Masquerade
Disclaimer: Oh Gawd, I gotta stop doing these. LOL. And yet...somehow I can't seem to do so. If you guys ever get tired of these, let me know. I have MANY ideas involving other pairings, but this one I'm particularly stuck on. But stay tuned. With a devoted fanbase, I tend to be much more motivated to do these a lot. :) Now granted, this was a series of ideas that I originally had for my fic NEVER WILL BE, but didn't work out for the intended plot. So this one will be an AU fic that will work around an alternate version of the whole events of Animated involving Shockwave. So. Yup. There you have it. I promise there won't me too much sadness this time. :)
"A single lie destroys a whole reputation for integrity."
-Baltasar Gracian
"A lie does not consist in the indirect position of words, but in the desire and intention, by false speaking, to deceive and injure your neighbour."
-Jonathan Swift
By: VampireQueenAkasha
"...all that unpleasant morality."
-Shockwave, Transformers Animated
Crossing the Line
Cybertron
Red Alert cautiously stepped into the room Jhiaxus directed her to. She spotted Shockwave standing at a table, going through several containers of liquid, seemingly studying the samples as if it were his prime duty. When he heard the door open, he paused and glanced back slightly. His optic flickered with a hidden emotion before he resumed his task without so much as an acknowledgement to her. Red Alert cautiously smiled.
"Hey," she said.
Shockwave's hand paused from reaching for a vial before he sighed. His voice came out gruff. "I told Jhiaxus not to tell you where I was."
"He seems to do his own thing," Red Alert replied, feeling an uncomfortable change in the air.
Shockwave didn't say anything. The only sounds that followed were the clinking of bottles.
Red Alert's brow knotted at his silence. "Are you just going to be silent?" she asked.
"It has served me properly in the past," he said, in a biting tone.
They were silent again and Red Alert took a careful step closer. "I don't understand why-" she began.
"What I don't understand, Red Alert," Shockwave began, an edge creeping into his voice; he still kept his back to her, "Is why you feel any sort of need to speak with me at all. You have your point abundantly clear in the sewer that you wanted nothing more to do with me."
Red Alert shook her head. "I was angry, Shockwave. I thought if I explained myself-"
"No," he interrupted again, his voice somewhat calmer and resigned, "There is no need for you to do anything of the sort. I will admit that I was the foolish one from the very beginning. I had broken my own caveat and pursued more than my mission. And it was clearly more than what I was able to have. I was ignorant and attempted something that I should have known would never follow properly into place."
Red Alert's brow knotted. "So it was all a lie then? What you said?"
Shockwave simply kept his back to her, as if her words were of no consequence.
"I never said it was a lie, Red Alert," he answered, "All I say is that I was wrong to try and reason with you."
Red Alert looked angry now, but because he was being purposely obtuse. "I was angry," she insisted, "Oh Primus, do you realize how you hurt me? You lied and ripped my spark out!" Then, she realized her error and sighed, rubbing her forehead. "You know what? I don't want do this any more. I don't want to do any more 'who did what to whom'." She sighed and didn't see that Shockwave paused to look back at her for a moment. "Ever since this happened, I've been trying to make sense out of it."
He sighed. "Don't. It's meaningless."
Red Alert's optics narrowed and she squinted at him in disbelief, tilting her head to one side in a gesture that made it seem she hadn't heard him correctly. "Meaningless?" she whispered, her voice shocked and dripping with anger now, "My feelings are meaningless? What we had was meaningless? Everything that has nothing to do with you is meaningless then, is it? You think Autobots are so arrogant, but I don't know who's the bigger liar here."
Suddenly, Shockwave slapped one of the vials onto the table that he held. He whirled on her and moved so quickly into her personal space, she jumped back from him with a slight cry of surprise and backed up against the wall. The look he gave her with that single optic didn't reflect much emotion, but it burned with such poison, she almost withered beneath it. His voice took on a harder note than she had ever heard him capable of.
