A/N: I started this before I was really sick, continued to write and then finish whenever I had a good day. It's a bit disjointed at times, and I'm not entirely satisfied with how it turned out. However, it is what it is. Credit for the original idea of Shannon dealing with her friend Amy being infatuated with one of her brothers goes to Islaboe. It is also built around the episode: The Truckee Strip. Enjoy!

What Love Means

"I wish my brothers would stop making cow eyes at Katie Adams."

"Katie Adams? Isn't she going steady with Jim Brooks, the bank clerk?"

Amy Jackson nodded as she stretched her arms over her head to grasp the branch above her. "Yep, but that doesn't seem to mean a thing to my brothers. In fact, they've both gotten into knock down brawls because they both think she's the prettiest girl in town and they both want to take her to the next dance."

Wrinkling her nose, Shannon Cartwright decided to be glad she hadn't seen her brothers fight over one girl. "Well, I suppose you'll just have to wait for it to blow over," she said with sympathy. "My brothers have each been in love half a dozen times since I got here. They certainly thought it was something serious but eventually they got back to normal."

Her friend heaved an exasperated sigh. "That can't happen soon enough for me! They are unbearable to be around," she said, pulling herself off the ground. "Why do you think I'm here with you instead of on my way home?"

"I thought you were just being a good friend."

One by one, their fellow students were leaving the schoolyard. A few were still playing a game of tag. "I bet you I could beat you to the top of the tree," Amy said, getting Shannon's attention.

Critically, Shannon tilted her head back to get a good look at the tree. "I don't know. Could it hold us both?"

"What? Are you scared of heights?"

"No!" Jumping, Shannon wrapped her fingers around a different branch and pulled herself up. "First one to the top wins?"

Grinning, Amy nodded. "Ready. Set. Go!"

At the same time, both girls began to climb, each staying on their respective sides of the pine tree. Their race was soon noticed by their classmates, who assembled at the base of the territory and began shouting encouragement. Amy paused to wave at the ground, while Shannon kept her gaze focused on the next branch she needed to grab ahold.

It was when the girls were both nearing the top that Shannon began to have second thoughts about their race. The tree swayed slightly and the branches creaked under her weight. She dared to glance down and the distance seemed to stretch forever. Her eyes focused on a familiar black and white pinto. "Amy, I think we've gone far enough. My brother is here anyway."

"We're nowhere near the top!" Amy complained. She had gotten marginally ahead of Shannon and leaned down to look at her friend.

"I don't want to go any further," Shannon said stubbornly. "Let's just say you won. I'm climbing down."

She stretched to find her footing on the lower branch. She heard Amy groan. "Fine. Spoilsport," her friend said.

Climbing down took much longer than going up had, and Shannon found she had to search for each branch. Several times, her boot slipped on the bark and she had to catch herself. From the muttering overhead, she assumed Amy was having as difficult a time.

And then there was a loud crack, followed by Amy's yelp and then a branch came crashing down past Shannon. Looking up, her eyes widened as she took in her friend, hanging from a branch. "Amy!"

Wildly, Amy's feet kicked, trying to find a branch that wasn't there. Shannon moved to climb to help. That branch cracked but held, making Shannon freeze. Down below, the shouts of encouragement had changed in tone. Above it, Joe's voice called out, "Shannon, don't move! I'm coming!"

"Hold on, Amy," Shannon said, holding still. "Joe's coming."

"I heard that already. I'm not deaf," Amy responded, fear making her tone sharp and angry.

Within a minute or two, Shannon heard her brother coming up right behind her. His arm came around her waist. "I'm going to set you down on the next branch," Joe said. "Once you have your footing, just keep going down. An old tree like this is not good to be climbing in. I'll get Amy."

Nodding, Shannon let go of the branch she had tried to climb onto next and waited until her feet hit the branch before finding one to hold onto. She took a moment to watch her nimble older brother climb up to rescue Amy, who was valiantly holding on. As quickly as she could, Shannon began to climb down.

She was about ten feet from the ground when her boots slipped again on the bark. Her fingers slipped when all her weight was suddenly on her arms. A gasp left her lips as she found herself plummeting to the ground. Then, what felt like an eternity later, she hit the ground, the breath was knocked out of her chest, and everything went black.

The first sense to come back was hearing, although everything was muffled. As if hearing signaled every sense to wake up, aches and pains started making themselves known. Forcing her eyes open, Shannon squinted at how bright everything was. She was on her back and there was a branch sticking into her shoulder.

All of the sudden, Miss Jones was leaning over her. "Just stay still, Shannon," she said. "I've sent someone for the doctor."

"M'fine," Shannon tried to say but she was ignored.

Looking beyond her teacher, Shannon's gaze focused on her brother coming down the branches. Amy was clinging to Joe's back. A moment later, Joe jumped down and helped Amy shimmy down to the ground. He stepped over and knelt down. "Shannon? Can you hear me?"

His voice seemed abnormally loud. "Yeah," Shannon said slowly. She closed her eyes, seeking relief from the light and sounds that made her head pound.

"Shannon, open your eyes and keep talking," Joe ordered. "Do you hurt anywhere?"

Groaning, Shannon pried her eyes open again. "Everywhere."

"Be specific."

Thankfully, Miss Jones seemed to have shooed everyone else away and Shannon tried to focus. "My head, my right ankle, and my back."

She didn't miss the way Joe's face clouded with worry. "Dr. Martin is going to be here soon," he said, squeezing her hand. "Just don't move ok?"

Deciding that answering would take too much energy, Shannon let her gaze slid away from Joe to Amy, who was standing a few feet away. The expression on her friend's face was one Shannon had only seen on her brothers when they were looking at a beautiful woman and a niggling of fear developed in her heart.

