Author's Note: Shoutout to IsaBabisa for being an awesome beta and even a better friend.
Happy reading!
You wake up to an aching neck a very very adorable blonde still sleeping on top of you.
You turn your head to look at the time and you nearly jerk up from the sofa.
It's nearly 10 a.m. You've never slept this much, not without waking up screaming in the middle of the night.
When you look back down you're met with a pair of sleepy hazel eyes, only half-way open. In a very un-Maura-like way, she huffs and plops back down on your chest, burying her face deeper in your t-shirt and sliding her arms up around your neck.
You get up slowly, and as soon as you're standing she closes her legs around your waist, and keeps herself up, monkey-like.
You can't stop the grin spreading wide on your face.
Carefully, you carry her to her room and lay her down, in the middle of the bed. You hear her grunt as you turn away, and a light tug at your hand. Still with her eyes closed, she turned wide-wise on the bed so she can keep hold of you.
You can feel your heart melt.
You bend down and kiss the corner of the mouth, where her lips would turn up if she were to smile, before arranging her to lay length-wise again on the mattress.
As you open the door to leave, you hear the sheets shift, so you turn again to look at her.
She moved on the side of the bed where you slept the night before and she's hugging your pillow closely to her chest, a blissful child-like expression on her face.
You leave the room and close the door behind you before you lose the self-control you have left and join her on the bed for another round of cuddling.
On your way to the kitchen you detour to the front door, having felt the insistent tug on the back of your mind from your little brother.
"So? How'd it go?"
You let him in and head for the kitchen, without answering.
He doesn't give up though.
"Come on, Janie, talk to me. Did ya tell her? What did she say? Was it bad? I mean, it couldn't have been that bad if you're still here. Come on Janie,just tell me how it went!"
"Ugh, FINE! Jesus, you sound exactly like Ma!"
He shrugs irritated, but in pales in comparison to his excitement.
"It went well…"
You mumble it under your breath, but he hears to anyway.
You look up at him and he looks exactly like when he was five and Pa got him for Christmas the new bike he had wanted for a long time.
You see him trying not to clap his hands and hug you.
You can't help but smile.
You bring forward the memory and don't even bother to veil your emotions before sending it to him.
You look down, not daring to meet his eyes. After a long silence, he lets out a long breath and you finally look up at him.
He is awe-struck. Not even him expected her to react that well.
"Yeah, that's how I felt too."
He doesn't answer, merely giving you a nod and seating himself at the kitchen counter.
You open the fridge and take out the ingredients you need for your Ma's famous pancakes. You've been in the kitchen a thousand times before, so you already know where everything is.
But you don't know when you started to feel like home in here as well.
"So where do you want me to take her today?"
The question catches you off guard, surrounded by the sound of the frying pan bringing to life what you hope will be delicious pancakes.
And you need to think about it. Yesterday, sometime during the evening you texted Frankie and asked him to come here today and take Maura out.
Because you can't simply prepare her surprise with her hanging around with you.
"Well, I dunno, wherever you want. Just keep your hands to yourself,"
You say it with a smile and when you look at him he raises his hands in mock surrender, even though he knows you're deadly serious and you know he'd never try anything.
Not with your girl.
Because hopefully, it won't be long before you can officially call her that.
Your girl.
"Why do you need me to take her out anyway?"
You don't answer verbally, choosing to simply give him the image that has been swimming around in your mind for quite some time.
"Oh."
"Yeah,"
You turn away from the pancakes to look at him.
"Think you can do that for me?"
He smiles smugly at you.
"Sure thing, sis. Take your time."
"Time for what?"
You didn't hear her enter the kitchen, and you don't turn around because as soon as her voice fills the air you feel a pair of smooth hands sliding across your waist.
Her warm body completely presses against your back, and her hot breath is now adoring your ear.
"Good morning, sweet girl"
A light kiss behind your earlobe, and you turn around in her arms to catch her lips.
You feel your brother's eyes burn holes in your skin, but you push him away as well as you can before you smile down at her and brush your lips against hers.
"Hey,"
Her eyes shine brighter than the sun.
"How did'ya sleep?"
She tilts her head to one a side, before leaning in to kiss you again.
A whisper against your mouth.
"Wonderfully."
"Yeah, your couch is amazing for taking naps."
"I'm pretty sure it wasn't because of the couch."
You get a glimpse of the mischievous twinkle in her eyes before she heads to the kitchen island and sits down.
Frankie smirks at you smugly, but you shake your head at him and return to the pancakes.
You don't really care he's seen your display of affection. Not if it means having her kiss you good morning like that every day.
You finish the pancakes and place them in front of her, eliciting an excited squeak when she realizes they're not just simple pancakes.
"Awww, Jane, you made me bunny-pancakes? Thank youuuu!"
She jumps from her chair and hugs you tightly, rising on her tiptoes to reach her arms around your neck. She stays like that for a moment, before lowering herself back down to look in your eyes.
You're dying.
"You didn't have to do that, you know…"
"I know."
She tilts her head to one side again and your mind blanks except for the word adorable.
Too adorable to be described with mere words.
You lean down and kiss her side of her mouth, in the same place like this morning.