"Don't ever lecture me on the merits of emotion!" he hissed, "I risked my life on Cybertron, more than any Autobot can ever boast!"
Red Alert's fear disappeared and was replaced with frustration now. "How do you EXPECT me to react?" she shouted, "You came around charming me. Then you turn the tables, stick a knife in my back and expect me to take it like it was nothing? I honestly thought I meant something to you!"
"You meant something to LONG ARM, not me," Shockwave spat.
"They're both the same person!"
"They are not!"
They were shouting now, taking no mind to who could hear them.
"How do you think it makes me feel?" Red Alert demanded, "Do you want to know? When you showed me who you really were in those sewers, I was angry, but I was also scared. Do you know why? I was scared because even though I saw you for who you really were, I STILL felt something for you! Despite the lies and the betrayal, the feelings stayed the same! Do you have any idea what that was like for me?"
Shockwave leaned his head back slightly, taken aback for a few split seconds before there was a blunt way his optic flashed.
"You lie." he growled, his voice as cold as ice.
"You're one to be throwing the liar card around!" Red Alert shot back.
Shockwave sounded on the verge of completely losing it. "I am being realistic!"
"No, you're being a hypocrite! You just said it was meaningless!"
"I LIED!" Shockwave suddenly roared.
Red Alert blinked and her optics widened in shock. The shout had carried to Hot Shot and Jhiaxus in the infirmary where the young Autobot was being tended to. Jhiaxus just smiled at a surprised Hot Shot and chuckled.
"I think it's going well, don't you?" Jhiaxus asked.
O
Red Alert noticed that Shockwave hadn't moved after that outburst. He stood over her, staring down at the floor around their feet, clearly ashamed of what he had just said. For a while, he had said nothing afterwards. His optic seemed unseeing, lost in a place that wasn't currently reality. She was uncertain about speaking, but the silence was killing her and she reluctantly opened her mouth, but closed it again with an audible click.
"Shockwave?" she said, worried.
He stepped back from her, hissing out his next words as if he were deathly sick. "Primus damn you," he whispered, and it wasn't actually clear if he was specifically cursing her or himself, "Primus damn you..."
Red Alert didn't know what to do, but she slowly reached up with one hand and rested it against the side of his helm. She tensed slightly, preparing for backlash, but Shockwave didn't move when she touched him. Any reaction would have been better than this excruciating muteness. She slipped a hand beneath his "chin" and lifted his head slightly to look at her. He met her gaze and his optic darkened now. He studied her features silently, trying to understand her.
She stared back, her optics filled with a mixture of confusion, uncertainty and bare intrigue. When he raised his arm, she thought she was going to be pushed away, called terrible things and forced from the room. Shockwave did neither one of those things. He brought one of those claws to her neck and Red Alert couldn't resist the urge to stare down at the sharp digit. She waited for it to inflict harm, but instead, he ran it lightly up and down her neck.
Shockwave cursed himself over and over in his head for this. He cursed Primus and every single thing that came to his processor.
Red Alert's hands moved then, feeling that his touching her granted a silent permission to do so to him. Her fingers were practically softer than the lightest gusts of air as she moved them toward the lengthy antenna, carefully brushing them. Shockwave's claw had frozen beside her neck and he was still. She leaned up and placed a timid kiss against the side of his helm. For whatever reason, Shockwave didn't know. But despite the unease in her touch, he couldn't stop the shiver that ran down his spinal relay.
"You can make it stop, Shockwave," Red Alert said, leaning her forehead against his, "You can make your own life."
"I don't have any other choice..."
Red Alert tensed and shook her head. "That's a lie! You've always had a choice! It's all been your choice!" she told him, "You chose to work for Megatron, chose to betray us, and now you've chosen to give him control over you. Everything that has happened up until this point has always been your own choice."
