Alright so I'm updating this as a double post. I want to update this story along with me and Dragongirl323's story Together in Darkness (go check it out and please leave a review if you like and want to) so every TWO WEEKS, I'll be updating this story and the new one. Well, you might get it earlier if we have both chapters up before the two weeks are up but that all depends. So please be patient but for now, here is the new chapter that my beta, Dragongirl323, edited for you guys. She has made an exceptional job helping me with this and I am grateful for all the changes she makes and helps with it.

So now, read and review please!

Disclaimer = I don't own Twilight!

Chapter 9

Guilty nightmares

Alice's Point of View

Darkness… The only thing surrounding me was darkness. Not even a patch of light existed to guide my way. Where was I? I spun around, trying to find some light in this never ending blackness, which was only a waste of time. There was nothing but inky blackness. I tried marching through the shadows, my arms held up in front of me in case I ran into anything, hoping to find a way out, but knowing that there was none. It simply seemed as though I was walking in place… not going anywhere.

That is, until someone appeared in front of me, illuminated by a single beam of light above them.

As I slowed to a standstill, my eyes fully took in who was in front of me. It was Bella, standing there in a plain black V neck shirt and dark jeans. In one hand, she held my purse and, in the other, a golden locket. From afar, it was difficult to analyse what the necklace looked like, but it was clearly obvious what this scene was. This was the day Bella had 'framed' me at school; the day when I began to doubt her true intentions.

It was also the day that I broke my sister's heart… well, part of it anyway.

Walking slowly toward her, I felt my heart reach out to her. It had been days since she'd gone missing and everyone was trying their hardest to find any sort of lead. Of course, every single search came up empty but we weren't about to give up. As we gazed into one another's eyes, I tried to understand the meaning of this. Why was she here, especially with those objects in her hand? Why go back to that first heartbreak?

My feet stopped and planted themselves firmly not far from her. Suddenly, words began flowing from my throat out of their own accord, unwillingly being spoken. "How dare you do that to me? What'd I ever do to you?" How was this happening? Why couldn't I control my speech patterns? It was as if my entire body was taken over by the darkness surrounding us.

Bella simply kept staring at me, not saying a word. The darkness seemed to thicken with the silence surrounding us as Bella remained quiet for several moments, just like when we first had this conversation. As the silence became uncomfortable, unintentional anger seemed to boil within me, just like before. This was exactly like déjà-vu. Whatever this was, it was only a recollection of the first moment that I broke my sister's heart.

And the next words spoken would only make things worse.

"You're not my sister anymore. I doubt you even know the meaning of the word! Stay away from me." It seemed as though my words inflicted more damage than the first time. As I was looking at Bella, a small crack formed in her chest, almost like a spider web expanding and going in every direction. With everything that had happened in Bella's life, from the moment her mother died to now, no one could truly realize how those words really did hurt her in unimaginable ways.

As the cracks slowly expanded, Bella's gaze fell down to the floor behind me, which made me slightly curious as to what she could be looking at. After reluctantly shifting my gaze behind me, my mouth fell open in shock. My mother was lying on the floor, crumpled in a pool of her own blood with a hand clutching her stomach. Blood spurted from under her frail hand and trailed down to the black floor, now quickly becoming red and leaking on my shoes.

Rushing over to her, I knelt in the puddle of blood and tried to stop the bleeding—which, of course, I was unable to do. I was only capable of watching the life quickly leave my mother's body as Bella stood watch over us both. Turning my head sharply to look at my sister, another spark of fury ignited within me and my legs straightened, quickly lifting me from the floor. I knew what was going to happen next, but—just like before—my body seemed to be moving of its own accord. I tried pleading with it, urging my legs to stop moving, but nothing worked. I was a passenger within my own mind. And, as Bella and I stood one in front of the other, my hand quickly shot up and collided roughly with her cheek, making the cracks form even more across her body, almost to the point where she could break at any second.

Why couldn't this nightmare end?!

"Why are you just standing there? Don't you care about her? Mom's dying and you're just standing there doing nothing!" I screamed unintentionally, wanting nothing more than to stop this and help Bella instead of destroying her. Bella's head mechanically turned back toward me, the crack in her neck growing more with each subtle movement. When she remained quiet, my hands shot out once more to grasp her shoulders—even against my will—and they began shaking her roughly, the anger within me boiling over.

"She cared about you more than anyone! And you're letting her die!"

And, just as the word 'die' was uttered, Bella shattered under my grasp, breaking into hundreds of pieces and flying through the gust of wind that suddenly appeared out of nowhere. Losing my balance slightly, I watched as my sister's fragments blew away out of my reach.

What had I just done…?

