Vinny: Hey, Mother. Can you help me with this math problem? How do you find the slope for this line?
Mother: That is so just like you. I mean, you don't even know math. See, there, Hojy is already done with his work. He is so smart.
Vinny: But…but…Lu, I wuv you.
Mother: Fine. You just have to click on the line and go to Format, Slope.
Vinny: Oh, thanks.
- as he does so the keyboard farts –
Vinny: Ewwwwwww!
Mother: What was that sound…Oh, My God! Vincent, you just farted!
Vinny: No I didn't. It was the keyboard.
Mother: Oh, like I'm gonna believe that. Keyboard, did you fart?
Keyboard: Of course not. –shakes head and points at Vincent – He did it.
Mother: Oh, is that so…
Vinny: No, honestly. It was the keyboard.
Mother: Mr. Valentine, we already went over this. The keyboard does not make bodily sounds; it does very pornographic things. You know that.
Vinny: BUT…BUT…BUT…
Mother: No buts. Now off to your room without any ice cream.
Vinny: Not even vanilla?
Mother: No. Instead, I'll give your ice cream to Cid.
Cid: Squee! – takes ice cream –
Vinny: Nooooooooooooo!
Mother: This time, Vincent, I am not SO sorry.
Cid: So, Jenny, you want to go out for ice cream despite the fact that in the Final Fantasy series we never actually have the slightest hint of a relationship and I am way older, more drunk, and incredibly ugly?
Mother:…Certainly, Cid. Hojo is the same way…
Vinny: But I thought that that picnic was…
Mother: No. I was drunk. I do not love you. I love Hojo. Don't you get it? After he abused me and sexually assaulted me I staggered out of his laboratory with the "picnic" items. I was going to have a "picnic" with HIM, NOT YOU! But no, you're too stupid to notice the fact that Hojo is noticeable more handsome, and intelligent, and all-together better than you. Jeez! And now…and now we have that frickin daughter Rkish just because you're too stupid to figure out how to use a condom.
Vinny: But Hojo never used one…
Mother: Duh. Why do you think I bore FOUR FRICKIN SONS from him? He never used one because he's too good for them. I mean, look at our sons; Sephiroth is so cute when he plays with Cloud, and Loz wuvs his mommy, and Yazoo has that overzealous love for bananas, and my wittle Kadajy is soooo adorable. But Rkish, she's just boring…Come Cid, let's get ice cream.
Cid: Don' worry Vin' I'll get you an ice cream – one with high fiber. You know… -in a whisper- for you problem…
Vinny: I DID NOT FART!
-Cid and Mother leave-
Vinny:…It wasn't me…
Keyboard: I know; it was me.
Vinny: Then why did I get blamed?
Keyboard: Well, I'm just evil that way. You know, it all sta –
-Vincent suddenly farts really loudly-
Vinny: never mind. I'll just be in the bathroom…eating ice cream…forever…alone…OH MY GOD…gotta go…
-Vincent runs away having a bad case of the runs-