Shockwave didn't reply. He just stared into her optics for a moment before glancing down with a heavy sigh. "In those passing days, I've thought of you," he said, quietly, "My mission was to manipulate you, to use you as I saw fit. But then..." He paused and let out another sigh. Red Alert almost heard a smile in his voice. ALMOST. "You became this happy dream. This strange, illogically satisfying dream in a life that was nothing but a nightmare." Shockwave paused again and his voice was lower now, like an old engine that wouldn't turn over. "I know they were a lie, but those cycles that I spent with you...were the only good days that I have ever had in my entire life..."
Red Alert stared at him, these words that he revealed to her. A small whisper in her head told her he could be lying again, but the majority of her wanted to believe otherwise. Someone like him would never stand here in his true form and reveal this when he had no reason to do so.
"Shockwave..." she replied, in an even, yet slightly disconsolate tone; she cupped his helm and lifted his head to look at her, "All I know is that whoever Long Arm was, he made me happy. But that's not enough. It's not just about me. It's about you too. I just want you to be happy, whatever choice you make. If you're happy with Megatron, then I can be happy for you." She smiled sadly and her optics appeared to brim. "I don't know what my spark is doing and it scares me; but when you touched me, held me and kissed me..." She laughed sorrowfully. "And even when we had our off days...everything still made sense."
Shockwave had been silent the entire time, watching her. When she finished, that slit in his optic narrowed as she parted from him before leaving the room. He didn't know how long it was that he spent there in that same position.
O
Red Alert walked to the room where Hot Shot was being held and took a moment to wipe her optics before pausing in the doorway. She blinked in surprise. Jhiaxus had Hot Shot by the arm and was bending it in several places. Hot Shot gave a cry of mild pain before Jhiaxus smiled at him.
"Better?" he asked.
Hot Shot blinked and let his arm hang limply before he laughed. "I'll be slagged," he remarked, "It actually worked."
Jhiaxus chuckled. "You are most welcome, Hot Shot," he told him, "There are few problems that old fashioned Cybertronian acupressure will not solve." He glanced up when he saw Red Alert and gave her a small smile.
"How did it go?" he asked.
Red Alert sighed and rubbed her forehelm. "Not as well as it could have."
Jhiaxus smile disappeared and he took a deep inhale. "Well, that's unfortunate," he replied, "But it will all come together eventually."
Red Alert looked at him sadly. "I'm not sure that it will," she argued, "You know how he is. How he can be."
Jhiaxus looked mildly guilty for that, though he still smiled. "I can take the blame for that too."
Hot Shot frowned inquisitively at the conversation between them and looked up at Jhiaxus with a bare hint of intrigue on his face. "Hey, mind filling me in on what's going on between doc and Cyclops?"
"No." Jhiaxus told him, "Now why don't you go and find something to drink? I'm sure you need it."
Hot Shot smiled broadly. "Will there be top of the line high-grade?"
"Indeed."
"Then I will definitely take you up on that."
Hot Shot jumped down from the table and sauntered out of the room, whistling a cheerful tune before he almost bumped into Shockwave. He tensed for a moment before rolling his optics with disgust and impatience.
"Well, look who just stalked out of the scrapheap," he mocked. "Don't you have some poor, defenseless scraplings to disembowel?"
"Where is Red Alert?" Shockwave demanded.
Hot Shot snorted. "Away from you if she has any sense," he shot back, "My friend has no need to associate with the likes of you."
"Continue to press the buttons and you will be her late friend," Shockwave threatened in an icy voice. "I do not take kindly to idiocy."
Hot Shot laughed skeptically. "I doubt that," he sneered; he paused before putting his hands on his hips, "You're like a computer; you don't laugh, cry or smile. You have ONE EYE," He bugged out one of his optics comically to emphasise his point, "ONE big gun and ONE nut-sized processor. You're always alone and always will be because everyone is putt-off by the big, one-eyed freak." His brow knotted and he completely turned the subject around. "Everything is ONE with you. Why is everything one with you?"
Shockwave was silent, staring at him with a glimmer of annoyance in his optic.
"What?" Hot Shot mocked, "Did I hit it on the dot?"
"No. I was simply too taken by your stupidity to process a proper response," Shockwave snapped.
