What A Long Hard Life: Bless' Story

Chapter 10: Hopelessness

Reached the 10 chapter mark.

The children were fully grown and stopped ageing like Bless. They were all like her now, teenagers forever, never to grow old or weak, unaware of the suffering they would endure later on in their lives.

Now that they were older and competent of looking after themselves, they had a choice of leaving the shelter. Not surprisingly, but to Heathers horror, they had decided to leave. They wanted to see the world, the real world and go on adventures of their own.

They all left, to find partners of their own and carry on the family. Shade and Heather were worried about them all, but they couldn't stop it from happening.

The shelter was silent for the first time in many years. But it didn't feel good. It felt lonely and out of place. Bless was all alone in her immortality, the only one who looked like Shadow once again.

She wondered if it would stay like this forever or if at least one of them would return. Their parents had brought them up so well and they had just left without a goodbye. That was how fed up they were with their life underground. Even the ruined world outside was better for them.

Bless hoped that she could sleep easy that night, no more noise, no more snoring from the others. It was just Shade and Heather. The triplets had gone, they had found somewhere else to go, after being annoyed by the children when they were younger. So it was just the three of them. She hoped that they would spend time together as friends now that it was just the three of them and Shade and Heather were more grown up now.

When she fell asleep and entered her dream world, she was wrong. That night would not be any easier. Her memories and imaginary father still haunted after all of these years. He continued to hurt and tease her, mock and taunt her and every time she would beg for mercy, on her knees, begging for him to stop and leave her alone.

Shadow just sneered and tormented her even more. "Why are you begging for mercy? I'm just treating you the way you treated me." He hissed. (Thanks for this wonderful idea CoraRoz.) "You always treated me like crap… all because I had you as a child… it wasn't my fault! It's not like I wanted you to be born!"

Bless cried out in despair, was this all her fault? Did Shadow really feel that way about her? She was just an unwanted accident to him, is this why he never really returned to them?

She was suddenly awoken by Shade, who was shaking her awake. She noticed that he looked very annoyed. "Bless… you need to tell me about these dreams, it's the only way you're going to stop having them." he said in a frustrated voice.

"I'm not telling you anything… it's private." Bless said, refusing to talk or look at him.

"But it's disturbing us Bless! We were sleeping wonderfully before you started screaming again!" Shade yelled.

"Get out! You're no good for me!" Bless screamed and pushed him out, she slammed the door and leaning against it so that he couldn't come back inside. She couldn't take it any more, she felt like everyone was against her. She now truly hated her immortality, she wanted to end her life immediately. She felt that there was really no point in living on.

Once she was sure that Shade was gone, she ran out of her bedroom door, to the exit of the shelter, burst out and ran off into the distance, planning on never coming back.

She was now exposed to the outside world, something she hadn't seen in over a decade. Instead of masses of rubble where she was now, it was a long range or flat ground, it had been cleared, so was easy to walk across, however there was no where to hide if she saw a GUN soldier.

She was under the risk of being caught by GUN, but she didn't care. She felt the despair take over her and fell to her knees, giving up completely. She collapsed onto the ground completely, feeling her muscles give up and her life draining away.

She once again found herself in her dreams, Shadow was there, smirking. "Just giving up like that isn't going to end it you know… nothing will… believe me… I've tried so many times." he teased, walking over to her and grabbing her arms to pick her up. "It'll never end… you're going to have to endure an eternity of pain and misery… now deal with it!" he yelled at her.

For once, Bless didn't cry. She just gave a look of pure hate, holding back the tears as she felt the emotional pain physically cripple her. She fell to her knees once again. She felt as if her insides were being ripped apart in her chest… she wanted it all to end. On her hands and knees she started to beg. "Please… just kill me now… I can't take this any more… please…" she begged and started to sob.

"No… I want to see you suffer…" Shadow hissed, looking down on her as if she were a pile of rubbish. "You were an idiot to leave the safety of your home… you're definitely going to get captured now." he said confidently.

"I don't care… let them capture me…" Bless said, not sounding bothered. "I'm nothing to everyone now… so I might as well do everyone a favour and never go back…"

"Finally… you think correctly…" Shadow said, smirking malevolently. Bless felt the dream world slipping away again, she felt as if she was being picked up and carried away. She heard Shadow's evil laugh fade away as this was happening.

