I do not own Twilight or any of the characters therein...

THANK YOU...

Kelly, I have no words. I know this probably sounds redundant, but I REALLY couldn't make this nearly as awesome as it is without you!

Twi-Soulmates and Kelly's minions, thanks again for all of the encouragement. You guys make me feel the love and totes inspire me when I get side tracked, lol!

Everyone who reads and reviews, I LOVE YOU GUYS!! Thank you soooooo much!

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It is not the experience of today that drives us mad; it is remorse or bitterness for something which happened yesterday and the dread of what tomorrow may bring

-Anonymous

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Chapter 10

Jacob POV

"We should both sleep now, Bells…tomorrow's gonna be a long day…" I said as I leaned back against the wall. I glanced at the clock.

11:37pm.

I returned my gaze to Bella, and she didn't move away when I looped my arm over her head and lightly rubbed her back. Instead she just sighed softly and curled into a fetal position…not that I couldn't bring myself to take my arm from around her, but why would I want to? Soon enough, I heard her breathing deepen. As soon as I knew she was out, I tried to go to sleep myself, but I couldn't keep my eyes shut for more than 2 hours at a time. I glanced over at the clock after my nap.

1:52am.

My eyes returned to Bella's sleeping form—and that's when it hit me. I was alone with Bella… in her room…at night…

Uh oh.

I had been fine the entire afternoon, but now my body was on the verge of betraying me, and I really didn't want my hormones to ruin our relationship, especially not now when I was trying to be the friend she desperately needed. I would never take advantage of her, but Bella would totally freak if she found out about my…current situation. There was no need torture myself any longer than necessary, so I concentrated on turning my thoughts to the least sexual things I could come up with…

…Dead puppies…

…Geometry…

…Vampires…

…Leah…

The last one made me shudder, and all of the hormones that had been raging immediately died. I made a mental note to thank Leah for being such an amazing buzz kill and saving me from embarrassing myself….she'd get a kick out of that.

I stretched my legs out, attempting to get more comfortable on the floor. There was no way I was going to tempt fate by getting on Bella's bed, and concentrating on not moving the arm that was still around her, I ended up kicking her bag over. As I tilted it back up against the closet door with my free arm, I found that an mp3 player had fallen out. I didn't even know she had one. I exhaled deeply, Since I'm not going to sleep anytime soon, I might as well see just how emo Bella's music library is at the moment.

I popped the ear buds in and began searching through Bella's list of artists…

Snow Patrol…Placebo…Damien Rice…COLDPLAY?!?! This could be worse than I thought…

Since I hadn't heard of half of these groups, I just put the player on shuffle and leaned my head back against the wall. The first song sounded kind of like an emo lullaby, slow and agonizingly beautiful. My eyes turned back to Bells and all I wanted in the world at that moment was for her to realize that she was in love with me.

I am such a girl…

I shook my head and chuckled to myself. I watched Bella's chest rise and fall with each breath. She looked so pretty when she slept. All the worry lines straightened themselves out, and when she smiled in her sleep, there wasn't any pain behind it…just happiness. If all were right in the world, Bella would open her eyes tomorrow, see me, and know that I was the right one for her. But if I was being honest with myself, I knew that I would settle for just seeing her happy. Really happy—not the fake smiles she puts on for Charlie. It would hurt like hell if the only way for that to happen was with her leech, but I would figure it out somehow…if she didn't come to her senses and realize how awesome I was first.

A new song started. It was completely instrumental—someone playing the piano—but it only said "Track One" under song title, "EAC" under artist, and "Birthday CD" under album title. I hadn't realized Bella was into classical music, but it made sense. Bella was classy and eclectic like that. I closed my eyes and let the music sweep over me. It wasn't my thing, but I could appreciate a nice piece of work just as much as the next guy.

I was asleep before the song ended.

***

Edward POV

Alice and I arrived outside of Bella's house around midnight and sat just inside the tree line for hours. I could hear all three heartbeats, but I was only interested in Bella's. It was a symphony unto itself. In fact, I concentrated so fully on the rhythm of Bella's heart that all else slipped into the background. To her credit, Alice didn't bother me. She just sat beside me quietly and allowed me to retreat into my own thoughts. I closed my eyes and became so focused that I could almost feel Bella's pulse…feel the warmth of her skin.

"We should go now."

