Chapter 10

Harry didn't go to bed he walked for a while in a daze. A weapon then … yes and no … good work … circumstances … safety … save Mr. Weasley's life … Cedric.

Tears boiled over and ran down his face. Rising a hand, he attempted to brush his weakness away but they were only to be replaced by more tears, more pain, and more weakness. Harry ran down the hall; he had to stop the tears somehow. He had to stop being weak, had to grow up. He had to become the weapon Dumbledore so desperately needed. He had to impress him. 'This is not about Harry's feelings.' So he had to get a stronger push in the right direction, then he could be what Dumbledore wanted.

Harry reached some toilets, not really knowing where he was, and ran in so fast he felt sure the door would come of. Pulling out the knife he kept in his pocket, he pulled up his sleeve tears still running down his face. He pulled the knife up his arm, hissing at the pain he inflicted on himself, and the blood that came forth from the slashed arm. 'Rid yourself of agony. It will make you stronger. Live with pain. It will make you who your meant to be.' Soon the cuts came faster and there were more cuts than ever before; deeper than ever before.

The blood pooled on the floor. That blood, the symbol of him, pain and suffering, the never-ending anguishes of his life, the people he left behind and let down. The blood that looked the same as any other blood but kept him so apart form the rest of society. The blood that is ever flowing, his life that's never changing, the never-ending coming and going of the people that really seemed to matter. Life's constant unfairness.

And he craved it. As injustice craved his life. They were one and the same just like the blood, his blood,

The door open.

Harry turned to see Draco was there. Staggering to his feet Harry tried to say 'you,' but all that came out was a bundle of slurred and incoherent syllables. He tried again only to fail in much the same way as the last.

'Harry! No.' Draco moved forward, but Harry swung away, shaking his head. All his movements were wild and exaggerated things you would expect if someone were drunk. All Draco could guess was that Harry was hysterical. Harry stared laughing, and through bouts of laughter, managed to slur: 'No Draco. I…' He said punching his chest. 'Deserve this … need this. It will make me strong.' The laughter stopped after that and Harry adopted a stubborn look. 'Dumbledore will like me again.' His expression changed again and he now looked sad and lost. 'He will have his weapon.'

Draco moved forward and cupped Harry's cheek. Then, thinking better of it placed them on his shoulders. 'Weapon, Harry?'

'He wants a weapon!' he said, giggling again as if he was a child and had just imparted on a great secret. 'I will be it!' he whispered again leaning forward, only to stagger falling on to Draco, grabbing hold of his shoulders.

Draco slid his hands down Harry's arms, smearing Harry's blood on his own hands. Reaching Harry's hands, Draco pulled the knife out of his hand. 'Why do you want him to like you so much?'

'Because he's all I have left…' he said sadly. Saying this, his eyes fluttered closed, and Draco, seeing that Harry had calmed down, looked down at his wrists. The cuts were deep and, if they were not tended to, they could be fatal. If he healed them, however, they would most likely be OK. He knew that this image of Harry would haunt his dreams forever and, taking in the whole picture, tried to swallow back the tears that were threatening to fall. But a bloody hand reached out and whipped away one stray tear and left behind a stick mark under his eye.

'You really care, don't you? Why?' But before Draco could reply to that, Harry's hand fell away from his face and his body crumpled. Draco managed to grab Harry around the waist preventing Harry from hitting the cold floor. Draco looked at Harry, his back arched away from him, his head lolling back displaying his pale neck. Draco pulled Harry to him and rested Harry's head on his shoulder.

'Because I love you.' He whispered and in one fluid moment, gracefully reached down and picked up Harry's legs and, carrying him bridle style, left the toilets.

What should he do with Harry? Take him to the infirmary even thought he had promised not to tell anyone? 'OK, well of course Harry's health come first before anything else… OK, here's what to do. Heal the wounds and if he is stable, leave it. If his not, take him to the hospital wing.' Draco headed to a room he knew of, not far from where he was standing.

Harry was incredible light and small; no wonder he made such a good seeker. But, this wasn't normal. He was too light. This was malnourishment.

Draco reached the room before he could finish his thought. Whispering the password, the door swung open to admit them. It was a small room with a double bed pushed up against the wall. Draco laid Harry on the bed and, using a wand cleaned the cuts he couldn't heal because they were too big. He tore one of the sheets into stripes using his wand, and began to rap them tightly around Harry's wrists. Once he was finished, he pulled a blanket up over Harry in case he got cold, and left the room.