Dr. Martin's arrival distracted her from Amy, though. "Well, young lady, I might have known you would be my newest patient," he said, kneeling down. He removed his stethoscope from his bag. "How far do you think you fell? Any specific pains?"

"I don't know," Shannon said, trying to find the branch she'd slipped from.

The doctor raised his eyebrow. "She said her right ankle, her back, and head was hurting her," Joe said. "Doc, she seems kind of confused."

"I'm not confused."

Chuckling, Dr. Martin listened to her heart, had her follow his finger with his eyes, and then gently sat her up. "Whoa," Shannon said as the world spun around her. She waited as the doctor ran his hands along her neck and back. Then, he removed her boot and began manipulating her ankle. "Ow. That hurts."

"Fortunately, it's just a simple sprain," Dr. Martin decreed, pulling a length of white bandage from his bag. "I don't believe she has a concussion, but it would be good to keep an eye on her for the next day or so. I have no doubt she is going to be sore for a week. I recommend she keep to her bed tomorrow and I'll come out in the evening to check up on her."

"Pa's going to have your hide when he learns about what you've been doing," Joe said to Shannon in an effort to distract her.

"Not my fault," Shannon muttered. She glanced over at Amy, but her friend didn't speak up. "Amy wanted to race."

"You could have said no," Joe and Amy said at the same time. The blonde haired girl flushed as Joe added, "Great minds really do think alike."

Shannon glared at them both.

Once the doctor had her foot bandaged up, Joe carried Shannon to Cochise and put her in the saddle. He chucked Amy under the chin with his knuckle and advised her to keep out of trees. Joe mounted behind his sister, informed Miss Jones that someone would be along for Shannon's horse, and pointed Cochise towards.

Any plans Shannon had of dozing on the ride home were thwarted by Joe continually poking her in the arm and telling her to stay awake. With her head aching badly, and being so sore, the girl felt as though the ride took hours. And though her brother pestered her to stay awake, she had the feeling that his mind was somewhere else.

"Pa! Hey, Pa!" Joe shouted as they approached the house.

Flinching, Shannon groaned. "Please don't yell."

"Joe, what happened?" Hoss asked, hurrying towards them from the barn. At the same time, the front door opened.

"Shannon was climbing a tree and slipped," Joe answered, dismounting. He kept Cochise steady as his father and Hoss reached him. "No need to look worried, Pa. Doc Martin checked her out already, and says she'll be fine after a day's rest."

Hoss reached up and pulled Shannon from Cochise. "You find trouble just as easily as Little Joe does."

"Hey!"

"Joe, stop shouting," Shannon pleaded, hiding her face against Hoss' shoulder. "You're making my head hurt worse."

Ben raised an eyebrow at his youngest son. "Perhaps you could explain in a bit more detail what happened, Joseph."

With a promise to do so as soon as he put Cochise up and only if Shannon didn't feel up to telling it herself, Joe headed for the barn. Easily, Hoss carried his little sister into the house and settled her on the settee. Adam came down the stairs, a book in hand. "What happened?" he asked.

"I fell," Shannon said, her tone full of irritation. "Out of a tree."

Her dark haired older brother shook his head. "Trees seem to be a problem to all Cartwrights today," he commented as he took a seat in front of the fireplace. "It's a wonder none of us were hit over the head by a falling branch. That would certainly have been a charming addition to our woes."

"It is not a matter to joke about, Adam," Ben chided. "Shannon, what were you doing in a tree?"

Shannon lifted her arm from where she had laid it over her eyes. "What happened here?" she asked.

"Nothing you need to worry about," Ben told her, his tone short. "Answer my question."

Groaning, and not really caring, Shannon covered her face again. "Joe was late, so Amy and I were climbing a tree to pass the time. Dr. Martin said I'm going to be horribly bruised and sore for the next few days. And I sprained my ankle." She flinched as the front door opened and closed. "Why is everything so loud?"

Her complaint caused her brothers to chuckle. "Pa, Trump is here to talk to you," Joe announced as he entered the great room.

"Hoss, take Shannon up to her room and have Hop-Sing take her up a tray," Ben ordered. "Sweetheart, I'll be up in a little while."

"Yessir," Hoss said, lifting Shannon up again. Dropping her arm, the girl frowned as she was carried upstairs. "Now you just wipe that expression of your face, Shan. Pa's got his reasons for not telling you what's going on and you'd best understand that right now. I'm not going to say a word about it."

"I haven't asked anything," Shannon felt obligated to point out.

Hoss chuckled. "Yet, you mean. You haven't asked anything yet," he said as he carried her into her bedroom. He gently placed her on her bed. "You'll be sticking your nose into it just as soon as you feel better though, and I'm telling you right now you best not. Now, is there anything I can get you before I leave?"

In the middle of unbuttoning her left boot, Shannon paused. "Close the curtain?" she asked hopefully.

Shaking his head, Hoss left the room darkened and left the door ajar just a crack. Shannon dropped her boot, and wondered exactly where its match had ended up. With a sigh, she wormed her way under the quilt and closed her eyes. She could hear the deep rumble of her pa's voice, though the exact words were indistinct.

Whatever was going on, she'd figure it out later.

Yawning, Shannon closed the book she was reading and cast a longing look toward the window. Hop-Sing had been more than happy to them up that afternoon, and the bright sun was shining in. A good night's sleep, which had caused her to miss supper, had driven the headache away, and aches were all that was left behind from her fall.

And now she was bored. Her pa had come in to check on her before he'd gone out to work. There were lines of worry on his face that hadn't been there before. But, knowing she'd never get anything out of him, Shannon had kept quiet.

"Lil' Missy, Missy Amy come see you," Hop-Sing announced, opening her bedroom door.

