November 15, 2016
"You were forged in the bowels of Hell, fought an archangel, at least, according to you, fight like a bad-ass with knives made in hell, but you can't fix a leaky faucet?"
"No," Maze growled, her eyes shifting to the side in silent embarrassment. She blinked twice, cocking her head curiosity. "And how'd you know about me fighting Uriel?"
"It's amazing what I've learned these past few months," Chloe gave her best cryptic smile. She remembered how Linda had told all on one of their girls' nights when Maze was in the bathroom. One thing about Dr. Martin for which Chloe was thankful: she couldn't hold her liquor to save her life. Chloe looked at the faucet spouting off water like Old Faithful. She doubt if Maze had a resource for this sort of thing. This required human intervention. "I'll turn the water off downstairs and you go online to find a good plumber."
"All right," Maze grumbled, grabbing an apple from Chloe's hand that she was about to eat. Chloe moved quickly, removing the hellblade from Maze and stabbing it into the apple halfway to Maze's mouth, securely pinning it to the butcher block kitchen counter.
"And, damn it, Maze," Chloe stared her roommate in the eye. "Stop stealing my food."
"It's not like you were going eat it right now," Maze retorted, never taking her eyes from Chloe who still held the hit of the curved blade in her hand. "Get your hand off my knife, Decker."
"Give me back my apple," Blue eyes sparked for a second, never leaving Maze's gaze.
"Okay, Eve, eat your damn apple," Maze grumbled, slowly removing her hand from the red delicious fruit still pinned to the butcher block. "I didn't want it that much anyway."
"What are you, twelve?" Chloe scoffed, pulling the dark bronze blade from the apple and handing it back to Maze hilt first. "Grow the fuck up, Maze."
She took a bit of the red delicious apple. Nothing compared to the crispy, sweet juiciness of this apple except for those delicious figs Josh Johnson had once given her. She remembered how she'd first met him; in her dreams. She'd brushed it away as a trick of the mind until she had met him in person in the park not so long ago. Chloe reached for her wallet. Digging through her business cards, she found what she had kept shortly before he'd left the park that day: His business card.
It was plain and white with a small slogan at the top, "For every house is built by someone, but God is the builder of everything." -Hebrews 3:4, It read Covenant Home Improvement and Handiwork. Josh Johnson, General Contractor. 323-776-2323. "Never mind, Maze, I've got this.'
"Yeah, whatever, Decker," Maze pouted, wiping off the blade on the side of her leather pants. She slid it back in her side holster. "You know, that was a pretty good move you just did."
"I had a good teacher," Chloe smiled, dialing the number as she walked downstairs to turn off the water and to get away from her overbearing roommate.
'What am I thinking?' Chloe looked skyward, mentally wondering if her sanity had left the building. 'It's not like I'm actually calling God to fix my faucet. I'm just caught up in this mass delusion that Lucifer is-"
"Johnson," came that gruff baritone on the other end of the line.
"Hi, Josh," Chloe started slowly, not quite sure what to say. "You may not remember me, but you gave me your business card,"
"Chloe Decker," came the reply from the other end of the line. "What can I do for you?"
"Well, you said you were a general contractor when we last talked and you said no job was to small," she began.
"No, Ma'am, it isn't," he said kindly. "What's going on?"
"My faucet exploded," came her sheepish reply. "It needs fixed or replaced. Are you free sometime today to come give an estimate?"
"Ma'am, I'm actually just right around the corner from you," Josh answered. "I'm almost on your front porch right now."
"Josh, I recently moved," Chloe started. "I don't live where I did-"
"I know," he replied. "But unless you want your roommate screaming in terror, you may want to be the one to answer the door."
"Why?"
"She won't like me too much when she sees me," he said quietly. There was a knock at the door.
"Hey, Decker, there's a cowboy on the front porch!" Maze yelled downstairs. "Smokin' hot, too. Looks like Sam Elliott."
"Don't answer the door!" Chloe yelled, turning off the water valve. She rushed upstairs and through the kitchen to reach the front door. "Don't worry, Maze, I got this."
"Whatever," Maze plopped on the overstuffed soda with a bag of popcorn in hand, channel surfing and completely ignoring Chloe.