"Come'on, go ahead and dig in before they get cold."
She returns to the bunny shaped pancakes and you look over her at Frankie, hoping he'd get the hint.
He gives an imperceptible nod.
"So, Maura, do you mind if I steal you for the day?"
Her eyebrows shoot up to her hairline, and she looks at you questioningly as she answers.
"Uhh, I don't know, do I? What's the occasion?"
He shrugs nonchalantly and you can feel him trying to hide a smile.
"Well, ya'know. Give you the whole "hurt my sister and you'll regret it" speech."
Her expression changes in the blink of an eye.
She…
Well. She looks downright terrified.
You step in, not bearing to see her like this.
"Maura, he's just kidding."
Your hand stretches out and covers hers, and you see some of the fear dissipate, though she doesn't look completely at ease.
Maybe if you tell her why you need her gone for the day?...
You lean in closer, so you can whisper into her ear.
"I have something for you."
She starts saying something, but you hear her voice catch in her throat when you graze her earlobe with your teeth.
You're beaming.
"It's a surprise, and…It kinda needs to be prepared a little before I show you."
You lean back again but just little, so you can look into her eyes.
"Please?"
She can't resist you. You see in her eyes as confidence settles in.
She trusts you.
You trust her to trust you.
You need her to trust you in order to trust yourself.
That this, indeed, is a good idea.
That you won't overstep.
Her hand finds your cheek, and you come back to her from the depths of your insecurity and self-loath.
"Okay."
Yes. Yes.
More than okay.
"Okay."
She turns to look at your brother.
"Just let me change into something more suitable, and I'm ready to go."
You wonder when you got so lucky.
…
…
…
As soon as they walk out the door you dial Frost's number.
"Hey, Frost. It's Jane."
"Yo, Jane what's up?"
Yeah. Yeah, Jane, what's up?
What is it that you actually want to do?
Because you know, deep down, that this has a very real chance of going to hell.
So you do what to always do, bite the bullet without looking back.
"Are you free today?"
"Sure, why?"
How do you explain it to him?
How can you tell him to need help? That you can't do it all on your own.
How can you admit that to yourself?
"Jane, breathe. Take it slow, and tell me what happened."
"Frost, I-…"
Close your eyes.
Deep breath.
You can do it. You know you can.
"I need your help."
Somehow, he doesn't get alarmed, but simply smiles and you can feel it through the phone.
"Okay. What can I do?"
"Meet me at the top of Beacon Hill. I'll explain it there."
"Okay. Anything else?"
"Yeah. Get your car. We're gonna need it."
He hangs up, and you know he will help you, even if he has no idea what you want to do.
If you're honest with yourself, you're not so sure either.
…
When you arrive he is already there, leaning against the hood of the car.
You walk right up to him, and look at each other for a long moment.
"I'm in love with Maura."
Oh.
Well.
That wasn't supposed to get out like that.
That wasn't supposed to get out at all.
But as soon as the words leave your lips, you realise how true they are.
How it's not an exaggeration. Not in the slightest.
He raises an eyebrow at you, but doesn't say anything. A smile tugs at the corner of his lips. He dips his chin a little, trying to get you to elaborate.
"I'm sorry." Suddenly he is way too intimidating.
"Why?"
"I shouldn't have said that."
"Is it a lie?"
"Well, no, but…"
"Jane."
"What?"
"Look at me."
But you can't. You can't look at him and see if he is going to shut you out because of this new confession, so a black spot on your converse has your full and undivided attention.
He comes closer and puts he's hands on your shoulders. He shakes you a little, until you dare to look him in the eye.
You've never seen him look so amused in your life.
"Does she know?"
The question catches you off-guard, so you look blankly back at him. You were prepared for an "It's okay Jane, it won't change anything between us" speech, maybe a pat on the shoulder and for the subject to be put aside and never be brought back again.
A small part of you even hoped that would be the case.
That he'd be tolerant. That he will still consider you his friend.
But this? Showing interest?
No. You definitely haven't been prepared for that.
"I don't know." And it's the truth. But you want her to find out. And you need help to do it right.
"Do you want her to find out?"
You nod, and he smiles.
A bright, genuine, smile.
A smile that makes you believe you can rely on him.
Trust him.
He replies to your unasked question.
"Okay then. What are we waiting for?"
…
…
…
You work for the rest of the day, and by the time you're done both you are sweaty and full of dirt, standing and grinning at each other as the last rays of sunlight leave the sky.
"You think she's gonna like it?"
"She better! We spent almost the whole day on getting this done!" But after a moment the teasing leaves he's tone, and he gives you the reassurance you have been craving for the whole day.
"I'm sure she'll love it, Jane."
The reassurance you've been craving ever since you met her.
"Why don't I give you a ride home so you can get changed into something more…suitable?"
You look down at yourself and realise you must smell worse than the whole Red Sox team after a game with the Yankees.
"Sure, thanks Frostie."
"Don't call me Frostie."
"Okay. Barold."
"Clementine."
"Ugh, fine, you win!" He grins smugly at you, and you put your arm around his shoulder as you head back to the car. "…partner."