Many thanks for all the reviews and alerts. Always very much appreciated! Unbetaed, as is usually the case, so apologies for any mistakes.

3/14/14 - Edited to fix a continuity error.

10: Leave-Taking

Telling the Team

The morning was half gone before Gibbs left his desk and headed upstairs to talk to Vance. Ziva and McGee were going through cold case files, while Tony was handling some of the reports that were his responsibility as senior field agent.

It was maybe twenty minutes later when they were all interrupted with a loud "Hey!" Tony turned around and looked up to see Gibbs on the upper landing, leaning on the railing. "Conference room."

The three agents got to their feet and headed for the stairs. Ziva fell in next to Tony. "What is this about?"

Tony sighed. "You'll find out in a minute."

"You already know," she accused.

"Yup."

Ziva grumbled something under her breath. Tony looked at McGee, who glanced at her and shrugged. "You know she hates it when you guys keep secrets from her."

"I can speak for myself, McGee," Ziva said tartly.

"Just thought you should know that I know," he responded, "and that I'm not too crazy about it either."

Ziva smiled at him as they jogged up the stairs. "Thank you, Tim."

Gibbs was already seated when they reached the conference room. Tony let the other two go in first, then closed the door as he followed them.

Gibbs spoke as soon as they were all seated. "I'm headed back up north tomorrow morning; Tony's going with me. We'll likely be gone at least a week. You're welcome to take some vacation time; if you don't want to burn the days, Ziva, Pearson can use a fourth on her team since Henderson's still on maternity leave, and Tim, Vance says there's some new challenges down in the cyber unit if you want to take charge."

There was a moment of silence before both junior agents began talking at once. Gibbs tolerated it for only a moment before he let out a loud whistle, looking to Tony as soon as the room quieted.

Tony leaned forward, resting his forearms on the table. "Look, Tim, Ziva… I know this sucks. And yes, before you ask, we are a team. You talked with Ducky… you know Gibbs went through a rough time up there. He's still dealing with it, and without going into so much detail that I get the mother of all head slaps, he needs to go back up there and confront the demons, you know?"

"And you are going why, exactly?" Ziva asked.

"Already told you he saved my life on the mountain. He knows what went down."

Tony's eyes met Gibbs' briefly before he looked over at Ziva. "Can you see Gibbs being willing to talk it all through, Ziva? He doesn't have to explain anything to me… I can be on his six without him worrying about it."

Ziva's eyes narrowed; she was about to speak when Gibbs cut in.

"Ziver… there's no enemy up there for you to shoot. No one to fight. This is… personal. If you'd been up there with me first time around, you'd be going now."

Ziva stared at him for a long moment, then nodded once. "I understand. I do. I would just like to say that I wish to be considered the next time there is a dangerous operation."

Gibbs nodded. "You will be."

Ziva gave him a small smile, then looked at Tony. "Take care of him, Tony. And yourself. I will be very displeased if either of you comes to harm."

Tony's smile was genuine. "Thanks, Ziva."

She nodded. "I understand personal demons."

"I know."

Ziva looked at Gibbs. "Are we done here? I would like to find Pearson and see how I could help."

Gibbs nodded. "You go ahead. And Ziva… thank you."

McGee cleared his throat as she left. "I get it too… but Tony – winter hiking? Are you sure?"

Tony sat back and shook his head. "Honestly? Not really. But this time there's no reason to pretend I know what I'm doing, since I'll be with Gibbs the whole time."

The younger man smiled. "If Gibbs can't keep you safe, you're doomed."

"Gee, thanks."

McGee looked at both of them. "You think you'll tell us what really happened up there, someday?"

Tony waved a hand in Gibbs' direction. "That's up to the bossman."

McGee nodded. "Fair enough. Good luck, both of you." He got to his feet. "I'll go see the Director, find out what's going on in the sub-basement." He closed the door behind him, leaving Tony and Gibbs alone.

Tony grinned at Gibbs. "Way to be a bastard, Boss."

Gibbs shot him a small smile. "Figured appealing to her own past experiences would be better… she's less likely to go behind our backs now."

"That actually went a lot better than I'd expected."

"Good people," Gibbs commented.