Chloe threw open the door and the light blinded her when opened it. Tall and lean, almost lanky, stood a silhouette in her doorway. A brilliant aura of gold and white surrounded him until he stepped inside. At that moment, Chloe almost felt her heart break because he'd just been standing in the early morning sunlight. Wearing a black tee-shirt, wranglers and cowboy boots, Chloe recognized that ruggedly handsome face in a heartbeat. She remembered the warmth in His eyes and the comfort of hearing His voice. Pushing back the brim of his black Stetson, he held up his toolbox. "All right, Darlin', where's your broken faucet?"
"Are You real?" Chloe finally remembered to ask, not remembering Him affecting her this way the last time they met. "Are You really here?"
"Chloe," He greeted her gently. "Before you called I answered. While you were still talking, I heard you. Don't be afraid, I'm here. I'll help you."
"What do I do?" she gave him a blank look.
"Why don't you show me your broken faucet?" He asked. "Just lead the way."
"Sure," she saw him take off his Stetson and set it on a stool by the kitchen counter.
"Would you like something to drink?" Chloe asked, wondering what Lucifer's Dad liked to drink. Wine? Holy Water?
"Do you have some ice tea?" He asked, opening his tool box.
"Yeah, actually, I do." Chloe had made it earlier that morning. Since it was her day off, she decided to let Trixie sleep in, while she caught up on a few household chores and made herself a pitcher of something she rarely had a chance to enjoy.
"I'd sure appreciate a glass if it isn't any trouble," Josh said, getting underneath the sink to check the plumbing.
"Not a problem," Chloe reached into the cupboard, pulled out a glass and filled it with ice. She filled it to the brim. "How do you like yours?"
"Straight. No sugar," He answered. Chloe handed him the glass and he took a sip of it it. "Thank you, kindly."
"You're welcome."
Since Chloe felt stupefied by having a deity in her kitchen, she decided to let Him fix her faucet while she tried to understand a few things. Why was it so easy to accept a random stranger as God, but impossible to believe that her partner and best friend was the Devil? Chloe knew who Josh was the moment He walked into the house, but she didn't get any kind of feeling like that from Lucifer. Wait, did annoyance count? With what she and Dr. McCoy had discovered recently, Chloe wasn't sure what to believe.
She sat on the other side of the counter. "Why are You here?"
"You needed a handyman to fix your sink," he answered from beneath the kitchen cabinet.
"No, why are you here on Earth, now? Are You supposed to only be here during the Second Coming, the Rapture or something?"
"No, that's my son," He corrected her. "You've already met Josh, Jr."
"Isn't Lucifer your son?"
"Yup."
"What about Amenadiel?" Chloe asked.
"He's my oldest son, I have thousands of sons and daughters, Chloe. You're a daughter of mine, too, you know. Hey, do me a favor and me that wrench with the handle, would ya?" Josh asked.
Chloe nodded, reached for the red wrench and gave it to him handle first. "So, why are you being so hard on Lucifer?"
Josh scooted from beneath the sink. "He led two million of my children in the ultimate temper tantrum because he thought he was my equal. You don't disrespect your Dad in His own house. He decided to fight a war in my house as part of that temper tantrum and I threw him out."
"You banished him to Hell," Chloe pressed. "Why?"
"Not quite," Josh said. He nodded toward the sink. "Pipes are in good shape, but the faucet's shot. I'd recommend a Kohler, a Delta or a Moen. Do you want me to pick up one for you or do you want to do it?"
"I'm kinda on a budget right now," Chloe poured herself a glass of ice tea, putting in several spoons of sugar. "Those brands are expensive."
"I know you're good for it, Detective." He grinned. She looked up, noticing while the accents were different, both Father and son shared the same deep, baritone voice. Josh stood up and put the wrench back in the tool box. "You ask a lot of questions and since I'm going to be around for a while, I might as well answer them. I'm going to Home Depot, they have stuff with an 11% rebate right now and that'll save you some cash if you mail in the bottom of your receipt."
"Trixie's asleep," Chloe said, nodding in the direction of Trixie's bedroom. "I can't sleep."
"No harm is going to come to Trixie, I promise," He put on His Stetson and walked over to the sofa. The television suddenly turned off by itself. "Mazikeen."
Chloe stopped mid-step when she saw Maze turn around, look up and her jaw fell slack. Shrinking into the sofa, her lips trembled and she terror marred her features.
