"So… Most of my cats have… prior baton experience… So the ladies always figured it out eventually. I'm not sure how to help."
"Oh my god. Just sit there and eat your cheese. I have got to stretch my brain."
"Sitting here and eating my cheese is one of my favorite past times." Marinette paced around the room.
"How did you first few days with the actual Chat Noir go?"
"The kid had a transformation sequence all planned out. It seemed like he had rehearsed it for months, it came so naturally. But anyway, I floated around in his room, I was really hungry so i tried to find something to eat, and then we talked a little bit. As soon as he heard the transformation phrase, he sucked me into his ring and went on his merry way as a fake leather-clad cat boy."
"I've always wondered about the getup…"
"I would like to pass it off as entirely him, but no. Stylistic choices by yours truly."
"Is it like… A fetish?" Plagg nearly choked on his cheese, "Or is there a better reason for it?"
"Okay, FIRST OF ALL, Kwami's are not sexual beings. Nothing turns us on. We are pretty sure that we can't even reproduce, but why would we if we could. If we make another Kwami, then it would imbalance us. SECOND OF ALL, leather is an excellent material for not only lightweight armor, but also flexibility, silence when a rubberized layer is applied over it, and supreme amounts of night camoflauge. THIRD OF ALL…"
"What, does it cling to the body just right to draw lustful stares?" Plagg was quiet for a moment.
"...FOURTH OF ALL…"
"Oh my god."
XXXXXXXXXXX (plagg confirmed for leather club leader)
"One more, Adrien! Come on, you can do this!" Adrien was laying face down on the floor, gasping for breath.
"That's wh…. What you s… said… five times… ago…"
"All of my Ladybugs have endurance and staying power. You are not going to be an exception."
"Tikki we fought… two akumas today… and one yesterday… I am so beat and so goddamn hungry. I would kill a man for a french fry." Tikki gave him a disapproving look. he continued, "Metaphorically, of course."
"How much do you eat?"
"Well, as of right now I am on a diet and calorie burning workout program, so around 1800-2200 calories a day, mostly protein and greens, with some carbohydr-"
"2000 CALORIES A DAY?" Adrien jolted a small bit.
"Y-Yes?"
"And you're running around Paris in a skintight fake leather cat suit all the time? How are you not dead?"
"Uh, willpower, incredible self-control, and mental repression, mainly."
"I'm getting you more food. We are going to double your calorie intake. Look at you. You could hold 50 kilograms of weights and you'd still only weigh 20 kilograms. I know that Plagg likes them skinny, lean, and small, but this is insane."
"I weigh 54 kilograms, mind you. And Plagg didn't really know. He always just sleeps in my pocket and eats cheese."
"I am going to give that cat a stern talking to. After we get you some food."
"Okay. Where are we going?"
"You are sitting down and not wasting any more calories than you have to." Adrien sat down as Tikki shut her eyes and concentrated. He just looked at the slightly shimmering creature for a while, but the silence droned on. An open window let the street's noises come in. It was a quiet early Friday morning, but the murmurs of sound came through. Cars, rustling leaves, the caw of a crow, the yell of a man, some faint pop song on a radio, and a large smack. Adrien jumped and looked at the window as a crow flew away. He supposed the crow had hit the window.
"And breakfast is served!" Tikki gave him a large grin and pointed at the window.
"Wh…? I'm not going to eat a bird!" Tikki blinked.
"What kind of cat are you? And no, not the bird. The bird was the delivery boy. THAT is the package." Tikki pointed lower to a large McDonalds bag laying on the floor below the window, surrounded by a couple of black feathers.
"H-How did you do that?" Adrien looked astounded.
"Ladybugs are lucky! The crow was hungry, so it grabbed a man's bag off the table. Unfortunately, it was a little too eager, and ran into your window. No one was harmed, the man laughed it off and bought another, the bird is unharmed and will find a nice big batch of raisins that a toddler dropped at the park. All is well that ends well!"
"Could Plagg do something like that?"
"Luckiness for one is just unluckiness for another. If you win the lottery, everyone else did not win the lottery. If you find $20, someone lost $20. He can do it, just no one really gets a happy ending. Just like I can spread destruction, but in the end it is better than it was."
"That's kind of… Abstract? Deep?"
"Adrien, that is about as deep as a puddle in a desert."
XXXXXXXXXXX (tikki confirmed for team mom)
"Alya, Nino, please sit in the right places. Sabrina, Chloe, you too. Alix, Max, Kim, Mylene, what are all of you doing out of your places?"
"We all got hit by the akuma." The teacher paused for a moment.
"Oh. Well… I, uh, hope we can still focus through our… predicaments…" Alya, or Nino, spoke up.
"Can we please just have a study hall? I could not find a comfortable position to sleep last night."
"I bet Alya did. It was a great weight off her chest!" Adrien smiled and snapped.
"Bro, I love you, but I don't need this right now."
"I did actually sleep really well, thank you for asking."
"Yes, you all may use this class for study hall. You have a project for Ms. Bustier's, correct? You can work on that, but please keep the noise level down." With a murmur, the class separated into their groups, some working, some not. Adrien followed behind Marinette to the rear of the class to join Nate and Rose.
"This is going to take some getting used to, Juleka."
"Yeah, I know. I haven't work colors this bright since elementary. And neither has my body." Juleka pointed over to Juleka, or Rose, wearing a loose braid and clothes that Rose had seemingly been saving for a day like this. Rose, sensing the looks, turned her head. Smiling to the group, she winked and blew a kiss at Juleka, then turned away with a grin.
"That was really weird to see you do." Marinette blinked.
"If you think that was weird, think about me." Juleka covered her face with her arms. Nate chuckled and looked up from his laptop.
