. . .

The cop tipped the container into the palm of her hand, allowing a few of the capsules from inside to roll out. She brought them to her mouth and swallowed them, each one individually, as she screwed the cap back on. Alison's grudge lasted two days so far and she would be coming home from wherever she'd driven the kids to—Beth didn't remember—any second. Suddenly, Oscar and Gemma burst through the door with huge grins on their faces.

"Hi, Beth!" they greeted her in unison as they ran over to her. They took turns hugging her and she hugged them back, careful not to rattle the pills.

"Hey, kids," she replied with a smile. She discreetly tucked the container in her back pocket as she spoke. "Where's your mom?"

"We beat her from the van to the house," Gemma told her matter-of-factly with a triumphant smile. Oscar rolled his eyes at his younger sister's immature misinterpretation of the situation.

"She had to get our soccer stuff from the back," he explained. Beth nodded and squatted to talk to them.

"And how is she?"

"She's still mad," Gemma answered with that brutal honesty one gets from a young child. Beth looked down for a second, then back up.

"How mad?" she asked.

"Hella," Oscar replied, watching Beth as if he were testing her. She stood up straight and put her hands on her hips as she looked down at him.

"Now, Oscar, I don't think your mother would like you saying that word—" she began to scold him.

"You taught me that!" he objected. Beth shrugged culpably.

"Fair enough, but—"

"I'm telling Mommy you said a bad word!" Gemma told him. He scowled at her, then looked to Beth for help. Beth sighed and looked at the little girl.

"No, you're not going to sell your brother out to Alison. That's not very nice. People don't like snitches—"

"You said you liked snitches," Gemma pointed out. Beth squinted at her with a baffled look.

"I did?" the detective asked. "When?"

"Yeah," Oscar agreed. "One day you came home and said some guy snitched on his partner in the confession room. You said it made your job easier."

"Okay. I may have said those things," Beth admitted to them. "But they only apply to my job. Nobody else in the world likes snitches, not even your own mother. Understand?"

The children nodded and listened intently.

"So you, Gemma, are not going to snitch on your brother—"

"Yeah!" Oscar piped in. He shut up immediately when Beth threw him a chastising look.

"And you, Oscar, are not going to say bad words no matter where you hear them," Beth finished. "We all clear?"

The children nodded again before jubilantly bolting off to their rooms upstairs. Beth put her hands on her hips and praised herself for how well her little lecture went just as Alison walked through the door carrying a bulky load of various soccer equipment. Beth waited until the woman got her shoes off before offering to help.

"Can I help you carry any of that?" she asked, keeping her voice sweet.

"I don't know, can you?" she asked, glaring at her and pushing past her. Beth followed her into the hallway like a lost puppy.

"Okay... May I help—"

"Just leave me alone, Beth," Alison muttered, freezing Beth in place in the hall as she herself went upstairs. Within moments, Alison came back down and Beth moved out of her way in order to let her by and avoid being pushed again before following her out back to the kitchen. She knew Alison would be starting dinner and so she watched silently from the doorway.

"Are you going to just stand there and stare at me dumbly or are you going to help me?" Alison snapped as she stormed around the kitchen. Beth's features pulled into a bewildered look.

"I—" she began. "You just said you wanted me to leave you alone..."

Despite her confusion, Beth immediately stepped in and began counting out plates. She snuck a glance at Alison and smiled to herself despite the woman's sour face.

"Remember when you first moved in with me?" Beth asked, hoping to loosen Alison up. Alison ignored her and continued doing other things. "You told me I had no semblance of order..."

Still no response.

"...and I had to ask you what the hell 'semblance' meant?" Beth forced a shy chuckle. She had to try something else as she could see that Alison wasn't budging. "Or... the first time we slept together?"

Alison's eyes were daggers as she moved to the table instead and Beth chewed the inside of her lip.

"I don't mean—" Beth lowered her tone in case the children could hear her. "Had sex. Although that was... that was pretty damn good, I mean... Anyway, no, I mean sleep. Your toes were so cold... Still are sometimes. And you wanted me to cuddle you for warmth. Even then I—"

"Be quiet, please," Alison replied. Beth shut up and the two worked in silence. Beth moved over to the table, behind Alison, to set the plates down in front of each chair. Alison ducked under the cop's arm to get out and that's when she saw it.

"What is that?" Alison asked, pointing to Beth's butt.

Beth smirked and began a quip saying, "Well, Ali, that's my a—"

"What the dickens is this, Beth!?" Alison hissed, cutting her off and slipping the pill container out of her back pocket with force. The pills inside rattled as the bottle moved with her hand as she spoke. "Are you effing kidding me?"

"Ali," Beth's voice caught in her throat, mainly because she was surprised at Alison's close proximity to the f word. "You're blowing this way out of proportion—"

"Blowing this way out of proportion!" Alison echoed angrily. "Are you on these? Hold on, are you amped right now? In front of my children?"

"'Amped?' What the hell are you talking about—"

"Don't you swear at me, Beth!" Alison snapped, shaking her head as she left the room to go hide the pills somewhere upstairs. "You can ask me for one when you actually need one."