"You, watch Trixie and don't let anything bad happen to her."
"Why are you here?" Maze stammered. "It's not time yet."
"Nope, not today," He agreed. "I command you to keep an eye on the girl. Don't let anything happen to her. Understand?"
"Y-yes."
"Smart demon," he gave one nod. "Come on, Chloe. Let's find you a faucet."
"I'll be back later," Chloe said carefully, eyeing Maze whose eyes were downcast and didn't look directly at Josh. It didn't take cop instincts to realize her roommate was truly terrified of the general contractor. "Do you need anything while I'm out?"
"No. Just. Go."
"Okay," Chloe said, her voice quiet and soft. She went over to Maze and laid a hand on her shoulder. "Maze, it's okay. It's just the General Contractor."
"He's going to destroy us all," she whimpered, cowering further back into the sofa.
"Stop it, Josh!" Chloe looked at Him. "You're scaring her."
"Maze," he said in a low, soothing voice. "Look at me."
"I can't."
"LOOK AT ME." Josh's voice was quiet, but carried an inhuman quality that compelled both to look at Him. "Peace."
Chloe watched Maze quit quivering and relaxed. Her near-hysterical words stopped and she remained still.
"Not today, I promise." Josh assured her. "I always keep My word. Watch the girl."
"Yes."
"Point of pride for you, Josh?" Chloe asked as she followed him out the front door, locking it behind her.
"Not pride, Ma'am," He corrected. "Truth. I can't not keep My word. Point of truth for Me."
She looked up on down the street as she followed him, wondering if he was going to strike someone down with a lightning bolt. He took her to a blue pick-up, about ten years old and smirked when she saw the model. "God drives a Ford F-150?"
"Yup and pretty tough, too?"
"No chariot of fire?" Chloe gave peace even to the damned.
"Nope, not the greatest on gas mileage," Josh shrugged, coming around and opening her door for her. He lent her His hand as he helped her into the pick-up cab.
He navigated L.A.'s streets with ease and turned on the radio to KLOS 95.5 FM, where Chloe instantly recognized Fog Hat's "Slow Ride." Chloe chuckled, "Classic Rock?"
"Yup," He grinned.
"Beer?"
"Wine, actually," He gave her a grin. "So, you've got questions and I've got answers."
"Lucifer. Hell. Why?" Chloe asked as she remember to fasten her seat belt.
"You don't raise Hell in my House," Josh's voice was harsh and gruff to her ears. "I kicked him out and sent him to Hell to cool off and think things through. I gave him the toughest job that needed done and he was the only one strong enough to handle it."
"You made him a torturer and a the scapegoat for all of humanity's weaknesses," she began.
"Let me tell you something, Chloe, he's done a lot of things to put himself there by his own choices," Josh's low growl let her know she'd struck a nerve. "He's the one that decided he wanted Humanity to have free will, but he didn't want them to grow into it. He gave it too soon and while he didn't lie, he didn't give Eve a fair chance. She couldn't have resisted him anymore than a child can resist a puppy or a piece of candy. He did it to get back at Me because I loved them."
"So, he's Satan for all eternity?"
"No, he's Sam, my Sam, my son and my Samael," His voice became hoarse and she thought she saw a drop of moisture fall down his craggy cheek. "Lord of Hell, that's what he did, not who he was, not to me and I never wanted him to stay there. He thought he was meant to be there for eternity and that wasn't it. He can't here Me because he doesn't want to listen to me, so our father/ son talks are limited."
"Selective hearing," Chloe nodded in understanding. "Hmm."
"You know what I mean," He gave her a wink. "Sam, you call him Lucifer, is really good at that."
"True," she smiled at that truth. "Can he. . go home. . . or is he doomed to the Lake of Fire?"
"Satan is doomed to the Lake of Fire. Remember, Darlin', Lord of Hell was what he did, not who he is."
"A job title?" Chloe asked, not quite understanding. "So, in theory, anyone can be Lord of Hell?"
"Exactly," Josh nodded. "The position is vacant right now."
"Charlotte's a good job candidate for that position," Chloe huffed.
"Charlotte's off limits," Josh's stern reply made Chloe take attention.
"Sorry."
"Don't worry about it," His gruff reply echoed with hurt….maybe regret, Chloe thought.
"Okay, but I love the irony."
"What."
