Not Another Mistake
The next few weeks of their lives were infinitely more complicated, more so than Felicity could've imagined. She found herself watching Oliver with concern every minute that they were together, wondering when he was going to break. Slade was alive and a threat that they hadn't seen coming. He wouldn't hesitate to kill them, any of them, which had Oliver more on edge than normal. When he wasn't with her himself, it was Diggle who was shadowing her and it was driving her crazy.
She pulled her coat on over her pajamas, slipping her feet into a pair of fuzzy slippers before jogging down her front steps and out to the car parked at the curb. Opening the passenger side door, she slid into the car and handed John a cup of hot chocolate.
"This is ridiculous," she pointed out, "Have you been out here all night?"
He shrugged, "He's worried about you, Felicity, and so am I. You're not safe on your own. If Slade figures out that you and Oliver are…"
She waved a hand at him, "Undefined."
John grinned.
"If he figures out how important you are to Oliver, he won't hesitate to take you out."
She sighed, "If Slade wants to kill me, John, he can. There's nothing that you can do to stop it."
"I just want to make sure that you're okay."
"And I love you for that, but I'm fine. Go home."
He shook his head and handed back the mug.
"Oliver isn't going to like it if I leave you alone," he told her.
She rolled her eyes as she climbed out of the car, "Don't worry about Oliver, I'll talk to him."
She went up the front steps and entered the warmth of her home. Going to the window, she waited until John pulled away before she picked up her phone.
I don't need a bodyguard. John isn't any safer than I am.
His response was almost immediate.
Good morning to you, too, Felicity. It's just a precaution. And John volunteered.
She rolled her eyes.
If something happens to him because he's trying to protect me, I'll never forgive myself.
She waited for his response, carrying her phone and John's mug into the kitchen. She was standing at the counter pouring herself a cup of coffee when her phone rang. Glancing down, she saw Oliver's face light up her screen and she couldn't help the smile that tugged at her lips.
"Hi."
"I need to make sure that you're safe, Felicity, please don't fight me on this," he urged.
She sighed, "I get it but I don't want any of you to get distracted by trying to keep me safe. I appreciate that you want to protect me and that John wants me to be safe, but if anything happened to any of you, I wouldn't be able to live with myself."
She was met with silence and for a moment she wondered if she'd lost him. When he spoke, however, the emotion in his voice overwhelmed her.
"I can't lose you. If Slade finds out how much I need you, he'll take you away from me. That can't happen. I won't let it happen."
She sat down heavily on a stool at the breakfast bar. With her phone cradled against her ear, she sat with her hands wrapped around the warm ceramic of her mug.
"I don't want to lose you either, Oliver. When you called that night and Sara heard Slade, when we all saw how terrified she was, I was so worried. And then we figured out where you were, that he was at your house with your mother and Thea, Oliver I was scared and I couldn't even do anything to help you."
The moment that he'd come back into the foundry that evening, she'd thrown herself into his arms and she'd felt a sense of relief that she hadn't felt since the night that Barry had saved his life. She'd been trapped in the foundry all alone, worrying that – at any moment – she would have to listen to a fight between Slade and Oliver that could've easily taken him away from her. She had been so worried that she would never see him again.
"Just knowing that you're there for me is enough. Knowing that you're waiting for me is enough. I love knowing that I have you to come home to."
She felt the heat rise in her cheeks at his words even though he wasn't there to see her blush.
"Oliver…"
"I just want to know that you're safe and short of keeping you with me twenty-four seven, having John looking out for you is the only way that I can do that, Felicity."
She shook her head, staring down into her coffee. She wanted to tell him the same thing that she'd told John, that if Slade wanted to kill her, he could and there was nothing that any of them could do about it. She wanted to tell him that but she didn't. There was no point in starting an argument.
"It's going to be okay. We'll find Slade and you'll stop him. I know you will," she assured him.
He sighed, "How do you know? Why are you so sure that we'll get through this?"
"Because I know you, Oliver. I trust you. I have faith in you. We'll be okay."
He sighed, "I can't figure out what I've done to deserve that trust."
She smiled, wishing that he were there with her, that he was sitting beside her so that she could rest her head on his shoulder or press her lips to his jaw. She wanted to comfort him, she wanted to be there for him because she could hear the wariness in his voice. Oliver was scared. She'd never seen fear like this in his eyes but every time they spoke about Slade and what his return meant, she saw a terror in his eyes that made her wonder if this would be the end of them. She couldn't tell him that she was afraid, that she worried about him every time he put on his hood and left her sight. Slade Wilson could kill him, she was perfectly aware of that, of the power that he had, but she couldn't let her fear control her. She had to put on her normal, optimistic face because the last thing that Oliver needed was one more person fueling his fear.
"Don't go to work today," he suggested, "I want to see you."
She smirked, "Well if you actually show up and play the part of CEO, you will see me. You know, your Executive Assistant is with you all day long."
"I can't… I can't be there today. I just can't. But I need you with me. I can pick you up in an hour."
She glanced at the clock on her microwave. She contemplated telling him no, telling him that they both needed to make an appearance at Queen Consolidated today, but she couldn't do it. She missed him and he was proposing spending the day together, just the two of them. She didn't have the heart to say no to him.
"Okay," she conceded, "Where are we going?"
She could practically hear him shrug, "Anywhere. Nowhere. It doesn't matter."
She sighed, resisting the urge to roll her eyes, and carried her cup to the sink. Of course he wouldn't have a destination in mind. Not that she minded making their day up on the fly, but she did need to know how to dress.
"Can we take the motorcycle?"
She wished that she could see the surprise on his face. She had yet to get on the back of the bike, not that he'd suggested it, but a small part of her had been wondering what it would be like to ride it with him, to be that close to him while adrenaline coursed through her. It was going to be a chilly day but even the prospect of cold air whipping across her face appealed to her.
"Are you sure?" he asked, "You won't hack on me, right?"
She laughed, "I'll try not to."
She padded down the hall to her bedroom, heading straight for her closet. Oliver was quiet on the other end of the line but she wasn't ready to disconnect the call. She sifted through her closet, looking for something warm enough and appropriate for being on the back of the motorcycle. She pulled a sweater from the hanger, one that she had worn a million times over during the winters she'd spent at school in Boston, and tossed it onto her bed.
"Felicity?"
She paused in pulled her pajama top over her head, "Yes, Oliver?"
"Thank you."
She cocked her head to the side, confused as to what he was thanking her for. She hadn't done anything.
"For what?"
He exhaled heavily, "For having faith in me."
She blinked to chase away the tears that were suddenly welling in her eyes. There were times when she couldn't believe how vulnerable he was, how helpless he could be. Oliver was always the strong one, the one that fought through the pain, who took on every battle head on. But there were times when he needed someone there for him, someone to remind him that he wasn't alone. And there were times when he really just needed someone to remind him that he wasn't a monster.
"You're welcome. And Oliver? Nothing is going to change that. Nothing that happens or has happened will change how I feel. I believe in what you're doing and I know that you can do it."
He cleared his throat, "I'll be there in an hour, okay?"
"Okay, I'll see you then. Bye, Oliver."