A/N: Coauthored by HelplesslyNerdy (on Tumblr/Tsp) and myself.
Not round not metal not it not it not it not it.
The papers crinkle under her frantic hands.
No no no no no NO NO NO NO.
Fire burns through her palm as something slashes through it. She screams, a primal wail, slamming her unharmed hand down on the tabletop. What was the point? Swiping her arms across the desk, she knocks everything to the floor before falling to her knees, choking back a sob.
"What on earth-?"
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Screaming. She knows it is hers, despite the fact that she feels like it is all happening to someone else. Hands lifting under her arms, steadily dragging her while she thrashes and kicks her feet. She can only hear broken whispers, snatches of words that filter through. "Isaac" and "knife" and "in shock." She stops resisting being taken away from the Doctor, stops moving completely.
Isaac did this.
She knows that he is jealous of her, that he doesn't like the attention she had been giving Dr. Smith. But was he capable of this? Nothing of this makes sense. Bits hastily shoved together despite their jagged edges not fitting.
"Where is Isaac?" she whispers. "Where is he?" she then shouts, grasping the arm of the man who has finally let her go.
"Miss Rose, you cannot see him now." Elder McCoy. She moves in the direction of the Murrays', and the elder takes her firmly by the shoulders. "He's being watched, do not worry."
She resists half-heartedly before slumping, tears finally brimming over her eyelids. What would she have done? Killed him? Slapped him until it never happened in the first place?
…no. She needed to get back to the Doctor. The Doctor.
The watch.
The watch so he can regenerate.
She shrugs out from under Elder McCoy's grasp and begins running towards the Doctor's house, arms outstretched to keep from running into anything. His house is mercifully close, and her legs bump into his porch. She frantically runs her palm along the edge and bounds up as she finds the stairs.
She reaches out her hand to allow the wall to guide her, turning sharply to the left to go into the office where the spent most of his time. Catching herself multiple times, she ignores the many things littering the floor that cause her to almost fall. She immediately goes for his desk, praying that the watch is somewhere inside or on top of it.
As she grasps at everything on the desktop, she tries to use what little sight she has to guide her motions. The white blur is now fuzzy shapes, but not clear enough for her to truly distinguish anything. He's upstairs fighting for his life, and she has to help him! In her haste, her hand catches on a letter opener and is sliced open. She howls in pain before knocking everything to the ground in frustration. Slumping to the ground, tears fill her eyes until a voice calls her back.
Nurse Redfern. Rose draws the sleeve of her dress under her nose and rocks back to rest on her feet. She expects a long lecture or at least disdain.
"What are you looking for, Rose?" The nurse's voice is strained, still obviously in shock.
Need the help. "A watch."
There's the rustling of papers being moved. "A- watch? Like a pocket watch? Whatever for?"
She knows that she has nothing to prove her and the Doctor's story to this woman. "It's…it's an heirloom of his. Something of comfort for him." Her voice cracks. "He needsit."
Joan sniffs. "Well, I've never seen this watch."
Rose's eyes close.
"But I'll send Mary over to help you. I can't spare a moment. Came for some thread." The nurse's skirts swish about the room as she looks for whatever of the Doctor's supplies she needs. "Thankfully one of the elders had previous military experience in field dressing wounds. Though I don't know if he can-" Another sniff. "He has to."
Rose reaches out, hoping to impart some empathy, perhaps receive some, but Joan is already gone.
Mary comes into the office just scant seconds later. She's thankfully silent. Rose probably looks a shock, but it doesn't matter. All that matters is finding that bloody watch.
After tearing apart every room of the Doctor's small cottage, outside of the one where his fate is currently being decided- but it's not here. He could have lost it in the crash or the subsequent months he was here before she arrived.
What now? There's no way for her to find the TARDIS as the villagers refuse to even near the edge of the forest, and she certainly can't find it on her own. And it looks like the watch has been lost in the chaos of this whole mess. If he dies while human, does that mean he won't-?
Rose refuses to go home to clean herself up but allows herself to be led outside to a rocking chair. They won't let her be with the Doctor, but she will stay as close as she can- can't leave him.
She jolts as an unfamiliar hand takes hers and places a cup of water in it. "Drink up, Miss Tyler."
She blearily places the voice, long after the woman has left her side. Elder Brahme's wife. The skin of her hand feels like it's cracking, flaking away. But it's not, it's that cut, and a bit of his…she hasn't cleaned up yet. Her eyes slide shut, the blissful dark easing the headache that the white blur has begun to give her.
The clack of leather heels against the boards of the porch nears her. "Miss Rose?"
Mary. She finally takes a sip of the water, trying to wet her chalk-dry mouth to loosen her tongue.
"Are you all right, Miss Rose?"
"…I don't know," she says, voice barely above a whisper.
"Is there anything else I can do for you?"
"No."
A pause. The boards creak a little. "I'll go and see if the nurse needs anything."
A few moments later, she recognizes Joan's step. She leaps to her feet. "How is he?"
"I don't know if he'll make it." A dull burn starts in Rose's chest, her breathing becomes ragged. "We've stopped the bleeding, and none of his internal organs were severely damaged, but," she takes in a deep breath. "He's lost a tremendous amount of blood. And we don't have the resources we could to fight infection should he get it."
Rose feels her own face fall, but- "Wait, did you say 'could'?"
Joan takes her elbow, tugging her along. She leads her off the porch and around the side of the house. Rose is so bewildered at the action, she complies. The nurse abruptly stops.