I opened my eyes in confusion and realized that the sun was coming up. I had been sitting there with my eyes closed for nearly seven hours.

"Why? Bella hasn't left the house yet, and the dog's still in there."

"Yeah, but you need to get home, shower, and change. I think it would be best if we beat her to school…"

…and it's weird and unseemly to be out here like peeping toms…actual peeping would be the only thing worse…

"You didn't have to come…" I grumbled, knowing that was exactly what I had done in the beginning, before Bella uncovered the truth about me.

"If I hadn't, who would have made sure you avoided arrest? Her father is the chief of police, you know…" with that comment and a smirk, Alice was back guarding her thoughts again. Superficially, Alice was right, but I had the distinct impression that there was something below the surface…and I probably wouldn't like it if I ever figured out what it was. I should have taken the chance to read her mind while her guard was down, but Bella, as always, came first. She tended to cloud my mind, especially since I had been without her for so long.

Alice continued, "…besides, you need to get your head together, and if you see her right now, you will not be able to stop yourself from going to her. And that is still not a good idea."

Speaking of things that aren't good ideas… I thought to myself darkly.

"We'll discuss the box later, Edward." Alice sighed, just as I was about to mention it, mild frustration evident in her tone.

I would have pushed the issue, but Bella's heartbeat picked up…my beloved was about to wake up. I felt another stab to my dead heart when I realized that I wouldn't be the first thing she saw… the dog would have that honor instead. Just the thought of it made the venom in my veins boil.

"Edward, let's go."

You don't want her to see you this way. Keep in mind that you, Bella, and Jacob in the same space right now would just end up in pain for everyone, physically and emotionally.

"How would you know, Alice?"

My sister turned to me with an arched eyebrow as if to say "did you really just go there?" I knew she was right, but that last comment had slipped out due to my mounting frustration. I sighed and expressed my true fear.

"What if she doesn't come to school?" If Bella didn't come to school, there was no telling when she would be free of her watchdog… and if he was around, how would I make this right?

Alice was thoughtful for a moment before turning to me with a sad smile.

"She'll be there..."

We jumped out of the tree we were perched in and ran home. My other siblings had "graduated," so Alice and I were the only ones who needed to change and go to Forks High, though Jasper was planning to wait in the woods close by. Alice went to her room where Jasper was waiting for her to change and get ready. As I passed Carlisle's study on my way to do the same, he quietly called to me.

"Edward… you don't have to do go if you aren't ready. I could call the school…"

I turned on my heel and entered the study.

"No, Carlisle. I need to go."

"Are you sure, son? Emmett mentioned that your reunion with Bella didn't go as well as we had hoped…"

Actually, I told him it was a train wreck…you can thank me later… Emmett thought from downstairs. I could practically hear his smirk. I knew he was right, but I growled lowly anyway. Carlisle and Esme had only just returned and were already worried about my relationship with Bella. I was happy that they still cared, but felt guilty for even putting them in that position.

"It didn't go as I hoped, but I need to see her again… and Alice says the best option is to see her at school." I added in Alice's word to ease Carlisle's mind a bit and it seemed to work.

Okay, Carlisle thought with a nod.

Edward?

I turned to Esme, who immediately wrapped me in a fierce embrace.

I've missed you so much and I didn't get a chance to tell you earlier…

"I know, Esme. I've missed you too." I whispered, hugging her briefly in return.

If there is anything I can do to help with this situation with Bella, don't hesitate to ask, ok?

"I won't." I assured her as I gently pulled away. "I need to go shower and change…I'll speak to you both later."

They both nodded and I went to my room. Grabbing the first articles of clothing I saw, I hurried to the bathroom and jumped in the shower. I heard someone open my door as I scrubbed myself down, and I heard a familiar "voice" accompanying the light footfalls.

…I did not sleep well, though my bed was comfortable enough, for I had all sorts of queer dreams. There was a dog howling all night under my window, which may have had something to do with it; or it may have been…

Apparently, Alice was reciting Bram Stoker's Dracula to herself to keep me out this time; she must have run out of languages to sing in. I sighed. She knew I hated the way our kind was depicted in that story, but there was no need to pry any further. The only reason Alice would be in my room at that moment would be to pick out a different outfit than the one I had taken into the bathroom. She left after only a moment in my closet and I couldn't help but wonder if my outfit would be some sort of retribution for laughing at her with the wolves earlier. I finished my shower to the mantra of…I trust Alice…I would do anything for Bella. Exiting my bathroom with mild trepidation I found a pile of clothes, just as I had expected. There was a note on top of the pile that simply stated, "Wear this."

