A/N Apologies again for the delay, I have very little writing time at the moment but I'm hoping to wind this up in a few more chapters so thanks for being patient (for those who are still hanging in there!). Thanks to all those who've reviewed and added to favourites – great to know people are actually reading!
Disclaimer – don't own Glee
Chapter 10
When Finn arrived at school that morning Puck was leaning against his truck, his casual stance belying the impatience he felt in waiting for his friend's arrival. The mohawked teen nodded innocently at Rachel as Finn parked up, then silently raised his hands in question as soon as the small diva turned her head to remove her seat belt. Finn merely shook his head, which prompted an exaggerated eye roll from the boy.
Rachel remained oblivious to the by-play, jumping down and closing the truck door as Santana's sleek BMW pulled up on the other side of them. Barely had the car came to a halt when Brittney leapt out of the passenger door, rushed over to embrace Rachel in a huge hug and squealed loudly as she kissed her on the cheek.
"Oh my God I can't believe you spent all weekend practising the cello," she enthused, "That is so awesome!"
Finn raised his eyebrows in surprise and confusion at the blonde's cryptic words and behaviour. He had no idea what she was talking about and totally would have written it off as Brittney being Brittney if it weren't for the reaction of everyone else around him. Puck, usually pretty smooth around the ladies, spontaneously snorted coffee out his nose, Rachel, always in control, turned bright red while she tried to stop the other girls exuberant speech and Santana deliberately looked at him, totally smirking at the confused expression on his face.
Yeah he wasn't super smart but something was definitely off. Firstly, Rachel didn't ever talk to Brittney and now they were acting like best friends (it wasn't an active dislike, more that Rachel found it too confusingly frustrating and a waste of time trying to maintain a conversation with her). Secondly, Rachel didn't play the Cello, didn't play any instrument, in fact was always saying that her voice was her instrument and why would she waste her time learning something that would always be inferior to her god given talents.
"What the hell's going on?" he said looking at everyone, "Am I missing something here?"
Puck smirked and rolled his eyes as Santana's jaw dropped. "Seriously? You cannot be that dumb…"
"Santana!" Rachel interjected sharply glaring at the other girl.
"Oh my God Berry," she replied laughing, "it's nothing to be embarrassed about – we all do it!"
"Yeah," intoned Brittney, "It's like the most fun you can have by yourself, except motocross which is pretty fun. Hey maybe I can teach you that next weekend since Santana's totally skilled you up on…."
"That sounds absolutely amazing" Rachel said loudly trying to cover the other girls words as she dragged her towards the school building and out of hearing range, "I've been dying to try it, whatever it is you do on those motorbike thingies…" Casting a glance over her shoulder she motioned with her head to Santana, pleading without words for her to follow them out of the potentially mortifying scenario that had just gone down. Santana pushed herself off the car fully intending to do just that when Puck stepped in front of her effectively halting her steps.
"Not so fast 'tana," he said casually.
Santana raised an eyebrow, but rather than attempting to follow the other girls she leaned back against her BMW, crossing her arms across her chest.
Finn looked totally confused, caught between Santana and Puck and the sight of his rapidly retreating girlfriend who kept looking over her shoulder in near panic at the three of them standing together.
When no-one spoke for a full minute Santana eventually shrugged with feigned innocence. "What?"
"You know what 'tana," Puck continued in his casual tone, "what the hell is going on with you and Berry?"
"Yeah," Finn interjected suddenly catching on, "and no more playing dumb, something's up and I want to know what it is."
Instead of replying, Santana carefully studied her nails as if she'd never heard them.
"Come on San ," Puck pleaded trying to appeal to her better nature, "we've both fucked around with their relationship enough already, don't you think we kind of owe it to them?"
"Ugh, fine," she groaned, "this is getting seriously old and I'd rather deal with Britt than you two dumbasses trying to play good cop, bad cop anyway."
The boys perked up, smiling smugly as she readjusted her position against the car.
When she was sure she had their full attention she looked them both in the eye and stated matter of factly, "I've been teaching her about sex."
There was a long minute of deathly silence when they both looked at each other and then back at her before exclaiming in unison, "What?"
"Our hot little Jewish princess wanted to learn about sex," she replied slowly as if she was spelling it out for a child. "And because I'm so awesome, I've been giving her lessons."
Finn stuttered slightly trying to get words out while Puck stood there stunned, jaw dropped and eyes slightly glazed at the revelation that what they'd both half-imagined and then dismissed, might actually be true.