Delighted, Shannon sat up straighter as her friend entered. "Amy, what are you doing here?"

"I came to see you," the girl answered as if it should have been obvious. "I brought you some homework from Miss Jones, too."

As bored as she had been, Shannon was sure she wasn't that bored. "Thanks, I guess," she said.

Instead of sitting on the bed, as Shannon expected her to do, Amy wandered to the window. "So, where are your brothers today?"

"Out working," Shannon responded, frowning at the odd question. "Like your own brothers, I suppose."

Amy scoffed at that as she turned away from the window. "Don't bring them into it. So...do you know if your family is going to come to the dance this weekend?"

"I think they are. I don't know if I will, though. I'm supposed to stay off my foot as much as possible, you know."

"Are your brothers taking anyone special with them?"

Reminded of the strange way Amy had been staring at Joe the day before, Shannon felt the first niggling of worry. "My brothers never discuss the girls they like with me, but it wouldn't surprise me if they have plans with someone they think is important. They almost always do, especially Joe and Adam."

Amy's lips turned downward slightly. "That's true. They do."

"Let's talk about something else," Shannon suggested, desperate to change the subject. "I think we can agree that our brothers are annoying and leave it at that."

"You're only saying that because you're their sister," Amy objected. "I think your brothers are the nicest, most gentlemanly men I've met."

At that declaration, Shannon burst out laughing. "My brothers? You have to be joking. Adam might be a gentleman, but not the other two."

"You wouldn't understand," Amy said in a haughty tone of voice. She glanced at the window and heaved a sigh. "Well, I should get home. Tell your brother Joe I say hi."

Since Shannon had no intention of doing that, she kept her mouth shut. It was only after Amy had left, she realized her friend hadn't actually given her any assigned reading or homework. Groaning, Shannon fell to the side and buried her face in her pillow.

"Why not happy friend visit?"

Hop-Sing's question brought Shannon's head up. "I don't think she rode all this way just to see me," she said candidly.

"Why she come if not to see Lil' Missy?"

Shaking her head, Shannon heaved a sigh. "I don't know exactly."

The cook gave her a look that expressed how confused he was by her, set a tray with tea and cookies on her lap, and hurried out. The second cup and number of cookies indicated he had expected Amy to stay longer. Shannon picked up her tea and sipped it, letting the warm liquid soothe her.

"Maybe I just imagined it," she finally decided. Amy's odd behavior could easily explained: Miss Jones would have been upset a child had been injured and exacted strict rules on the others. Amy would have hated being restricted from tree climbing.

Determining that it would be a shame if any of the cookies went to waste, Shannon set herself to consume them all. When Hop-Sing returned for the tray, he shook his head and scolded her for being like 'Mistah Hoss'. Feeling stuffed, Shannon secretly agreed that she had been a little greedy and was already regretting it.

"Hop-Sing, is that oatmeal cookies I smell?" Hoss' voice reached them from downstairs.

Eyes widening, Hop-Sing rushed out, presumably to save the cookies from being devoured by Hoss. Shannon hugged her pillow, waiting for her brother to come up. It was nearly five minutes later, and he looked hurt. "Hop-Sing is being awfully protective of those cookies," he said, keeping his hands behind his back.

"They're really good," Shannon informed him. "I bet he wants the whole family to appreciate them."

"Hop-Sing let you have cookies and won't give me any?" Hoss exclaimed. "And here I spent all day searching for the perfect branch."

Confused, Shannon tilted her head. "Is there such a thing as a perfect branch?"

Grinning broadly, Hoss brought forth what he had been hiding: a crutch. "There is when you need to craft a crutch," he said. "If you need to keep off that ankle of yours, you're going to need help getting around."

Delighted, Shannon held her hands out. "Thank you, Hoss! Can I try it?"

"Not until Doc Martin says you can get out of that bed," Hoss said, walking to her bed to had it to her. Up close, Shannon saw the worry hidden in his eyes.

"Hoss, what's wrong?"

Her brother forced a smile. "It ain't nothin' for you to be worried about, Shan," he said. "I done told you that last night."

"Every time you or Adam or Joe say that, I find myself in a heap of trouble," Shannon pointed out, tightening her grip on the crutch. "There's no point in lying to me, Hoss. I can see it i your eyes something is bothering you. Tell me."

Just when she thought Hoss might hold out against her, he heaved a sigh. "Fine," he said, sitting on the edge of her bed. "Now, I don't want you to start frettin' when I get done tellin' you. It will work itself out like it always has."

Shannon narrowed her eyes. "You're beating around the bush."

"Little Joe...well, he and Pa had a bit of a disagreement last night," Hoss told her. "This fuss over a piece of land that the judge decided belonged to us..." He trailed away, shaking his head. "Pa's set on defending what's his, and Joe just don't agree with it. That's all there is to it, plain and simple. They're buttin' heads."

Puzzled, Shannon shook her head. She'd seen her brothers disagree, and Adam never made a secret of when he had a different opinion from Pa. But Joe? Even when Joe was mad about having a new sibling, he'd still listened to his father and hadn't caused the worry she saw in Hoss' eyes. It made no sense.

"Joe's always been behind Pa when it comes to fighting for what's— for what belongs to the Ponderosa," she said softly. Somehow, she couldn't bring herself to say 'what's ours'. It didn't feel right, like she had no real claim to the ranch for all she was a Cartwright. She pushed the feeling from her mind, not liking the uncertainty it brought with it.

"He has at that, and that's why I know this will work itself out," Hoss said, straightening his shoulders. He reached over and took the crutch from her. "Think you'll be able to get around with this once the doc let's you out of your bed?"