"God drives a Ford F-150, loves Iced Tea without Sugar and shops at the Home Depot," Chloe motioned around here. "If it isn't the Apocalypse, then why are You here?"
"What? Sam's the only one who gets to take a vacation?" Josh chuckled, making a right hand turn onto West Slauson Avenue. "Yeah, I love all my kids, whether it' Amenadiel, Sam, Josh Jr., or Adam, Eve, or Abraham. I love you and I missed you. So, I came down here to spend time with my kids."
"With Humanity?" Chloe's eyes widened.
"Yeah," he confirmed. "Is that so hard to believe?"
"Well, yeah. I mean Silver City is Paradise and yet you choose to come to Earth of all places -"
"I made Earth, remember?" He asked. "You've seen Heaven, and Earth may be a shadow of it, but most of my kids are here. I love you and I missed you, so I came to visit, to learn how my kids were getting along. I did things before through prophets and Josh, Jr. Now, I'm here to get to know you now that Josh made things right and possible."
"Did He have to die?"
"Yeah, the chasm was too wide and I can't abide evil, Chloe. I loved my earthly children so much that it broke my heart. I love Him beyond words because he laid down his own life of His own initiative. He wanted to make things right between us all and He did it. Because of that, I can come down here, live here, and get to know my kids in a new way I couldn't and didn't before."
"Why do bad things happen to good people, Josh?"
"I'm not going to tell you everything today, except part of it is free will. Part of it is Humanity is still separated from Me for awhile longer and each person has to choose for his or herself if they want to come Home. Enough revelation for today, right now, I'm just wanting to get you a faucet and I want a Ham sandwich from Mike's Deli."
"You eat pork?"
"If I say it's clean, it's clean," He turned the Ford into Home's Depot parking lot. "Come on, Chloe, let's go get you a faucet."
Josh had treated her to lunch and they rode back in relative silence with a Delta faucet sitting between them in the front seat. Her stomach had started feeling queasy shortly after lunch and the nausea followed soon after. Josh cast her a sideways look, "Darlin', you don't look so good."
"Something's wrong," Chloe exhaled heavily as a cramp twisted her stomach into a sailor's knot. "Maybe it was the pastrami with extra pickle."
"No, Mike's meat is good," Josh assured her. He parked in her driveway, came around and opened the cab door for her, helping her from the pickup to the house. When he walked in, he put a callused, tanned hand on her brow. "Girl, you got a fever."
"I feel like sh-"
"Language, Chloe." He admonished her gently. "Mazikeen, come here."
Maze came in with eyes lowered, but not cowering as she had before. "Yes, LORD."
"She's sick."
"I didn't do it, LORD."
"I know you didn't, Maze," He said gently. "Mercy."
"Thank you, LORD."
"What'd she eat this morning?" He asked.
"LORD, you should know," she kept her head bowed.
"Mazikeen, look at Me," Josh's rough, deep voice compelled her to look at Him. "I'm on vacation. Help me out here."
"She ate an apple."
He rolled his eyes skyward. "Figures. What kind?"
"A red one," Maze shrugged.
"Give me more info to work with," He urged. "Anything else?"
"She made some Iced Tea?"
Chloe laid back on the sofa, her skin was soft gray and her eyes were coated with a layer akin to cataracts. Maze gasped, her hand covering her mouth. "Holy Fuck."
"Language, Mazikeen," He warned, pointing a thumb at Chloe. "That only happens when someone eats from the Tree of Hell. There's nothing like it on Earth. What'd you do to her?"
"I swear, LORD, I didn't do anything!" Shrugging helplessly. "All she had was an apple from the supermarket. I wanted it, she wasn't going it eat it anyway, so I took it. She grabbed one of my blades, stabbed it and took it back."
"One of your hellblades?" Maze dared look up and saw Josh's hair whiter than wool, so white it appeared silver and his eyes weren't the soft hazel, but fiery red. "Forged in Hell and you brought them to Earth?"
"Yeah, I gotta protect myself!"
"I'm slow to anger, but don't take that tone with me, Mazikeen." Josh bellowed, his voice sounding like a rushing waterfall to her ears. "You know eating from the Tree Of Hell is the one thing that made your mother lose her Humanity and become a Demon. Do you want that to happen to Chloe?"
"No, LORD."
