a/n- from now on I will be in either Saphira or Arya's head. I will maybe do snip-its of Eragon but I don't understand him like I do some of the other characters. In this sense I've chosen to give you a quality story instead of a crappy not understood story.
Chapter 10
Arya's Secrets
Arya picked up her leather traveling cloths and put them on. She strapped her sword to her waste and slung her bow and quiver over her shoulder. She carried in her hand a pack filled with her things and some food for along the way. On the outside she was Arya, intelligent and indifferent. On the inside, though, she was slightly dismayed. What would happen if the egg didn't hatch was the reason she felt worried, she lied to herself. In truth, though, it was the fact that she'd be spending nearly a week alone with Eragon and he had never been good at being alone with her. Saphira would be some help, but she hadn't always been able to help him in previous times.
Arya opened her door and backed into the hallway shutting it. She turned to see almost walk straight into Vanir. She stopped herself and looked at him. He looked, odd.
"I have come to see you off and ensure you need no further protection than the dragon and her rider," he said.
Arya though about his offer, having another person there would greatly reduce the risk of either she or Eragon doing anything stupid. However she wasn't sure that Vanir's motives were quite as clean as she would have liked. She remembered the Hadarac Desert and made her decision.
"I think I can safely assure you that Eragon and I will be perfectly fine to travel in our small group. Besides, small groups attract less attention." She answered him and started on her way down the hall. She could hear him following but ignored it.
Saphira sat in the courtyard with saddle and bags already packed on her. Eragon had the sword she had given him out and was showing it to some children they had met yesterday. As she watched he swung the sword around in a complex movement attacking an invisible foe and the children all squealed with glee and tried to copy him with either sticks or nothing but an invisible sword. Most were sitting on the ground laughing by the time each one had tried it having tangled themselves up in their own limbs. Arya dropped her bag and ran forward to block one of Eragon's blows. She started to laugh and most everyone else joined in enjoying the carefree way of the moment. Arya backed away from Eragon and sheathed her sword. He nodded to her and did the same.
"Alright, it's time for me to leave," Eragon told the children.
"Don't go, Master Shadeslayer, won't you teach us how to do that?" a little boy of about seven asked looking disappointed.
"I'll tell you what. How about I teach you when I get back?" Eragon suggested.
"I suppose," The boy and the others ran away from them laughing and jeering as little boys do.
"I was waiting for you and as usual as Orik told me, there is no time for an elf to arrive, just always know that it's late," Eragon chuckled.
Arya laughed, and turned to get her bag. The contents had spilled over the ground and Vanir appeared to be picking it up. She opened her mouth to tell him she'd do it when he rose from the ground looking shocked. He was holding a piece of slate with his mouth slightly open. Arya closed her eyes. He was holding her fairth, the one of Eragon. Eragon began to step forward curiously. Arya saw disaster coming from this so she ran forward and took the fairth from Vanir's hand and dropped it into the bag.
"Next time you help clean up someone's things take care not to look at them," She hissed in Vanir's ear low enough for only him to be able to hear.
Arya walked back to Eragon feeling slightly worried at the outcome of this, "Let's go." She snapped as she passed Eragon.
Eragon looked bewildered but seemed to feel it was better not to ask. He jumped onto Saphira and offered Arya his hand though she didn't need it. She took it and jumped onto the dragon. Saphira took off into the Azure blue sky.
The sun had sunk far below to distant ridges that were the Spine by the time they landed that night. Arya lit the campfire in a small clearing while Eragon unpacked the bedrolls and food. Saphira lay curled just under the trees her tail and body curled like a cat's. She would have to be exhausted from her full day of flying. About midday they had hit a side wind that had blown them in a dangerous direction that would have taken them over some villages had is not died down. They were already off course and it was only the first day. Eragon hung a pot of water over the fire and lay back against Saphira's scaly side. Arya walked over and settled beside him her arms curled around her legs to protect her from the gathering cold. It would be winter in Alagaesia soon. In the northern parts of the kingdom there would already be snow. Du Weldenvarden would have an icy white shimmered of the faint blanket of snow that they got during this time of year.
