Chapter 10 – Greatest Passion and Desire
Monday 5th October 2009
Beverly Hills'
My Bedroom – 10 pm
I fell heavily down onto my bed feeling fatigue take over my body.
Monday's are always the tiring days, it's the start of the week and the first lesson to be is Algebra…What can be worse than that?
Well the fact that I choked right in front of Jesse, that's worse right?
It's been a while now that I've realized the reason my heart would skip a beat in his presence was because I've developed at crush on him. Jesse Di Silva is the guy I felt new feelings for, the guy that made my cheeks burn up especially with his perverted attitude. The golden guy of SM Beverly is my perverted prince, the heartthrob and the most talented of all students. Every girl dreams to be with him whereas every guy dreams to be him.
He can be such a jerk at times always getting me into trouble…But then he'll always save me in the end, 'what he starts is what he finishes' he's said that many times too.
The word 'crush' is new to me, an emotion that I never felt before I met Jesse. And I was totally 'crushed' when he caught me staring at him. He was surrounded by a large group of people in the corridor, and I was leaning back against my locker standing next to Carter, who was on the phone with someone.
Jesse laughed turning his head and his eyes locked with me and in an instant I choked on my bagel,
"Suze," Carter hung up and held onto me, "Are you alright?"
"I…Fine," I quickly turned my back to Jesse feeling myself turn red,
Carter rolled his eyes frowning when realizing the reason for me choking, but before he could say anything the bell rang for first period and I sighed parting from Carter then made my way through the busy crowd to Algebra.
Paul Slater was already seated in class. As I took my seat next to his, I noticed a crutch. My eyes went down to his left foot that was casted,
"It's fine really," He spoke up watching my nervous expression, "I lost control in the corner, my body was floating in the air and then it went dark. I opened my eyes and I was in a hospital with a cast. It'll be better in a couple of day's time,"
I smiled at him hesitantly nodding my head,
Paul Slater the second stud of our school is seated next to me in my algebra class, which makes a lot of girls glare and me and look my way with envious expressions which is amusing. I don't see how you can be jealous seeing someone who isn't yours with someone else.
And Paul although we're not friends he's always very nice to me, and even helps me with algebra during class.
"I'm training for the grand pix this year," he told me, "It's going to be huge! My partner Greg is pretty sick too, we'll surely win, even if our opponent is Jesse Di Silva,"
"Best of luck," I looked down into my text book. Just the smallest mention of Jesse Si Silva makes me feel uneasy. An emotion I don't understand.
Algebra went slowly as usual with me scribbling in my diary and Mr. Tanger constantly reminding me that I need a minimum C average if I want to keep my position in the leader board. He offered me after school one to one classes but I couldn't agree to it because this week I'm really busy with Heidi and her upcoming wedding.
After Algebra Social Sciences was a breeze, since Jesse was excused from class by Coach Geller I concentrated on the lecture given by Mrs. McGinnis. It was really interesting, learning about the goddess of freedom, Liberas.
After seeing my sketch of the statue of liberty Mrs. McGinnis decided we should learn about the history of New York. Moreover, the statue of liberty itself.
During Homeroom, Mrs. McGinnis asked me to go get my most recent sketch of the statue which I had kept in art class. I was more than happy to go and fetch it, not wanting to be around Jesse.
Once I got to Art class Ms. Tanner started to explain a new project to me,
"You have to find something you desire, something that makes you feel passionate, something you know will make a great tour de force," Ms. Tanner said, "It will be your first project and this will be submitted to the board,"
"But-
"Of course throughout the year you will have time to perfect your master piece," She answered my question before it was even asked, "Everyone's work will be displayed at the end of term and that would be a great opportunity for your work to be appreciated by the critics and your peers,"
Back in Homeroom I picked up a pencil and started drawing onto a piece of paper. I thought about what Ms. Tanner had said a lot. "Something you desire" "Something that makes you feel passionate,"
I hadn't the slightest of clue what I was drawing, however I loved the result.
It was a mother holding a child. Just a rough sketch but it looked pretty good…Something that I have always desired,
"I thought you would draw Jesse," Ceecee chuckled at lunch,
I nudged her folding up the piece of paper,
"Adam," Carter nodded,
"Hey guys," He smiled yawning slightly as he kissed the back of Ceecee's head taking his seat next to her,
"Adam what do you think of this?" Ceecee took my sketch and showed it to him,
He took it into his hands and studied it carefully,
"This is amazing," He said a little while later, "Suze this is amazing,"
"Thanks," I smiled taking it back from him,
Adam is great guy and he loves Ceecee so much. I watch the two look at each other with sure loving expressions and warmness. It's wonderful that he forgave her and is now supporting her. They are so lucky to have each other; she was so incomplete without him the morning after the disastrous party and was falling all over the place but one small smile from him made the world's difference to her.