Tony nodded. "What's next?"

Gibbs shrugged. "Finish up that paperwork, clear off the desks as much as possible, head out when we're done. Dinner?"

"Sure. I'll run back to the apartment, made sure everything's good. Gonna head down to see Ducky, then I'll be back at my desk."

Gibbs looked at him searchingly, then nodded. "Good."

Ducky

Tony breezed into Autopsy, glancing around to see Ducky and Palmer absorbed with a body on one of the tables.

"Hey, Ducky… what 'cha got?"

Ducky looked up from where he was bent over the body and smiled. "Anthony! Always a delight, my boy." He straightened and sighed as he looked back down at the young man he'd recently cut open. "Apparent drunk driving – this lad was his own victim, I'm afraid. Abby's running the toxicology screen now, but I have no doubt about the outcome."

Palmer glanced at him, and then at Tony. "At least he didn't hurt anyone else."

Tony looked down at the unmarked but dead face. "Small favors."

"Indeed." Ducky's gaze sharpened a bit. "You appear to have something on your mind."

Tony nodded, then shrugged. "I can come back later, since you're busy."

Ducky shook his head and turned to his assistant. "Mister Palmer, I want you to continue with the autopsy. You know what to do."

Palmer's face lit up. "Are you sure, Doctor?"

Ducky smiled at him. "I am. I shall check your work, if that will make you feel better, but I doubt I will find anything amiss."

"Thank you, Doctor Mallard!"

Ducky led the way to the opposite side of the room, pulling the chair away from his desk and motioning for Tony to grab one for himself. Tony did so, clearing his throat as he sat.

"I take it this has to do with Jethro?"

"Yeah, but I'm actually here on my own account."

Ducky's eyebrows rose. "Then let me know what I can do to help."

Tony glanced over at Palmer, who was clearly focused on his work, muttering to himself. He looked back at Ducky and tapped his chest. "Going back up north… I'm wondering if my lungs are going to handle the weather."

Ducky's eyes widened. "My dear boy – I do apologize. I never considered what the scarring in your lungs might mean for this trip."

Tony waved him off. "No need to apologize. They haven't really bothered me in a long time now. I didn't really think of it myself. Watching Jethro packing up the emergency supplies last night, well, it got me thinking."

"Perhaps it would be best to put off this trip until spring?"

"You really think Gibbs can wait that long?"

Ducky frowned, then slowly shook his head. "Well. I do believe he can, but I don't think he should." He looked thoughtfully at the younger man. "You've been doing well with managing any symptoms. When was the last time you had to use your inhaler?"

Tony shrugged. "Couldn't say… it's been a long time. I make sure they're all within the expiration date, though."

"And the last time you saw Dr. Pitt?"

"Everything was clear. He said if he didn't know I'd had the plague, he wouldn't suspect any scarring at all."

Ducky opened a drawer, pulling out a prescription pad and writing quickly before tearing off the top sheet. "This is for a steroid inhaler. Use it twice a day; start tonight. You can use the rescue inhaler at the same time, if need be. But this may give you a bit more, ah, breathing room, shall we say."

Tony grinned at him as he took the paper. "The Duckster, making with the puns. Nice one!"

Ducky smiled and shook his head, but his expression quickly grew serious. "Have you spoken to Jethro about this?"

Tony looked down at the paper. "Do they teach you scribblese in med school? How can the pharmacist translate this?"

"Do I need to call Jethro down here?"

Tony's head shot up. "No! I'll talk to him tonight, I promise." He met Ducky's steady gaze. "Okay, I haven't brought it up specifically, but last night he insisted I let him know if I'm not feeling a hundred percent, so I think that means he's thought of it. And I told him I was coming to see you just now."

Ducky continued to look at him. "Promise me you will talk to him about this as soon as may be, and will do as he has requested."

Tony nodded. "I promise, Ducky."

"I shall hold you to that, my boy." Ducky got to his feet. "It may do Jethro some good to worry about you rather than obsess over recent events." He laid his hand on Tony's arm. "Do be careful, Anthony. None of us can afford to lose you, him least of all."

Tony blinked rapidly, and gave Ducky a puzzled smile.