She smiled sadly remembering Faolin taking her into the forest to show her a deer that barely stood out against the snow of its clearing. She remembered reaching out to the deer and feeling it's free wild mind near hers. It surprised her she could think of Faolin so easily now. It still pained her but she did not cry as she usually did. Now she realized in a few days it would have been a year. She would have to explain Foalin to Eragon too.
"It's so peaceful out here. I'd forgotten how much I loved the wild," Eragon sighed.
"As did I," Arya agreed watching the sparks from the campfire twist into the sky and join with the stars so they looked like red orange meteors, "For an elf to forget what it is like to be so free is shameful."
"The traders would be on their way to Carvahall no. They would have left Therinsford. They'll find nothing to trade with but wild animals," Eragon sounded on the verge of withdrawing again.
Arya reached her hand over to him and laid it on his arm. He looked up at her surprised. She felt her heart jump again as it always did when they made eye contact. She blinked.
"Roran…" Eragon stopped as his voice caught in his throat, "told me he left some people up in the spine, do you think we could…?" he asked hesitantly, trailing off.
"I wouldn't mind if Saphira doesn't." Arya told him. She knew they would be expected in Osilon in a few days but the people of Carvahall were like Eragon's family. It was worth a few days to help them
Eragon smiled at her for a second and then looked at her curiously, "What was the picture on the fairth anyway? Why did Vanir seem so shocked? I have to admit it made me laugh a bit but I've never seen an elf other than you show such open shock."
Arya withdrew her hand and folded it back around her knees, "It's personal. No one was supposed to see it other than me. I was keeping it with me for that reason." Arya felt extremely uncomfortable discussing the fairth with its subject.
"May I see it?" He asked.
Fear and Annoyance flashed through Arya, "No, you may not!" She snapped.
Eragon seemed to sense he had touched a nerve, for he was silent for sometime.
"I'm sorry I didn't mean to be so presumptuous. Yesterday you said you needed a friend. You said you had things to tell me and explain to me. Do you want to talk now?" he asked.
Arya considered him for a moment. He seemed genuinely concerned. She looked him straight in the eyes and realized that he could here her out and the sooner she was able to tell someone the better.
"You'll have to be patient with me. It will be hard for me to explain if you interrupt. When I'm done you may say whatever you want. You'll have to understand how hard this is for me alright," She told Eragon.
He nodded.
"I have two things to tell you. One is about Faolin and one is about my recent imprisonment. Which do you want me to start with?" She asked.
"I'd like to hear about Faolin," he replied.
"Faolin, was my companion for a long time before we were assigned to protect the egg. Glenwing was one of Faolin's good friends though I personally did not know much about him. Faolin and I had actually been best friends since I was a child. You see, he was a little older than me, so, as a child, I looked up to him. Then we were adults though barely and we were pitted together in the Varden's quest. Though my mother had disowned me she could not stand to let anything happen to me so she sent two of her best warriors with me. These two warriors happened to be Faolin and Glenwing. While we traveled Faolin taught me all he knew. He had already trained me in swordsmanship and defense. He soon had me using a bow perfectly. We spoke at night when our traveling was done and we learned more and more about each other. We became closer to each other with each passing moment reveling in the fact that the other existed as each other's friend, and though at the time, still young, we did not realize our love for each other. I don't think Faolin ever realized it until right before he died. I realized it the day before. Then everything was taken away from me in the blink of an eye. One unexpected incident took the lives of my two friends," Arya paused to let the meaning of what she was saying sink in, "After that nothing seemed important to me but protecting the egg and doing my duty and that is exactly what I did. Until quite recently I still gried whenever I thought of that night and of all the time Faolin and I could have been together had we seen it sooner but we didn't."
