Little Souvenir
Chapter 10
Oh Brother, A Baby
Author's Notes: I noticed that most of you didn't like the last chapter. The general concenus was that you didn't like Jordan being Jordan. Which is fine. Everyone is entitled to his or her own opinions. Also one reader said that Woody would have recognized the back of Cal's head regardless of how much time had passed between "Thin Ice" and "Skin and Bone." Which is probably true, so in my little world Cal got a tan and a haircut and trimmed down and buffed up, thus making him less recognizable to his brother. Also, some of you pointed out the reason for the gifting of Woody is that he got a new office, but I liked the idea of making it his birthday (because they never do say when his birthday is) so the whole brining Cal in makes a little bit more sense, especially in this chapter. Hey, it's an alternate universe fic - if I say it's Woody's birthday, it's Woody's birthday.
Once again, I probably won't reply to reviews unless I absolutely feel that I must, seeing as it's less that two weeks until my wedding. (Yikes!) I'll probably try to squeeze another update in before the big day otherwise it might be two or more weeks before I can update. Patience, please! I have enough that I'm stressing over.
WARNING: Some silliness ahead. You'll see what I mean.
Chapter Notes: Thanks to the Crossing Jordan Encyclopedia for having the episode summary and notes for Crossing Jordan episode 5.18, "Thin Ice."
Jordan had been frustrated by Lu's lack of compassion for Shannon Page. Her attitude towards the woman had bordered on indifferent, and Jordan had nearly flown off the handle. Of course, when she finally did fly off the handle it had been in front of Jeffery Brandau, who had then promptly requested that she be taken off the case. Garret had conceded without a fight, and told Jordan to go cool her heels for a bit.
Which was what Jordan was doing in the break room with Cal. He had explained at lunch a few days back that he'd been able to transfer to Boston to work with various companies that used his agency. Though he'd still have to go to New York for the occasional job, he would more or less be living in Boston full time, indefinitely. Jordan had sobbed when he told her that, but he had laughed and chalked up her reaction to her rampaging hormones. So now Cal was a frequent visitor at the morgue, and more often than not he brought photo albums he had brought from Kewaunee.
She had already seen the albums of their childhood, and had commented on how each of the Hoyt boys had their mother's eyes. She saw awkward Halloween costumes, and she couldn't help but giggle over pudgy young Woody, looking exactly like Vern Tessio from Stand By Me. She had to admire how he had trimmed down and grown out of that awkward, chubby phase into the attractive man he was today.
But she was currently trying to remember to breathe over the picture Cal was currently showing her.
"…for a good cause, really," Cal was explaining. "We always did weird things like this for fundraisers."
"But that dress!" Jordan squealed, wiping tears from her eyes.
Nigel looked over Jordan's shoulder and burst out laughing. "Not dear Woodrow's shade, I'm afraid. Peach washes him out terribly."
"And the cut, not flattering at all," Lily put in, giggling to herself.
It seemed as if most of the morgue had gathered around the album, and even Garret had sidled up to take a peek. Shaking his head, he laughed. "Some men can pull that off. Woody isn't one of them."
"'Woody isn't one of them' what?"
The entire break room fell silent. Everyone parted to the sides, showing Cal and Jordan sitting at the table, the photo album in front of them.
"Uh, hi Woody," Jordan said with a nervous smile. "Worn any pretty dresses lately?"
Woody would have normally had some sort of snarky response to that, but he could only glare at his brother. "Cal," he growled.
"Yo, Woods," Cal said, trying to hide his embarrassment. "How's it going?"
"What the hell is your problem?!" Woody roared as he crossed over to the table. He grabbed the photo album and glared at the picture everyone was talking about. For a school fundraiser Woody had donned a peach colored '80s prom dress, complete with hideously huge sleeves and a great big bow on his hip. "What would possess you to bring these here?!"
"Hey now, Woody, he's showing me embarrassing pictures of himself, too. I have to say, that one of Cal in just the cowboy boots is adorable," Jordan said, making Cal cough and blush. Jordan playfully punched his arm. "You shouldn't be embarrassed, Mr. Calvin Kline underwear model. Before long, your half-naked picture will be adorning the lockers of your obsessed teenaged public."
