A/n- The livecast is in this one, so, smut, masturbation, fantasies... Just a bit of angst if you squint.
Story!
(Y/n) went up and grabbed her phone as soon as they were at the house, excited to see an update saying that her favorite podcaster was going to do a live tip show tonight.
She didn't have any money to give, but she liked hearing him talk, his low, sweet, sensual voice making butterflies flutter in her stomach.
She made her way downstairs and set up the things for Bucky if he had a nightmare in the middle of the night; a teacup, tea ready to be brewed in the pot, and a pan of water on the stove ready to heat up.
She looked around, making sure that everything was cleaned for the night, but of course it was, they hadn't been there for half the day.
She grabbed her water bottle from upstairs and went back down to fill it up, and saw Bucky taking two bottles of water from the fridge as she made it back to the kitchen.
(Y/n) pressed her lips together, biting the inside of them. How did she tell him that she wanted to be left alone without sounding like an ungrateful bitch?
"So," Bucky spoke, seeming a little hesitant. "I have some things I have to do for my freelance thing..."
She nodded to him.
"And I'll be in my room, on the computer. It's a voice meeting, so, I need quiet in there. And I can't be disturbed."
She nodded again. "No problem." She was glad he'd said something, that way she didn't have to, and she got the solitude she needed.
They went their separate ways, and closed their doors.
(Y/n) locked the door, grabbing her headphones and getting undressed, putting on Bucky's shirt and boxers, which she had decided to keep as her pajamas for as long as she was here... And maybe after, when she "accidentally" packed them with her things.
She got comfortable and checked the clock. Still half an hour until the cast.
She decided to go to the bathroom to make sure that she wouldn't have to halfway through listening to the low voice she'd come to long for some nights.
She went into the bathroom, and could hear Bucky talking on the other side of the wall, not what he was saying, just that he was talking.
She lifted a brow as she wondered what he and the other person or people were talking about, wondering, not for the first time what his "freelance" business was.
Maybe he was a consultant for writers about war? Or maybe it had to do with his arm, maybe he was talking to Tony Stark, or, more likely, someone at Stark Enterprises, about how it was working.
She finished and went back to her room, getting comfortable and all setup again.
Bucky pulled up the picture of (Y/n) that he had saved on his computer.
It wasn't that he always thought of her, or needed the picture for what he was going to do, but, it was easier to have it up, just in case he needed it later.
Getting turned on and masturbating to orgasm on command was harder than people seemed to think it was.
He set his bottles of water at the ready and opened the drawer to pull out the lube and grab a clean hand towel to clean up with. He opened all of the stories and comments he had qued to read, and the order he had planned them, then pulled up all of the links he needed for his donation account, the streaming account, and messaging, then went through his warm up exercises, reading phrases and sentences so that he didn't strain his voice talking for as long as he was going to have to.
After that, he made himself comfortable in the chair, glad that he'd invested in a very comfortable one so that he wouldn't need to shift and move around a lot. He took off his shirt, wearing just his jeans and boxers, since the girls seemed to like hearing him undo and take off his pants.
He tested his mic and made sure everything was plugged in, turned on or off, and close enough that he could reach it if he needed to. Then he amped himself up, decided on a last minute change and pulled up a document, closing the one he had planned to use and typing as fast as he could.
(Y/n) laid back on the bed, looking for apartments for rent, since the first one had obviously fallen through after losing her job.
She had to get out of here, quick; being around Bucky so much was bringing back all of her feelings about him from high school, and listening to these podcasts was making her think of him doing these things to her, imagine his eyes staring into hers, his body over her-
She shook her head, trying to ignore the pain growing in her heart and stomach at the desire filling her, and the knowledge that not only would he never want her, but he had the opposite feelings for her.
His comment earlier about her kissing him filled her with bitter tears.
As if he would ever want her, as if he weren't still playing that stupid, horrible joke on her he'd started in high school and hadn't gotten to finish.
Her alarm went off and she opened the app she had downloaded specifically to listen to his live podcasts. It was silent for a few moments, and then, the "live" light glowed and a sudden static then silent, but live air came over the speakers of her headphones.
"Hello, lovelies, is the line working?" His deep voice paused as he read the messages that popped up saying that it was good. "Well, it's good to be heard." He chuckled and (Y/n) smiled.
His chuckle was so warm when it was real.
"Well, then, let's get started. I'll be your host, Jamie, and you, I hope, will be my willing audience. First, I'll start with some lovely things that you all have asked for me to whisper into your ear."