Arya looked over at Eragon to see how he would react to what she had told him, "You asked me once about Faolin so I thought you deserved to know."
"Thank you for telling me this. I'm glad you thought that I deserved to know," Eragon's voice was taught and controlled.
Suddenly, Arya realized how much it must hurt him to hear this. She reached out to him but he pulled his hand out of her reach. She sighed.
"I have more to tell you. This is the hardest part. I don't know whether I can explain the whole thing to you but you asked me once what was done to me in Helgrind and you deserve an explanation for hat as well," she paused and took a breathe before starting, "Eragon nothing like this has ever happened to me before. I would much rather have died than had it happen to me. I am more ashamed of it than I am of many things. This is one secret that you must keep to yourself. Don't mention it unless I tell you otherwise, and especially do not mention it inside any elven settlement. The elves already do not have a high opinion of me I would not want their perspectives pulled any lower," Arya paused again hoping Eragon understood how desperately she wanted this not to be known, "Eragon, do you remember in Gilead when Durza told his soldiers to use me as they wanted? I had the strength then to keep myself safe. It was not the same in Helgrind. I was drugged so heavily I doubt I would have been able to use magic to defend myself from a rabbit if the need arose. The day you came for Katrina, I had been tortured beyond my previous limits. I don't know what kept me from dying. Your brother did all of this to me. Then that morning he came into my cell suggesting a new kind of torture. He knocked me to the floor, put a knife to my throat, and…" Arya paused as a flood of terrifying memories surge through her body sending chills up her spine and made her shiver, "…and he raped me. Not once but, several times." She finished speaking quietly.
Arya closed her eyes and shuddered again. The she looked up at Eragon. He was not looking at her but at the fire. He stood and walked to one of the bedrolls where he grasped a blanket and returned to her his fiery eyes filled with anger and compassion. He wrapped the blanket around her shoulders the looked at her a most curious expression on his face.
"Your not… are you?" Eragon asked disjointedly.
It took Arya a few moments to comprehend his meaning.
"I mean, if you were I'd take responsibility for it," He said awkwardly, "It wouldn't be perfect but, it would be better than the alternative, and…"
Arya laid a hand on Eragon's arm to stop him from continuing, "There is no worry, I'm not."
Eragon looked relieved, and Arya sighed and looked away from him. She felt slightly odd after having such a conversation. Eragon took her hand and a strange thrill jolted through her at the contact. Her heart was beating twice as fast as it normally did.
"I am truly sorry for what you had to go through. Something such as that is so cruel. I know I will never be able to understand the pains this has caused you, but you have my sympathies." He said.
Arya looked up at him and caught his eyes. She could not move or breathe or do anything for that matter. She didn't think before she acted. She closed her eyes as Eragon leaned toward her, her heart racing at a speed she would have thought would have killed her. He pressed his lips against hers. Arya couldn't pull away nor did she want to. For those next few seconds she admitted to herself that she loved him. She felt one of his arms pull her closer to him and one of his hands behind her head. She put her arms around his neck not wanting this to end. He pulled her even closer. Her body was pressed against his now. Then, she realized what she had done and slid away from him.
Arya stood her cheeks flushed with color and walked to her bedroll. She settled down on the blankets trying to calm her heartbeat. She looked up at Eragon to see him sitting against Saphira looking confused. A few small tears rolled down her cheek and fell onto the ground before she regained control of her emotions.
I'm sorry Eragon, but this cannot be. I was caught up by my own terrors and seeking for a way out. I'm sorry for leading you on like that. She told him.
With that she, retired to her bedroll permanently.
a/n- Hahaha, you actually thought I'd make her confess her undying devotion to him after that didn't you. If you didn't then your smarter than me. I actually thought I was going to make her confess her undying devotion to him until I wrote it and decided it seemed very inappropriate for the circumstances. I'm sorry if my kissing scene was a little rough.
Gath un riesa du rakr,
Tabitha of MoonAurora