"There is medicine. Outside. Medicine that could save Dr. Smith."
Rose blinks rapidly. "What?"
"You know- outside." She emphasizes this word like Rose should know its significance, but Rose just nods once so she'll continue. "I can make a list of what is needed, and maybe the elders would let you go."
"But what about the forest? Not leaving the village? I don't know if they-"
"Miss Redfern? Nurse?" Elder Brahme's voice carries from the front of the house.
"Yes, Elder?
"I believe the doctor needs something more to sedate him. He's too restless."
"Yes, sir." She hears the nurse pass beyond her.
This may be her chance. "Elder?"
"Yes, Miss Tyler?"
"Let me go beyond the village."
A pause, but she hears the crunch of grass come nearer to her. "What did you say?"
"Is there a way for me to go beyond the woods for medicine?"
"No. It's not possible. Even if it were, if the," he clears his throat, "even if the Nameless did not exist, outside of our village is not safe."
She clenches her fists, trying to keep her voice calm. "You don't understand. Ihave to save the Doctor."
"We're doing all we can to help-"
"No!" She doesn't care if it isn't proper to stand up to authority here. "If there is a chance- if there is any way for me to save him, then you all can't stop me."
The elder doesn't immediately respond. She begins to panic, worried that she's ruined the only chance she had of saving him. "Please," she asks brokenly. "Please let me try to help him. I don't know what I would do if…"
He still says nothing.
She instinctively draws her hands, still crusted with blood, through her hair. She's just so tired. Grasping at her last shred of hope.
She goes to walk back to the porch when his voice stops her.
"I will talk to the other elders."
In her shock, she isn't able to respond before he is gone.
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A good cleaning up helps to raise her spirits a little. As much as they can be under the circumstances. They still won't let her be with him, but Joan said that he was doing as well as could be under the circumstances.
You have to hold on for me.
So many tears, so many prayers have been said since this all began. She knows she'll eventually have to rest, but her brain hasn't stopped speeding around in circles. More often than not, she catches herself tapping her cane against the nearest surface while she waits to hear from the elders.
Rose is absently rocking when a boy runs up to fetch the nurse to talk to the council.
She jumps to her feet. "I'll go get her."
She runs to the Doctor's bedroom. "Nurse Redfern! The council wants to speak with you!"
"All right. I suppose I can be away from him for a few minutes."
"May I stay with him?" she asks, voice barely audible.
"Of course."
She tentatively feels for the edge of the bed and then uses it to guide her up. She glides her fingers up the quilt until they bump into his fingers. So cold. She grasps his hand gently and tries not to start crying when his fingers don't instinctively lace with hers.
After a few horrible moments of listening to his faint breathing, she whispers, "You have to get through this." She smiles, trying to replicate their banter. "You promised my mum you would always bring me home." The weak grin falls from her face as his voice doesn't immediately overlap hers. Hot tears track down her face, dripping to her lap.
The next words hoarsely carve their way up her throat. "Doesn't matter what face you're wearing, Time Lord or," she swallows, "or human. You are my home."
Though the position is awkward, she lays down beside him, resting her cheek on his hand.
It's there that Nurse Redfern finds her. "Rose?"
She had dozed off for just a moment. Remembering where she is, she sits up as gingerly as possible. "Yes?"
"The council has agreed to let you go."
Rose stands, reaching forward. Joan takes her hand, albeit loosely. "Thank you."
Joan sniffs and pats Rose's hand once before dropping her own. "Come, we'll have to get you ready."
While she changes into clothes more suitable for traveling, Joan describes to her the directions to get through the woods. She will be wearing a color to denote her as a non-threat to the Nameless, who should allow her safe passage then.
The elders did not want to make it generally known that they supported her going into the woods, so Nurse Redfern would have to merely point her in right direction before leaving her.
They reach the edge of the village. "Just keep walking straight from here into the woods. Remember what I told you," Joan whispers.
Rose nods.
"Get the medicine for him, Rose. He's relying on you now."
Rose reaches her hand out, which the nurse takes. A look of confusion crosses Rose's face as she realizes that Joan has shoved a piece of paper in her hand.
"Everything you need." Joan gives it a firm shake before letting go.
Rose then hears the crackle of leaves denoting the nurse's departure.
She leans over to pick up her cane from the ground, the familiar wood now an odd comfort to her. She runs her thumb over the smooth, flat sides until she reaches the top and stops. There are new little ridges there. She runs her fingertips along them, trying to decipher the words or the picture. It's a…rose.And a pretty intricately carved one, at that. Who would have-?
A lump fills her throat. That night. The night that they talked by the river, she had dropped her cane and not picked it back up. He must have gone back to retrieve it- that was the reason he came back that morning. He probably didn't sleep at all that night as he did this for her… Tears blur her limited vision as she leans forward and covers her mouth, barely stifling a sob.
She roughly swipes away the tears that have fallen. She has to get moving.
The cloak they have given her is woolen and extremely heavy. It feels like the outside has been treated to help weatherproof it. She can make out that it is a bright, goldenrod yellow. The elders have given her something round and heavy like an old coin with a small piece of paper they said would denote where she's from and who she is should she run into any trouble. She can't make heads or tails of the design. She tucks it into the pack along with the list of medicines she needs and the provisions she's been given.
A wind rustles the leaves above her. She'd made it through the forest blind and alone, right? She is prepared this time around.
Rose covers her head with the hood. Squaring her shoulders, she steps into the forbidden wood.