"Bella…?" I whispered, turning around in every possible direction, hoping to see her reappear somewhere in the darkness. But, out of false hope, there was still nothing around me. There was just the blackness that threatened to engulf me completely, nothing more and nothing less. "Bella…? Bella, where are you? Please, I'm sorry! Please come back!" I screamed, trying to run in the direction Bella's shattered pieces flew away, but once again, it seemed as though I was running in place.

Knowing that running would do no good, I stopped and tried to find some opening in this unending darkness, only to find the shadows beginning to coil around me, slowly encompassing my feet and slithering up my body. I tried struggling against the cold and empty darkness, but it was no use. Soon, I would be wrapped in this substance, choking on the hatred I used to feel towards Bella.

The shadows had now wrapped around nearly all of my body and were slowly moving up my neck when suddenly, a man's voice rang out in the darkness, only making my blood run ice cold—well, let's just say colder than it already was.

"She'll die knowing that you all hate her!" were the last words I heard before the shadows covered my mouth, nose and ears, moving up to my eyes and completely engulfing me.

NO!

I shot up in my bed, panting as sweat trickled down my neck and forehead. My hands were balled into tight fists, gripping the sheets so tightly that my knuckles were turning white. Tears were slowly forming in the corners of my eyes and running down my cheeks, fusing together with the sweat. Glancing around the room, the realization began to set in and my mind finally comprehended that what had just happened was all just a horrible nightmare.

Closing my eyes, I tried to wipe the tears away but they wouldn't stop falling. It had been such a compelling nightmare that the memory of Bella's form drifting away kept eating at me. Everything that I had told her, everything that had been done to her, only pushed my sister farther away from us—which only increased the guilt that had never ceased to diminish since she disappeared.

Looking over at the clock, I could tell that it was still the middle of the night. But even with that knowledge in mind, it didn't help that my mind felt wide awake and my trembling body could not calm down enough to go back to sleep.

No, I could never go back to sleep now. My mind was already all over the place and my emotions were getting the better of me. Knowing that my sister might be dead or alive out there, partly because of me, it only made me feel even worse. It only made the thought of losing her forever burn hotter in my mind. Some part of it because of me but mostly, it was because of James, the one who had taken her. He manipulated her and made us hate her because of his need to play these sick, twisted games…

She'll die knowing that you all hate her!

"It's my fault…" I whispered to myself as the tears flowed once more down my cheeks, dripping onto my pyjamas as my fists clung tighter to the sheets. "Part of this is my fault… I should have been there for her… I should have helped her… But instead, I… I… And because of all of that, she… Bella might… " But I couldn't finish that sentence. It was too horrible to even think it, much less speak it out loud. More tears began falling as I closed my eyes and hung my head in shame. "I'm so sorry, Bella… I'm so sorry…"

With this overpowering guilt eating away at me, I wrapped my arms around my knees and brought my legs to my chest, rocking myself softly while silently sobbing apologies to my sister, knowing that she could not hear them now.

Bella's Point of View

Darkness… The only thing surrounding me was darkness. Not even a patch of light existed to guide my way. Where was I? I looked around, trying to find some sort of opening in this never-ending darkness but there didn't seem to be one. I started walking, hoping that the darkness would somehow end, but, after what seemed like hours, hopelessness flowed through me and I knew that the darkness wouldn't subside.

But suddenly, a figured appeared out of nowhere.

It was Alice, standing before me with a murderous glare in her eye and Rosalie positioned directly beside her. Unlike Alice's perfect skin, Rosalie's was battered and bloody. There were cuts on her face and her left arm was by her side, bent in an unnatural angle to show that it was broken. This was how she looked when we met Rosalie at the hospital after the accident…

Yes, Rosalie was bloody and glaring but Alice's glare was even worse, if that were imaginable considering that Alice never got mad—or at least this enraged.

"How dare you do that to me? What'd I ever do to you?You're not my sister anymore. I doubt you even know the meaning of the word!" she exclaimed, and it felt like my heart was giving out once more. It was bad enough hearing it once, but this… this was simply torture. Luckily, Rosalie didn't utter a word, which might have been for the best at this moment.

I began backing away from them, but was stopped by someone behind me. Turning abruptly, my feet stumbled walked backwards while my eyes scanned the person in front of me. But what I saw made my heart stop in more ways than one. Edward, with his beautifully muscular arms crossed over his chest, turned his gaze down to me and a cold shiver shot down my spine as his cold eyes met mine. Taking a few steps back, I stared at the one who used to be my one true love and tried to find some sign of that love coming from him, but none remained.

This was not the Edward I knew.

"The moment you said to me that I shouldn't be near you, I didn't listen. But I should have. Maybe it would have saved me from this heartbreak now," he said, venom dripping from every word uttered out of his mouth. His words—once again, spoken from that horrible day in the parking lot, like a nightmarish déjà-vu—felt like a dozen stabs to the heart that would never heal. Already that Alice's words affected me, but this was Edward. Anything he said or did could affect me, good or bad. "My only regret was loving you, Bella Swan."