(Y/n) kept looking at the search for apartments, letting the words whisper in her ear, giving a little bit of a laugh, not believing that the podcaster's real name was Jamie.
"You taste delicious. That seems to be a very popular one tonight," he chuckled again. "Alright, ladies, I have a few selections that I want to read for you. The first is from..."
(Y/n) listened a little, the stories were good sometimes, sometimes not, but listening the him read them was usually the best part about them.
The erotic stories that he read were over, and now, the sound of him getting even more comfortable came over the app.
"Now, ladies, it's time for the main event. I have to tell you, I am really worked up tonight." He chuckled as he read the messages. "Yeah, partly from that, but partly from things that are happening in the real world around me... Whoa, whoa, whoa," he chided whoever was sending the messages he was reacting to. "Ladies, please be ladies. Thank you, Furfield46, and LadyDiana1920, I appreciate it, and you are right. If I choose to be with anyone in real life, it is my life, my choice, and her choice, as well. I don't want any of you getting jealous, especially when I didn't even say that I am with anyone. There are just things going on around me that are bringing up some feelings I haven't had since high school. So I'm like a horny teenager," he chuckled.
(Y/n) felt bad for him, and the girl he would eventually end up with.
He seemed like such a nice guy, though she knew at least part of that would be his podcasting persona, she enjoyed what he gave, but she hoped that he would find love and happiness; she thought that everyone deserved those things. She even hoped that she eventually found a man who wasn't a complete asshole, as well, though if there were a list of people who would never get that, she was most likely on it.
It was too bad that some of his fans were so jealous.
"Now, ladies, I'm going to post the tip jar again before we start, and then I'm going to start again."
Silence prevailed for a moment.
"I wanted to let you know that I am really worked up, there are things going on around me right now that are bringing up feelings I haven't dealt with since high school, and it's getting me all worked up so easily, that's why the sudden livecast. But I have been getting really worked up a lot lately, so I'm sorry if I can't last as long as I usually do." His voice was so sweet as he was asking for forgiveness before he even knew whether he needed it. "Thank you, ladies, for the support... See, there are the sweet dolls I know you all are."
There was a pause and some barely audible noises as he shifted things around in his space to get set up and comfortable for what was happening next.
"Ok, now please remember, I'm telling you a story, so I won't be able to respond to comments. Here we go."
He took a breath, and seemed to hesitate, but then spoke, "Hey, beautiful." He gave a hum in appreciation, and it turned to a chuckle. "Your cheeks are so cute when they're red. It makes me want to kiss them... Hm? What's wrong, doll?" His voice sounded sincere, as though he was really worried about who he was talking to. "Why are you hiding? Ah, babydoll- don't hide, I love what you're wearing... I don't care that you're not wearing a bra... I don't care if you have panties on or not. In fact it might be sexier if you don't... I don't care what the story is, I don't care if you did it because you had no other option, or because you just wanted to- You look fucking amazing in my clothes..."
(Y/n)'s eyes jerked up to the doorway, startled to think that maybe Bucky had spoken to her, but the door was still closed.
"You do... Here, let me show you. Let me see your hand, so I can press it against my hard cock. Can you feel it through my jeans?" He chuckled. "Yeah, I know that you can... You make me so hard, just looking at you... I love the way my shirt is nearly hanging off of your shoulders, showing me all of the tender skin I don't get to see very often. Like the tops of your shoulders, and your collar bones... I don't know why you insist on hiding them in your everyday clothes. They are a part of you, and doll- You. Are. Beautiful."
(Y/n) felt a stab of pain.
He'd never done this kind of audio before, and it hurt a little the hear these words and know, without a doubt, that he could never be talking about her. Not because she was in love with him and he didn't even know she existed, but because she wasn't beautiful.
She might- maybe, that is, just maybe- be pretty... But she was not very good at looking pretty, which might be why Jason, that ass, had cheated on her. That, and her lack of ability in bed.
"Baby, don't- I don't want to see you look at the floor. I want to see you looking at me," his voice told her. It sounded soft, a little sad. "Babydoll, I don't want to see those tears in your eyes, I want to see you smile... I don't know who hurt you, but I want to make you feel better... I want to see the sparkle in your eyes like it used to be... I miss the humor in your eyes when you laughed at my stupid jokes, and how you looked at me like you wanted me to wrap you in my arms and never let go..."
He cleared his throat, and it was obvious that it had gotten tight, but the question was, always was, was it real, or was he a good actor?