"Go out to my truck. In the glove compartment is my lunch. Grab the plastic containers with the green and red lids and bring them here."
"Yes, LORD." Maze scampered out the door and returned with a small plastic container. Josh said nothing as he opened it, throwing the lid onto the coffee table. He dug in and brought out a small dried fruit. Quickly, he tore it in two, placing a small piece in her mouth.
"Come on, Darlin', swallow."
"I don't want to."
"Do it." His voice carried that quite note of a flowing river rather than a roaring waterfall.
Chloe's throat ached, but she swallowed.
"That's a good girl," He brushed away the sweat on her brow. "You just got a hellish case of food poisoning. Now, have a fig cookie."
"You're giving her sweets at a time like this?" Maze asked, astonished. "Why don't You, like, work a miracle or something?"
"I am. Watch." Josh took a square cookie in His hands and broke it in two.
"How is that going to help her?" Maze's asked, leaning over his shoulder to watch.
"These aren't regular fig cookies," He explained, smiling when Chloe swallowed. "These cookies are made from the figs that grow in the middle of Silver City's Main Street. There's a new crop each month and I miss home cooking. The leaves are for healing and will cancel out the Fruit of Hell that she ate by accident."
"Weird."
"Those blades contaminate any human you cut them with," He gave her a stern look. "Put them away."
"Yes, LORD." Maze immediately put the blades back inside their holsters on the other side of the room.
Several hours and several trips later to the bathroom toilet, Chloe felt like she had suffered the world's worst hangover. The past several hours were a blurry or altogether blank except for the fact that she'd made Iced Tea for Josh, they bought a faucet and then everything became a mangled mystery.
"How're you feeling?" Josh asked, sitting at Chloe's beside.
"What time is it?"
"Almost 5," he answered.
"Trixie! Did she get lunch?" Chloe attempted to sit upright. Josh laid a gentle hand on her shoulder. "Don't worry, Trixie had lunch and she thinks you're taking a nap. She doesn't know you were sick."
"What happened?"
"Just a light case of food poisoning. Nothing to worry about, Chloe. It's out of your system, now." Josh assured her. "You're going to be a little different from now on."
What do you mean?
He straddled the chair so the back of it faced Chloe. "Well, you got a bite of some bad fruit and I gave you a home remedy. You're not going to have your supernatural abilities anymore, you're just going to be good ol' Chloe like you're supposed to be. Yeah, you're still immune to Sam's charms and his other bull, but no more superhuman perks for you. You weren't meant for that."
"Damn, it came in handy," Chloe gave a weak laugh. "No more type AB negative blood either?"
"Nope," he nodded. "Earth isn't ready for the Divine and you're not quite ready for everything, not yet. You need a little time to recover from your Wonder Woman phase and just be human again."
"What about Lucifer?"
"That's between you and him. You're good to him and for him and that's all I ever wanted for him was that he'd know that he has a home to come to and he finds that in you. Yeah, he can be an ass, Chloe, but he cares for you more than you know and you for him. Roll with it."
"Okay..." Chloe answered slowly, partially due to the mind-numbing headache, but not quite understanding where Josh was going in the conversation. "What about Maze?"
"What about her?"
"Can you...forgive her or something? She isn't the evil you think she is."
"Oh, yeah, she's evil, but Earth has an effect on any infernal or Celestial being," Josh said, pushing back the brim of his Stetson. "It makes us all a little more human, a little more humble and that's why I created it. It brings out the best and the worst in all and those not from here have to learn to chose what they want to be."
"So, Maze is . . .less evil?"
"Let's say Maze isn't the demon she once was," Josh winked. "That's all you need to know for now."
"Can she have a soul and go to heaven?" Chloe asked.
"Girl, you don't ask for much at all, do you?"
"Well, You're God after all,"
"And I'm on vacation. No miracles or judgments today." He answered, bending forward to place a kiss on her brow. "Now, Maze has made you some chicken broth. Stay in bed and call in sick. You'll be find in a day or two. And here is my commandment for you, "Thou shalt not handle Maze's Blades. Comprende?"
"What?" Chloe asked not understanding
"Just say yes."
"Yes."
"Good," Josh rose up from the chair and returned it to the desk across the room. "By the way, your dryer broke. I'll be by later in the week to fix it."
"How much do I owe you for fixing the faucet?"
