3 days later Nathan was found crying in his room.

With Erin driving to the precinct to complete the report of the shooting, Halstead had no other choice than staying at home, trying to watch his foster child

He sneaked into the room and sat down on the desk chair, still holding a distance, in case the grade-schooler would freak out again.

Being disressed by Nathans sobbing, Jay began to speak with a soft voice.

"Do you want me to stay here with you?"

He didn't get an answer. He only received sobbs and whimpers.

"Alright. I take that for a yes", he said, pulling out a tissue of his pocket, giving it to Nathan.

Seeing the boy in such a vulnerable situation, he decided take a seat next to him. Nate wouldn't hurt him. This pile of misery wouldn't be able to scream or yell.

Jay sat down next to him on the bed.

"Listen, buddy. I know you are angry and disappointed and you have any right to feel that way. But I want you to know that Erin and me feel the same. We miss Zoey the same way you do and we hate what DCFS is doing right now. We didn't decide what is going on right here. You have to believe that."

Nate looked at his foster parent in a rebelious way.

"They took her, because my dad didn't want to shoot me. He loves her more than me. Otherwise I would have stayed in Oregon now."

Jay didn't know how to deny his words. Indeed, he was right.

That was the exact reason why Nate was still with them. But he couldn't tell that to a kid that had already so much weight on his shoulders.

"No. It's not like that."

Jay was a good liar. Even if it was a matter of time, until he wouldn't be able hide the truth anymore.

"They just think it's too dangerous to let you stay together."

Nate didn't deny his words. He just remained in silence.

"I'm sorry. I didn't want to hurt you yesterday. You hate me now, don't you?"

Jay looked at the 5 year old in shock. Another hint, that leads him to the conclusion, that Nathan still suffered from the neglect of his early childhood.

His whole brain acted by deviding into black or white.

"No, I don't. Because I know why you were acting the way you did. If I were you, I would have probably done the same, if somene had sent my brother away from me."

"Really?"

"Of course."

"Is there a chance that we get Zoey back? Or are they going to take me too?"

"I don't know, Nate. I really don't know."

Nathan looked at his foster parents with wide eyes.

"I don't want to be taken away. If they do, I would walkt he whole way to you on foot."

Jay smiled weakly.

"Your little dickhead", he ran a hand through his hair, when he thought about another issue, he was there for.

"Listen, that's not the only reason I wanted to talkt o you. I know you won't like it. But you really need a bath today. You still got some mudd on your elbow and since there is a big chance that DCFS makes uncontrolled visits, I don't want you tob e stinky."

Nate gave him an anxious looked. Jay knew the reason. Being showered with coldor hot water at the age of 2 by his birth parents as punishment, he was still scared when it came to the point of water. Even if that horrible moment was years ago.

"I hate it."

"I know. But we've got no other option. Come on, you can take your duck with you and your toys."

It nearly seemed like Nathan wanted to cry again. Bathing or showering was a torture. It needed a lot of patience and time, because the trauma was still present.

Jay felt a hand touching his own. At this moment Nate clinged on him like a koala on his mother.

Thats when Halstead kneeled down, to look into his sonst eyes.

"Alright. Old rules. You're the boss of the shwoer. You decide how hot or cold it becomes, okay?"

"No", he started to complain, but Jay wasn't in the mood to discuss it.

After Nathan undressed he started to cry and his whole body started to shake. It felt horrible to force the small child to take a shower. But at the same time, he wouldn't risk to get a red card from the department of childcare and family services.

Jay turned the water on and handled the sprinkler to Nathan.

With his foster son being less cooperative he had no other choice than taking him into the shower and getting him cleaned.

Nathan screamed and cried and in the end of the procedure the whole bath (including Jays shirt) was wet and full of shampoo.

It's not that they didn't gave their best, to get him more comfortable with water. They were driving to Legoland water park and to other theme parks. Finally nothing had really helped to reduce his anxiety.

Ignoring the fact that it would take a long time to clean, Jay helped Nathan out of the shower and wrapped him into a towel.

"Hey, it's over. All done. You're okay", he soothed him while helping the little boy to get dressed, before he felt small hands, touching his neck.

"Alright, there you go", Halstead pulled him in his arms. Seconds later Nathans head rested on his chest.

"I'm back home, I…", a familiar voice screamed.

The situation was interrupted by Lindsay, who looked at her two men in surprise…

CPDCPD

"Is he okay?", Erin whispered sneaking into the childrens room, where Jay was lying in Nathans bed, holding the little boy in his arms, still stroking his head, after he finally fell asleep, completely exhausted.

"Never thought he would calm down. It's still horrible. Any time I see him like this, I want nothing more than arrest his parents and put them under the shower with hot water for two hours straight", Jay answered in a low tone. For a short time, he stopped caressing Nathans hair, until the little one in his arms started to whimper.

"Shhh… It's okay. I'm still here. You go back to sleep", he continued stroking his forehead.

Knowing that Nate would wake up, if he would get out of bed, he just stayed where he was.

Erin stared at their foster child, before she began to whisper.

"I don't know how you think about it but I won't accept DCFS's desicion. What means: I won't stop fighting for put so much energy in raising both children. I don't allow some chicks who think they are god to take my kid away."

"And what now? You've heard that social worker? They've sent her to Oregon. They won't change their opinion."

"Hank knows a very good lawyer. All we need is to put Eric Harper in prison for lifetime."

"And you think, that's it? Come on, Erin. They're abusing their power. It's nothing more than a political issue. They are treading families like a pair of sneakers. DCFS didn't liked us to have Nate and Zoey from the beginning. Normally they used to seperate siblings. It's still a miracle that they allowed us to take in both."

"You sound like you're already gave up?"

Jay groaned, shook his head.

"No, I just try to see the truth. Do you really think I like what happens right now? I'm angry and pissed too."

Erin looked at Jay in disbelief, slowly proceeding what happened before.

"This kid had a home. She had friends, a family, a brother. This is totally insane", Erin hissed and already wanted to leave the room to walk into the kitchen when her phone rang.

She sneaked into the floor and answered the call.

"Lindsay?"

"Detective Lindsay, this is Madeline Gastern from DCFS speaking. I'm calling you, because we got sad news."

From one to another minute Erin started to feel cold as an ice block.

"Name it."

"We need your help. Normally I'm not allowed to tell you, but we got the message that Zoey Harpers new foster parents were killed by an unknown person."