Beth rolled her eyes and stayed in the kitchen. She didn't tell Alison that there was no point in hiding them; one, because she knew exactly where she would hide them and two, because she had other containers stashed in various places including her desk at work. She began to formulate an apology in her mind as she waited for the woman to come back. The cop waited for five minutes, but still Alison didn't show so she went upstairs to find her.

The detective heard sobs emanating from their cracked open bedroom door. She knew instantly that the cries belonged to Alison and she gently pushed the door open to find her sitting hunched over on Beth's side of the bed. The cop felt a twinge of guilt in her heart as she went and sat next to the woman. She tried laying a comforting hand on her back, but Alison flinched and whacked it away.

"Don't touch me," Alison spat without even looking at her. Beth hung her head and stayed in her own personal space bubble and left Alison alone in her own.

"I'm sorry, Ali..." Beth apologised, though she didn't know if she actually meant it. Questioning her own sincerity made the guilt worse and she suddenly felt afraid.

"No. You're not," Alison whispered, refusing to look at her. Beth dropped to her knees, not knowing what else to do, and grabbed Alison's hands.

"I am!" Beth insisted, squeezing Alison's hands gently and trying to coax her into making eye contact. "You have to believe me."

"I have to believe you?" Alison raised her eyebrows in disbelief before scowling at the cop. "Beth, you said you were off those!"

"Ali, I said I was working on weaning myself off them—"

"No. You said you were off them," Alison corrected her, knowing she'd caught her in a lie. "Completely."

Beth paused and thought a moment. Had she really lied to Alison? If she told Alison she was completely off them, who did she say the other thing to?

Art, dumbass, her brain reminded her. Just the other day.

Beth shook her head, realising that she had indeed lied to the suburban woman. She never used to lie to her, yet here she was caught in a huge lie.

"I'm fucked up. Okay, Ali?" Beth looked up at her desperately. "I know and I'm sorry. And I- I fucked up at work."

"How?" Alison asked, her eyes conveying fear and concern. Beth felt a stab of pain in her chest in response to seeing Alison look at her like that.

"Well, I... I shot a woman," Beth admitted.

"You what?" Alison didn't believe she'd heard the cop correctly.

"I shot a woman. I was on a lunch break with Art and Angela and well, Art told me that I saw a suspect from a case I'm on and I shot her because she'd had a gun, only it wasn't actually her... It was an innocent civilian. And it wasn't a gun... It was a cellphone," Beth confessed, choosing her wording carefully.

"Beth..." Alison paused, not knowing what to say. "I didn't know it was that bad... I knew something was up that day, I just didn't think... I'm so sorry."

"Nah, I was being an ass too though," Beth admitted with an apologetic shrug.

"I know," Alison responded and Beth ignored the small dig she made. "Injuring someone, especially an innocent is a difficult thing to deal with, especially if it was an accident."

Right... An 'accident'...

"Yeah you'd know, wouldn't you?" Beth joked softly in reference to Alison's golf club incident and hoping to get a smile out of her. Alison smiled and shook her head.

"You got me," Alison admitted scoldingly. Beth smiled up at her and kissed her on the knee.

"So do you love me again?" Beth asked, insecurity leaking out her eyes. Alison's heart practically stopped at this vulnerability in the cop's eyes.

"Beth, I never stopped loving you," Alison assured her. "I was just angry. Being angry at someone doesn't mean you stop loving that person..."

"That's good for my sake," Beth forced a laugh and masked her lack of confidence once again.

"One more thing."

"Anything."

"Have you taken any recently?" the soccer mom asked. She knew it was a dumb question, but she wanted Beth to answer her honestly. Beth nodded right in front of her. "Are you now or have ever been under the influence in front of my kids?"

Beth sighed, kissed Alison's hand, and looked up at her before looking her straight in the eyes and answering, "No."

Lie #2, her brain tallied. Technically lie #3 if you count the other day when you told her nothing too serious happened at work...

The sound of the capsules rattling snapped beth from her thoughts as Alison held them up to her as she asked, "Can I trust you with these?"

Beth took a deep breath, smiled, and shook her head before answering in a lighthearted tone, "No, you can't."

"I'm going to trust you with them anyway," Alison told her, placing the container in her hand. She seemed confident that Beth would do the right thing. "Okay?"

Before Beth could reply, Alison wiped her eyes and left the room to go back to prepping for the meal. Beth pressed her lips together and looked down at the little container in her hand.

"Please don't," Beth whispered once she was sure Alison was out of earshot. She exhaled slowly before reluctantly following Alison's path down to the kitchen. She crossed the room, made sure the woman was watching her and threw the pill bottle in the trash before looking at Alison for approval. "I'm all done."

"I'm very proud of you, Beth," Alison told her with a satisfied tone. Those words coming from Alison should've made the cop feel better, but they didn't. Instead she began feeling sick again, just as she had the other day.

Everything is just lies, lies, lies with you! Beth thought.

"Beth, you're not looking too well..."

"I'm fine," Beth told her, managing a smile. "I think I just... I'm gonna go lie down for a bit. Sleep a while, you know?"

"Okay..." Alison reluctantly replied with a nod. She let Beth go and as soon as the cop disappeared from sight, she opened the trash and checked for the pill bottle just in case. It was still there.