"Babydoll, I think that you are the most beautiful woman on Earth, and nothing can change that. I don't care whatever that idiot, or those idiots, said- You- are- beautiful. You are my beautiful. My type of beautiful... You always have been. C'mere..." There was a little bit of noise as he shifted around. "Come let me kiss you."
Soft kissing noises were picked up by the mic, and they sent shivers down (Y/n)'s spine.
"You are so beautiful. And doll, I am not even joking about how sexy you are in my clothes, like you're just daring everyone to guess what we've done together. Where I've only dreamt of kissing you, and where I really have. God, when you hold those amazing breasts up with your folded arms and then shrug like that- I've got two things to say to you; I really love the way your breasts jiggle, just a bit, like they're trying to get my attention, and- I don't know who made you think they're not amazing and something to be celebrated, but I'm going to have to change your thinking on that. So, c'mere, come a bit closer. There you go. That's right, doll, straddle my lap. Let me run my hands up the bare backs of your thighs. Feel your silky smooth skin..."
More soft kissing noises filtered through the mic. "Let me kiss that beautiful face. Those delicious lips. Along your jaw... down your neck... down to that sexy, revealed skin, on your shoulders and collarbone. Let me give gentle little licks on them as I squeeze your hips, my fingers slipping under the edge of the shorts you borrowed from me... You know that those have been against me, my bare skin, right?" He asked, and the husky tone in his voice set off desire in (Y/n)'s belly.
She looked down at the boxers barely visible beneath the shirt she was wearing and bit her lip.
They had, that's right; they had covered and held Bucky in them, where she was now.
"God, when I think about how they've held me, how the fabric that my stiff cock is now pressing against, and maybe just a little into, your pussy has been against my cock, my balls-" he groaned, "doll, I bet you can't tell, but there are secret stains on them; I have never been able to help myself, keep from touching myself when I'm thinking of you-"
(Y/n) felt like her breath had been stolen; this all sounded so real.
He'd done recordings before where he warned that he was admitting to fantasies that he had, and that had sounded so real compared to his other works, and this was starting to sound like one of them.
She felt bad for the poor girl he was thinking about, whoever she was; if the outburst earlier was any indication, his crazy fans would probably try to decapitate her and put her head on a spike.
"-and doll, those stains are all over my underwear- yes, even the ones you're wearing..."
Oh god, were there stains on Bucky's boxers like that, too? (Y/n) blushed, desire growing in her at the thought.
"Mmm... Your nipples are so hard under my shirt, doll. It's so easy to roll them and tweak them through the fabric." Bucky took a breath as his eyes closed, imagining his fingers doing just what he was saying to (Y/n). "They're so needy... Babydoll, can I tell you a secret? ... You leaned over to get something out of the fridge and I nearly lost my mind when my shirt hung down so low I could almost see everything under it- and these shorts, yes, the ones I've gotten pushed down your ass a fair ways, they rode up a bit, too."
Bucky's eyes opened as he looked back at the picture of (Y/n), one of two that Steve had posted on his social media and not tagged her in so she wouldn't know he'd taken them.
One she was standing in her workout clothes at the gym, looking off to the side with that just a little sad, but neutral look on her face, and the other, the same, except that she was looking nearly at the camera and had that beautiful, sparkly eyed, humorously smiling look on her face.
They had been put up as a pair with the caption, 'made her think I was taking a selfie.'
"When they did... God, baby, I wanted to hold your hips in my hands and make you scream my name right there in the kitchen..." He groaned needily. "Yes, I'm nibbling your nipples, with my teeth, but the fabric should protect them from the roughest of my bites... You are so fucking beautiful-" Bucky had to cut himself off as he nearly said (Y/n)'s name out loud.
It's not like she could hear him with how far away her room was, and he definitely didn't think she was listening; he wasn't very well known, and who knew if she even listened to podcasts at all, let alone erotic ones where he bared his soul in the safety of a crowd of strangers who would never know him, but if he said her name, the same women who had started rioting and calling for "the bitch to go" when he'd just mentioned that the situation he was in was turning him on would make her life hell, not to mention out him and the deepest of the feelings he couldn't get rid of.
"I do love teasing your nipples through my shirt- especially because it's my shirt- but my hands want to feel them for real doll, feel the skin against mine-" He let out a sigh, his desire pushing out through his lips as his hand stroked over the bulge pressing against his jeans. "Ahhh, doll, pressing that hot, wet spot against me- you're going to drive me crazy before I even get you naked. Let's get this shirt out of the way, first- don't worry, you can always put it back on after- if you can move, which I don't intend to let happen..."