The girl recognized a change in subject whenever she heard one and she nodded in answer. Maybe when Joe came in, or even her pa, she figure the puzzle out until she could see the big picture. "Thank you, Hoss."

"Hop-Sing said your friend Amy came to see you."

Reminded of her friend's strange behaviour, Shannon sighed. "Yes. She was supposed to bring me some schoolwork to do here at home, but she forgot to give it to me before she left. It would have been better than having nothing to do."

"And here I thought you enjoyed reading," Adam said from the doorway. He leaned against the door frame. "I take it you're feeling better?"

Giving that question due consideration, Shannon let herself study her oldest brother. He seemed as unconcerned as ever, and she began to think, maybe, she was making a mountain over a molehill. "My head still hurts, and I'm sore all over," she said realizing she still hadn't answered. "But I don't feel as awful as yesterday."

"That's good," Adam said, straightening up. He walked in, pulled a chair over, and picked up the book she'd been trying to read. He settled in as though he had been invited to do so and opened the book. "Since there's time before supper, and Joe's still not back, I'll read to you for awhile. Maybe that won't bother your head."

As Adam began to read, Shannon found her attention wandering as she wondered where, exactly, Joe was.

Right before supper, Dr. Martin stopped by and, once he examined her, gave permission for the twelve year old to leave her bed the next morning. Shannon suspected he had timed it just right so he would be invited to stay for supper, which he did. She could hear her two oldest brothers and Pa laughing with their guest.

She knew when Joe went to his room, hearing his footsteps in the hallway and then the sound of his door closing. He didn't join the rest of the family for supper since she never heard him go past her door again. A little later, Shannon heard the heavier footsteps of Hoss go past, and Joe's door opened and closed.

"What has you looking so worried, sweetheart?" Ben asked as he entered. "I thought you would be asleep by now."

Sighing, Shannon shook her head. "What's going on, Pa?" she asked bluntly. Once she asked that, she couldn't seem to stop talking. "Joe hasn't been in all day, and Hoss looks worried. And Adam..." No, Adam looked as he ever did. "Hoss said there's going to be a fight about some land."

Ben sat on the edge of her bed and took her hand in his. "And I'll just bet you pestered him into telling you that much," he said. "Shannon, you know I would tell you the details if it were something you needed to know. Yes, there's a piece of land that we've had controversy with, and we're going to have to keep a man out there to keep the trees from being cut down."

"Someone wants your trees?"

"It's a little more complicated than that. Your brothers are and I will take care of it."

In the hallway, Joe's door creaked as it opened and then closed. Instead of heading back downstairs, Hoss went to his own room further down. Ben squeezed his daughter's hand to get her attention. "Shannon, has anything ever not worked itself out in the end?"

"No," she said reluctantly.

Leaning forward, Ben kissed her forehead. "You get some sleep, Shannon," he said. "You're going to need all your strength if you want to get around tomorrow. You want to put Hoss' crutch to good use, don't you?"

Feeling like her father was putting her off, Shannon glanced at the crutch where it leaned against the wall. "I hate feeling left out."

"Shannon, you'll understand when you're older. Now go to sleep." Ben rose, blew out the lamp and left the room.

Pouting at the darkness, Shannon crossed her arms.

It took Shannon hours to figure out how to maneuver around things with her crutch. The times she inadvertently put any weight on her right foot sent streaks of pain through her leg and once she went down all the way, crashing loudly on the floor. Hop-Sing, the only one at home, was quick to come help her up and get her started again.

At noon, Adam and Hoss returned to the house. Since it was Saturday, it was only a half day of work for them. They both went took turns in the washroom to clean up for the dance in Virginia City. Ben came in soon after and began working on the accounts. Of Joe, there was no sign.

The evening Shannon spent quietly with her father while her two oldest brothers rode to the dance. Forgetting her worry about Joe, the twelve year old girl learned the fine art of chess from Ben. She already knew the basics from Adam, but strategy was something she had struggled to grasp from her older brother.

Ben was more than happy to spend the time with her, as it wasn't often it was just him and his daughter. He put off the worries over the Truckee Strip as he taught Shannon the nuances of the game. He stayed up after the girl went to bed, though, waiting for his sons to return. It was late when they did, all three together.

Sunday morning meant the family headed into Virginia City for church. Joe chose to ride Cochise behind the buggy the rest of his family. Glancing back at him, Shannon could see the distraction in his eyes and wondered what he was thinking about.

The sure thing about a crutch is it garnered a lot of attention, even from ones who weren't closely acquainted with the Cartwright family. Shannon tried to stay close to her pa as women tried to pinch her cheeks and pat her on the head with words of advice. Miss Jones tried to discuss Shannon's condition with Adam, anxious to beg forgiveness for not keeping a closer watch on her charges.

Fortunately, the reverend called them all in before it got too far out of hand. Thankful to escape, Shannon sat next to her pa in the pew. Out of the corner of her eye, as she grew bored with the sermon, she saw Amy staring in her direction. Turning, Shannon mouthed 'What?' but Amy didn't react, and that's when Shannon realized Amy was staring at Joe.

Ben nudged her and gave her a stern look. Unsettled by the expression of absolute adoration she had seen, Shannon focused her gaze on the reverend but didn't hear a word of what was said.

The congregation milled around in the churchyard after the service was over. Climbing into the buggy was more difficult without one of her brothers to help her, but Shannon managed to do it. She sat there, waiting for the rest of her family. "Where did your brother go?" Amy asked, coming up to the buggy.

"Adam is talking to Sheriff Coffee, and Hoss is over there by Mrs. Kelly," Shannon responded, glancing over the yard. "Why?"

Amy huffed. "Not those brothers. Joe."

