Author's Note: Again, I didn't think I'd write this chapter until the weekend, but I got a gentle prod from Gina, so you can all thank her; ya know, if you actually were looking or waiting for this story, ha ha. And, Gina needs to get an account so I can PM her about how awesome she is and gab about how awesome the AJJ interview on No Pink Spandex was, cause, dude, it was AWESOME! (See, I can gently prod too, *Big SMILE*). Anyho, thanks to all you beautiful people who have been reading, reviewing, following, and placing this story on favorites. Hope you enjoy : )

I don't own or have rights to Power Rangers, Winnebago, Seinfeld, or Golden Girls.

In The Absence of Destruction

Chapter 9: "Evil" in Two Forms

Outside a "Winnebago of Evil" *snorts* On the Moon

As Goldar stood with his arm draped over his 'girl,' Scorpina, outside his deplorable mobile 'home,' he sighed with a mixture of boredom and disgust. He and Scorpina were currently watching a 'sparing match' between Rito and Baboo that had pretty much degenerated into Rito kicking Baboo in the rear and then smacking said rear with his bone-sword and laughing hysterically, repeatedly. Goldar wondered how this blundering idiot had EVER managed to engineer the plot that destroyed the Thunder Zords.

"Yeah, yeah, 'YOU WANT'A PIECE 'A ME?!'" Rito shouted at Baboo in his best imitation of Mr. Costanza from Seinfeld.

"Arrrggg," Goldar moaned as he facepalmed with his free hand. "Remind me to break the antenna to the TV once we go back inside," he said to Scorpina. "I'm really getting tired of this dunder-head quoting insipient human sit-coms."

Scorpina frowned slightly. "Actually, I kind-of like Golden Girl—"

"GOLDAR!" Lord Zedd shouted out the door of the Winnebago before (thankfully, Goldar thought) Scorpina could finish her true confession. "Inform me when the Puddies and Tengas report back!"

"Darrgg, Yes, my Lord," Goldar responded before adding, "of absolutely nothing but cuckoldry…" under his breath.

Scorpina snickered at his whispered words. Goldar smiled as best his plastic-like monkey head could manage. He always knew there was a reason he loved Scorpina, her taste in human television shows and Affinity for this 'Betty White' be damned.

"Hey, Goldie!" Rito addressed Goldar as he sat on top of Baboo while he struggled uselessly to get out from under the assembled stack of bones. "Let's go! Man-o a man-o. It's hard to even sweat with this buffoon!"

"Garrrr," Goldar groaned to Scorpina before turning his head back to Rito. "Yeah, you're one to talk, bone-head. As I recall, the last good fight you were in was with your pillow when you couldn't get into a comfortable sleeping position."

"Hey!" Rito took offence. "You try sleeping with a lump like that that doesn't properly mold to your head! I swear, I'm gonna have to hit up my sister for some health insurance to see a chiropractor if this keeps up!"

Goldar facepalmed again. He couldn't imagine how this once powerful ban of alien outlaws had become such a motley crew of babied softies. He knew he wasn't really exempted from this status; the Heaven those goodie-goods believed in knew he'd rather spend his time lounging around on some moon rocks with Scorpina these days rather fight his loser 'Lord and Empress'' battles for them. The way he saw it, this ban of roughians was past its prime and needed some new blood, and mostly a new leader, to bring it back to its former glory.

This didn't mean he wouldn't be totally down with going down to Earth himself to fight some of the former Rangers, especially Tommy, himself. He still seethed at the thought of them always finding a way to dodge his attacks or get out of dark dimensions when he had them cornered and on the ropes. He was sure, had been sure since the first time he'd faced Jason in Rita's original Dark Dimension, that if he was given the chance to attack the Rangers while they didn't have their powers, he could surely bring them to their knees. He may have been out of practice, but at this point, so were they. He silently and secretly salivated at the thought of getting his chance to once again take on the Rangers himself.

But, this wouldn't keep him from keeping up his cool in front of the morons he was now forced to 'work with.' He really, honestly didn't think he'd ever be able to take out the Power Rangers with the likes of idiots like Rito, Squat, and Baboo. He knew Finster felt the same way. The two of them had spent many a night commiserating with each other over bottles of blood wine and some devilishly strong human creation Finster had referred to as 'poteen.'