"Don't worry about it, just get well now." Josh tipped his Stetson. "We'll talk later."
November 18, 2006
Within a few days, Chloe resumed her normal routine and was thankful for it. She didn't want to deal with God, Fords, faucets and Figs. She didn't want to worry about hellblades that stabbed her food giving her food poisoning or what to do with her changed and forever-altered worldview. She just wanted to be a great mom to Trixie and a good cop.
She shared her new status with Dr. McCoy who tested her blood and confirmed she was no longer AB negative, but it still possessed some of the markers that were unusual. When Chloe accidentally broke a glass while washing dishes, she required stitches. It was refreshing and bittersweet to be again, 'only human.' She decided to follow Josh's advice and "roll with it."
Feeling the best she had in several days, Chloe decided to review some cold case evidence and decided she needed Lucifer's consultation regarding a current case. He jaunted into the station, clearly his cheery, charming self and all eyes drew to him. "Ah! Good morning, Detective."
He saw her furrowed brow and he knew that meant something was amiss. "Everything all right?"
"No," she huffed. "I just got the bill for having my faucet replaced and it's almost $300.00 not to mention heads are gonna roll."
"Bloody hell," Lucifer straightened his blazer. "You'll have to steal from Peter to pay Paul at that price."
"No, I think God would know."
"Yes," Lucifer chuckled. "But, tell me, Detective, why are heads 'going to roll?'"
"First, some tech pulled the murder weapon without documentation, and now it's just gone."
"Right. Well, it's probably for the best," Lucifer looked away at her words. "Nasty bit of steel, anyway."
"What is it with you and Maze regarding knives, lately?" Chloe asked. "So, one second you're obsessed with the knife, and now it's just no big deal?"
"Well, we got the murderer, didn't we? Job done." Lucifer flashed her a charming grin.
"You know, Lucifer I thought you and I had a real moment the other day, talking about my dad, I I thought we were partners, but more importantly, friends."
He awkwardly cleared his throat. "Right."
"I've had a lot of personal epiphanies lately, about my Dad and maybe you're not giving your Dad a fair shake. Have you talked to Him lately?"
"Why are you so suddenly concerned about my Dad, Detective? You know He and I don't talk."
"Maybe you should," she suggested quietly. "I think He wouldn't mind hearing from you."
"You're my friend and my partner," Chloe started, not knowing what words were best. "If he's like any other Dad, he'd like to make things right with you. I'd say give Him a fair shake and get in touch with him."
"Begging your pardon, but I find it ironic that you, now, take an interest in my personal life," he gave her a slightly offended look.
"I really don't give a damn about your -" she began, but abruptly grew quiet when Ella walked past on her way to lab with evidence in hand.
Lucifer glanced once at Ella then back to Chloe. He nodded once in understanding. "Is this about me and Ella in the penthouse?"
"Look, your family matters and who you sleep with is none of my business, but believe it or not, Lucifer. I care about you."
"Really?" Lucifer's eyes brightened and his smile flashed.
"Yeah," Chloe nodded grudgingly. "I do. Come on, Lucifer, sleeping with the Lab Tech? Really? It's more than a little inappropriate."
"Well, much as I love to cross professional boundaries, Detective, I can assure you, everything you saw was entirely work-related."
"Mm-hmm? Is that is that the truth?" Chloe asked, uncertainty made her heart shiver when she thought of his possible answer. Life with Lucifer was complicated as it was, but his stealing her heart when she wasn't looking wasn't something she'd have though possible a year earlier.
"Always the truth," Lucifer reminded her gently, his heart touched by her vulnerability. "Point of pride for me, Detective. I have never lied to you nor will I ever lie to you."
"Gotcha," Chloe replied. "Anyhow, moving forward-"
"But, you know, if you ever did want to cross boundaries into "partnered friends who hang out naked-" Lucifer flashed her one of his wickedly charming grins.
"Okay, stop talking," Chloe walked away, secretly glad to have normality back in her life for the moment. Lucifer being annoying was refreshingly normal and that she could live with.
Lucifer shoved his hands in his trouser pockets as he watched the Detective leave him where he stood, her ponytail bouncing with the rhythm of her walk. He exhaled when revelation came to him, 'Chloe is jealous? Of who I sleep with? Really? I'll really have to discuss this Dr. Martin and see what she thinks."
TO BE CONTINUED….