And now we're such good friend. Adam doesn't spend as much time with the jocks, and popular students than he does with me, Ceecee and Carter. It's because he wants to protect Ceecee, she tells me,
Protection from the man you love sounded like the most amazing thing I've ever heard,
"Protection from the man you love," Gina repeated after me, "That sounds beautiful,"
"It does doesn't it," Heidi smiled at me, "Our Suze always comes up with such beautiful and amazing thoughts,"
"It's just something I observed," I smiled picking up my books, "I'm going to my room,"
"Alright honey you go and rest in your room and, I'll call you down when your dad gets home," Heidi said
I went to my room and put on an apron. I adjusted my easel and sat in front of it smiling at the thought of having protection from the man you love, it sounded great and I wanted to put it onto paper but I didn't know how, how could I express such a thought? How could I let the feeling flow through me?
It wasn't something I've ever felt so I couldn't ink it from my mind to the large blank paper. I thought about my assignment instead and thought of sketching my mother-child sketch on a larger scale but I couldn't find the piece of paper.
I checked my bag, my books and all pockets but I couldn't find it and the image was very vague in my mind. I should have been more careful with it.
"Suze," Dad came into my room, "Honey I called you so many times, is everything ok?"
"Oh I'm sorry, I didn't hear you," I hugged him, "Yes everything is alright, just we're doing an assignment in art and I sketched something and now I can't find it,"
"Have you checked your stuff?" he asked
"I checked everywhere, I probably dropped it," I sighed
"Aww its ok," He kissed my forehead, "You'll work it out. Now let's go down for dinner,"
"Ok," I smiled
…..
Tuesday 6th October 2009
Ladies room – 1 pm
"Hey" Carter switched the lights on in the dark room,
"Oh hi," I quickly unclipped a few embarrassing photographs and hid them under a newspaper,
"I thought you'll be here," Carter said holding up my camera, "What camera is this?"
"It's the D40, including Flash off mode that shuts off the camera's flash and boosts its ISO so users can easily take pictures in places where flash photography is not allowed or is not appropriate, another option would be to get naturally lit pictures, it even has advanced controls," I told him as I carefully unclipped a few other not embarrassing photographs,
"What are the advanced controls?" he asked curiously,
"Aperture-priority and Shutter-priority modes that present greater creative control over the look and feel of the pictures that are taken from the camera," I said
"That's cool," He said, "I was given free period. So I thought I'll come by,"
"You thought well," I nodded smiling at him,
"Suze!" Mr. Wesley came in, "I need you to do something for me,"
"I'll be in the library ok," Carter informed me before heading out,
"Take your camera and go to the football practice. I want you to take photographs of the game," He told me,
I gulped thinking of Jesse,
"It's for the school paper," He said, "After you've taken them I want you to develop them for me,"
I nodded,
"Consider it an assignment," He patted my shoulder before leaving,
I got my bag and then picked up my camera. I then made my way to the bleachers and bumped into Brad,
"Trying out for cheerleading eh?" He winked
"Shut up," I punched his arm laughing softly, "As if!"
"Then what are you doing here?" he asked bending down to tie his laces, "Not trying out for football are you?"
"I'm here to take photographs," I frowned looking around,
My eyes rested on Kelly, Debbie and Katie. Their eyes were glued to me, glaring at me while Brad spoke to me,
They have no clue he's my brother something I find amusing, they glare for no reason at all, because the chances of anything happening between me and him are zilch! I mean that'll just be disgusting!
"Mr. Wesley told me to," I said raising the camera to my face, "Say cheese,"
"Don't," he covered his face with a hand,
"Yo Brad!" A voice tingled in my ear, "We're starting,"
I watched Jesse make his way over to us,
"Camera," he said in his deep, masculine voice,
"It's an assignment," I walked backwards, "Bye brad,"
Jesse's eyebrow slightly rose as I turned,
He cannot be forgiven! I shall not soften in front of him,
I shook myself holding the camera steadily,
I pressed click!
Free period turned out to be not so bad, I took a lot of photographs, and they turned out to be pretty good. Although it was pretty embarrassing taking photographs of Jesse, I blushed like crazy,
"He always comes first!" Carter mumbled under his breath during homeroom looking down at the senior results,
I was just about to ask Carter what he was so upset about when Mrs. McGinnis dismissed us…I waited till we were seated in Chemistry to bring it up again,
"In SM Beverly all the exams we do are pinned up on the notice board. Our grades and positions are on the results," He told me, "Jesse Di Silva always comes first! And just look at him,"
I glanced over at Jesse sleeping with his head down resting on the lab table,
"He hardly comes to class, and when he does he's always sleeping or messing around," Carter grumbled, "He never revises or anything…How can he still come first?"
