A/N: Alright I know I said no more side missions unless I found a reason, well here's the reason. Another item on Hammerlock's list of cures for Maya will be found soon, but not after Zero does some 'research'. Chapter 10: Skag Den Slaughter
Mission(s): Urine, You're Out * Side Mission
DLC: Sir Hammerlock's Big Game Hunt
Zero needed to acquire another piece of the cure on Hammerlock's list, so in light of stumbling on a new area with quite a lot of Savage camps scattered about Zero decided to get on with it. The Assassin – after finding a place where (if Maya were on the adventure with him) they would have slept the night – asked Claptrap for any missions that would lead him to any of the items on the list.
Claptrap explained the mission, "Some bedwetting skag has been marking his territory all around my grove. I don't actually have a sense of smell, but I still have enough self-respect to resent people who pee all over my stuff! I need you to go wash the wee-wee away, but you can only do it at night. The skag's tinkle juice is invisible during the day."
After making sense of this, Zero jumps off the plateau and lands on the wooden platform near the catch-a-ride station. After summoning a Fan Boat he piloted it on a course through the swamp that took about 30 minutes to get through. After Zero arrived, and slowed down to avoid being spotted or heard by a group of Savages up ahead, he checks his minimap.
Zero found no shorter route from where he had started to here, after stashing the Fan Boat in a safe place Zero continued forward. At first it was easy going, Zero's suite keeping him safe from the frigid waters and his golden gun capping off any Savages stupid enough to be patrolling the waters without a Fan Boat.
Unluckily for Zero, as he neared his objective – which could only be reached on foot apparently – he got attacked by two Fan Boats controlled by Savages, unlucky for the Savages Zero had a Norefleet. And he used it, the Maliwan rocket launcher worked like a charm, despite it being a flame element and the abnormally low temperature present this deep into Aegrus.
After taking out the Fan Boats Zero moved forward again and this time instead of encountering more Fan Boats filled with Savages around the next bend, Zero found a hole. A metal tunnel, carved deep into the rock that ended with an exit where Zero stood. Mischievously Zero placed an old but still usable stick of dynamite on the roof of the metal tunnel. He tapped it there with a strip of very old but still widely used Gaff tape.
Taking no more time than absolutely necessary Zero walked forward into the middle of two Savage houses, built as if to sentinel the entrance to a cave system. Zero knew by instinct that the Savages inside were Witch Doctors, and those slimy old bastards only came out at daytime.
So being the clever Assassin that he was, Zero decided to torch the houses. And after blowing the metal tunnel to cave in (the dynamite was so old, it's power was almost incomprehensible) Zero set fire to the houses, and then without looking back walked across some dry land that the houses were built on and into some more water inside the cave/tunnel.
Zero made it inside, and after running/slogging fast through the water for about 100 feet he finally came to an intersection. Zero then turned right and found that only about 10 more feet away was the area he was looking for. Zero moved forward and passed between two more tree roots almost blocking his path.
Zero then walked up a slope and came to a relatively closed off area, with a pillar and a rocky platform on top of it in the middle of the chamber surrounded by water near the bottom. The whole place was filled with skag dens, and Zero took out his shotgun because he knew this would be a close fight.
Amid the frantic dodging of skags claws, and swamp corrosive skag spit Zero found the first patch of urine on a radio.
Claptrap comments, "It just came right off, huh? Great!"
The second patch of urine Zero found on a cart high above on top of a bunch of rock ledges stacked on top of each other.
"Oh crap, you know what I just realized? The smell of the urine was keeping a bunch of the other creatures away. Watch out, minion – things just might get hairy," Claptrap warned.
And indeed things did get hairy, not only did Zero have to contend with a great outpouring of regular skags from … well nowhere, but also a bunch of corrosive swamp skags were popping out of dens as well. Zero found the next one sitting on another random object on top of the rock pillar. Zero simply found a ledge that lead up to the height of the top of the pillar, than jumped across.
Claptrap says encouragingly, "Just a few more pee stains! Just a reminder, don't eat anything until you've washed your hands. And then amputated them. And then replaced them with sterilized robot hands!"
After nearly an hour of moonlight Zero finally slaughtered nearly 200 skags. Around the 150th Zero – amazingly – ran out of shotgun ammo and had to resort to splitting them down the middle with his katana. Zero then found the last stain and wiped it away like all the others.
"Alright, you're all done! Come on back, you glorified gun-toting janitor, you!" Claptrap says in celebration. After that's all said and done, Zero trudges back still under the moonlight to his stashed Fan Boat.
Once Zero makes it back, and marches all the way up to the top of the Savage village he asks Claptrap, "I know you're trying / to help me I need to know / why did I do that?"
Claptrap can't answer, because at the moment he's currently in hibernation mode, that or he was just avoiding Zero.