Jace led Clary into the first-floor bedroom to let her sleep, her last words still coursing through him like an icy pair of daggers. She'd walked and closed the door without even looking up at him, though he thought that was best considering he couldn't have hid the hurt in his eyes if she had.

Now, Jace trudged up the spiral staircase to where his own bedroom was. His hand slid along the railing of the glass steps as he made his way up, finally making it up the final step where, instead of keeping down the hall toward his room, he found himself standing in front of Jonathan's door. As his knuckles hovered by the door, Jace hesitated, unsure if he would be encountering Jonathan or Sebastian, yet just as he was about to walk away, the doorknob turned and a boy stood there.

"Jace?" asked Jonathan almost timidly. Jace stopped, and after a quick glance at green eyes, relaxed his tensed shoulders. "What did Clary say?" Jonathan's eyes look somehow sad and hopeful at the same time.

"It'll take some time for her to get used to the situation," was all Jace replied. With that, Jonathan's expression tightened as he nodded in solemn understanding.

Jace stood there momentarily, head absently nodding as the silence grew uncomfortable. He cleared his throat. "Well, I've had a long day. I think I'll be off to bed," Jace said, starting to turn away from the doorway.

Before he could leave, Jace felt Jonathan's hand on his arm. "Wait," Jonathan blurted. Turning around, Jace saw the other boy staring at him with an almost child-like glaze in his eyes. "I haven't seen Clary since I've been me, really, and the last time I saw her at all was on the roof with Lilith as…as Sebastian. He often put his own bias on my interpretation of people-"

Jace's staccato laugh interpreted Jonathan. "His own bias, I'd say!" Jace chuckled.

Jonathan gave a small smile in return. "…so, because of that, my memories are a bit tainted." Jonathan paused like a timid dog unsure of whether to approach human or not. "Do you think you could tell me what she's like?"

Jace's eyebrow rose. Jonathan's question sounded so sincerely, yet there was an underlying tone like he was afraid Jace would refuse. Jace grinned seductively. "Well, she's a great kisser, to start," he pointed out, beaming crookedly as he watched Jonathan's eyes bulge in surprise. Jace laughed maniacally. "Bet you wanted to know that, huh?"

Jonathan looked as if he wasn't breathing, and Jace wondered if he went too far when Jonathan replied nonchalantly, "Well, I should know. I've kissed her, too."

Jace's fist grabbed the front of Jonathan's shirt, still grinning. "Yeah, I never did get to express my disapproval for that, did I?" He began pushing Jonathan backward steadily.

Jonathan chuckled. "I beg to differ! You practically—no, you actually killed me in Idris!"

"But that wasn't because you kissed your own sister," Jace retorted, pushing Jonathan so he stumbled back and tripped, falling ungracefully next to the foot of his bed.

"You're probably just jealous because I'm better at it that you are, angel boy."

Jace tensed at Jonathan's use of that name, which was such a Sebastian thing to say, and he quickly turned to examine the other boy's eyes. Still green. Jonathan noticed this change of expression, but didn't stop grinning. "Lighten up, Jace," he told him. "It can't be the first time someone's attacked your mansion-sized ego." Jonathan crossed the room to an armoire, and Jace heard bottles clinking. Turning around so Jace could only see his face, Jonathan casually asked, "Vodka?"

Jace considered it as his shoulders relaxed. "Maybe a smidge."

Some hours later, the two boys were sitting in the trashed room of Jonathan's, laughing hysterically. Jace sat cross-legged on Jonathan's desk chair, his legs barely able to twist enough to fit. He had been trying to organize the objects topping the desk, which ranged from clothes to boxes to weapons to a questionable jar full of black liquid, but he had only managed to make a pile of alternating paper, clothing, paper, clothing. Meanwhile, Jonathan poised himself upside down against a wall in an attempt to see how many dive-bomb push-ups he could while balancing a glass of vodka on one of his feet. He'd already broken two glasses and his shirt was nearly soaked.

Their conversation had wandered from Clary's hair to the lack of modern technology in the Shadow World. Jace made the mistake of mentioning the first time he was in the Seelie Court, when the Queen forced Clary to kiss him. "But it wasn't incestuous after all, right?" Jonathan told Jace. "You aren't really related."

"But we didn't know that at the time!" countered Jace passionately. "To us, it just looked like the stupid Seelie Queen wanted to—to just watch some siblings make out for her entertainment. Which is…that is just sick, I mean, who gets pleasure out of something like that?"

Jonathan's push-up failed, resulting in a loud thump. When Jace turned slowly to see what happened, he saw Jonathan sprawled awkwardly, one leg up against the wall, the other twisting weirdly around his body. Vodka wet his hair, and Jonathan spit out a bit of glass, groaning as Jace cackled loudly. "Some people are just messed up in the head." Jonathan pushed himself off the ground and ambled toward the bed, plopping down to glance at Jace alluringly. "You know, part of Sebastian's plan was to align himself with the Seelie Queen, maybe even…get in bed with her to seal an alliance. She has an army that could have been of use. To him."

Jace was speechless. "That's…just plain disgusting." He threw a pen at Jonathan, and it hit his chin. "Ew."

Jonathan got up from the broken-glass-filled floor, brushed himself off, and front-flipped onto his bed gracefully, sliding his hands under his head. "I know." He sighed, and there was a pause, his next words sounding significantly less slurred. "I keeping trying to separate myself from him—Sebastian—but I can't help but remember all his thoughts and actions as my own. They controlled me before and they haunt me now."

Jace stopped fiddling with the stack of cards he was holding and looked intently at Jonathan. He wanted to tell him about Sebastian still existing and stuff, but he didn't want to stress Jonathan. But Jace felt confident that he could Jonathan; if he could have tell him, he would, because he knew the way Jonathan felt, the way he reacted, and he'd only want to keep others out of harm. When thinking about it, if Jonathan knew, he'd probably run away or something just so he wouldn't be around them if it happened again. He wants to protect Jace and Clary, because they're the closest he's ever gotten to family. Suddenly, images of pain during childhood spread around Jace's head like spilled ink, and he wondered if they were Jonathan's or his own. A little boy being waved off by his father because he was busy after being promised they'd work on combat drills all week. The boy slinked off to the training room by himself, only to become angry and completely slaughter one of the wooden target dummies originally intended to practice martial arts.

Jonathan spoke again, and Jace was pulled out of his reverie. "If," Jonathan said, "When Clary does her rune thing on me and it turns out…it turns out that I still have some part of Sebastian in me, will you promise me one thing?"

Jace said nothing; only looked at Jonathan closely to confirm he was listening properly.

Jonathan's eyes were sad yet firm. He sounded completely sober and utterly hollow. "If it comes to that, Jace, you have to kill me."