Taking in their expressions before rolling her eyes and laughing she continued, "Oh my God, you guys are seriously pathetic. I'm not talking any girl on girl action here…."
"Good," Finn interrupted finally finding his words, "'cos I'm not cool with that. Rachel's my girl…"
"Just so you know," she interrupted pointing a finger at Finn, "I'm not intimidated by your macho territorialism bullshit and I totally would have tapped that if I'd wanted to."
"She shot you down didn't she?" Puck smirked.
Santana rolled her eyes crossing her arms across her chest again.
Finn licked his lips nervously, blown away by the revelation of Santana and Rachel's secret project. I mean it shouldn't have been a complete surprise that it was something like that given the way his girlfriend had been acting lately but why hadn't she mentioned anything to him? Part of him was kind of offended that she'd asked for advice from someone else; and going to Santana of all people was just plain weird. I mean they hated each other, he'd lost his virginity to her and she was a notoriously unsympathetic bitch who tortured people for fun. I mean Rachel was his girlfriend and she hadn't even told him she was ready to have sex, last time they'd talked about it she was gonna wait til she was 25. At that thought something clicked in his brain turning his thoughts from the why's and wherefore's to what it actually meant.
Oh….
"So does this mean that Rachel wants to have sex with me?" he asked slowly as if afraid of the answer.
Santana raised a brow in reply as if questioning the other girls's sanity. "yeah, surprised me too, didn't even change her mind after I told her just how awesome you were in the sack."
"Wow," he replied dumbfounded.
"Totally," she agreed sarcastically, "Just goes to show that love is blind and in Berry's case completely retarded as well."
"Cool it Santana" Puck warned as he watched his friend digest her words.
"So uh, what do you mean exactly 'teaching her about sex'?" he said eventually.
"What it sounds like Finntard – teaching her how to have good sex."
"Ok not to point out the obvious here Santana," Finn replied getting annoyed, "but shouldn't that be my job - you do know she is my girlfriend don't you?"
"Who came to me for expert advice."
"Bum steer I'd say," Finn replied eyes narrowing , "from memory you weren't that good…."
Puck snorted in the background, backing away slightly from the pair who now stood toe to toe staring each other down.
"Takes two to tango Fineptitude," Santana snarked, "''s a bit hard to perform miracles when your partners trying to break the land speed record for fastest lay. I can't rock your world if you can't rock mine."
"Yeah well it was my first time," he replied defensively.
"Can only use that excuse once Hudson," she answered smugly.
Finn rolled his eyes recalling the many reasons why he hated Santana lopez. "I just don't get it. Why would she come to you though?"
"Put it this way - what do you know about foreplay."
"Huh?"
"Foreplay," Santana repeated slowly, "you know that hour or so before the actual sex where you spend time getting everyone in the mood? You know that bit you skipped completely in the 5 minutes we spent in the Shady Glades last summer?"
"Oh right, like making out."
"I got this 'tana," Puck interrupted with a smirk, "Finn's my boy and it is my area of special expertise."
Santana snorted. "Get over yourself Puckerman – you learnt everything you know from me and a bunch of mom's."
"Hey!" he shouted offended.
"Seriously Puck – not to burst your bubble or anything, But it was totally like training a blind guide dog."
"So all those times you were screaming my name was 'cos I was waaaay off target," he smirked sarcastically.
"Duh….why do you think I ended up getting it pierced? I had to put a freakin' ring in it just so you could find it!"
Finn's eyes widened and he leant back from the two who were now nose to nose in front of him. "Seriously guys, this is like too much information. I may not know much but I'm good to work this out on my own."
"No you're not," they both replied in unison.
"I'm not?"
Both just shook their heads looking at him seriously. Santana pushed him back onto the car next to them getting right up in his face.
"And just so you know - you don't get into my girl Berry's panties until you can navigate your way around girl parts blindfolded."
"I…I don't?"
"No, You don't. I haven't wasted the last week skilling her up only for your bumbling ineptitude to totally screw it up."
"Okay," he replied wondering how this had suddenly become about him.
"This is how it is Finnocence - if you want your sex life with Rachel to last longer than ours did you needs to start doing some homework. Girls a perfectionist you know so she's gonna want something more than a horny teen with his training wheels still on."
Finn swallowed heavily as her words echoed what Rachel's father had said to him less than an hour ago. He hated to admit it but she was totally right. He had no idea what he was doing and Rachel expected and deserved the best in everything.
"Uh so what did you have in mind," he continued nervously as he slowly eased out from under the pointed finger pressed against his chest. "'cos I am not getting in bed with you again – I'm not down with that atall."