In her mind she was panicking, this was it. She'd been captured. She opened her eyes, expecting to see herself in the arms or a GUN soldier, but she didn't. She saw that it was Shade instead. She gave a groan, to was too weak to talk, her body still numb from the despair.

"You're stupid for running away Bless… you could have been captured… I could have lost you…" he said sadly as her carried her back as quickly as he could. "I know things have been bad between us lately but… you can't just run off thinking that you're unwanted…" he said and got back into the shelter.

Bless didn't listen though, she was lost in her depressed thoughts, feeling herself go limp again. Shade brought her to her room and put her down on her pillows and blankets gently. "Bless… stop this now… please… you're worrying me." Shade said, thinking her weakness was all just an act so she could get what she wanted. But she didn't stop, it was as if she was oblivious to her surroundings. She was just staring into space, no expression on her face at all. There was no movement from her either, it was if she were dead.

Shade shook her gently, and she looked at him for second then went back to her trance. This reminded Shade of how Shadow, his dad, acted sometimes, and how Maria had said that he got depressed sometimes. "Oh no… Bless… what's wrong with you? Is this my fault for neglecting you? I didn't realise you were this much like dad… I'm so sorry…" he said and broke down crying, wishing she would snap out of her weak and dejected state.

It took a few days of attention and pizza to make Bless her usual self again. But that didn't mean that she was happy and hyper. Just able to move and talk again. The two of them were sitting in Bless' room. "What happened to you Bless?" Shade asked softly. Bless shrugged again. Shade sighed irritably.

"I don't even remember…" Bless said, slightly growling.

"Well… do you remember what happened before you went into that trance of yours?"

"Yes…" she said, narrowing her eyes at Shade. He looked at her nervously. "But it isn't entirely your fault…" she admitted. "It's those dreams too… but I'm still not telling you about them." she said stubbornly.

Shade felt as if he was ready to snap at her, but he couldn't or Bless could end up depressed again, and they were running out of Pizza. "I just… really want this to end… I'm in so much pain… I want our family to be back together… you know, you me mum and dad… I miss it so much…"

"Bless… this was like… over 20 years ago… it's time to move on… I've moved on…" Shade said.

"Yes… because you've grown old and gotten and family! I haven't changed a bit! I should be 30 now but look at me!" Bless yelled. "So how can you expect me to move on!"

Shade just sighed, not knowing what to say. He had no idea what to do. Bless would stay young forever and she would live in the past forever. Nothing could be done to change it either.

Shade decided to give up on trying to make life better for Bless and left her to get on with her life and not waste her time. He would check up on her regularly to stop her from becoming lonely and depressed again.

Later on that year, when Shade went out to get supplies, he realised that the warehouse he usually stole from was shutting down. He couldn't believe it, he didn't know where the nearest one was apart from this one. Where would they get their supplies from now? He stole as much as he could and went home to tell Bless and Heather.

They were shocked to hear this and very worried. They'd have to ration their food even more now, and they were already rationing it a lot since they didn't have the triplets to help them! So, they lived on, eating less and less. No more Pizza or treats, which Bless was very irritated about.

Soon enough they were eating as little as a few slices of bread a day. "That's it! I'm fed up with this! I'll help you get more supplies if it means not having to live like this!" Bless said while they were sitting down the their meal of bread and water.

"No! You can't leave the shelter! You're a red and black hedgehog, so you'll be spotted easily!" Shade said. "We'll have to stay like this…" he sighed. "Maybe someone else will show up to help us or something."

"But… this isn't fair… we've been living like this for over a year now!" Bless complained.

"Well what do you expect! This is an underground shelter! We're wanted by GUN, we're not going to have a fancy life, are we!" Shade yelled angrily across the table at her. Bless looked back at Shade in hatred.

"I… hate you…" she hissed and then there was silence for a while until there was a large banging. Someone was knocking on the entrance door for the shelter, and they were knocking loud. It was as if they'd been found and a soldier had finally come to take them away, weather they came quietly or kicking and screaming.

Bless knew this day would come and she was ready for it. They slowly walked towards the door to see if they were right, the knocks continuing, getting louder and faster. Shade decided to be brave and open it, this was the only way the noise would stop.

He slowly made his way to the door, his heart rate increasing, this could be the end for them all. He reached for the handle and turned the latch…

Lucy Labrado