He licked his lips as he imagined pulling his shirt off of (Y/n), wondering what her bra looked like, not the sports ones, but the real one she'd been wearing earlier. Was it lacy? Pink? Black? White?
He groaned, his hand still rubbing against him to encourage his cock to keep stiff until he got to the part in the story where he finally got to touch it.
"Fuck, doll, your breasts are even more beautiful with nothing on them- actually, I can think of one thing that would make them even more beautiful, know what it is?" He asked, pausing as he imagined stroking his hands over (Y/n)'s beautiful chest, knowing that they would be, even though he had to take a guess at what they looked like.
He imagined smooth, soft skin, maybe a dimple or dip where they met her body, giving his fingers and hands something to rest on and trace around, under her breasts until her got to the center of her chest where he would kiss and nibble until she moaned for him.
"Ah, babydoll, the only thing on your breast that could make it more beautiful is my mouth." He put his hand up with one finger up, licking and starting to suck on it so that the noise was picked up by his microphone. "Well, doll," he asked as he licked his finger, imagining it to be (Y/n)'s stiff nipple, "does it look more beautiful? You have to look down here and tell me, 'cause the only thing my mind can focus on right now is how delicious it is, mmm... and it is so delicious. Let's check this one, too," he said, as though he was moving to the other one.
Another groan left him as his hips pressed against his hand. "Doll, you really are trying to drive me crazy aren't you; grinding against me like that..."
(Y/n)'s cheeks had heated. His voice was so sexy, like he was really into what he was saying, or who he was thinking about.
She bit her lip, trying to ignore her body telling her it wanted her to touch it.
What was happening to her? Before she'd stayed here with Bucky, she had hardly ever touched herself to the sounds from these podcasts, just letting the fantasies wash over her and enjoying the story, but now, being around him so much, every glance at him, every time she saw his muscles flexing as he moved, every time he smirked, every time she caught him pulling his bottom lip across his teeth, especially then, she felt the need to have him touch her, and when she heard the podcasts, the podcaster's voice started to sound like him; like the now severely muscled man with the metal arm that drove her crazy just by existing in the same place as her.
For God's sake, it had only been a week! How did he have this much effect on her already?!
She couldn't resist, her body needing release despite having had it twice already this week. She was turning into a sex starved maniac like she'd never been before, and she knew that it was in no small part due to the strong, silent ex soldier down the hall.
Her hands slid under his shirt to touch herself as she played along with the podcaster.
Bucky bit his finger as his mind started running wild over (Y/n)'s body on him.
"Your hips are so soft, baby, they really get me turned on, but I have to focus a little, and right now, it's on your breasts- mmm," he moaned softly around where his teeth still held his finger. "Yeah, they're so soft in my hands doll. Ooooh," he groaned as his hand stroked him through his pants. "Your breasts look so pretty when I squeeze them just a little bit. Mmm, lean a little closer, babydoll, let me suck your pretty nipples while I pull you harder against me-" He gave a half groan, half growl. "Fuck-" He groaned at the thoughts his imagination was feeding him. "Your hot pussy feels so good pressed against me, baby..."
He panted for a moment, then groaned, unable to stand the teasing anymore. "Babydoll- fuck, I can't take it anymore- I need you, right now..."
He made a little bit of noise as he struggled with his pants to get them off.
"Yeah, doll, we could pull those off of you, but baby, I need to be inside you right now, so they're just getting pulled to the side," he panted as he squirted a bit of lube on his hand and pulled his boxers down with the other.
His cock sprang out, desperate for what it had been teased with; (Y/n), but it was just going to have to be satisfied with his hand. "Oh, God, I need you so bad, dollf-, I really do need you, so fucking bad."
Bucky held his hand tighter than he would need it, so that he would have to work himself in, imagining (Y/n) sliding down around him. "Oh-oooooooh," he groaned raggedly, "babydoll- Oh, you feel so fucking good around me," he was panting a little, his hand squeezing him a bit. "Baby, you're so tight... You're going to have me cumming before I even get going," he chuckled a little, but moaned as he slightly moved his hand. "Ugh, fuck, doll- you are so beautiful on top of me, riding my cock," he panted as his hand loosened and started stroking.
