A good nights sleep.

A/N- busy week on the beach, meant I almost didn't get this done. x

"I wish you would have come to me. I was worried about you." Maura said quietly as she sat in the space beside Jane on the couch. They had gravitated towards each other at the end of the day, as they so often did. Each seeking comfort in the other, in their simple intimacy.

"I know. I couldn't come, not until it was over. I couldn't afford to fall apart." Jane admitted. "But knowing you'd be there if I did, meant everything to me...really." Jane assured with a lopsided smile.

Maura moved a little closer. It had taken everything she had, not to go to Jane when she could see her suffering. Maura had stood on the sidelines like a dutiful best friend, when every instinct she had, wanted to reach out and hold Jane too her. Jane was not the only protective one in their relationship and the reappearance of the Hoyt case had instantly brought out protective Maura, the problem being that it bordered on the possesive Maura. She had to remind herself repeatedly that Jane wasn't really her's.

"I wish I could just forget him and most of the time, I can. But then comes a case that has a similarity or someone asking questions and it all comes flooding back." Jane appeared relaxed as she slouched into the couch, if you overlooked the way the fingers of her left hand roughly massaged the scarred palm of her right, Maura did not.

"I know what you mean." Maura agreed, looking at her own hands briefly.

So much of Jane's self was wrapped up with Charles Hoyt, in her work, she was always defined by that case, she would never escape it. Even her relationship with Maura, they had moved closer together each time that the threat of Hoyt had surfaced. The first time Jane had stayed at Maura's house, the first time they had shared a bed, a time when Jane had trusted Maura unlike anyone else and had not been disappointed.

"You didn't seem to be afraid. Do you still think about it?" Jane had been wondering how Maura had seemed so unmoved by the first murder scene, set up to get their attention. Afterall, she had her own brush with Hoyts evil. The memory of that day lived on in the worst of Jane's nightmares, how could it be that Maura had so easily moved on.

"Of course I still think of it." Maura frowned sharply. It had been the most terrifying experience of her life. Not only had her own life been threatened but it was being used to destroy Jane.

"I suppose I was focused on you. Hoyt is your demon." Maura had to be honest and she knew it was more than that. "You saved me then and you have saved me each time I needed you, I don't doubt you would do it again." Maura explained confidently.

Jane recalled the depth of the anger that had surged like a supernatural strength inside her and been released upon Hoyt and his accomplice when they had threatened Maura's life. Jane would protect Maura at all costs, she had proved that to them both.

"You don't really think I am crazy do you?" Jane sighed shakily, her head hanging back against the top of the couch.

Maura frowned again. "Of course not." She assured, deciding to answer this as Jane's best friend not as a Doctor for once. "Anyone who was faced with the circumstances you have faced, both in the past and most recently would have some reactions. The nightmares had faded before all this and they will fade again."

"I guess." Jane agreed, reassured by Maura's confidence in her. Trying not to focus on what it meant that the nightmares had almost totally vanished when Jane slept with Maura.

"And if they don't or you still feel like you need some support, we can get you some. It's not crazy. It doesn't make you crazy...or weak." Maura said sternly.

Jane nodded. "I know that." She told herself as much as Maura. Jane lent her head on her rational friend's shoulder and gave a small sigh of relief. Maura had really been her rock through this latest escapade and Jane hadn't failed to notice each of the small reassuring smiles and offers of support.

Maura put an arm around Jane's waist and gave her a small squeeze, it was so good to have her back here, where Maura could be on hand. Maura knew that tonight they would sleep in her bed, side by side and that she could drift off listening to the sound of Jane's breathing, more importantly that she would be there if Jane was woken by another nightmare.

Jane yawned and snuggled closer into Maura. Jane took in the familiar scent of the doctors perfume, and felt the delicate softness of Maura giving way to let Jane in and curling around her instinctively. Jane watched the rise and fall of Maura's chest and time seemed endless.

Jane pulled her head away from Maura and sat up a little straighter, looking at her friend in a grateful way and just about to suggest they move upstairs. Maura however, feeling suddenly bereft of Jane as the weight of her pulled away, found her fingers reaching for the dark curls that framed Jane's face. Maura slowly brushed them back and tucked them behind an ear.

Jane suddenly saw something she didn't recognise in her friend's face and gazed at her questioningly, but with a tender, slightly concerned, smile.

In that moment Maura knew that she was going to kiss Jane, she knew it but was utterly powerless to stop it, like the slowed down moments just before an accident occurs. Maura pushed slightly forward and brushed Jane's lips with her own. The kiss was hardly even there and it was gone before Jane knew it, but before they could pull apart completley Jane had reacted and gone after Maura's retreating lips, pulling her back and making certain that she had not just imagined the taste of Maura's mouth.

Maura had been about to shrink away and offer an apology or pray that Jane hadn't noticed her move, when she was suddenly and unexpectedly pulled back in, folded into Jane's arms which had wound their way around her, one hand then reaching to cup Maura's face as the deep, ragged kiss ended.

Maura's eyes had closed as their lips had met and now as she opened them she felt the shock of reality. She had kissed Jane and had been kissed in return. Her heart drummed in her chest, her stomach was hit by a tsunami wave of nervous excitement and left with aftershocks of nausea.

"Jane...I'm sorry, I shouldn't have..." Maura flustered, looking away from Jane's unreadable expression.

Jane clamped a hand around Maura's lower arm as she felt Maura trying to break away. "No. It's alright. It was me...I..." Jane stalled. "It's been an emotional few days, for us both."

Maura instantly burned with guilt as she thought about what Jane was saying. She had taken advantage. She had thought about kissing Jane so many times, in so many ways and now when Jane was at her most vulnerable, in most need of her friend, Maura had given in to her own desires. The fact that Jane had responded was lost in Maura's guilt stricken panic.

"Still, I shouldn't. ..." Maura breathed shakily.

Jane had to take control. She knew that Maura struggled with the distinctions that others, including Jane, seemed to mutually agree to. Maura was so casual in her attitude to sex and had none of the hang ups of almost every other person Jane knew. Jane had once been shocked and then refreshed by Maura's attitude but had quickly come to find it confusing. This kiss was probably just a way for Maura to offer comfort to her friend and maybe she could even sense Jane's longing for it. But she must know that to Jane it would mean something else entirely.

Jane had wanted to take refuge in Maura and had somehow become lost in her. In the feel of her arms and the warmth she reserved solely for Jane, in the way Maura's eyes looked at Jane like she was a hero, like she was a saint. The other thought that took hold of Jane was that Maura had felt sorry for her and Jane could not allow that, she couldn't bare for Maura to kiss her out of pity.

"Forget about it Maur, really. Lets go to bed." Jane said calmly, taking Maura's hand and heaving them both up from the couch. For tonight Jane just wanted to sleep and she needed Maura for that. She couldn't afford for either of them to weird out. She would process this tomorrow.

Maura followed Jane's lead, not only across the room but also in putting the kiss as much out of her mind as she could. At least until she heard Jane's breathing slow and deepen into a rhythm indicative of sleep. Then Maura stiffened beside her friend as she replayed that moment over and over again in her mind. When she had finally accepted the inevitability of her own action, she was left to try and interpret Jane's reaction. The kiss hadn't broken them, Jane had not rejected her. Was Maura wrong to nurture the seed of hope that had sprung up in her? It was this question that followed Maura into sleep.

xxxxxx

Thanks y'all xx