Just then, the pack of Tengas that had been sent out an hour ago returned. Squawking and flapping their wings like disgruntled divas, he saw them walk up to Rito with one ring leader holding his hand out. Although Goldar couldn't hear what it was saying to Rito, he knew it was demanding payment for the job they'd just performed, regardless of the outcome.

Golder grumbled to himself and smacked his forehead one more time before shaking his head and staring up into outer space. "I TOLD Rita never to sub-contract…"

"Yeah," Scorpina sighed. "And I bet they want a bonus too. EVERYONE's got to be 'treated special' now-a-days. Whatever happened to the pure satisfaction of defeating your enemy?" Scorpina asked in disgust of the times they lived in.

"American television," Goldar spat out in response to her rhetorical question.

Reluctantly disengaging his arm from around his 'ship, Goldar turned in the direction of the mobile home. "Master," he called before adding, "baiter," under his breath. Scorpina chuckled softly at his humor. Goldar smiled darkly at her before continuing. "The Tenga 'warriors' have returned." He even used air quotes when he said 'warriors.' He truly never had seen the point in recruiting those worthless feather-brains.

"Ahhh," Zedd said as he stepped, then tripped down the stairs of the Winnebago. He mumbled a few choice curse words in the process of his stumble that appeared to have offended Squat and Baboo's ears, because their hands shot up to do 'earmuffs.' "Tengas!" he shouted with lingering frustration from his misstep. "Report on your mission!" he ordered with authority that Goldar was pretty sure he hadn't really deserved or commanded since he'd married Rita.

"Yeah," Rita said as she followed on Zedd's heals. "Give us a report!"

The ring leader whom had been demanding payment from Rito not one minute before scratched his head and stepped forward. "Well, boss," he attempted to endear Zedd. "It was a heck of a battle…that Tommy guy managed to get away, but…" the Tenga hesitated. Goldar knew he was just trying to think of a way to phrase his words in a positive light. If he himself had never been able to defeat Tommy in combat, he sure as Hell knew the Tengas never could without him. "We sure gave him a run for 'is money!" the Tenga finished with obvious false enthusiasm.

"So…you failed then, right?" Goldar prompted without beating around the bush. He always hated how failed minions managed to drag out these worthless status reports.

"Ahh, well," the lead Tenga said with his head still held high before dropping it dramatically. "Yeah."

Zedd seethed and grumbled for a moment before flinging his staff in the direction of the Tenga and shooting a beam of destructive power at it. Zedd threw his arms in the air with frustration as the Tenga disintegrated into a pile of feathers. "Failures! All of you!" he shouted with the pure, evil rage Goldar and the others had not heard in so long. Rita even seemed to cower a little at his displayed strength. "But, no more! I refuse to tolerate your ineptitude any longer! Finster!" he called out, nearly knocking a now frightened Rita with his staff as he swung around.

"Yes, my Lord?" the elderly monster maker questioned as he stood at the entrance of the mobile home.

"Finish the monster you're making now and send it down with Goldar, Rito, and the rest of this worthless lot of bird-brains. Then report back to me," he ordered with the old bad-ass authority Goldar hadn't heard in so long. "Your next assignment will be to create a suit of armor for me." He scoffed darkly as he first looked at his surprised wife then the rest of his ban of 'evil' doers. "If the rest of these losers cannot handle the Power Rangers, perhaps it's time to make them feel the wrath of Lord Zedd first hand."

Goldar smiled at the thought of this. It was good to see his leader's old personality and fighting spirit back again after so long. He wasn't sure if Zedd would be any more successful in combat than he had been in the past, but he was surprisingly excited to see what he could do.

"But, but, Zeddie—" Rita began before Zedd cut her off.

"Silence! This is the plan! None of your incessant whining will change that!"

Zedd turned to look directly at Goldar. "Go, Goldar. Prove to me that you are worth the wings I once restored to you," he commanded.

Goldar nodded. "Yes, my Lord," he said with sincerity for the first time in years.

Goldar sized up the squad of fighters he had been ordered to take with him on this, his first real mission in years. "Come, Rito, Tengas! It's time to DESTROY THE POWER RANGERS!"

On the Dark Fortress

Having been essentially given her marching orders, Karone turned away from Zordon, assembled her features into a more sinister appearance, and attempted to bury the emotions of guilt and shame she was feeling over having hurt so many people she loved while she was brainwashed. She decided she simply couldn't think about that now. She'd have to be on her guard and wear a near professional mask as she embarked on portraying the villainess she had been for so long. One thing was for sure: she wouldn't be method acting for this assignment. Too many lives were at stake and she needed to retain her true self in the back of her mind during this entire endeavor. Never again would she 'become' the character of Astronema.