Another glance showed that Joe wasn't in sight. "I don't know," Shannon said. "I guess maybe he was walking a girl home."

"Oh. Well, I didn't see him at the dance last night and wondered if everything was alright."

"He was here today, wasn't he?" Shannon asked harshly. "My brothers keep themselves to themselves. You ought to know what that's like better than most."

"What's your problem?" Amy asked, her tone offended.

"Hello Amy, you're looking well," Ben said as he walked over. Anything Shannon might have said about her friend's sudden interest in Joe, she kept to herself. "No ill effects from climbing that tree?"

Smiling, Amy said, "Nope. I'm a little more careful than Shannon, I suppose."

A wave of betrayal swept over Shannon. "I'll see you in school, Amy."

"How are you going to get to school tomorrow?" Amy asked, not taking the hint to leave. "You can't ride with your ankle like that, can you?"

"One of her brothers will bring her in on the wagon," Ben answered. "She's not going to miss anything."

"Oh, good," Amy said, her eyes lighting up. "I'll see you later, Mr. Cartwright. Tell Joe I said hello."

Amy turned and ran back to her family. "What's that face for, Shannon?" Hoss asked as he climbed into the front seat of the buggy. "You look like you sucked on a lemon."

"Nothing," Shannon muttered, crossing her arms. "Where did Joe go?"

She didn't miss the way Hoss and her father exchanged glances. "He didn't say," was all Ben said, though.

The next morning, Shannon heard a loud commotion as she made her way down the stairs. Her oldest brother and her pa were already hurrying to the front door in response to Hoss' shouting, "Pa! Hey, Pa!"

"Lil' Missy come eat," Hop-Sing called from the table. "Brothers, father, already eat."

"In a minute, Hop-Sing," Shannon answered, trying to move quickly. She made it to the front door and pulled it open just a bit. Leaning her head against the crack, she closed her eyes and listened, unashamed to eavesdrop.

"Well, I didn't, that's the funny part about it," Hoss was saying. "That gate's shut tight and it's been shut tight."

Someone had been on their property overnight? Before the conversation could go any further, someone rode up. "What is it, Trump?" Ben asked, his tone impatient.

"They've set up a lumber camp on the strip," Trump announced, sounding out of breath. "They're sawing timber like mad."

Shocked, Shannon's eyes flew open and she covered her mouth with her hand.

"I warned them about that," Adam said, sounding disappointed.

"Warned them?" Trump repeated. "The only warning Bishop knows is killing."

Shannon shuddered at the bitterness in the man's voice. "We better get over there," her father said with no little concern. There was a pause. "Where's Little Joe?"

Hoss didn't know and then Adam said, "He said something about going out after strays."

"Seems to me there are more strays than usual running off. Be right with you, Trump."

Swiftly, Shannon recoiled from the door and managed to get halfway to the dining room table before Adam came through the door. He looked from her to the door and raised his eyebrows. "Hear anything interesting?" he asked.

"Not a thing," Shannon answered, keeping her face expressionless. "Why? Is something wrong?"

"You're a rotten liar, Shannon."

Ben was ignoring them both as he strapped on his gunbelt. "Shannon, there's something we have to take care of. One of the hands —Jud— will take you to school today. Hoss or J—Adam will pick you up this afternoon. Mind Miss Jones and stay out of trouble."

The slip of tongue wasn't lost on Shannon. Things were definitely not good if Ben didn't think he could rely on Joe to remember he needed to pick her up. "Yes, Pa." She bit the edge of her lip as she watched her family ride away.

"Lil' MIssy, stop worry and eat breakfast."

At Hop-Sing's order, Shannon shook herself and made her way to the table.

Amy's disappointment was clearly written on her face when she saw it wasn't Joe who dropped Shannon off. The fair haired girl didn't even attempt to be subtle in asking where Joe was, and took on a hurt, puzzled expression when Shannon sharply said she didn't know and quite frankly didn't care. Her nose in the air, Amy flounced away.

Unsurprisingly, Miss Jones kept Shannon inside for each recess, in order to 'keep her from hurting herself by straining her ankle.' The twelve year old could not wait for the day to end, but when she saw the sad look on Hoss' face she wasn't sure if home was where she wanted to be right then. "Hoss, what's wrong?"

"It wasn't exactly a good day," Hoss answered, lifting her up and setting her on the wagon seat. "Trump killed a kid out on the strip. And Pa says there's something eating away at Little Joe, something he can't share with the rest of us."

"Oh." Having nothing else to say to that, Shannon fell silent. She saw the disappointed way Amy watched the wagon roll away and scowled. The ride home was quiet with Hoss in a troubled mood and Shannon reflecting on how annoyed she was with her friend.

Joe didn't come in for supper, which was eaten quietly by the rest of the family. Ben constantly glanced at the clock. Adam brought down his guitar and played for an hour before he picked up a book. Hoss cleaned a rifle thoroughly, not saying anything. Glancing at a different member of her family every couple minutes, Shannon tried without much success to get through the schoolwork she had missed the day she didn't go to school.

When the grandfather clock struck nine, Ben opened the door and looked out. Not seeing anything, he closed the door and returned to the fireplace where Hoss was poking at the fire. "He should have been back by now," he said.

"He'll be back soon, Pa," Adam responded, only glancing up briefly from his book.

"Little Joe can take care of himself, Pa," Hoss added, his voice somber.

Ben heaved a sigh and shook his head. "Something's happened to him."

"Don't talk like that, Pa."

Frowning, Shannon glanced between them all. She figured the only reason she hadn't been sent to bed already is because her pa was so worried about Little Joe. No one had explained what had happened or why Joe hadn't come home. Not knowing, and seeing them all so concerned, was making her more and more uneasy.