"He's really smart," I whispered
"Or maybe just peeps around", Carter rolled his eyes, "And with you here…"
"With me here?" I asked looking surprised at the results,
I couldn't believe, I was still in second place…I blinked at the names,
Jesse Di Silva and Susannah Simon, right next to each other,
"I always come second and now I'm third," He frowned
"You want me to do badly on my other exam?" I chuckled
"No," he sighed, "But you're so bad at Algebra!"
"I know!" I said feeling proud, "I can't believe it too,"
"Quit showing off," He nudged me,
"Quit whining," I nudged him back staring at the two names together,
It felt so perfect…It made me feel good, I couldn't stop thinking about it, I want to study hard and keep my position, so that my name is always under Jesse's.
"What are you smiling about?" Zoe grinned in Art,
"Oh…uh nothing," I went back to thinking hard about the mother-child sketch; it's still not coming to me, "How was your weekend?"
"Ah! It was fantastic!" She clapped her hands together, "Me and my boyfriend went travelling for two days,"
"Trav-travelling," I coughed slightly, "Just the two of you?"
"Of course, and it was great fun!" She winked at me,
"How can you be alone with a guy like that?" I just had to ask,
"Oh Suze," She chuckled, "You want to catch a movie today?"
"Sure," I smiled at her,
I love spending time with Zoe she's such a great friend, although being so beautiful and popular she chose to be friends with me…She's so funny and bubbly, it always puts a smile on my face,
"Really…Braids again" She frowned at my hair,
I smiled picking up a stencil,
"The whole senior class bullies you over it, doesn't it affect you," She sighed, "Hey! Let's give you a make-over,"
"No! Its fine really, I don't mind," I laughed softly,
I don't really mind having braids, that way even Jesse pays a little attention to me. He doesn't know my name, for him I'm just braided hair girl…but at least he acknowledges me, even if it's in that way… OK! Need to stop writing now, Carter and Zoe have started debating again, they will start on me if they catch me writing in my diary again.
…
Tuesday 2nd October 2009
Bedroom – 10pm
Zoe and Carter debated over politics. I watched them curiously; it's so funny how they argue all the time,
"You're just like a married couple," Ceecee chewed a piece of bread,
"EW!" They arguing couple crossed their arms across their chest,
"My boyfriend is a college hunk," Zoe flicked her hair back proudly, "Not a dork like Carter,"
Carter mumbled something under his breath then turned to me,
"I was thinking maybe you could come over tonight and we'll go over algebra together," He said picking up an apple,
"No! Suze's coming with to the cinema," Zoe interrupted, "I want to see the preview of the 'tourist' Johnny Depp looks so hot!"
And there it was the start of a new argument, they started arguing over the hotness of Johnny Depp something Ceecee was very interested in and well me…Uh I didn't know who he was,
"Get out!" Zoe's eyes shot open, "What planet are you from?"
"Earth?" I chuckled, "I never really watch television,"
"Television?" Zoe slummed down next to me,
"Yeah," I nodded
"Its T.V…and I'm flabbergasted," she made us all laugh,
Lunch was … entertaining! I told the both of them that I couldn't spend the evening with any of them as I something important I needed to do. They both moaned and blamed each other, making me and Ceecee laugh.
I had algebra next and it went pretty smoothly until Mr. Tanger announced a pop quiz, I hate pop quizzes…But I think I did pretty well on it remembering the fact that I always want to be in second place after Jesse,
Who was of course sleeping again, this time in biology
"Wake up, you idiot!" Sophia hit his head,
"I love your braids," Drake chuckled touching my hair,
"Umm…thanks?" I said
"It's so old-fashioned and dorky," Jesse mumbled waking up whilst rubbing his eyes,
"It's my hair, and I like it this way," I said
He looked at me and instantly turned my head the other way to Drake who laughed,
I'm used to be called braided hair girl, it's become part of my identity which daddy just laughed at, at dinner,
"Oh my god!" Heidi jumped in her seat, "I got the most fabulous idea!"
"What is it?" Dad asked slightly raising an eyebrow,
"How does this sound…Our wedding on the beach," She clapped her hands,
Dad frowned,
"What is so holy about a beach?" he shook his head, "It'll be in a church,"
"God's blessing is everywhere," she pulled a face,
"Mathew's right, it should be in a church," Gina joined hands with daddy, then 3 expectant faces stared at me, making me nearly choke on my steak,
"Umm…beach doesn't sound too bad," I said quietly making dad sigh miserably and Gina tut,
"When are you getting married anyway?" Brad mumbled,
"In May," Heidi and Dad held hands,
I smiled at the blessed couple and then it was my turn to wash the dishes. I didn't mind as always but Brad as always complained about drying them,
"Braid face," he chuckled splashing water on me,
"Hey!" I splashed him,
We both enjoyed wetting each other until we heard a very loud clearing of a throat,
We grinned sheepishly at Gina, who just frowned at us wasting precious water,
Once everything was cleared up, Brad went out to meet his friends and I went to my room thinking hard about the drawing and it hit me…I opened the book 'destiny' and there it was my sketch.