"My dear fellow, you can't tell me you don't know how hugely you figure in his life. You've been an important part of it ever since he found you in Baltimore. Given the changes your relationship seems to be undergoing, you are more vital to him than ever. Please do be careful, for his sake as well as your own."

Tony squeezed Ducky's hand. "Thanks... I'll take care of myself, I promise. " He hesitated, then added, "And him." He stood, heading for the door, tossing a salute in Palmer's direction. "Later, Black Lung!"

Palmer waved the slightly bloody tool in his hands as Tony disappeared and Ducky approached the table.

"Well, now, let's see what you have accomplished!"

Worry

"Dinner!" Tony called out as he walked into Gibbs' house. He could hear Gibbs' feet coming up the stairs from the basement as he made for the kitchen. "Chicken parm for me, breaded pork chops for you."

Gibbs peered over his shoulder as Tony set the large paper bag on the counter. "Smells good."

"It's a nice place, authentic. Worth the wait for the takeout." He looked over at Gibbs. "We should go sometime."

Gibbs opened the container with his dinner. "If this tastes as good as it smells, we will."

Tony grinned as he opened a cabinet to grab some plates. Gibbs went to the refrigerator to get them each a beer, then followed Tony out to the dining table.

They ate in silence for a few minutes, then Tony took a long pull from his beer and looked over at Gibbs. "Tim and Ziva still okay?"

Gibbs nodded. "Pearson wants to send Ziva undercover as a fashion model. Got a hot case involving drugs being brought on base, traced them back to this modeling agency, but not sure exactly who the players are."

"She's gonna love that."

"She was pretty excited about it. And Tim looked happy about joining the cyber unit again."

"What's Vance got him working on?"

"Hell if I know. Left the two of them talking gobbledygook."

Tony laughed at that. "I'm sure Probie's gonna enjoy it, whatever it is." He took another bite of his chicken. "You see Ducky and Abby before you left?"

"Gave Duck the basics about Greg's monster idea. He's intrigued, but not worried. Says it seems to him if the spirit or monster or whatever wanted to mess with us, it wouldn't have turned me back."

"Smart man, our Ducky."

"Yep."

"How's Abs?"

Gibbs smiled as he cut another piece off his pork chop. "Hugged me to within an inch of my life."

Tony nodded. "Someday she's gonna break a rib. Then she'll break another one when she hugs as an apology."

Gibbs grunted an acknowledgment.

"She stopping by later?"

Gibbs shook his head. "Doubt it. She was going out to dinner with Greg, was gonna get all the details from him, I think. She said you stopped by before you left."

"She's been awesome through all this. Said she'll text us if she digs up anything else about the spirit-monster."

"We're gonna have the expert with us."

"You know how much faith she has in the internet. She thinks she can find something that he wouldn't know about – and maybe she can."

Gibbs raised his beer. "If anyone can, she can."

Tony clinked the neck of his bottle against Gibbs'. "To Abby."

"To Abby."

They finished dinner and worked together to clean up. Afterwards, Tony wandered into the living room and looked over the packs. "We all set?"

Gibbs moved to stand next to him. "Yup. Anything we figure we need, we can pick up before heading up the mountain." He surveyed the equipment for a moment, then looked sidelong at Tony, whose expression was a mix of pensive and apprehensive.

Tony sensed the scrutiny and sighed, reaching up to grip Gibbs' shoulder for a moment before he headed for the coat rack next to the front door. He returned with a small white paper bag, reaching into it to pull out a box that he held out to Gibbs. The older man took it and read the cover carefully before looking at Tony. "Ducky?"

"Yeah. Went to ask him how to make sure the cold doesn't affect my lungs too much. Already have the usual rescue inhalers… this is in addition to that. I take it twice a day."

Gibbs opened the box and took the inhaler out, handing it to Tony.

"Now?"

Gibbs nodded.

Tony smiled at him. "Gotta get some water… supposed to rinse after I use it." He went back to the kitchen and grabbed a glass from the cabinet, filling it at the sink. He used the inhaler, breathing deeply and then holding it in before exhaling slowly. He rinsed his mouth, spitting the water into the sink before turning around and letting out a small squeak when he saw Gibbs only inches away.