And those last eight words were my undoing.

"Edward, I…" I looked to my left, finding Emmett and Jasper standing beside one another, arms folded across their chests with the most hateful expressions I had ever seen. To my right, Carlisle stood behind Esme, his hands curled softly around her shoulders as Esme's stomach kept bleeding. Her bullet wound… The one James had caused because I was disobedient.

The red substance staining her shirt was very alarming, but what shocked me worse than the wound was the disappointed that they both held written across their faces. Since they've known me, all I've seen is appreciation and kindness from them but now, it was all gone.

My hope to ever be a part of the Cullen family again was gone forever.

"Esme, Carlisle. Please, I can explain…" I wanted to beg them to let me back in but seeing their hateful expressions made me close my mouth and cut my sentence short.

Just as I began turning around to try and explain myself to everyone before me, they all disappeared into the darkness. Turning around frantically, my eyes detected that there was no one around me; only me and the darkness. I stopped turning, knowing there was no one around, but suddenly, I found myself face to face with Siobhan, Liam and Maggie, all of them wearing an expressionless face that showed that they weren't angry towards and neither were they me happy. They just held blank stares.

"Siobhan…? Maggie…? Liam…? What are you all doing here?" I asked, having the feeling that they would not be answering me anytime soon. And my feeling turned out to be right; they just continued staring at me. Siobhan held Maggie's left shoulder with one hand while Liam held the other with his; one happy family. "What's going on here? What's—"

Just as I began to ask more questions, a sharp pain erupted in my chest and I was sent flying backwards into a solid wall, my head cracking against the shadows with such force that stars began to dance before my eyes. Looking down at the area of numbing pain, I saw a large crowbar sticking out of my chest, blood seeping from the wound profusely. My hands and legs began to stain with the red substance as my eyes darted slowly back to the Connolly family, who now stood in front of the Cullens. They were all the people I cared about but I couldn't reach them.

Reaching a cold and shaking hand out towards them, I tried removing the crowbar from my bleeding chest with no result. The strength was fading quickly from my body and there was nothing that could save me now. Out of nowhere, James began to slowly walk toward the Connollys and the Cullens, holding a knife in his hand with a wicked grin plastered on his face. No… not him. Anyone but him.

"No… S… Stay away from them…" I tried to shout, but the words got stuck in my throat.

My vision began to blur as James' faint laugh echoed through the darkness. "I told you, Bella. If you were to ever disobey me, they would suffer the price. They would die by my hands as you watched helplessly," he said before raising his knife and slicing it through the air, cutting everyone I cared about. I could only watch as they all fell to the floor, one on top of the other and staining the blackness with their blood. I tried feebly to reach out toward them with my shaking hand, but it was no use. I was stuck to the wall, the life draining right out of me, as James approached me, bloody knife in hand and laughing maniacally. "You can't win, my dear Bella. I'll find you, and when I do, you will wish that you had never been born…"

As James' laugh echoed louder through the shadows, my hand limply fell to my side as my vision faded, letting the darkness consume me.

I'm so sorry everyone… Please forgive me… That was my last thought before James' face filled my peripheral view and the darkness overtook me completely.

I woke up with a sharp gasp, breathing heavily, sitting up quickly in my bed when trying to catch my breath. Looking swiftly down at my chest, I patted it with my hand, trying to find the hole where the crowbar penetrated, but there was nothing, not even dried blood to prove that my nightmare was real.

Closing my eyes, my hand fell limply to my side and a shaky breath escaped my lips. It was only a dream… They're still alive. At least, I hope so… I thought as I ran my fingers through my moist hair.

That was the hope that I tried to keep within my heart for the past few weeks. I'd given up everything so that they could be safe but now, seeing Siobhan and her family in my dream made me wonder if staying here was a good idea. They were willing to give me shelter but at what cost? James could easily find me and take what he wants, putting an end to anyone that gets in his way, even the Connollys…

He won't stop until he destroys me for good.

A few questions kept ringing through my mind as I lay back in my bed, looking at the ceiling before turning my gaze toward the wooden attic door. What if no one was safe? What if he would never stop…? What if all of my efforts were in vain, that James would have found a way to get to the Cullens and hurt them because I disobeyed him?

No, I would feel it if something happened to them, to Edward. A part of me would feel it. I would know if something wasn't right…

As I closed my eyes, knowing that sleep would not come back to me easily, I simply stared at the darkness behind my eyelids and told myself that, even if they all hated me now, I would know if the other half of my heart—the one I had left with Edward—was gone forever.

So what did you all think? Good? Bad? Please let me know in some reviews! It would be really appreciated!

Mortal-paralight20

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