The pounding of hoofbeats suddenly could be heard through the door. Hoss and Ben spun quickly, while Adam closed his book as sat up. "I-I think I'd like to talk to him alone," the Cartwright patriarch said. His gaze feel on Shannon. "And you, young lady, were supposed to be in bed an hour ago."

"I understand, Pa. Come on, Hoss," Adam said, standing up. "I'll make sure Shannon get's to bed."

"I'm not a child," Shannon complained.

Any other time, her complaint would have been acknowledged, but not this time. "Pa, you know he don't mean half of what he says," Hoss said.

"Come on, Hoss," Adam urged. He stayed behind his younger siblings, keeping them both moving up the stairs.

Just as she reached the top, Shannon heard the front door open and close. She started to turn, but Adam nudged her. "Keep moving," he said. "You're supposed to be getting more rest."

"But I haven't seen Joe all day," Shannon pointed out.

"You'll see him tomorrow. He and Pa need to have a talk."

Wrinkling her nose, Shannon shook her head. "Not if he goes riding off early to look for strays again."

"I thought you weren't eavesdropping this morning."

With an exaggerated groan, Shannon pushed her door open with her crutch. "You're impossible to talk to."

Adam chuckled and put his hand on the doorknob. "Good night, Shannon. I better not hear this door open."

Her plan of slipping out as soon as her brothers were in their rooms shattered, Shannon huffed as she shoved the door closed. Adam's hand kept it from slamming and he pulled it closed gently. Going to her bed, the girl fall back and stared up at the ceiling. She'd finally figured it out and was surprised why it had taken her as long as it had because it really wasn't difficult. She'd seen him behave this way before, and Adam and Hoss had too

There was a girl involved somehow.

Breakfast the next morning had none of the tension Shannon had sensed in the days before. Somehow, Joe and their pa had resolved their difference. Clearly relieved, Hoss put away twice what he had eaten the day before, earning teasing from both Adam and Joe while making Hop-Sing beam with pleasure.

"Jud is taking you to school today, Shannon," Ben said to his daughter. Before she could voice a protest, he continued, "I know one of your brothers is supposed to but we have business to discuss with Luther Bishop."

"About the Truckee strip?" Shannon asked apprehensively.

"Partly," Ben responded. "Never you mind what our business is, young lady, and worry about getting yourself to school."

School, where Amy would ask about Joe and try to get invited over after class ended for the day. "What's the frown about?" Adam asked, his sharp eyes seeing the change on his sister's face.

"Nothing!" Shannon snapped.

"Enough," Ben said sharply. "Shannon, you have to leave for school in a few minutes. Go get your books."

Nodding, Shannon stood up and made her way to the stairs. "Somedays that girl just don't make a lick of sense," Hoss commented.

"Well, she's not going to stay a little girl for much longer," Ben responded, lifting his coffee cup. "She's going to be a beautiful young lady before we know it."

"Pa, that is the last thing I want to think about."

"Will you give this to your brother for me?"

It was recess. A fight between two of the older boys meant that Shannon had been able to slip outside before Miss Jones could catch her. Now she slowly reached out and took the folded piece of paper. When she lifted her eyes, Amy was beaming with delight. That delight turned to horror as Shannon tore the note in half. "Shannon! Why did you do that?"

"I'm not a messenger."

"You could have just given it back to me!" Amy's blue eyes filled with tears. "Why are you being so mean?"

"Why are you being so stupid?"

"Stupid? I'm not being stupid!"

Curling her hand into a fist, Shannon crumpled the torn note and then threw it on the ground. "My brother is six years older than you," she said. "You mooning about like a lovesick puppy is ridiculous. You have to know you have no chance at getting him to notice you."

"Ha! Shows how much you know," Amy fired back. "My brothers told me they heard Joe say Amy is the prettiest girl in the territory."

For a split second, Shannon felt victorious that she'd guessed right. "You're not the only Amy in the territory, and certainly not the prettiest." Luthor Bishop had a daughter named Amy, didn't he? Was that where Little Joe had been disappearing to? He was courting the daughter of a man who was locked in battle over a piece of land?

"You're just jealous!" Amy accused, angrily shoving Shannon.

Falling back a step, Shannon was forced to put some weight on her sprained uncle until she could balance her crutch. "Jealous? Of what? You making cow-eyes at someone who is in love with another girl?"

Was that the business her pa had with Mr. Bishop? Resolving their differences over land for the sake of Joe's love for Amy Bishop? Did Mr. Bishop daughter even love Joe back? Amy's eyes widened. "You-you're lying!" the blonde haired girl said. "Everyone knows Joe hasn't looked seriously at a girl since Julia Bulette was killed."

Annoyed that her family's business was so well known, Shannon gritted her teeth. "Well, it's true," she snapped.

Amy's eyes were as round as saucers. "I don't believe you!" she said stubbornly. "You're making this up just to be mean."

"You know what? I don't care if you believe me or not," Shannon told her.

With a scowl, Amy spun and bolted away, right out of the schoolyard. Shannon turned and found that a small group of students were staring at her. "What are you looking at?" she asked, her tone sharp. Instantly, the children scattered.

Her ankle pained her as she made her way to the schoolhouse. A small sliver of guilt hit as she leaned against the building. She let her head lean back and she stared up at the sky. Maybe she ought to have approached it differently. Shannon gave a huff and closed her eyes. "I don't want to be in the middle of this."

"Everyone inside," Miss Jones called out.

Straightening up, Shannon went to the door. The teacher stopped her before she came in. "Shannon, where is Amy?"

"I don't know," Shannon said honestly. "She took off about five minutes ago."

Miss Jones shook her head. "Please go to your seat."