He was apprehensive to leave Harry alone in case he woke up. Draco wanted to be there and give Harry a long lecture. However, he had to clean up the toilets before any one noticed the mess. 'And anyway, Harry's not likely to wake up for a while anyway.' Draco mused. Turning back to Harry before he left, Draco bent over and placed a soft, innocent kiss on Harry's forehead. It sent a tingling sensation up his spine and through his lips. Draco couldn't help but smile. Draco was amazed if a simple kiss on the forehead could do that what would a full on kiss be like. Trying not to get too excited, Draco left the room. He was a Slytherin after all. He couldn't get all-gooey over kiss.

'Oh my God… what have I done? I don't want to die! I have to kill Tom Riddle.' Harry was floating in nothing. It was black all around him and it was thick and heavy and clung to his lungs. 'I don't want to die.' He closed his eyes. 'I don't want to die. I don't want to die. I don't want to die.'

Suddenly the air became lighter and the darkness became lighter, the sort of darkness you have when you have your eyes closed in a well-lit room. He felt the softness on his back that he was lying on. He wasn't weightless anymore and he suddenly realised that he was back in his body on a bed.

Sitting up right, his breath coming in sharp bursts, he realised that he was hyperventilating from the shock of the whole situation. Suddenly, something touched him on the shoulder and Harry jumped and flinched away from it.

'Hey, Harry. It's me, Draco.' Harry seemed to relax a bit at the voice and stopped hyperventilating, but began to shake violently.

'I didn't want to die … I thought I was going to die.'

'Shush … shush' whispered Draco pulling Harry into a hug. 'It's OK. It will be OK.'

'I only wanted to cause pain.' Draco pulled away cupping Harry's face in his hands.

'Why?'

'Because… I have to be strong'

'But you are strong.'

'Not strong enough for Dumbledore.'

'Earlier you talked about a weapon?' Draco asked trying to understand. Harry took a deep breath. He wasn't sure why he was going to tell Draco, but somehow, it just felt right. 'Maybe it was because he just saved your life?' Harry mused.

'After the poisons incident, I went to Dumbledore and Snape came, too. Anyway, outside Snape and Dumbledore had a conversation. Snape asked if I was a weapon and Dumbledore said 'yes and no' He said that… I was more than a weapon. That I have to be neutered' Harry had tried to keep his emotions in check, but his voice broke. Taking a deep breath, he continued. 'That I had to be encouraged down the right path. He manipulated me, Draco… Used me!'

'He's not important, Harry.'

'How can you say that? Of course he is!'

'Why? Why is he so important? He nothing but an old fool.'

'Don't talk about him like that! He's all I've got left. Hermione and Ron don't want to know me anymore.'

'I never liked those two. They're both fucking idiots'

'Hey!' Harry said getting angry and pulling away 'I won't have you talk about them like that.'

'Why do you keep sticking up for them when they treat you like a piece of shit?!' Asked Draco getting upset about the turn the conversation took.

Harry looked down at his lap. 'Because they're my friends…'

'They don't deserve to be you friends! You're to good for them.' Harry looked up, shocked. Then, seeing the sincerity in Draco's face, blushed and looked down again, letting his bangs cover his face.

Draco felt his breath catch in his throat. God, he was beautiful. And before Draco knew what he was doing, he bent down and placed a chaste kiss on Harry plump red lips. Draco was surprised by what he did but even more surprise when Harry didn't pull away. Instead, his eyes fluttered closed. Taking this as a sign to continue, Draco crushed their lips together. This kiss was so different form any other kiss he had had. This was amazing nothing seemed to matter anymore; it was just Harry and he. Their lips moving together as if they were dancing, Draco's lips boldly trying to conquer Harry's, while Harry somewhat coyly tried to fight back, as if he wasn't going to let Draco get the better of him. Harry, however, really had no idea what he was doing and slowly let Draco take control.

Harry had never been kissed before. He didn't he didn't know what to expect nor how to react but this was just… wow! He tried to partake in the kiss but then found that it was just easier to let Draco take control. Then it hit him. DRACO!! Coming to his senses, Harry pulled way from the flushed blonde.

'What was that?' Harry said, jumping to his feet and backing away, feeling dizzy from the loss of blood but not about to go back to the bed. Not while he was sitting there.

'Look! Harry! Sorry!' Draco said raising his arms.