"Jordan, what are you talking about?" Woody asked with an irritated sigh.
Jordan nudged Cal. "Tell him!" she hissed.
"I, uh, was in New York and a model scout saw me. I'm the new poster boy for Calvin Klein. Pretty ironic, huh?" He ended with a nervous chuckle.
"A real job?"
"Yeah. Pays pretty good too. I'm currently working in Boston though. I've done about five shoots since I got here."
"And when was that?"
"A few days ago."
Suddenly it clicked in Woody's brain. The guy that Lu had seen Jordan with at the sandwich shop had to have been Cal. "When, exactly?"
"Your birthday."
"Okay, I think the show's over," Nigel said, ushering everyone except Jordan out of the break room. He gave her a look that translated to, 'Good luck' before sitting down at his desk and glancing at the break room nervously.
"My birthday…did you even remember my birthday?"
"Hey Woody, didn't you get a pair of Red Sox tickets for your birthday?" Jordan asked.
Startled, Woody looked at her. He hadn't told anyone about those tickets, not even Lu. "Yeah…"
Jordan nodded her head towards Cal, who was looking at his brother sheepishly. "Happy birthday from your baby brother."
"Is that true?" Woody asked quietly.
"Yeah. They're really good seats too. Out field, prime home run territory."
Woody didn't know what to say. He had pushed Cal out of his life, and then Jordan, and now the pair was sitting at a table looking comfortable and relaxed and liked they belonged together. "So how long have you two been dating?"
Both Jordan and Cal erupted into laughter. "We're not dating!" Cal laughed. "She's like my big sister. Chews my ass up and then spits it out when I screw up. If I thought you were tough, I had no idea that Jordan would be tougher. She's really helped me start over, become a better person. I owe her a lot, but we're not dating. That'd just be weird."
Suddenly a terrible smell wafted in from autopsy one, the decaying Lt. Frank Rigroski. Jordan's stomach turned and she quickly stood up and bolted to the locker room. Cal, sensing that her nausea coupled with the smell, faced Woody. "I'm trying to do something with my life, Woody. Give me a little credit, okay?" And he followed Jordan to the locker room.
Woody studied the other picture on the page, Cal in a similar get up, but his dress was bright red and covered in sequins. Call had shaved his chest and his legs, while Woody had opted for a longer dress because he didn't want to shave his legs. It had been a fun night, because for one moment in time it seemed as if the Hoyt boys were going to be just fine. Suddenly aware that he was alone, Woody realized that Cal had gone running after Jordan, and Jordan had gone running to the bathroom, and knowing Cal, he'd walked right into the ladies room without batting an eyelash.
Woody walked to the locker room and poked his head in, relieved that no other woman was in there. He could hear the soft murmur of Cal's voice and Jordan retching over one of the toilets.
"You've gotta tell him. You've gotta tell everyone. They'll put it all together before too long. Yes, they work with dead people, but they're still doctors. Jordan, they'll put two and two together and figure out that you're pregnant. And like you said, if you tell them that it's Pollack, Garret and Nigel will hunt him down even though the baby isn't his. You said that they were finally starting to trust Woody again. Don't make him a pariah just because you can't tell him that you're pregnant with his kid."
"There's a slight chance that the baby's Pollack's," Jordan answered weakly before bending over to throw up some more.
Woody stood frozen in place, not quite computing what he was hearing.
"And an even greater chance that the baby is Woody's. You said that your anti-biotic negated your birth control, and for once in his overly prepared life Woody didn't have a condom. Jordan, you gotta face the facts. I know it sucks, but even if Woody decides to revert back to being the world's biggest dick, I'm here for you and my little niece and/or nephew."
"Don't you dare curse me, Calvin Coolidge Hoyt. I am not carrying twins."
Cal laughed, snapping Woody out of his thoughts. He walked up behind Jordan and Cal and cleared his throat.
"Something you want to tell me?"
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