When Hoss drove the wagon up to the school, Amy hadn't returned to school. Ruthlessly shoving her feelings of guilt aside, Shannon said nothing of the matter. Even if she'd wanted to, she was distracted by the sorrow written on her brother's face. "Hoss?" she asked. "What happened? Did Mr. Bishop refuse to let Joe marry his daughter?"

"How did you know about that?"

"I guessed, and you didn't answer my question. Do I have to ask Joe?"

Hoss shook his head. "Shannon, when we get home, Joe isn't going to want to talk," he warned her. "There was...a accident today and Amy Bishop died."

"Oh."

Unsettled by the news and not exactly sure how she should feel about someone she hadn't met, Shannon considered how her brother must be feeling and so soon after he lost Julia Bulette. How could he stand it? She glanced over at Hoss, reminded he'd fallen in love with a dying woman himself. "Are Cartwrights cursed?" she asked when they were halfway home.

"That's a mighty strange question. What makes you think a thing like that?"

"Pa's wives all died," Shannon answered, choosing her words carefully. "Miss Crabtree left, and Joe's been in love twice now and it hasn't worked for him. And you—" She broke off and shook her head. "I don't know. It's a silly idea."

"Well, when you put it like that, I reckon a person might get to thinking negatively," Hoss said, keeping his eyes on the road. "But, you know, it hasn't all been bad. Pa'd tell you the same things he's told any of us when we've asked him: he wouldn't have any of us without our mas and he can't imagine that. As for the rest of us, well, sometimes bad things happen."

Sighing, Shannon leaned her head against him. "I suppose."

"Sometimes it might feel like we get more than our fair share of tragedy, that's for sure," Hoss continued. "But we can't focus on that, otherwise we'll start living life bitter-like."

Without lifting her head, Shannon nodded and thought about that the rest of the way home. When she entered the house, she saw Adam lounging in one of the chairs with a book. There was no sign of Joe, and Shannon's gaze went to the stairs. If he was upstairs, she could go and at least sit with him.

"No, Shannon," Adam said. "Pa's with him. Leave them alone."

Startled, the girl looked at him and then slowly made her way to where Adam was sitting. Without saying anything, he closed his book and straightened up. Shannon took that as invitation and sat on his lap, setting her crutch aside. With a sigh, she leaned her head against his shoulder.

"Bad day?" Adam asked, putting his arms around her.

"Something like that," Shannon answered. "Amy and I fought and she ran off." She didn't want to explain why she had argued with best friend though, so she quickly said, "Hoss said Joe had a bad day."

"Mm, you could say that," Adam said with a sigh. "What did you argue about with Amy Jackson?"

Was it because he was so much older or because, at least from what Hoss said, he was like a second father to joe, that he asked such questions. Shannon wasn't sure, but she did know she didn't want to tell him. "Girl stuff, I guess."

"Can you be more exact?"

"No."

At that moment, Ben came slowly down the stairs, holding his hand over his face. "Everything alright, Pa?"

Dropping his hand, Ben looked up and spotted his daughter. He forced half a smile. "Everything's fine. Joe won't be joining us for dinner," he replied. He walked to where the pair were sitting. "How was school, Shannon?"

"Better than what was happening here from what I've heard," Shannon answered. She reached her arms up.

Adam shook his head as Ben hoisted the girl up and hugged her. "Pa, she's getting to be too big for that," he pointed out.

"Adam, it's between me and Pa," Shannon said before Ben could respond.

With a chuckle, Ben set his daughter on her feet carefully. "Then I may as well take advantage of the time I have left where I can still pick her up," he said.

"Pa, Mr. Jackson is here," Hoss called as he opened the front door.

Surprised, Ben hurried to meet the man, who took off his hat as he entered. Shannon sat sideways on the settee and peeked over the back. "Mr. Jackson," her father said, holding his hand out. "What can I do for you?"

"I was hoping I would find my Amy here," the man responded. "She didn't come home from school."

Shannon ducked her head down as Ben turned. "Shannon? Did Amy say anything to you before you left?"

"Amy said a lot of things the last time I saw her," Shannon muttered. Her cheeks flushed as Adam raised his eyebrow at her. She cleared her throat and pulled herself up to look at her friend's father. "Amy got mad at me and ran off during recess. She didn't tell me where she was going and she didn't come back. We all assumed that she went home."

Mr. Jackson shook his head. "I don't know what's going on in that girl's head," he said. "I'd expect this sort of thing from one of my boys but not Amy. Sorry to have bothered you folks."

"Do you need some help looking?" Hoss asked.

"I'd sure appreciate it."

At Ben's glance, Adam rose. "We know the area around the school fairly well," he said. "Goodness knows Hoss scoured every inch for a mile all around the school last year."

Reminded of being kidnapped and subsequently being trapped in an abandoned mine shaft overnight, Shannon shuddered. She waited until her father went out to watch his two sons ride off and then reached over to pick up the book Adam had been reading. It was Romeo and Juliet by William Shakespeare.

Glancing around, Shannon slipped it under her own schoolbooks to take up to her room with her later.

Hop-Sing grumbled when he was forced to put most of the food away to keep warm for when Hoss returned. Joe didn't appear downstairs and the tray of food the cook took up to him came back untouched. It was only after she swore she would leave her brother alone that Ben allowed Shannon to go up to her room to do her homework.

By the light of her lamp, Shannon finished the work Miss Jones had assigned to her. She heard when Ben came up and went to Joe's room, and she heard when he returned downstairs, walking much slower than when he came up. Unable to concentrate, she pushed aside her McGuffey reader and reached for Adam's book.

She opened Romeo and Juliet to the first page and began to read. Her forehead creased in a frown as she read of the feud between the Capulets and Montagues, how Romeo loved first Rosalind but then fell in love with Juliet. She reached the page her brother had marked:

O, she doth teach the torches to burn bright!