He brushed passed the Autobot and continued forward without so much as asking any other questions further.
O
As the Shepherd passed silently through space, several Elite Guard Ships appeared through a single space bridge, moving toward the ship. Jhiaxus stood at the center of the bridge, confused for a brief moment by their presence, but the moment of confusion did not last long nor did it register on his face.
"Lord Jhiaxus, the Elite Guard ships have us locked on," the same bot from before said, "And we're receiving a transmission."
Jhiaxus' optics narrowed. "Put it on the main screen."
An image of an Elite Guard trooper appeared; Jhiaxus recognized the sneering face as Stratos. He was gold around his shoulders, arms, and face and pale blue in the rest of his body. He was adorned on his arms with markings that he used as a person count of how many Decepticons he had captured personally. He was an older Elite Guard member who had often attempted to hunt him down, despite his "peace-keeping" with the Elite Guard. Stratos did not approve of letting Jhiaxus continue to go about what he believed was "illegal Cybertronian trafficking". Jhiaxus had often attempted to explain that was NEVER his purpose, but Stratos always made it his point to continue his hunt.
"Stratos," Jhiaxus acknowledged, "To what do I owe this honor?"
"My sources tell me that you are harboring a Decepticon fugitive on board your ship," Stratos told him, "I'm feeling generous today; so if you relinquish him to us, you'll crawl out of this without so much as a scratch."
Jhiaxus calmly shook his head. "This is a sanctuary for the lost and wretched and soon, we will make way for my planet," he said, "There is nothing and no one here for you to take however you please. Please, leave quietly."
Stratos chuckled coldly. "Yeah, afraid I can't do that. Sentinel made it very clear he wants him."
"You are aware of our agreement, Stratos," Jhiaxus reminded him, his optics darkening, "Once any Autobot or Decepticon is brought to my vessel, they are under protection from anyone and anything seeking to kill them." He paused, watching Stratos' features cloud, as if he was caught doing something he shouldn't have. "You and I both know that will happen. Sentinel is a brash creature who thinks of no one but himself." He sighed quietly. "This is our home. Leave us in peace."
"Can't do that, Jhiaxus," Stratos said again; he grinned nastily, "See, I have a special spot on my arm just for you. Bringing you in after so many runs will make it that much sweeter. And dragging in those traitors will no doubt double the bonus."
Now Jhiaxus was angry. Those around him whispered and murmured with unease and seeing his people at fear for the fault of one arrogant bot was enough to draw the line with him.
"How dare you persist in intruding upon our haven," he hissed, "You have turned against us and left us in exile! Is that not punishment enough?"
Stratos chuckled. "I guess not." He looked beyond Jhiaxus. "All ships...OPEN FIRE!"
Immediately, the Elite GUard ships unleashed a barrage of laser fire directly for the Shepherd. Jhiaxus reacted swiftly, turning attention to a bot beside him. Even during a moment of chaos, his thoughts immediately went elsewhere for a moment. A brief, pained moment that carried grief for the continued abuse fate wrought. Primus...what more can you possibly do to us? How long must we weather this cruel fate? "Shields up, now!" he bellowed.
The Shepherd's shield was up instantly, the laser blasts incinerated. Though the attack continued relentlessly, jolting everyone within. Jhiaxus himself remained calm; he had to for his people who relied on him for protection.
"My Lord, multiple decks are reporting damages!" a bot cried.
The Shepherd was rocked violently and through it, Red Alert staggered down the corridors, confused and terrified.
"Primus, what the frag is going on?" she demanded, reaching a monitor.
Hot Shot was almost brutally thrown backwards and gripped a pipe. "Why?" he growled, in a voice of frustration and protest; even a glimmer of unease, "Why is Primus choosing this day to frag with our processors?"
A holographic monitor lit up and Red Alert attempted to reach someone in the bridge. "What's going on up there?" she shouted.
Jhiaxus looked at her rigidly. "We are under attack by the Elite Guard."
"My Lord, the hull integrity is at 67 percent!" a bot off-screen yelled, "I'm getting casualty reports in the maintenance deck!"
