversation. King Madara spoke about how dire it is for a woman to be able to have children, especially a woman going into a title of royalty."
"Sakura...you have to be careful." Aimi stopped brushing my hair for a moment, but continued on key.
"I know, but please let me finish. King Madara told us that Sasuke, not Itachi is next in line for the throne, because Itachi doesn't want it and he isn't going to marry for a long time he told Madara this, so since Madara's wife can't have children we have to make sure I can. King Madara said that is why the Uchihas are in our house, to keep them safe because Sasuke is next in line, so before Sasuke and I marry we have to make sure I can become pregnant." I slurred all of this as quickly as possible; I had no way of saying it with grace.
"Sakura do you understand what is going on? You are going to be queen, and you are being rushed into having a child! Sakura did you and Sasuke already try to make the baby? Sakura how are you going to cover up the baby before marriage? Sakura this is so much pressure on you and Sasuke! How does Sasuke feel?" Aimi now came to face me, to look me straight in her eyes.
"Once we know for sure I am pregnant we will rush a wedding. Our families don't know please don't say a word! Sasuke and I have not done anything yet, please you have to be careful." I beg, I hug Aimi trying to calm her down.
"When will you two start the plan? I'm assuming King Madara wants you pregnant soon."
"Its up to Sasuke. He doesn't want it to be forced. He rather it take time and...enjoy it then rushing it. He is nervous himself and he in all honesty is less ready for a child then I am."
"Well you are the mother, you have to be. Sasuke will have more time to prepare, and he will always have to do less. If he is the King all his pressure is elsewhere and the only pressure he has is to make sure he does get you pregnant. He just needs sons; you have to pray you have a boy Sakura. Sasuke is going to have more pressure in the sense of being King, which is too much work for a boy his age. " Aimi said as she picked me up to get me dressed.
"Aimi I think we will just be married, when Madara dies then he takes over." Aimi started lacing my corset; she is rushing to get me out of the room.
""Sakura pray you can have children." Aimi whispered with sadness.
"I am." Lastly we put on my green and gold dress with a vine pattern on it.
"Then lets go to breakfast. We will worry about this after." With that we both walked out of my room and to the table to eat. I am upset about her lack of advice, but what can she say at this point? Sasuke and I will just have to bear through the decisions we have already made.
AN: So I know I have not updated this in forever but here is a chapter, I promise I will start updating more and more. Thank you so much for reading I hope you enjoyed it! Please review, favorite, and follow! Sasuke and Sakura the pressure is on!