Santana snorted backing off a little, "Relax Frankenteen, it wasn't an invitation – I don't make the same mistake twice. My place, this afternoon, everybody keeps their clothes on."
And with that she turned and left dismissing both boys without another word.
"Can I come too?" Puck called after her to which she merely flipped the bird in reply. Finn smacked him on the arm frowning.
"What?" Puck replied palms raised in question, "I got nothin' on and I'm down for at least talking about sex if I ain't doin' it."
In the hallways of McKinley High, Rachel Berry huddled close to her locker absolutely mortified, trying hard not to think about what Puck, Finn and Santana could possibly be talking about in the car park.
And the day had started so well!
After her enlightening weekend she'd felt totally relaxed and confident when Finn had surprised her that morning, not at all bothered by the fact that she'd been all but naked in his arms at one point, his warm strong hands reaching new territory beneath her towel…..
Realising she was still in the middle of her high school corridor she shook herself of those warm thoughts, trying to focus on the bigger picture and not the image of Finn's hand on her bare backside. Truth be told, it had been kind of exciting. Barring the near miss with the not very carefully hidden fake phallus and her father's untimely reminder about house rules, she'd thought their tete-a-tete had gone remarkably well.
But now she wasn't so sure. Yes she was more comfortable with the concept of sex, of how to relax and enjoy those intimate moments with her boyfriend and was now looking forward at exploring those moments further. What she wasn't sure about was how Finn would take the revelation of her research methods. To be honest she hadn't thought this far when she'd asked Santana for advice, hadn't actually realised how comprehensive the other's girls tutelage would be. Although not dissatisfied with the end result, she had zero confidence in Santana's ability to be discrete; in fact she was quite certain the Latina would take any opportunity to reveal the truth for her own amusement. In fact was quite certain Finn would know every gritty detail by now…
Sighing she threw her books in her locker as the bell rang, giving up on the idea of catching him before their first class to try and explain herself. For once she wished they shared a few more classes than just Spanish, dreading the knowledge that she'd have to sit through two hours of wondering what he must be thinking before she'd have any chance of smoothing things over. Spotting him at the end of the hallway she took a step towards him then halted as her worst fears were confirmed. He looked at her, froze, dropped his eyes to the floor then promptly headed in the other direction; classic Finn avoidance behaviour.
All through her first two periods she toyed with her phone trying to come up with a light-hearted way of breaking the ice, problem was levity really wasn't her strong point. She was a drama queen through and through, joking about things wasn't really her way. Nor was letting things lie. Problems were to be dealt with head on, to be talked about, worked through until resolution whether Finn wanted to or not. Unfortunately his idea of dealing with a problem was more akin to an Ostrich's penchant for sticking its head in the sand. Whenever he didn't know how to deal with a situation, didn't know what to say to her, he just shutdown. She'd been there before, sometimes for days at a time, waiting (usually impatiently) till he worked through his feelings about whatever it was that had upset him.
And she was right. Finn pretty much avoided her for the rest of the day, the few times they made eye contact leading to a blush on his cheeks then causing a similar hue to grace hers. Texting got pretty much nowhere - she tried the light-hearted "missed you this morning – wanna meet up at lunch?" and didn't get a reply. The direct, "can we talk?" was met with similar silence, but at least the flirtatious, "come over this afternoon? my dad's will be home late…" got a brief response, not exactly what she'd been hoping for though. Staring despairingly at the vague 'can't today – got plans already' she was caught between anger and mortification – maybe their interlude this morning had meant more to her than it had to him? Or was he turned off by her sexually aggressive behaviour? Casting her mind back to a long-ago episode involving lots of lycra, a curling iron and an ill-timed Grease song, she realised it wouldn't be the first time.
Home alone after school she bolstered her resolve and dialled his cell number, jumping almost giddily on her bed when he answered, only to be disappointed when he hastily said he was kind of busy and he'd call her later. She wasn't sure but she was pretty sure she heard Puck in the background.
In despair she called Santana hoping to vent her frustration and get to the bottom of what had down that morning. She was equally as evasive and a lot more blunt in her reply. Assuring Rachel that not talking to Finn for the day was not a disaster, but actually a blessing, the Latina neatly avoided the question of what she had told the tall quarterback that morning by hanging up. Rachel rolled her eyes in frustration, something that was becoming a regular habit of late, before frowning in confusion; The laughter she could hear in the background she was pretty sure belonged to a certain mohawked teen.
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