It seems she hangs upon the cheek of night

Like a rich jewel in an Ethiop's ear—

Beauty too rich for use, for earth too dear.

So shows a snowy dove trooping with crows

As yonder lady o'er her fellows shows.

The measure done, I'll watch her place of stand

And, touching hers, make blessèd my rude hand.

Did my heart love till now? Forswear it, sight,

For I ne'er saw true beauty till this night.

"What are you reading, Shannon?"

Startled by her father's question, the girl looked up. "Oh, hi Pa," she said. "I didn't hear you come in."

A smile played on Ben's face. "I can see that," he answered. "Adam and Hoss are back."

For a split second, Shannon considered asking where Amy had been found. The idea that maybe they hadn't found her friend didn't even come to mind. "That's good."

Ben raised his eyebrow at that and sat on the bed beside her. "Hoss found Amy. She'd climbed up into that old tree you fell out of last week, couldn't figure out how to get back down, and was too stubborn to call for help," he explained. "She's safely home now."

Holding back a sigh of relief, Shannon dropped her gaze to the book in her hands. "You didn't answer my question, Shannon. What are you reading?" Ben asked.

"Just something Adam had downstairs," she said evasively. "And I was just looking."

Raising his eyebrow, Ben took the book from her and read the title with a sigh. "Romeo and Juliet. I can understand why he would pick this up now." He focused on Shannon. "You seemed intent on it for just looking at it."

"I suppose I was hoping it would help me understand stuff," Shannon admitted, entwining her fingers together. "Miss Jones says it's the greatest love story in literature."

"I see. And you thought you could understand—what exactly?"

Embarrassed, Shannon dropped her gaze. "I don't know," she answered. "What it really means to love someone, romantically, like Joe loves Amy and A—." She broke off before she could finish the sentence.

Her father chuckled. "Like your friend Amy loving Joe, you mean."

Shannon jerked her gaze up. "How did you know that?"

Closing the book, Ben set it aside. "It wasn't hard to miss," he answered. "And if Joe hadn't been caught up with Amy Bishop, he'd have seen it too, just like Adam and Hoss did."

Groaning, Shannon pulled her pillow over and buried her face in it. "Adam and Hoss know too?"

"It's nothing to be ashamed of, Shannon," Ben said, patting her shoulder. "Your friend isn't the first and certainly won't be the last girl to think herself in love with Joe."

"But why did she think she loved him in the first place?" Shannon asked, lifting her head. "Joe didn't set out to make her like him and she's not older than me. Why all if the sudden did she think the sun rose and set with him?"

"Because she's growing up, same as you are," Ben answered, his tone soothing. "It may not make sense to you now, but one day it will."

Firmly, Shannon shook her head. "How can I when it makes no sense? What makes one person have feelings for another person so quickly? Why did Joe fall in love with Julia Bulette and Amy Bishop, or what made Hoss fall in love with Emily Pennington in a day? Why did you ask Miss Menken to marry you?"

Startled by his daughter's vehement questions, Ben stared at her for a moment. "Love is like that sometimes," he said, choosing his words carefully. "It happens so quickly a person can't explain how it happened. It's not something you can learn from a book or from someone telling you. You have to feel it and experience for yourself."

"So Amy really fell in love with Joe just because he rescued her from the tree."

Flinching, Ben shook his head. "Your friend would tell you it was love, and infatuation, a child's crush, is a kind of love. It doesn't last though. Joe's infatuation with Miss Bulette was real to him, but he recovered from that quickly enough."

"Well, then, how will I ever know the difference between real love and infatuation?"

This was not a conversation Ben expected to have with his twelve year old daughter. "With time," he told her. "If it lasts heartache and trials, it's real."

Squeezing her pillow tightly, Shannon closed her eyes. "Then, my mother didn't really love you? Her love wasn't enough to keep her here with you."

For a moment, Ben too closed his eyes. When it came to emotions, Shannon somehow always managed to bring it around to her mother. Not for the first time, the Cartwright patriarch felt regret and guilt that her childhood had such that she would feel the need to always question love. If he had rightfully gotten her when she was born, could this have been avoided? He would always wonder.

"Darling, we cannot know how your mother really felt. We do know that she loved you enough to know the Ponderosa was where you belonged. She had enough love in her to recognize the love I had for my family. I love you dearly and so do your brothers."

He reached over and pulled his only daughter into a hug. "I don't think I'll ever understand this romantic love thing," Shannon said after a few moments. "Romeo and Juliet behavior was stupid."

"Shannon, as your father, I am terribly relieved to hear you say that," Ben told her with a chuckle. "But when you're older, you'll understand."

"Always when I'm older. I don't think I'm ever going to be old enough."

"There's plenty of time for you to grow up. Don't let it happen too soon."

When Shannon entered the schoolroom the next morning, Amy wouldn't look at her. Her friend was also sitting on the desk chair gingerly as though her backside was paining her. Amy's father had not kept from a punishment for running away. Sympathetically, Shannon sat next to her friend.

"I'm sorry I called you stupid," she whispered as Miss Jones called for school to begin.

There was a pause. "It's ok," was all Amy responded. But it was enough.

At midday, in the middle of Virginia City, the stagecoach came to a stop. The driver jumped down and quickly opened the door. "Let me help you down, ma'am," he said, holding his hand out.

A woman's gloved hand accepted the driver's hand. "Thank you," she said, a purr in her voice. She exited the stagecoach and glanced around up and down the street. "Well, I didn't think I would ever see this town again."

"Oh, so you've been to Virginia City before? Does something in particular bring you back?"

Scarlet Mallory smiled. "Business, good sir. Business."