Gibbs' lips twitched a bit. The two men stood there, staring into each others' eyes for what seemed like a long time. Tony finally broke the spell, reaching up to lay the palm of his hand against Gibbs' face. "I'll be okay, Jethro."

Gibbs took a deep breath, then nodded. "You better be."

Tony smiled and dropped his hand. "I promised Ducky earlier and I promise you now that I'll tell you if I don't feel right."

"How bad?"

"You mean how bad might it get?"

Gibbs inclined his head. Tony shrugged.

"Cold air, physical exertion… I figure I'll have to use the rescue inhaler at some point."

Gibbs' brow furrowed and Tony shook his head. "That's not as bad as it sounds. I use that if things start to feel tight… rescue doesn't necessarily mean I'm dying or anything."

Gibbs started to speak, then shook his head and closed his mouth. He sighed and reached up to run his fingers through his own hair. "I want to tell you to stay home… but I also want you with me. Can't imagine dealing with that spirit again without you there."

Tony leaned in and dropped a kiss on Gibbs' hair. "I wouldn't stay home even if you ordered me to."

"Figured that."

Tony winked at him, then moved back out to the living room, stashing the inhaler in his pack and checking on the other ones. He picked up one of the hiking poles, looking it over carefully before setting it back down, then tugged on the clips attaching his sleeping bag to the bottom of his pack.

Gibbs watched him for a few minutes before walking to the front door and locking it. Moving back to the living room, he turned the dimmer switch on the lamp, lowering the lighting in the room. Tony looked up, then back at Gibbs, who walked over to him and reached out a hand.

Tony took it, letting Gibbs pull him to his feet and then over to the couch. They sat down next to each other, Tony letting his head rest on the back of the couch while Gibbs sat facing him, still holding his hand.

"We can wait for warmer weather."

Tony turned to look at him. "Ducky talked to you?"

Gibbs looked puzzled and shook his head. Tony sighed, looking down at their joined hands and rubbing his thumb over Jethro's fingers. "Gotta face those demons, Jethro. I appreciate the thought, but I don't like the idea of you having those worries haunting you for months. The dreams… they're fun some of the time, but the rest of it – not cool."

Gibbs sighed. "You're right… but I need you to be careful."

"I will be. Can't be on your six if I'm not in good shape."

"You remember that." Gibbs leaned in close, brushing a kiss over Tony's lips. "Need you, Tony," he whispered.

Tony reached up, cupping one hand behind Gibbs' head and pulling him closer. He returned the kiss, his tongue lightly touching Jethro's lips. He pulled back after a moment, his eyes meeting Gibbs'. "We need to do this now… want to be able to get our lives back to normal, see where this thing between us is going."

Gibbs rested his forehead against Tony's. "Yeah."

Tony smiled. "Yeah."

Gibbs moved back a bit, smiling, then leaned in again. This kiss was deeper, more demanding. Gibbs raised both hands to Tony's face, and Tony groaned quietly as their tongues met. He gripped Gibbs' hair tightly as his other arm encircled the man's waist, holding him close.

Gibbs shifted closer to Tony, pressing against him. Their kisses intensified until Gibbs pulled back, breathing heavily, shifting his attention to Tony's neck. The younger man dropped his head back, murmuring encouragement. Gibbs lightly scraped his teeth over Tony's skin, making him gasp and grip Gibbs' hair tightly.

Gibbs dropped his head, resting against Tony's shoulder and forcing himself to relax. Tony immediately picked up on the shift in mood, and loosened his grip, threading his fingers through Gibbs' hair and gently rubbing Gibbs' back with his other hand.

They sat together like that for a long time; no words were exchanged.

Eventually Gibbs pulled back and sat up. Their eyes met; they both smiled.

"Sleep?" Gibbs asked, his voice rough.

Tony sighed. "Early morning, right?"

Gibbs nodded.

"Then let's go."

They headed upstairs, with Gibbs turning off the lights as he went. It wasn't long before they were both lying down, curled around each other. Tony hadn't expected to fall asleep easily, but Gibbs was asleep within minutes and Tony wasn't far behind.

Neither man dreamed that night, or if they did, they didn't remember it.