***

Bella POV

I woke before the alarm clock, but I wasn't shrieking like a banshee, which was nice. Jake was already awake. He sat on the edge of my bed, watching me as he ran his fingers through my hair, which was fanned across my pillow.

"Hi." I muttered groggily.

"Morning, Bells." Jake replied quietly. I guess Jake had opened the curtain of my window while I was sleeping. The soft hazy light of morning seeped into my room and seemed to cling to him. It made me smile. Here he was being my sun again…he practically glowed.

"Charlie!" I said as I shot up and looked around wildly, trying to decide if I should push Jake out of the window or try to hid him somewhere…where the heck could I hid someone so big? Edward was tall and used to hide from Charlie easily, but he was not nearly as big and bulky as Jake had become in recent months…

"Relax, Bella." He chuckled. "Charlie left for work about ten minutes ago."

"Oh…How did he not find you here?"

"I hid behind the door when he peeked in to check on you." Jake said between chortles. "I was lucky he didn't come all the way into the room, or I would have been dead meat."

I shook my head and got up. Jake rose from my bed and made his exit as I gathered my clothes for the day. Thankfully, I was still in a sleepy haze so I just grabbed some jeans and a white t-shirt without stopping to stress over what I would wear. As I opened my underwear drawer and grabbed the first pair I saw, I heard a shuffling at my door.

"Ummm, I'll just wait for you downstairs, okay?" Jake had apparently been at the door as I was grabbing my clothes. Again, my haze saved me from the mortification I should felt. Instead all I could muster was a light blush as I murmured, "OK" and shuffled to the bathroom.

I showered and dressed, waking up completely as I washed my face. I was happy to find that I was numb when I thought of the impending doom that awaited me at school today. I came downstairs after brushing my teeth and hair to find Jacob with his nose in my fridge.

"It won't do you any good. We don't have anything remotely edible. I need to go to the store tonight after school…" I said, the last part more to myself than anything, finding that thinking about what I needed to do after school was much easier than what was sure to happen at school. Jake closed the refrigerator door and came to stand in front of me, grabbing me into a gentle hug.

"You want me to come with you?" He said softly. I wasn't sure if he meant school or shopping, but the answer to both was the same so there was no need to ask for further clarification.

"Nah, you should go home and study after school. I don't want you to spend valuable study time hanging out with me…what would Billy say?" I replied as I pulled out of our embrace, surprising myself with a soft chuckle.

"I think Billy would understand..." Jake said with a short lived smile.

"We should go, Jacob. School starts in less than twenty minutes and you still need to go home and get ready…" I turned, grabbing my purple hoodie from the back of one of the chairs at the table and left the room in search of my shoes.

"Yeah" he sighed, following me as I snatched my backpack from beside the couch, put on my Chucks that matched my hoodie, and headed out. We both hesitated as we approached my truck. The numb feeling I had earlier slipped just a little as Jacob opened the door of my truck, but it was enough to make me want to turn tail and hide under my covers for the rest of the day. I stopped myself by looking at Jake and remembering my thoughts from only 48 hours before. Jake, and my parents, deserved for me to be strong, and I had every intention of doing my best. Wordlessly, I turned to Jake and gave him another hug, breathing in his woodsy scent and using it to steel myself for the hours to come. Jacob wrapped his arms around me and sighed.

"Call me when you get home, okay? If you need me before then, for anything, call the house. Billy will get me."

I nodded against his chest, then released him and got in the truck, fearing that if I opened my mouth, I wouldn't be able to stop myself from saying something I may regret later. Jacob closed my door, then turned and jogged into the woods as I started the truck. Once he was out of sight the numbness slipped a little further away and Edward's face crept into my mind.

I may not have been sure about how I felt about Jake, but I was very sure about how Edward felt about me. I've never wanted to skip school so badly in my life.

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K, I realize that this is pretty short compared to most of the other chapters. That's cause I had to split it up. Chapter 11 is finished with its first edit and I will post it here as soon as chapter 10 is up on twilighted.

Also, the first song that Jake listens to on the iPod has been added to the playlist. I listen to it every day and it makes my heart break over and over for my poor Jakie. Le sigh.