Jhiaxus nodded his head gravely before he looked at Red Alert. His optics were filled with regret. "I must protect my people, Red Alert; even if it means I have to resort to ending the lives of the Elite Guard troopers. Forgive me."
Red Alert shook her head frantically. "Let me speak to them! They know who we are!"
"They are beyond speaking."
Red Alert looked up at Hot Shot desperately. "Hurry on! I'll make my way to the maintenance deck and see what I can do to help!" When Hot Shot rushed off, Red Alert looked back at Jhiaxus. "Please, there has to be another way!"
Jhiaxus genuinely looked remorseful. "My ship is being torn apart and my people threatened. There is no other solution," he replied, "I attempted peace and failed. Now I must use force. I'm so sorry, Red Alert."
And with that, he ended the conversation and looked at the bots waiting an order.
"Prepare the Redeemer."
The bots in the room looked surprised for a moment before they nodded gravely.
"Yes, Lord Jhiaxus." they said.
O
Red Alert ran frantically down the corridors. She stopped long enough to reach another monitor and immediately contacted the maintenance deck. A frightened, filthy Decepticon responded to her hail and behind him, various machinery sparked.
"We need to get a grasp on this situation, now!" he bellowed, "I've got seventeen wounded down here!"
The ship jolted again, nearly knocking Red Alert off of her feet. Tubes and pipes ruptured and one dislodged, flying directly for her. She failed to see it as she straightened and then, a shadow moved behind her.
A loud, wet snap filled the air. Red Alert turned and her optics widened in horror.
Shockwave stood there, his body loomed over her. His abdomen was soaked with his own Energon and the pipe had almost completely punched through his body. Energon began to drip and slide down the length of the protrusion as well as from the mouth-slots on his chin.
Red Alert couldn't move. She couldn't breathe.
"Shockwave?" she gasped.
His optic was wide, unseeing before he swayed. Red Alert immediately slipped her arms beneath him and caught him before he fell. She dropped to her knees and felt her whole world going in slow motion. The explosions outside of the ship seemed to move without sound. She didn't even hear her own scream as she shrieked for Jhiaxus over the computer monitor.
Meanwhile, the Elite Guard ships had all but stopped firing. They frowned in confusion at the lack of retaliation.
"Heh," Stratos sneered, "I guess he's not the Decepticon warlord they say he is."
"Stratos, look!" a bot in another ship said.
The fascination from his friend confused and intrigued Stratos, so he did indeed stare at the Shepherd, watching as the underbelly of the ship began to cast various small lights of a dark, green hue. Stratos tilted his head slightly as a thin line of light emitted from it, splitting as if it were parting in half. The Elite Guard troopers were entirely too entranced by this beautiful light to make any further moves. It was strange how the light gave them a bizarre sense of relaxation, almost as if they were under a trance.
"It's beautiful..." another Elite Guard trooper whispered through Stratos' link.
Stratos' optics flickered with green and he was completely entranced. The ship's lights seemed to have a hold on him now. No longer did he feel like fighting. No longer did he feel like attacking anyone. He just felt...happy. He failed to see an enormous schism opening at the bottom of the Shepherd; white, beautiful light spilled out. It produced a wicked, gnarled gun that was in no way a figment of beauty or peace. It was jagged, producing various blades and edges.
Then, with a loud roar, the gun separated into two pieces, the light amplifying itself. At that precise moment, the beautiful light that had entranced the Elite Guard troopers disappeared, snapping them out of their haze for a split second. Stratos looked around.
"What-?" he began.
In that same second, the light was replaced with a powerful, bright red blast. It came upon the trooper's ships, splintering them into millions of tiny particles that shattered to the stars. The crew on board the Shepherd watched the scene with mixed emotions. Jhiaxus observed the destruction with sadness in his optics and the rest were too stunned to offer any form of input at all.
"It is done," he finally said.
O
Note-So no one freaks out, trust me. Shockwave's going to live. LOL.