Ranma's Horrible Histories
Chapter Ten
Fly Away Home
Pre-read by Hiryo.
Disclaimer:
Ranma 1/2 is not mine. Serenity/Firefly is not mine. They are both the intellectual property of other people, and I should be beaten with wet poodles, if I ever make money from this.
An unbreakable toy is useful for breaking other toys.
Ranma had been bouncing around the doomsday portal like a pea in a vacuum, and after vomiting several times, had reached the point of not having anything left in his stomach.
Face green and slightly singed from the last drop kick through a dimensional gate Ranma had closed his eyes and was holding on to his 'poking stick' with both arms and legs. So he didn't notice, when the key began to glow pink, again.
----------------------------------
In a wild tangle of limbs, Ranma landed with a thump on top of Inarra, who remained in stunned silence for all of three seconds, before the shouting started.
At the other end of Serenity, Mal who had finally gotten back into what he had been reading was wrenched away with more screams. Fortunately, these were the normal kind and didn't sound like they were coming from the walls.
In fact, they sounded a lot like Inarra. Grumbling to himself the captain went to investigate if Jayne had finally snapped, and to see if Inarra had finally been forced to kill him.
Zoe was the first to reach Inarra's rooms after the first outraged scream was heard. On entering she found a dripping Inarra wearing only a towel standing in the doorway to her bathroom breathing quickly. "Inarra, what's the matter?"
Dashing out of the doorway Inarra began searching frantically around her room. "It was here, I know it was here." Saying this she knelt down and began looking under her bed.
"Inarra what are you talking about?" Standing still for a moment Inarra closed her eyes and took a deep breath.
"It was in here, 'Something,' it attacked me in the shower." Inarra sat down on the side of her bed.
Behind Zoe, Mal appeared. "Now Inarra I'm sure Jayne meant it."
Both women looked up at this. "What are you talking about?"
Mal looked around the room. "Jayne hasn't snapped and tried to you-know."
"No I don't know, and Jayne is not the cause of all this."
"Then what in tarnation is the goddamn matter."
Glancing back at her bathroom Inarra grimaced. "I think we have a stowaway."
----------------------------------
Hunkered down in his fort, Jayne was carefully cleaning his guns. He found the action soothing. It reminded him of his Mama, she always told him, when he was just an ankle biter to keep his gun clean and clip full.
Behind him, some one sneezed.
Jayne liked to think no one had noticed how the strange noises had been affecting him, so he was glad no one saw him jump and bring his shotgun around to face what ever was behind him.
Only to fall backwards as something was stuffed down the barrel and exploded in a puff of pink smoke. Through the cloud, Jayne thought he saw a grinning midget.
"You're a funny man."
At this, Jayne started shouting.
----------------------------------
When Mal reached the cargo hold, he found Jayne standing as far way from his fort as he could, staring at his favorite shotgun in stunned silence.
"Jayne what in hell is the matter with you?"
Jayne didn't look up from his gun. "I think we've got Gremlins."
"What are you talking about?"
"Ya know. All the old spacers know about them, they get on your ship pull it to pieces, and that's it your screwed."
"We do not have gremlins."
"Well how do you explain this?" With that, Jayne tossed his once favorite gun to Mal.
Catching it, Mal let it slip through his fingers, as the gun broke into a dozen pieces in his hands.
----------------------------------
It didn't take long for Mal to get everyone gathered around the table. All except Kaylee, who couldn't leave the engine alone after all the commotion, and River who seemed to have disappeared.
"It just appeared out of no where." Inarra had, had a chance to dress and was now holding a hot drink in two hands.
At the end of the table, Mal was going through the security records they had of Serenity's last planet fall.
"I just don't know how any one managed to get on board. There ain't nothin' here."
At the other end of the table, Zoe shook her head.
"Sir, it seems someone did get on board, no matter what the records say. What I want to know how they've managed to hide on the ship for so long."
"We've got Gremlins."
The rest of the crew turned to stare at Jayne who was sitting holed up in the corner, his next favorite pistol clutched in one hand. Mal hadn't let him bring his grenades.
"I damn well told ya, we ain't got no Gremlins."
Simon was the first to speak, after this. "What are Gremlins?"
"They ain't nothin . . . ." Mal was interrupted.
"Crazy little bastards, they get on your ship and rip the innards out." With that, Jayne's eyes did not stop scanning the room.
"What do these, 'Gremlins' look like?" Simon looked at Jayne in interest, of his 'theory.'
"Now you don't go encouraging him. It was just some goddamn stowaway that just tried to sneak a peak at Inarra, not that I don't blame them for trying that."
"Mal!"
"They probably just fell through a weak spot and while you were distracted, got away. Jayne's just got a touch of space fever."
"I tell ya we've got Gremlins."
"Is any one going to mention the noises?" Inarra looked at the others sitting around the table.
"I wasn't gonna a say nothin unless someone else brought it up." Jayne muttered.
"There may nave been some strange sounds, I could have heard." Simon was resistant to being the next to admit that he heard voices.
"I didn't want to mention this, but I have been hearing something that at first I though may be metal fatigue."
"So what we seem to have here is someone has snuck on board and is in hiding. Now what we've to do is smoke them out."
Feeling like an earthquake Serenity shuddered, sending Jayne and Simon, who had been the only two standing, tumbling down.
"Kaylee." Someone cried.
----------------------------------
After sending Zoe to the meeting with a waved hand, Kaylee pulled up her sleeves and got stuck back into the engine's whatchamacallit.
Whatever that light had been had caused the thingamajig, to fuse to the shaft of the whatchamacallit. It wasn't easy being the mechanic on Serenity.
Focused on this, she didn't notice the small form creep into the tight fit engine room.
"I'm hungry. I like milk. Do you have milk? I want milk!" At the sound of a small child whining behind her while she was up to her elbows in whatsthis, Kaylee jerked and something that should have stayed in one piece broke.
----------------------------------
By the time Zoe and Simon had reached the engine room, the stowaway was long gone and Kaylee was fixing the whatsthis with the twenty seventh century's version of duct tape.
"What ya all lookin' at, it went that way." Head still stuck in the engine casing she poked an arm towards the front of the ship. As they left Kaylee sighed, whatever that had been strangely she though it had sounded kinda cute, but very annoying.
----------------------------------
In the Cockpit Mal, stumbled to a halt in the doorway as he saw grinning River sitting at the helm, with what looked like a small dirty child sitting on her lap poking the ships buttons.
"Poke, poke, poke . . . ." River's firm hand kept the child from bouncing off her lap.
Behind Mal, Jayne and Inarra peered over his shoulders.
"See I told ya, a Gremlin." River turned to face them.
"He followed me home. Can I keep him?"
----------------------------------
It was the hard decisions in life that make the difference. There were times in everyone's life when you will have to say yes or no, and from that moment on your life will never be the same again.
When it would be so easy to just throw caution to the wind and not care. She had never taken her choices lightly. Biting her lip Setsuna peered up at the blackboard and sighed. "I'll have a triple espresso don't stint on the caffeine."
Authors Note:
I'm surprised too, the same story updated in less than three months. I think I need to have a drink to get over the surprise.