"I know you can feel how hard you make me, now; I'm pressing into you so perfectly- filling you so perfectly- oh, god- but it's not because of me, no. It's because you are so perfect, so amazing... Ah, doll... God, I wanna hear you moan my name, baby- I dream about it at night... oh, fuck-"
Bucky was panting, trying to keep oxygen in his brain as his hand moved up and down his cock. He could tell that he was rambling, but with (Y/n)'s imagined face contorting in pleasure above him, her sweet little cunt riding him, letting him fill it as much as he could- it was hard to keep random thoughts from spilling out of his mouth.
"Babydoll... My doll-" He moaned and gasped for a second. "You- you said th-that you had thought about having sex on the table- and- oh, doll- fuck- every time I see you in that room, I think about fucking you on the table- sitting you on it and pulling your clothes off- tearing off your panties and bra so that I can lay you back, spread you across the damn table and plow into you... fuck you until you can't walk straight," he moaned, and a needy whine filled the noise.
"I try to keep calm, but every time we're eating at the table- the only thing I can think about is- oh god- how good your pussy would feel around me while I fuck you, all the food forgotten and tossed onto the floor- oh god- please come with me, oh, come with me, doll-" Bucky panted, "Oh fuck, you're so beautiful, I was too busy staring at your gorgeous tits bouncing as you rode me- I didn't notice it sneaking up on me, babydoll- oh, god- please, I need to feel you come around me, squeezing me-" He gasped, trying to last through a few more lines, "so tight that- fuck- doll, I need you to- ah- ah- come with me- ah- ah-"
Bucky hovered at the edge; he wasn't going to make it, he was on borrowed time as it was. "C-come with me- doll-! Ah- ah!" Bucky cried out, grunting and groaning into his mic, getting close to it so he could stay quiet as needy, orgasmic growls and moans left his lips.
God, his imagination must be playing tricks on him, because he thought he heard someone cry his name, but (Y/n) would never, and there was no one around for a few miles.
He panted as his heart calmed itself, trying not to overthink everything he had just imagined with (Y/n), his hand supporting his head closer to the mic, though it just wanted to lay on the desk.
(Y/n) panted as she caught her breath, hoping that the cry that had escaped her lips of Bucky's name hadn't been too loud.
She cursed silently as she laid there, spread across the bed, her legs splayed, Bucky's boxers around her calves, his shirt pulled up to her shoulders, baring everything to anyone who opened the door, her limbs too full of orgasm tingles and numbness to be able to move. It was such an intense orgasm, she couldn't focus on anything for a moment.
"Babydoll," he panted, "I hope that you just came as hard as I did, because I'm seeing the world in a whole new set of colors," he chuckled. "And now there's going to be a new stain on those shorts, but this one is going to be from both of us," he panted, a smile audible in his voice.
A smile lifted the corner of (Y/n)'s lips, as she tried to catch her breath.
"All right, ladies," the low, satisfied voice in her ear said after another moment of panting. "Let's see those hands, who came?"
(Y/n) lifted her hand off of the bed, but it plopped back down as she sighed in contentment.
"Quite a few of you, I see," he commented. Bucky felt his lips quirk up.
This is the part that usually made him feel the best; even if he wasn't in the same room as them, even with his scars and metal arm, he could make women orgasm, and en mass, without touching them, but somehow, it felt bitter this time.
(Y/n) wasn't there with him, and she was the only woman he wanted to make come, right now.
"How sexy, all of you beautiful women coming to my voice. And when I post this, you can all do it again. I want to thank you all, even you lurkers- maybe especially you lurkers," he chuckled, "for being here. For sticking around till the end. For donating, all of those who did. It helps support my lifestyle," he laughed again. "And now, my sexy ladies, I am a bit tired, and I have something I need to go clean up. Until next time, goodnight."
Bucky posted the link for the donation site again, then turned off the streaming page and stopped the recording.
He used the part of the towel he hadn't cum in to clean himself up a bit, then tucked himself into his pants and climbed out of the chair, going to the bathroom and cleaning up for real.
He exited the bathroom, quietly walking down to the end of the hall to (Y/n)'s room. His forehead touched the door as bitter regret pricked at his heart.
He needed to remember what she had done to him in high school. He needed to remember how crazy she was, otherwise-
Bucky pushed away those thoughts, instead focusing on the desire to open the door and look in at (Y/n). It wasn't creepy- seriously, just like checking on a sleeping child... except that she was a full grown adult, who didn't need him to check on her.
He just really wanted to see her face right now...
Bucky clenched his eyes and jaw shut, standing from the door and going downstairs, making rounds to check that everything was locked and safe, though he knew it wouldn't help his nightmares.