She pressed a button on the wall to activate the fortress's intercom. "Elgar!" she commanded clear and concisely.

"Durrr, yeah," the Divotox's bumbling idiot of a cousin and henchmen replied.

"Get your lazy, worthless carcass in here, now!" she added with authority. She turned to look at Zordon for approval of her performance. The mystical being simply nodded his head.

"So, ah, what'da want me to do, ahh," Elgar paused and scratched his head as if he was trying to remember some important point, like, you know, the title he was supposed to address Astronema with. "Daaarrrraa, Empress of, ahhhh…" Karone tapped her foot and stared daggers at Elgar as he attempted to remember what he was expected to say out of respect for a woman he feared more than any other, and he cowered slightly as he thought.

Karone really didn't have to act at this point; her frustration at the now obvious stupidity of some of the foot soldiers of evil sincerely pissed her off. She couldn't believe she'd spent so much time associated with these…things.

"Queen of EVIL!" Elgar shouted brightly, apparently proud of his mental acuity.

Karone resisted the urge to smack someone at his dim wittedness. She wasn't sure who she wanted to smack, though; Elgar for being such an idiot or herself for having been duped into spending any significant period of time with him.

"Elgar!" she began loudly before adding, "you worthless piece of scum," in a softer tone meant mostly for her own ears. She could have sworn she heard Zordon chuckle once softly in the background at her words. "Prepare to open a channel to the Power Rangers' Megaship. The Red Ranger invaded the Fortress a short while ago and believes that he has destroyed me." She paused to paste an evil, conniving grin on her face for her henchman's benefit. "It's time I show them how wrong he is," she said in a low, dark tone. "And that they have NO idea what they're dealing with now," she finished in a low, menacing near whisper.

Elgar visibly trembled at her command. "Ahhh, ahhh, Yes, MY QUEEN. Noooo, problem!" he tried to add cheerfully so as to avoid any animosity she was feeling being directed at him.

"Oh, and Elgar," Karone thought of something before the bumbling idiot Dark Specter had assigned to her could leave her metaphorical grasp faster than a greased pig. "Send the engineering Quantrons in here. It's time we stopped draining our ugly excuse for a beauty mask, floating face Zordon here." She turned as if she was about to give Zordon a conniving smile, but instead fed him a bright, hopeful grin. Turning back to Elgar, she continued, "It'd be such a waste to lose all the power he holds in that bobble-head of his." She punctuated her words with her best impression of an evil laugh.

Elgar looked slightly confused for a moment before he responded. "You got it, Queenie. Ahh," he hesitated. "You want me to get you some cough drops while I'm at it? That laugh didn't sound too goo—"

"NO, YOU MORON!" Karone shouted more out of anger at herself for her own goof. "Now, GO! Prepare the way for the evil that will be unleashed on these useless, hopeless, Power Nothings…" This time, she simply trailed off at the end of her orders. She didn't want to risk screwing up her laugh again.

Once Elgar left and the door closed behind him, Karone turned to Zordon. Raising her eyebrows as if searching for validation or approval, Karone asked, "Well?"

Zordon smiled and laughed silently. "For your first attempt at being evil while you are not in fact of that disposition," Karone held on to his every word, "well done."

She breathed a sigh of relief, then froze. "Well, I guess that was the easy part." When Zordon only looked back at her with confusion, she continued. "Now I actually have to deal with my brother. Uhhgg," she said drolly, but with the hint of a sardonic smile.

Yes, she thought, she could do this. And in this endeavor lay the hope for and fate of planet Earth and beyond.

Additional Author's Note: Wow, that's the second time I've made a Golden Girls reference in one of my stories. Like I made Scorpina have, I, as a Gen Y chick, have an affinity for Betty White. Some say it was that Snickers ad, I say it was Golden Girls re-runs. As I told YoungAtHeart21, Zedd's going to get to be more of a bad-ass in this story, and Goldar is slightly modeled after my brother with his "too cool for you" attitude towards Rito and gang. I can totally see the Bro draping his arm around his girlfriend as he looked on and shook his head at people acting like dooffuses. See, I HAVE thought-out this story (!).

So, Please leave a review and tell me what you think, and or, kick my scrawny little runner's butt into gear. It's been working lately : )

Take Care,

Eals