"Just wait till Rose gets her body back. Now that you two are a thing and all." Juleka made a light eep noise as Adrien and Marinette turned to look at Juleka's reddening face.
"Are you…?"
"Is that…?"
"You two are dating now?!" Adrien and Marinette said in unison, giant grins plastered on their faces. Juleka buried herself in her arms as much as she could and groaned.
"Essentially… But, as Rose said, 'It's too weird to make moves on my own body' so… She's saving it all up I bet." Marinette and Adrien thought of their romantic interests in their bodies. It was unnerving for sure.
"Well, uh, I'm s-sure that Chat Noir and Ladybug will fix all this!" Marinette willed the redness away from her face. Adrien nodded.
"They always do. But, they've been switched as well, so… I guess give it time? It must be kinda hard and new to them."
"I'm just glad I haven't been switched with anyone. Who knows what it would do to my muscle memory. Anyways, here is what I got so far. Luckily you two left your parts on the dropbox, so I was able to put together our rough draft of our presentation together. I had nothing better to do except watch Juleka and Rose flirt with each other and draw…"
"Please tell me you didn't draw Rose and I flirting."
"I don't want to lie to you."
"Oh my god…"
"I will not apologize for art."
"Nate, this is pretty good! I did find some images that would better go with my section though. Could we work on it tonight?"
"Oh, yeah! Sure thing! It's Friday so I should be really free tonight."
"Great! I should be free after 7 or so. What about you two? Juleka? Marinette?" Marinette flapped her jaw, but Rose, or Juleka, spoke.
"I already got my parts done yesterday. And since Nate has become this project's Kaiser, you all get to spend some nice time with him."
"So you can spend time with Rose."
"Okay… Yes, but, did it need to be said?"
"I-I'll be joining you t-tonight if you don't mind…"
"We need your parts, Marinette. We have to mind you not being there."
"Then y-yeah. After seven works!" Marinette smiled at the group, and everyone seemed to pause. Nate's pencil lead cracked, Adrien's jaw slowly fell, and Rose's, or Juleka's, eyes widened. Marinette opened her eyes again, Juleka cleared her throat and looked out the window, Adrien shut his mouth and sucked his teeth, Nate blinked a few times and clicked out more lead on his pencil. Marinette is an angel.
XXXXXXXXXXX (julerose/roseka confirmed for canon for this fic at least please give us lesbians astruc please)
Ladybug twirled the yo-yo around in front of a amused Chat Noire. He switched hands, lengthened and shortened the string, whipped it 10 meters forward and 10 meters back. Chat Noire gave him a slow applause.
"You did better than I did in a day."
"I had a lot of motivation!"
"You wanted to impress me, huh?"
"But of course. It was quite difficult to get at first."
"At first? Just wait until you try the more advanced stuff." Chat Noire walked across the roof to Ladybug, and handed him a rock, "Throw that up and hit it."
"No way. That is impossible."
"Hand it over, pal. Keep the rock, you toss it." Ladybug handed her the yo-yo. Chat took up a stance, and swung it in a circle next to her. She winked at Ladybug, who began to reflect his suit, "Whenever you're ready, Mr. Cherry."
Ladybug tossed the rock at a low angle, testing Chat Noire's reaction speed. The rock spun terribly, changing it's trajectory several times. Ladybug looked back at Chat with a smirk, only to find a bigger one. She sunk low, and swung the yo-yo forward. Ladybug could barely follow it. The rock hit the ground as the yo-yo swished past it. Ladybug blinked, Chat Noire stopped and the yo-yo hit the wall.
"Uh…"
"I missed?" Ladybug gave a high pitched laugh.
"You were so confident!"
"It… It's heavier! Mine was lighter! Do it again!" Chat Noire got in her stance again, a determined look on her face.
"Alrighty, Chat." Ladybug smirked and lightly tossed another rock. Chat Noire couldn't hit pebbles out of the air. Ladybug looked back at Chat Noire, the black hair blowing in the wind, the muscles in her arm twisting, the blue eyes following the pebble, then flicking to him, and back to the pebble, the pout on her face slowly transforming to a mischievous smile... He sighed, right as a pebble hit him in the forehead.
"OW FUCK" Ladybug recoiled and clutched his head.
"OH MY GOD I HIT IT TOO HARD! CHAT ARE YOU OKAY?"
"Did you really hit the rock to hit me in the head?!"
"Yes?"
"That's incredible! But ow!"
"I'm sorry."
"Don't worry about it, sweets. It'll heal up once we get this akuma."
"Then what are we waiting for, Darling?"
XXXXXXXXXXX (Me confirmed for really like using pet names like darling and sweets and love i really like them they are fun a different one for every person in my life if possible is A1 top tier sorry this is so long)
The plaza was surrounded by media. They had been here for a day, with nothing to report except a rustling plastic bag. A few had come, a few more had left. The remaining were sitting around, nothing to do. There wouldn't be any story until the bag broke open or the heroes arrived. A light pair of taps echoed through the plaza, but no one turned.
"Hey! We're going to open the bag now!" The plaza paused for a moment, Chat Noire and Ladybug standing next to the bag, waiting. Then it boomed into motion, crews scrambling to cameras, anchors ruffling hair and drinking water. In a moment, the area was teeming with a tense energy. It reflected the heroes themselves. They turned to each other, nodded, and grabbed the rustling plastic bag.
"On three?" Hesitant green eyes met worried blue.
"Do you mean actually on three? Or like, three, then go. So four."
"I like the second one."
"Me too. Good luck, Ladybug. Do me proud."
"You too, Chat Noire."
After a breath, Ladybug counted.
"1…"
Hands tightened on the plastic.
"2…"
Adrenaline was soaring.
"3."
The bag opened.
XXXXXXXXXXX (these authors notes confirmed for ruining immersion into the story, sorry pals)